Another Chance (35 page)

"But with it, will you be?  You weren't when Amy became a midwife."

He sighed, felt his heart start to tremble.  "You were right.  When she became a midwife I felt I wasn't enough for her.  That I couldn't make her happy.  But looking back with fresh eyes, I see that what you said was exactly right.  She wasn't unhappy with me, she never was.  And," he hung his head in shame, "she'd told me so.  I'd just been too stubborn to hear it."

It hurt to know that.  To know that, despite his wife's words, he hadn't believed her.  Hadn't believed enough in their love to accept her words were the truth.  He'd let his pride get in the way.

He wouldn't make the same mistake again.

He guided her gently to her feet and then took both her hands.  "I love you, Doctor Jillian Matthews and I'd be honored to be your husband.  I promise to cherish you, to honor you and to respect the fact that you're a damn fine veterinarian.  I've seen your work.  I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I kept that talent from helping others.

"Be my wife, be Annabelle's mother and I promise I'll love you and our life together for as long as I live."

Jillian couldn't hold back the tears.  They pushed against her eyes as hard as the love that pushed against her breasts.  She'd moved west to be a doctor.  To work at what she loved to prove to herself, not to mention Clint and every other person who'd doubted her, that she could do it.

And in the end, she'd gotten so much more.

Jillian blinked to clear her vision.  With her heart bursting, she wiped the tear that crept down his cheek.

His chin wobbled.  "I don't want to lose you."

"You won't," she smiled.  "I'd already decided that without you, being a doctor wouldn't make me happy.  You're my heart, Wade.  You're my home.  But I had to ask, had to know you were sure."

"I am.  I've never been more sure of anything in my life."  He cupped her cheek.  "You really would have given it up for me?"

"I really would have."  Then she smiled, threw her arms around his neck.  "But I'm really glad I won't have to."

***

The feed mill was gone.  By the time the men had gotten to town, there was nothing they could do but water down the closest buildings and boardwalk to keep it from spreading.  Four hours after they'd ridden out, they'd ridden back in, faces drawn and clothes smelling of smoke.

Wade had remained at the ranch with Jillian, saying nothing of what had happened to Harvey when Annabelle was within hearing range.  But she and Jacob, who'd rebounded quick from his ordeal, were busy talking and stealing cookies when they thought the adults weren't watching.

"You going to go get his body?" Wade asked Shane.  Since Eileen had insisted the rest of the wedding celebration continue, Wade and Shane had availed themselves to some whiskey.

"Yeah, but he can wait.  He's ruined enough of my day already."

"Amen to that."  Wade drank deeply.  The burn helped soothe the last of his frayed nerves.

"You all right?  I've shot a man before, and I know that can linger."

Wade shrugged, his gaze on Jillian, whom he hadn't let get too far out of his reach.  "It was him or me.  I figured I have more to live for."

"I can't believe you're getting married."

"Yeah," he grinned.  "Think you'll ever do the same?"

Shane froze but he was saved answering when Scott sidled up.  "Are we going eat soon?  All that fire fighting's made me hungry."

"What fighting?  We mostly just watched it burn."

Scott grinned.  "Like I said, it made me hungry."

Wade saw Steven and his wife approach Jillian.  Though she was with Silver, he wasn't sure what the hell Steven was up to and Jillian didn't need any more aggravation.

He got to Jillian's side at the same time as Steven.  Silver eased out of the way.  Wade took Jillian's hand, felt as though he could walk on water when she looked at him, her eyes brimming with love.

"Miss Matthews?"

"Yes?"

"My wife tells me what you did for Jacob today."  He drew an uneven breath.  "Thank you.  Thank you for protecting my boy."

"He's worth protecting.  I like Jacob very much.  You're both very lucky to have such a wonderful son."

Clearly overtaken by emotion, Steven nodded.  His clothes were sooty, as though he'd been closer to the fire than he should have been.  But then Wade knew if his ranch were going up in flames, he'd try everything he could to save it.

"Well, I just wanted to give my thanks," he finally managed.  His wife dabbed at her eyes with a handkerchief.  He put an arm around her shoulders and turned to leave.

"Mr. Garvey?  I'm sorry for your feed mill.  If I-"

He held up a hand.  "I had a bone to pick with what you did and was more than happy to get anybody I could on my side.  I never meant you physical harm, Miss Matthews, and I'm ashamed you were hurt because I encouraged a man like Harvey Black."

"Harvey Black was evil, Steven.  I understand that what he did, he did of his own accord.  I don't hold you accountable."

Wade hadn't noticed until then that they'd gathered a following.  The sudden silence should have given it away.  They all watched to see what Steven would do next.

"Then you're a bigger person than I was, Miss Matthews."  He held out his hand.  "Cedar Springs is lucky to have you."

"I hate the waiting," Wade said from his post at the kitchen window.  His guts were in knots.  He wiped the sweat off his brow; his gaze fixed on the open barn door, the golden light that spilled from it and the two people sitting just outside its entrance.

James came to Wade's side, peered out the window.  "Jillian and Scott haven't moved.  Hope mustn't be delivering yet."

Wade closed his eyes, prayed this would be over soon.  And he prayed that by the end of it they'd have a filly.  A filly between Hope and Whiskey would be a good solid step to the beginning of his and Scott's horse breeding program.  And Wade had already decided whatever money came from the foal would go back to Scott.

Full partner or not, it was Scott's money that had allowed them to buy a few mares and give the horse ranch its start.  The other mares weren't due for another month, since it had taken that long for Scott to convince Wade to accept his money.

He hoped Scott wouldn't regret that decision.

"Why don't you come play cards with us," James said of the game he was playing with Annabelle and his ma.  "Jillian will let us know when the foal is here."

"I can't."  He drew a deep breath as Jillian took her turn into the barn.  She'd been going in every twenty minutes and from his position he could see her stop well away from the stall.  She got in close enough to see her horse, make sure it didn't need her, and backed away quietly.

Pride filled him as she crept back outside, waved to him that all was right.  She'd been keeping an eye on Hope these last few weeks, as it was the mare's first foal.  She'd kept her close, tended to her like a mother over a child, ensuring she had the best food, the best care.  She'd been the first to notice that Hope seemed uncomfortable, that she kept getting up and down, that she wasn't interested in her food.  They'd moved her into the barn right away and she and Scott had taken their posts outside the barn.

James clapped Wade on the shoulder.  "Hope's in good hands."

"I know.  It's just-" he shook his head.  "So much is riding on this foal."

"It'll be fine.  Besides, if there's a problem, you won't have to wait for the vet to get here like last time."

Wade turned, met James' smile with one of his own.  "That was some night."

"Yeah, you got a wife because of that night, and Eileen and I got a house," he said referring to them moving into Jillian's house.

It was larger than the bunkhouse they'd planned on living in, it gave them privacy and it wasn't too far for James to ride in to work.  And, if Scott had his way, the now two empty bunkhouses would give a few new ranch hands somewhere to live.  But that wasn't happening soon.  There was debt yet.  Wade and Scott had had many discussions over the horse ranch and had agreed on the partnership the week following the fire at the feed mill.  But they'd agreed to build it slowly, so as not to increase the debt.  Although with Scott having bought half the ranch, the debt wasn't what it used to be.

"James, it's your turn," hi ma said.  As James went to take his turn, his ma took her place at her son's side.

"How're they doing?"

"Nothing's changed.  This waiting is going to kill me."

She chuckled, kissed his cheek.  "Reminds me of when Annabelle was born.  You were the same then, too.  As I imagine you'll be when you and Jillian decide to give me another grandchild."

Wade smiled.  He'd been considering doing exactly that.  He looked at Annabelle, her dark hair so much like her mother's and hoped his next child would also be blessed to have its mother's coloring.

He kissed his ma's cheek.  "We'll just have to see about that."

"In the meantime," she said, smiling as she looked out the window, "looks like I'll have to be happy with a foal."

Wade's head spun round.  Scott was waving from the barn.  Wade rushed for the door as the sound of chairs scraping the floor rang behind him.  They were a crazy group racing across the yard.

"Slow down, for God's sake, you don't want to scare them to death," Scott admonished, though his eyes glowed as bright as the lanterns.

With Scott leading the way, they crept into the barn.  Hope was still down.  Jillian was rubbing her hand over the foal's nose, but the sac had broken clean and the foal appeared to be fine.

"Congratulations," she said looking at him, then Scott.  "You have yourselves your first filly."

Wade's eyes drank in the sight of the filly and damn if Scott hadn't been right.  She was a beauty, exactly what their horse ranch needed.

Wade's gaze shifted to his wife's.  Jillian sat beside her horse, praising Hope for a job well done.  Her face shone with happiness.  Her eyes filled with love.

She was a beauty, Wade thought, as he looked upon his wife.

And she was exactly what he needed.