And I Trusted You (11 page)

After she showered and came out of the bathroom dressed for bed, She noticed that Stan was gone. She shrugged her shoulders and climbed into bed and fell right to sleep. The next morning her alarm sounded off at 9am. She sat up in bed and saw that Stan was sitting in the same chair as last night staring at her. She knew from living with him over the last ten years, that he was thinking about something and it was a problem. So, she got up, dressed, then packed her stuff. She informed him she was going to pick up Alicia and she was heading back home. As she turned to walk to the door, she felt his hand on her arm. “I apologize for yelling at you earlier. I’ll see you at home. I’m right behind you.” He offered.

She nodded and walked out the door. She had told Arthur the truth when she said their relationship was different. Stan never talked to her. He used to do things with her. He used to take her places with him and he used to spend time with her and Alicia. Now, the only person in the house to get any time was Alicia. The computer got the rest of Stan’s time. She realized he wanted her to become more interested in computers but she used one all the time for work, so it was not recreational for her. She tried to explain that to him, but he shut her out. She recognized he was devoting all of his spare time to it. She also understood he was getting calls on his cell phone late at night when he thought she was sleeping. One night she overheard the conversation. It was about having sex and she had gone back to bed and cried her eyes out. She couldn’t believe he would be unfaithful to her. Then there were the little things. He never said “I love you” anymore. He never went to bed when she went to bed. If she wanted to have sex, it was like a chore for him. No matter what she did. At first she thought she just wasn’t sexy enough for him, but that couldn’t be the case when other men were hittin’ on her. She thought she should learn more in the way of pleasing him, but since he seemed so disgusted by having sex with her, she never bothered to show him the new stuff she wanted to try. She had even gone out and bought a whole closet full of outfits. Body stockings, outfits for role playing, toys (male and female), and even a few movies she thought he would like. Though she wasn’t really interested in the stuff, she was sure he’d like it so she got it to please him.

“I know there is a female online he talks to everyday. Her number has come up once or twice on the phone bill. I guess that was before he gave her his cell number.”
As she drove back to Atlanta, she thought about all the times she’d waited up for him to come to bed. She thought about the times she’d tried to take the initiative to have sex and he had so-called work to do on the computer. She resigned herself to him having an affair long ago. As long as she doesn’t have any proof, she wasn’t going to worry about it. Regardless of how he felt about her, he loved Alicia with all his heart and would not want to see her unhappy. So, she knew any decisions he made would be for Alicia’s benefit. When they got home and were taking the bags out of the car, Stan pulled up into the garage.

She went inside the house and called her Assistant to come get Alicia for a couple of days. Once Alicia was gone, she waited for Stan to start with his questions. At first he just sat there like he didn’t know what to say. Finally he began, “Samantha, I know you are wondering who I was with. All you need to know is she is a friend of mine. This is the first time we’ve seen each other in three years. But I don’t understand why you were there with Arthur. Can you tell me that?” He finished loudly.

“Of course, and you can call him to verify it. At the funeral Arthur asked if we could discuss doing business together. His firm is in need of a good copywriter and I’ve done that kind of work for years. He offered me a job. We worked out the particular details over dinner and went to the club to celebrate a potential prosperous future working together. Why are you so concerned about him? He’s your friend and he was nothing but nice and gentlemanly with me the entire time. He even defended you being there with another woman when you were supposed to be out with the boys. At least, that’s what you told me.” She spat.

“Oh now you wanna have a friendship with my friends, you never have before. What’s changed?” Came the sarcastic question.

“Didn’t you hear anything I said? Oh, no, wait a minute. You’re using your selective hearing again. Nothing has changed. I took a job. I really didn’t think you’d have a problem with it since it’s someone you know and you keep in touch with him. But I guess I was wrong. You know what, I’m tired of going through this with you. You spend your time doing what you want to do and rarely include me in anything. You make me feel like I’m just a chore, something you have to do or someone you have to put up with. I’m not gonna continue to allow you to make me feel this way. Is there actually something you wanted to say to me?” She asked with quickness.

“Yeah, there is.” He snapped walking to stand directly in front of her face. Samantha looked up at him without flinching once. Her expression, including the raised right eyebrow clearly said, “Say it and get it over with.” He didn’t expect this from her. Usually she did everything she could to avoid a confrontation. She wouldn’t say the things he knew she felt to keep the peace. This is a new side of her he had never seen before. He stepped back and just looked at her with a penetrating stare as if he was trying to figure her out.

“I’m waiting, Stan. What do you have to say?” She questioned as she walked over to the sofa, seated herself, crossed her legs at the knee and folded her arms akimbo across her chest.

Stan couldn’t understand what was going on. When did this new person emerge? For the last three or four years, she had been keeping to herself and not bothering him at all. At least, that’s how he saw things. Now he was beginning to wonder if that was the case at all. Maybe she was right and it was he who had made things difficult between them. He took a deep breath and walked over to sit beside her. “Sam, I don’t know where we went wrong. But there is a major problem. You don’t seem to wanna be bothered with me at all, you write, read and work all the time. Yeah you spend a lot of time with Alicia, but you don’t have any for me. So I began to find other ways to entertain myself. And…”

“Yeah, I know. You spend your time online chatting, and having cybersex with Ms_hot4you. I’ve known about it for well over a year. Yeah it took me a while to really see what was going on. But you made it easy, ‘cause you got careless. And I think the only reason you did was because you thought I didn’t know how to really use a computer. You were so involved with your relationship with her you never noticed the changes in me for better or worse. So, again, what is it you have to say?”

“First of all, if you knew, why didn’t you say anything? I mean you must not have cared since you let it go on.” He screamed jumping up from his seat.

“Oh, I cared, and I cried and I saw someone to talk about it and help me deal with my failing marriage. But in the end, there was nothing you wanted to do with me. I would try to do things I knew you liked with her, but you didn’t have time. You had “work” to do. You don’t know this, but I have a whole closet full of new outfits I bought to entice you. You’ve never seen them and they have never been worn. The tags are still on them. I’ve just been giving you enough rope to hang yourself to answer your question as to why I let it continue. I figured when you got tired of pretending to be married to me, you’d pack your bags and leave. I’ve already resigned myself to a life without you, ‘cause I haven’t had you for the last three years anyway so it won’t be hard to get used to you not physically being here. Now, is there anything else you’d like to know?” She countered.

“No, I guess you’ve said everything. Oh, wait there is one thing. Do you already have someone to take my place and do you want to work on this relationship or not?”

“That is two things and “no” I don’t have someone to take your place. And this “relationship” as you call it, is not a relationship. In case you haven’t noticed, we don’t relate to each other. This is the most emotion I’ve gotten out of you in years. We have sex once a month and you don’t want to do it. I don’t get anything out of it, so what’s the point in us staying together?” She said with raised hands.

“Alicia. I don’t want her to have to go through a divorce. I know what it’s like for a small child to live through that. She needs both her parents, Samantha.” He said holding his head down.

“Yeah she does and since you’ve lived through a divorce first hand, you should have thought more carefully about your actions. You are the one who has put Alicia in this situation. I have been completely faithful to you. I’ve thrown myself into my work and dealt with things the best way I could, with no help from you. Alicia will be fine. You can have liberal visitation rights or we can have joint custody. Whichever you prefer. Oh, by the way, Liz is a really nice person online. We haven’t met personally, but we do email each other back and forth.”

Stan didn’t know what to say. He wanted to yell at her for finding out the information, but what would be the point? He was wrong and he knew it. Yelling at her would not make his actions right. He began to wonder just how much she knew. He didn’t even know what screen name she used to be able to ask Liz about it. “How am I going to let Liz know about all of this stuff?” He contemplated.

Since Stan was just standing there not saying anything, Samantha walked to her room and checked her email. Sure enough there was an email from Liz telling her about the good time she’s had with her boyfriend. Samantha saved it to print later as proof of his adultery. She had grounds for divorce and that was all she’d been waiting on. When she finished and returned to the den, Stan was sitting at this workstation. “Don’t you need to email Liz and let her know you made it home safely? I mean, she’ll be worried about you on the road.” Samantha casually asked. “Or better still, you might wanna call her. I’ll leave the room, so you can have some privacy to talk. You’ll have a lot to tell her after the weekend you’ve had together.” She remarked leaving the room.

Stan just sat there staring at the computer screen. Shortly, he heard Sam’s car drive off. He jumped up and ran to the garage to be sure she was gone. Once he was sure, he dialed Liz’s number. “Hi baby. Have you got a minute to talk? Oh really. When will you get here? Tomorrow? Cool. Well when you finish with her, can we meet somewhere? I really need to see you. We’ve got a lot to talk about. Okay. I love you.” He hung up the phone.

He had to figure out what he was going to do about this situation. “No, I don’t love Samantha anymore, but it really pissed me off seeing her with Arthur. I don’t care if it was a business meeting. I want to spend my time with Liz. She really makes me feel like a man. But I don’t want to leave Alicia, either. I guess I knew it would come to a divorce sooner or later, I just never expected it to happen this way. I see now that I really don’t know Samantha at all. At least I have Liz to fall back on. She’ll be a better woman for me anyway. I’ll tell her tomorrow about the divorce and as soon as it’s final, I’ll move up near her. Maybe we can live together. I don’t want to get married anytime soon or anymore for that matter. I never should have stayed in this situation as long as I did anyway.” He wrote a note to Samantha telling her he’d be by tomorrow to pick up a few things and for them to talk to Alicia about the family arrangement. He left it on her computer where he was sure she’d see it.

When Samantha returned to the house, she got Stan’s note and threw it in the trash. She expected as much from him or really nothing from him. She was glad she had built her career so she could work when she wanted and still be able to support herself and Alicia. She called her Assistant to ask if Alicia could spend a couple more days with her. She took some clothes by for Alicia and told the Assistant she would explain everything to her later. No there was nothing wrong left to attend to some errands, the first of which was to make an appointment with her attorney. Then she scheduled an appraisal on the house and spoke with a real estate agent about the process of putting the house on the market. By the time it was late evening, she had everything lined up. All she had to do was go by and start the divorce. She began shopping online for a new place to move. Then she realized she hadn’t spoken to Arthur as she had promised. She picked up the phone and dialed his number. “Hi, I was just checking in with you. When would you like me to start work? Yes. Oh, that’s no problem at all. If you email me directions, I can come by the office Wednesday morning. Yes, I know. Thanks for the opportunity. I’ll see you then.” She ended the conversation. Shortly afterwards, she went to bed. She would have a busy day tomorrow.

Arthur hung up the phone smiling. He was on his way. After they had worked together for a while, he’d make his move. But at least the working relationship would give him a chance to get to know her better.

*************

The next morning Sam woke up bright eyed and bushy tailed. She was really looking forward to the day’s events and fully intended to have a good day all around. She called Stan on his cell phone and asked him if he could come by so they could talk at 12:30pm. She explained she had a couple of morning meetings and she wouldn’t be available until then. They could decide on when a good time would be to tell Alicia about the split. He agreed to that and thought how wonderfully things were working out. Liz was coming to see him and she wouldn’t be available until 3pm. That should give him plenty of time to finish with Samantha and go about his business to get ready for her.