Annihilate Me (Vol. 4) (The Annihilate Me Series) (32 page)

On
the second day, I woke with Alex at my side.
 
When I stirred, he turned over and
looked at me with expectation.

“Good
morning,” he said.
 
“How are you?”

I
was clear-eyed when I looked at him.
 
Finally, I felt normal.
 
I
leaned forward and kissed him on the lips.
 
“I’m fine,” I said.
 
“You
could also say that I’m lucky.”

I
sat up in bed and looked around his bedroom.
 
It was bright outside.
 
It was morning.
 
The light almost hurt my eyes, but I was
grateful to see the sun.
 
I squinted
into it, and then I adjusted to it and turned to Alex.
 
“I love you,” I said.
 
“Thank God this is over.”

“I
need to apologize to you.”

“For
what?”

“For
not waiting for you while you used the restroom at Henri’s.
 
For not dropping all of the deals and
all of the takeovers.
 
All of this
could have been prevented if I’d done that.”

“But
we agreed that we couldn’t do that.
 
If we had, we never would have drawn him to us.
 
He would have
just
disappeared and gotten away with it
all.
 
I’m glad that he’s dead.”

“After
what he put you through—”

“After
what he put
us
through.”

“You
bore the brunt of it.
 
But I’m also
glad that he’s dead.”

“Have
you heard from his father?”

“I
have.”

“What
did he have to say?”

“How
sorry he was.
 
At some point, he
wants to tell you that in person.”
 

“I’d
meet with him.
 
This has to be hard
on him.
 
He didn’t know what his son
was doing.
 
I’m sure the press has
humiliated the hell out of him.”

“To
put it lightly.
 
Look, I’ve decided
not to take over his airline,” Alex said.
 
“I don’t want anything to do with it at this point.
 
It’s got blood all over it.
 
Yesterday, I conferred with the board,
and they unanimously agreed to halt all takeover proceedings immediately.”

I
smiled at him.
 
“I assume Gordon is
happy.”

“I
don’t know.
 
He sounded numb when I
told him.
 
He’s got a lot to absorb,
and it won’t happen quickly.
 
This
will take some pressure off him so he can tend to Jake’s funeral.
 
And then, I’m afraid he’s really going
to go through a tough time of it.
 
At some point, he’s going to have to face who his son was, and what his
son did.”

I
looked at the clock on the bedside table.
 
“I don’t want to hold you up.
 
You probably should get ready for work.
 
I hope you don’t mind if I take the week
off.”

“I
don’t.
 
In fact, I’m not going to
work.
 
I’m also taking the week
off.
 
I’m staying with you.”

“You
are?”

“I
don’t want to leave you.
 
We’ll stay
here.
 
Watch movies.
 
When you’re ready, maybe we’ll go out to
dinner.
 
There are no more
threats.
 
We’re free to do whatever
we want, whether that’s staying here, or going out.
 
Maybe later in the week, if you feel up
for it, we can treat Lisa, Tank, and Blackwell to dinner.”

“I
need to see them again—soon.
 
Where would we take them?”

“How
do you feel about having dinner here?
 
I’ll bring in a chef and a bartender.
 
I want you to enjoy this.
 
So if it’s something you want, let me
know, and I’ll worry about it.
 
I
have a chef in mind who is fantastic.
 
When and if you’re ready, just tell me, and I’ll make it happen.”

After
three days of watching movies, reading a new book, and missing my friends, I
asked him to make it happen.
 
If
Jake Kobus taught me anything, it’s that life is precious.
 
It wasn’t to be wasted.
 
I needed to be with everyone again.

*
 
*
 
*

On
the day we had dinner, Lisa, Blackwell, and I met each other at four o’clock
for our chance in Bernie’s chair.
 

Alex
had insisted upon it.
 
Blackwell had
taken Lisa on a buying spree, purchasing each of us a new dress.
 
Now, we were in the same mock dressing
room I’d used for months, and with the champagne flowing, it was a totally
different experience from what I’d known before.

We
were loose and having fun.
 
For the
first time in a long time, it was about fun.
 
Not business.
 
Not trying to catch the rat.

Lisa
was first in Bernie’s chair, which Blackwell naturally couldn’t help but
monitor.
 

“My
perfect size zero,” she said.
 
“Look
at you.
 
So pretty.
 
So petite.
 
So in need of a makeover.
 
Bernie will give you that.
 
We can’t have you looking like one of
your undead things.”

“My
undead peeps?” she said.

“I
don’t know what that means.
 
What I
do know is that you need some work.”

“Am
I that bad?” Lisa asked, looking at herself in the mirror.
 
She turned her head from side to side,
and as she did, her face fell.

“You’re
worse.
 
Look at your pallor.
 
You’ve practically become one of your
characters.”

“That’s
harsh.”

“That’s
the truth.
 
Bernie, get rid of the
dark circles beneath her eyes, and for the love of God, give her a healthy
glow, complete with a fresh flash of buoyant blonde hair.
 
I have a feeling that she’s been writing
so much—probably in sweats and a T-shirt, the thought of which makes me
want to itch—that she’s almost undead herself.
 
We need to spank this girl to life.
 
We need to pinch her cheeks—all of
them.”
 
She paused for a moment, and
then she said to Lisa, “That is, of course, if you still want to continue to
capture Tank’s attention.”

“Of
course I want that.
 
Not that I ever
know where I am with him.”

“He’s
a wonderful boy, but I do admit that he’s a bit remote.
 
I think that’s his military upbringing,
but what do I know?
 
It could be
deeper.
 
Some people who go into the
military do so because they had difficult childhoods.
 
They seek structure there.
 
Maybe Tank needed that.
 
Do you want to be with him?”

“Yes,
but he’s making it difficult.
 
Just
when I think I have a handle on him, just when I think that he might want to
get serious about me, I suddenly can’t read him.
 
It’s frustrating, Ms. Blackwell.
 
Trust me, I’ve tried, but there’s been
almost no progress.
 
We’ve been
dating three months now.
 
He still
hesitates when he leans in for a kiss.
 
That isn’t normal.
 
Other
things aren’t normal.
 
I don’t know
what he wants.”

“What
other things aren’t normal?”

“We
should have had sex at this point!”

“What
are you, a slut?”

“A
what?”

“A
slut.”

“After
dating exclusively for three months with one man?
 
Wanting to sleep with him hardly makes
me a slut.”

“In
whose generation?”

“Probably
not yours.
 
In my generation?
 
If you’re serious about someone?
 
You’ve got maybe one month to make it
happen in bed.
 
Some would say even
less than that.”

“What
would Jennifer say?”

“Alex
is Jennifer’s first relationship.”

“And
I believe she held out.”

“And
I believe I’m not going to discuss my friend or her relationship with you.”

“I
think I’ve lost my mind,” Blackwell said.
 
“Just one month to have sex, or the relationship is finished.
 
Imagine, Bernie.
 
One month.
 
What’s happened?
 
I’ll tell you.
 
The petal has wilted.
 
The rose has dropped its thorns.
 
Where are my daughters?
 
I need to talk to them now.”

“Maybe
you do,” Lisa said.
 
I knew my girl
well, and I could tell she was becoming angry.
 
“If they’re honest with you, ask them if
they feel the same pressure.”

“Don’t
you dare bring my daughters into this.”

“I
believe you did.
 
And one day,
you’re going to need to have that talk with them.
 
If it isn’t already too late.”

“Too
late?
 
They know better.
 
They know not to have sex with someone
after just one month.
 
I brought
them up better than that.”

“Maybe
you did, but you have some serious blinders on if you think they listened.”

“You’ve
gone from a size zero to a size eighteen in one minute.”

“You’re
just being dramatic.”

“I
am far from dramatic.”

“Seriously?
 
Look.
 
One day, if your daughters feel safe with
you, they might need for you to hear what they’re going through.
 
OK?
 
Ms. Blackwell, I’m the same as Jennifer.
 
I don’t pull any punches.
 
I’m a Maine girl, and I’m blunt because
of it.”

“So
I hear.”

“Are
you going to listen to me?
 
This is
what it’s like for our generation.
 
It’s tough out there, and Tank isn’t making it any easier for me.
 
So, will you help me?
 
I really like Tank.
 
I need your help—whatever it
takes.
 
I need your guidance.
 
I need your insight.
 
But I can tell you this—my
self-esteem doesn’t need to hear that you think that I’m a slut.
 
Jesus.
 
All I’ve done for years is write and
focus on my work.
 
I’ve been
celibate forever.
 
I can’t tell you
the last time I had sex, and believe me, since we’ve been in the city?
 
Oh, I’ve had my share of opportunities,
all of which I shunned.
 
But at this
point in my life, I want the real thing.
 
I want to be in love.
 
I’m
ready for that next step, but only with a good man.
 
I think Tank is that man.
 
But he’s so stoic, I have zero idea
about how to attract him to me.”

After
that diatribe, I just covered my face in my hands while Blackwell cleared her
throat.
 
Lisa didn’t know her like I
did.
 
What the hell was Blackwell
going to say to her now?

“Fine
then,” she said.
 
“Bernie?
 
Let’s give Tank what he wants.
 
Something elegant, yet fresh.
 
Cutting edge.
 
And obviously, something with a plunging
neckline that will catch his attention.
 
At least this girl has a rack.
 
Let’s show it off, but with a trace of discretion.”
 

She
leaned toward Lisa’s ear, but she didn’t drop her voice.
 
“One day, you’ll know what Jennifer
knows all too well.
 
I say things
that I don’t really mean.
 
I provoke
in an effort to reveal.
 
I make
scenes in order to tease things out of someone for a reason.”

Lisa
just looked at her.
 
“What are
talking about?”

“I
just made you come clean in ways you never expected to come clean.
 
Because when I do that?
 
That’s when magic happens and I see you
at your most vulnerable.
 
That’s
when I see the true you.
 
That’s
when I see all of you.
 
And that’s
how I’ll know how to dress and style you tonight.
 
So, no hard feelings, my dear.
 
You’re not a slut.
 
I know that.
 
I was just joking.
 
I actually have a high opinion of
you.
 
But what I just got from
you?
 
I just got the goods that are
going to help nail you what you want most—Tank.
 
So, you know, you can thank me later.”