Angel of Redemption (85 page)

“Good,” she sighs. “It’s been a long day.”

“Want to talk about it?”

“No. Not right now. I’ve got a meeting in about
five minutes. I just wanted to make sure.”

“Yeah, baby. I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

“Thank you.”

I hang up and lean back in my chair. I haven’t
been able to get Emily’s suggestion about Kayla working here out of my head. It
would make things easier for us in terms of seeing each other more, but there’s
no way she’d go for it. It would mean taking her away from her best friends and
a job she’s committed to and loves.

By the time Aiden gets here, I’m ready to jump
out of my skin. The boys are watching a movie. I tried to watch it with them,
but I just really need to get out and see my girl.

“Sorry, man. We got the kids down, and Emily was
a little worked up.” He smirks. Fucker.

“Whatever. You good?” I ask, pulling my keys from
my pocket.

“Yeah. Go.”

I get to the house at about ten thirty. There’s
only one light on. I’m a little worried that Kayla might have already gone to bed,
but my fears are put to rest when I walk in and see her standing in the kitchen
in her pajamas eating peanut butter out of the jar.

“Hey.”

She jumps, turning her head. “Jesus, you scared
me. I didn’t even hear you.”

“Sorry.” I walk up behind her and kiss her neck.
“So your day was shit?”

“No. Just really long. I had to schedule a really
nasty visitation for next week, Logan and I got into an argument at Claire’s OB
appointment, and I found out Richard’s been put on administrative leave.”

“Whoa. Why’s he on leave?”

Kayla shrugs. “Don’t know. Andy has a buddy who
works in admin at the hospital. He said there’s some sort of investigation
going on.”

I frown. “What happened with Logan?”

She takes another bite of peanut butter and holds
up her finger. “He wanted it to just be them in the exam room. He got all pissy
when I told him I wasn’t going anywhere and if he didn’t chill out, I had the
right, as her guardian, to kick him out.” She takes a deep breath, leaning back
into me a little. “Emily asked me what I wanted to do for your birthday.” I
groan, resting my forehead against her shoulder. “She wants to go out.”

“I know. Please tell me you said no.”

“Not exactly. I told her she and Aiden should go
out. Claire can babysit.”

I lift my head. She turns around in my arms so I’m
caging her in against the counter. Her eyes are bright. That mischievous spark
I love is back.

“I told her they should stay out
really
late. I’m sure Claire won’t mind spending the night.”

“Oh, yeah?” I ask, shifting my hips back a little
because my dick is suddenly taking notice of this conversation.

“Mmhmm.”

“And what would we do?” I try to sound like I’m
not thinking about sex, but it’s been awhile, and I’m fucking horny.

Kayla shrugs. “I don’t know. Hang out in our pajamas,
play some cards. Maybe do each other’s hair.”

I lean in so my chest touches hers. Putting my
knee between her legs, I bend down and press my mouth against her ear.

“I have another idea,” I murmur.

“Well,” she breathes, “it is
your
birthday.”

“Yes, it is.” I suck her earlobe into my mouth
and scrape my teeth against it before letting go again. “Which means I get what
I want, right?” She moans a little. I lift my knee, making her jerk. “Right?”

“Yeah,” she whimpers. “Anything you want.”

“Good girl.” I hope she’s ready, ‘cause God knows
I am. “I want to touch you,” I whisper, sliding my hand down her side to the
waistband of her pants. I press my lips against her jaw.

She pushes me away and disappointment rocks me,
but then she grabs my hand. “Not here. Bedroom.” She walks backward a few
steps, tugging on me. She doesn’t have to pull that hard. I’m like one of Pavlov’s
dogs; mention of the bedroom has me salivating.

I’m on her before she can even get the door
closed. I don’t know where I want to put my mouth first, so I don’t
discriminate, but after a few minutes I find the spot on her neck where I can
feel her heartbeat pounding erratically. I love this spot.

“Dean,” she cries quietly. “Bed.” Bed. Yes. Love
the bed. Need the bed. Want the bed. My mind is quickly turning to mush. My
dick, however, is rock solid.

I keep my lips against her throat and pick her up
so we can move across the room. In a matter of seconds, we’re horizontal, my
body covering hers. Reaching a hand between her legs, I rub her. She whimpers
and presses her hips upward. I use my free hand to grip one of hers.
Unconsciously, my hips move against her thigh. No—I’m too turned on for
that. I force myself to stop and focus on making her feel good. I slip my hand
into the waistband of her pants, beneath her underwear, and touch her. She’s
warm and wet
—fucking perfect. I want to make her come. I feel like
it’s been forever since she’s cried out for me, even though it’s only been a
week. But it’s been a long fucking week.

“What’s the matter?” she asks, her forehead
wrinkling. I realize I’ve stopped moving entirely and am staring down at her. I
pull my hand from her pants and set it down next to her hip.

“I
…I thought you were going to leave me.”

“Dean
—”

“I love you.”

Her mouth opens. I hear her inhale and then stop
breathing altogether.

“I don’t know why it took me so long to tell you,
but I don’t want another day to go by without you knowing that I love you more
than anything in this world.” My words are hurried and unromantic. I was just
humping her leg and fingering her, and now I’m proclaiming my love. I wish I
was better at this shit. She’s still looking at me in shock. Fuck, this is
awkward. I should have waited. “Uh
…”

She moves fast, sitting up and knocking me
backward onto my heels before jumping into my lap. Her mouth on mine is fast
and furious. Lips and tongue everywhere, inside me, claiming me. We are all
over the bed as we strip each other naked. Kayla knocks something off the
nightstand. It hits the floor, but we don’t stop. There is nothing I want more
right now than to be inside her.

Spreading her legs with my knees, I rear up, grab
my cock, and position it. In a swift move, I enter her.

“Oh, God!” she cries out, grasping at the sheets.
“That feels so good.”

I stay on my knees, pulling her legs up so that
they wrap around me. Her shoulders are pressed into the mattress as I hold her
hips and pump into her with everything I have. The sounds she
’s making
urge me on—make me want to go faster and harder. When my legs start to
ache, I lower her and lay down on top of her, balancing myself on my forearms.

We keep going as long as we can, but I can’t hold
it forever. I make sure she’s close and then start speeding up. I come
violently just as she lets go.

“Jesus,” I groan, holding her head between my
hands as my dick continues twitching inside her. “Fuck, I love you.” I rest my
head against hers and pull out slowly.

I’m still on top of her, but I don’t move. It
feels too good. I wish I could get closer. I’m never close enough. Kayla doesn’t
complain, though. She holds me, her hand running through my hair until I feel
myself slipping into unconsciousness.

“I love you, too,” she whispers.

Kayla

I lie awake happily long
after Dean’s fallen asleep. His weight and the heat of his naked body are comforting.
I am completely content. I don’t need anything more than what I have at this
moment. I am on cloud freaking nine.

I smile to myself, thinking of Dean’s words. He
loves me. It was such a Dean moment, too. It
’s one of the many reasons I
fell in love with him in the first place—he doesn’t say things because
they’re expected, and he doesn’t really think about his emotions. They just
come pouring out, uncensored.

I trail my fingers from the nape of his neck down
to his back. The ridges of the burn scars are prominent. I wonder how much he
feels when I dig my nails into his back. I
’ve never thought about how
much it might hurt him. He’s never said anything, but that would be just like
Dean. When he shifts, I pull my hand away and turn on my side. He curls around
my body. His heavy breath is warm against the top of my ear. I let out a sigh
and snuggle back into him.

* * *

“What are you doing?” I
ask Dean on Saturday afternoon as I set an armload of bags on the countertop.
Claire and I just got back from the grocery store. I’m annoyed because I spent
about one hundred dollars on shit we didn’t need due to Claire’s cravings.

Dean glances up at me from his stack of paperwork.
“Uh
…nothing.” Scooting his chair back, he motions for me to sit on his
lap. I do and wrap my arms around his neck.

“Doesn’t look like nothing.”

“Applications. My dad put a few ads out for new
caseworkers on Wednesday.”

“And you’ve already received that many?”

Dean snorts. “It’s not that many. He requested a
summary of why they want the job and what they hope to get from it. Some people
just don’t understand the concept of a ‘summary.
’”

I laugh. He smiles. I lean in, pressing my lips
against his, and feel his hand rub up and down my thigh.

“Ugh. Do you guys ever stop?” Claire groans. She’s
wearing a pair of sweatpants and a tank top. Her little belly is poking out.
She spent almost two hours crying the other night about how none of her clothes
fit because of how fat she’s getting. She’s not fat
—she’s only put
on about eight pounds—but the girl does eat. All. The. Time. I had to
hide my scale because it was becoming an obsession for her to weigh herself
every day, sometimes more than once a day.

I watch as she grabs a blueberry bagel, toasts
it, smothers it with cream cheese, and walks back out of the room.

“What were we talking about?” I ask, shaking my
head.

“We’re hiring.”

“Ah, yes. So you can stop working sixty-plus
hours a week and spend more time with me.”

Dean nods. “Of course.”

I try to stand up to put the groceries away, but
he holds me in place. “Emily suggested we offer you the job,” he says quietly.

“Me? Why me?”

He chuckles. “Because you’re a fucking amazing
social worker. You’re honest, hardworking, and compassionate. And we trust you.
”

“I
…” I have no idea what to say.

“I told them you have a job you love.”

I nod. I do love my job. I can’t say that the
idea of mixing things up a little hasn’t crossed my mind from time to time.
Usually it’s when I’m stressed or having a really shitty day. But then I have a
good day and realize the good times outweigh the bad. Burnout rates are high in
child welfare, though, so I guess I
’ll never say never.

“I thought I’d let you know.” He shrugs and
loosens his grip on me.

“Well, thank you.” I smile and stand up. I know I
haven’t really answered him, but I don’t need to. He never posed a question.
And I
’m kind of glad he didn’t. I don’t particularly like saying no to
him.

Dean goes back to his papers while I put things
away. Claire eventually emerges from studying in her room and joins me on the
sofa. Summer school is much more intensive than regular school, and I think she’s
stressed out, but now that she’s eaten, she seems much better. Logan showing up
an hour later makes her even happier.

“Be back by six o’clock. My dad and Karen are
coming over for dinner,” I shout.

“
‘Kay!” Claire answers.

Not too long after they leave, Dean manages to
talk me into a little afternoon delight. Actually, I walk around in only my
underwear until he throws me over his shoulder. We never make it to the bed. He
takes me up against the bedroom door in the hallway, my legs wrapped tightly
around his waist as he pumps into me, growling and grunting against my neck. It’s
fantastic. We shower and dress and still have time to prep the food for the
grill before my dad and stepmom arrive.

Claire and Logan show up right on time. Karen
takes to Logan immediately, drawing him into a big hug. At first he looks
startled and unsure about how to react, but after a second he hugs her back.
They sit and talk for over an hour. I can’t really hear what they’re saying
because I’m sitting on Dean’s lap while he and my dad talk about the Twins
game, but Karen’s expressions tell me it’s not all sunshine and flowers.
Claire, who’s sitting between them, is holding tightly to Logan’s hand and stroking
his arm comfortingly. I wish I knew what they were talking about.

Other than the obviously serious conversation,
the night is easy and fun. Dean and my dad get pretty toasted, and around
eleven Karen drags my dad out with a roll of her eyes. I snort when he grabs
her butt on the way to their car, making her squeal. Dean is all but passed out
on the deck chair. I’m not sure where Logan and Claire have gone, but as I’m
escorting Dean to bed, I see that her door is open and they’re not in the room,
so I’m not too worried.

Dean kind of falls into bed, and I strip him of
his jeans. Getting his shirt off is a little harder, especially because he’s
trying to pull me down on top of him, but eventually I get him situated.

“I love you,” he mumbles, mostly asleep. “Have I
told you that?”

“Yeah, baby, you have,” I chuckle lightly.

* * *

The next morning, Dean is
hungover and grumpy that he has to go to work on a Sunday.

“I’m gonna make sure the new guy has weekends,”
he moans. Since he’s already in a bad mood, I don’t point out that if I took
the job, it would be me who would get those hours and we’d never see each
other. Instead, I hand him a travel mug of strong coffee and send him off with
a kiss. He’s working for three days straight, but Wednesday is his birthday, so
we’ve both taken Wednesday and Thursday off.

A couple of hours later, Claire is off shopping
with Caitlynn, and I
’ve dusted, disinfected, and scrubbed the house from
top to bottom. I make a “quick” run to Target to get a few more cleaning
supplies. One hundred forty-three dollars later, I’m on my way home. Other than
a bottle of Windex and the package of paper towels that were on my original
list, I honestly have no idea what I bought.

Pulling up to the house, I see Andy’s car in the
driveway. It takes me off guard. He’s spent so much time at Sara’s lately that
I’ve almost forgotten he lives here.
He’s sitting on the couch in the
living room watching TV. Turning, he gives me a big grin.

“Hey, buttercup.”

I drop my bags on the floor before flopping down
next to him and nudging my way under his arm. He obliges and lifts it up so I
can lean in close.

“Hi,” I finally say.

“You’ve been busy. This place is practically
sparkling.”

“I got bored.”

“I see that. What else is going on?”

“Nothing.”

“Hmmm. Why don’t I believe you?” he asks
suspiciously.

I take a deep breath. “I just miss you.”

“I miss you, too,” he sighs. “I guess it was
bound to happen someday, though, right?”

“Yep. It was.” We’re quiet for a long time,
letting the noises from
 
The
Deadliest Catch
 fill the room.

“Spill it, Kayla,” he finally says when the
closing credits start to roll. “I know you have something on your mind.”

I lean back so I can see his face. “Are you still
considering moving in with Sara?” I ask quietly.

“Uh, yeah. It’s still being discussed. Why?”

I shrug. “I’ve been thinking about it a lot
lately. Sara is stupid happy with you there,
” I say. Andy laughs. The
smile lingers on his face. He’s stupid happy, too. “I think that if it’s
something you really want to do, you should do it.”

“We’ve had this conversation, buttercup. What
about you?”

“We had this conversation a long time ago. Things
have changed. I’ve got Claire to take care of. And in less than six months, we’re
going to have a baby, too. That should be enough to keep me busy.”

“That’s not much of an argument for being able to
afford this place on your own.”

He
’s right. It’s not. I’m not sure how I’m
going to afford taking care of Claire and her baby, but I don’t want Andy to
sacrifice what he wants for me.

I still haven
’t responded when Andy cuts
in. “What about Dean?”

I roll my lips together and look down at my hands.
I’ve been trying to figure out where exactly Dean and I are going. Is what we
have serious enough to take it to the next level? Is it too soon? I’m not sure.

“
What about him?” I ask, sniffing.

“He’s here all the time. You thinking about asking
him to move in?”

“I’m not trying to replace you,” I protest
quickly.

“I know that.” He snorts and shakes his head.
“Jesus, Kayla. How old are we? Seriously? Yeah, I want to move in with Sara. I
want to marry her. I want to have two-point-five kids, a mutt named Max, and a
house with a picket fence. I want to spend the rest of my life with her.” My
eyes widen at his confession. “Isn’t that what you want with Dean?” he asks.

I open my mouth, but no words come out—only
the squeak of someone who has no idea what to say. This seems to be happening
to me a lot lately.

“I know this is the next step,” he continues, not
looking at me. “But I keep wondering if I’m rushing into it.”

“You’re not,” I say, finding my voice.
“It’s
not like you’re getting any younger.” I smile when his head snaps up.

“Thanks a lot.”

I feel better now that I’ve successfully steered
the conversation away from Dean and me.

“I’m kidding, but I
’m not. I’m not a kid
anymore, Andy. You don’t have to take care of me. I’ll be just fine.”

“I know you will, buttercup,” he says, drawing me
into a big hug.

We don’t talk about relationships any more for
the rest of the night. I grab a couple of beers and Andy turns on the Wii,
challenging me to games of bowling and boxing. By the time Claire gets home, we’re
lying on the floor throwing bottle caps at each other.

“You guys are weird,” she says, shaking her head.
This makes us laugh hysterically.

“Did you get anything good?” I ask, rolling over
onto my stomach.

“I guess. It sucks not having a credit card. I
ran out of money too fast. Caitlynn had to buy me dinner.”

“If you need more money, just tell me.” I don’t
make a lot, but I have a decent-size savings account, and I’m getting a small
stipend for kinship care of Claire. I don’t want her to worry about money.

“I’m fine. I have enough,” she assures.
“I
just didn’t bring it with me. Anyway, I’m going to bed. I have to get up for
school in the morning.”

“
Night,” Andy and I say in tandem.

“I think that’s my cue, too,” I groan, pushing
myself up off the floor.

“Good night, buttercup,” Andy mumbles.

“
Night. See you in the morning.”

* * *

The next couple of days
pass by too slowly. The hours drag, despite the fact that I’ve got a full
schedule.

Dean and I don’t get many chances to talk. He’s
struggling with the new boys in the house. One of them is a fighter. I worry
about Matty, but I know that either Dean or Dana would tell me if he wasn’t
okay. Still, I can’t help myself.

Tuesday, I spend all day in the field. I’m
excited to see Dean, but when I get home, he’s not there. Half an hour later, I
get a text.

I frown and set my phone down a little harder
than I intend. I’m not mad, just disappointed.

“What’s the matter?” Claire asks from the floor
of the living room, startling me. She’s lying on her side, her head resting on
her hand.

“Jesus!” I yelp. “Nothing. What are you doing?”

“Studying, what else?” She tries to smile, but it’s
forced. I have to admit, I miss my carefree little sister. I know this is all
part of the reality of her situation, but I feel bad for her. She rolls onto
her back, throwing an arm over her face. “Do I have to graduate?”