Read Anxious Love (Love Sick #1) Online
Authors: Sydney Aaliyah Michelle
I exhaled before noticing the people moving around me. People acknowledged me but didn't speak. They were on a mission, and from the looks on their frantic faces, they were on a time limit. I reached back and felt the wall and took an additional deep breath.
I'm okay
I'm okay
Ryan is okay.
"You okay, Ms. Leah."
My head snapped to my right, and Mr. Thibodeaux stood at the door. I peeked over his shoulder and noticed the crowded hallway. The swell of the people out there spilled into the pressroom. I flattened myself against the wall and smiled. "I think so."
He handed me a bottle of water, and I uncapped it and took a sip.
"Here," he said as he tapped a chair. "Sit here."
I climbed into the chair and took another sip. My mind was surprisingly blank. I felt the anxiety physically but not in my brain. It was an eerie feeling. Like my body knew this was wrong, being in the setting was wrong, but my mind didn't seem to care. I laughed a strange manic giggle and settled back into the seats.
My gaze fell on a young kid with blond hair like Ryan's. He was standing on the stage, testing microphones.
"1, 2, 3." He looked up and caught my gaze. He winked at me and continued with his work. "1, 2, 3."
My attention fell on the television as I felt the vibration of the crowd cheering through my system. The broadcast showed some of the team’s big plays as the teams ran off the field. A highlight of Ryan's interception return for a touchdown came on, and I bit my lip to keep from cheering. I wasn't supposed to be in here, but for some reason, I had the urge to stand on the podium and announce that my boyfriend was the one who caught that interception.
I giggled to myself.
The room filled up quick. I assumed it was the media waiting to pepper the team with questions. A spokesperson for the Saints stood at the podium first.
"We will start with Coach Stevens and then Michaels, Terry, Ware, and Randall."
The guy read a few more statistics from the game until Coach Stevens interrupted him.
Coach Stevens was a short man with balding gray hair and glasses. He kept rubbing his forehead. From his demeanor, you would never guess his team had won the game.
"Yep. Good start. Good win. We have some things to work on. Offense needs to get better. Defense had some good stops. Yep. Good win."
He continued to answer question after question in this manner until he got bored and excused himself. The other players spent ten minutes at the podium answering similar versions of the same questions. They all gave similar answers. Answers that reflected each player’s personality. Michaels, captain of the defense, was a strict, charmless guy, as Ryan referred to him, and answered the questions with no amusement. Terry was a second-year wide receiver. At six-foot-four and two hundred pounds of muscle, he wore a black custom-made suit. No way could a suit bought off the rack fit his frame that good. He added a little more flair to the answers.
When Ryan entered the room from the left of the stage, I grinned from ear to ear. He searched for me and grinned back.
"Ryan, how did you enjoy your welcome to the NFL moment?" The whole room laughed. Ryan chuckled, his voice vibrating over the microphone. He rubbed the bandage on his nose and cringed.
"They didn't need to send a five guy welcome party." The crowd laughed out loud.
"Take us through the interception."
"You know that saying, right place, right time. I was in the wrong place at the right time. I was supposed to be on the other side of the play. I was as surprised as the rest of the team to have caught that ball."
He had the media eating out of the palm of his hands. They adored him.
He answered other questions in a similar way. With humor and humility. My pride grew along with something else. Lust. I missed him so much.
"So Ryan. We know you came to New Orleans right after the draft. You wanted to get acclimated to the city. How do you like New Orleans so far?"
"You know. It was important for me to come to a city and a team where I would feel a part of it from the beginning. That's what I had at Notre Dame, but everyone told me the NFL's a business, it's just a business. It is, but you know, the city has been great. I found a place to live. I found a good Irish Pub." The crowd laughed. "I found a girl..." He winked at me. "Yeah, New Orleans is home."
I imagined some weird
Notting Hill
moment when Julia Roberts’s character told all of London she was staying indefinitely while the crowd snapped photos of Hugh Grant’s character looking at her adoringly.
It didn't quite happen. A reporter asked a question about zone defense and the press conference was back on track.
Ryan smirked and finished the press conference.
"Leah."
I turned and found Sophie standing at my side.
"How did you get here?"
I jumped off the stool, wrapped my arms around Sophie’s torso, and hugged her tight. She squealed and hugged me back.
I looked over and saw Ryan exiting the stage. He was typing into his phone. My phone buzzed a second later.
Ryan: Tell Kori to take you to the player's entrance.
"Ryan wants us to meet him at the player's entrance."
Kori took Sophie's hand, and Sophie pulled me along by the waist. He walked fast with his head down. We had no option but to follow him.
The end of the hallway entered into a massive parking lot under the stadium. The spaces had several cars parked but with spaces between each. I spotted Ryan's SUV and spotted him coming out of another door. Watching him walk toward me, I got a good look at him in his own custom tailored light gray suit. The jacket lay smooth over his bulky frame and the slacks hung straight over his massive legs. He appeared smaller but no less intimidating.
My mouth went dry as he took long strides toward me. I didn't need to look for something solid to hold on to anymore. My something solid was standing in front of me, and I never felt more secure.
My something solid could hold me back.
The ibuprofen had kicked in, and the thrill of victory helped ease the pain, but once I saw Leah at the press conference, her grin beaming at me, all the pain went away. I was ready to confess my love for this woman in front of the entire world but figured that might be a little counterproductive. I mean like she said, she wasn't cured, but I was so proud to see her here and see her okay.
I pushed through the locker room to the player parking lot and found Leah standing at my SUV with Kori and Sophie.
I greeted Kori first.
"Now that was an NFL debut," Kori said as he hugged me and grinned. "Nice job, man."
"Thanks, man." I leaned over and hugged Sophie. "Hey, thanks for coming."
I didn't hear her response; I grabbed Leah's hand and held on tight. I needed to be with her, be near her, touch her, and hold on tight to make sure she didn't leave me, even though I was the one who walked out on her last time.
I wanted to find a quiet place with a locked door and tell her how much I loved her and needed her in my life and not let her out until she believed me.
"Your uncle and cousins said they would meet you at the house,” Kori said.
I groaned and turned to Leah. "Daniel and I were having everyone over to our place to celebrate."
She brought my hand to her lips and kissed it softly. "Let's go."
My eyes narrowed as she dropped my hand, opened the car door, and crawled in. Sophie and Kori climbed into the back. I watched her as I crossed the front of the car. I couldn't take my eyes off her. I slid into the driver’s seat. I turned the key in the ignition, backed out, put the car in gear, and grabbed her hand before driving, the whole time keeping one eye on her and one on the road.
She stared out the window. The radio barely audible, but she tapped out the beat of the song on my hand and bobbed her head slightly.
When we pulled into my apartment garage a few minutes later, we headed up to my apartment. I opened the door and let Kori and Sophie in. Leah followed them, but I pulled her back.
"You okay?"
She rolled her eyes and stared up. “Why do you keep asking me that?"
"Because..." I said with sarcasm. "I just want to know where you're at, anxiety level wise."
"What you mean like on a scale of one to ten, ten being catatonic with fear."
"Something like that."
"I am buzzing around a four."
"Ryan, the man." My uncle grabbed my shirt. He breathed beer breath in my face and pulled me in for a hug. "I am so proud of you, son."
"Hey, Ryan." My cousins came over to hug me and pull me in. Leah remained near the door but stepped inside. She had a hand on the wall, her eyes darting around the room, but not frantic, more taking it all in.
Daniel crossed over to her, and she leaned in as he kissed her on the cheek. They chatted while I greeted a few more of my family who had come to see me play.
"So that's your girl, huh?" my uncle asked.
"Yeah." I waved to her. "Leah."
She gave the wall another reassuring touch, pushed off, and took a direct path to me, her eyes only focusing on her destination. "Baby, this is my Uncle Derek. And these two are my cousins, Brady and AJ."
Uncle Derek reached out a tentative hand to Leah, and she took it and pulled him in for a hug instead. He hugged her back with a huge grin on his face.
"It so great meeting you. Ryan talks about you all the time," she said.
"It's nice to meet you, too. We missed you at the game?" Brady said, leaning into Leah for his hug. AJ followed.
"I know. I was working on some things, but I won't miss another one."
They all smiled down at her as she looked up.
"Seriously, why are all the Ware men like handsome giants? My neck is going to ache after being around this family."
They all laughed, and I grinned. Who knew my girl was so charming.
You did, you idiot.
Why do you think you fell for her in the first place?
I reached down and palmed the small of her back, my fingers sliding over the top of her ass. My cock reminded me why I fell for her.
"Food's ready on the patio, everyone," Daniel said from the door, and everyone moved in that direction.
We had a chef come in and prepare a traditional Creole dinner for us. He set out a long table on the patio and had the food in big bowls placed down the center. My entire family including Daniel, his parents, girlfriend, and sister surrounded the table. The food looked and smelled amazing.
I sat on one end of the long rectangle table and pulled Leah close to my side as we all dug in. The chef had prepared a traditional crawfish boil. He boiled crawfish, shrimp, corn, and potatoes and poured them all out onto the table covered in mugs of melted butter.
Sophie sat on Leah's left. We formed a protective barrier around her for the whole night. I wasn't sure she needed it, but she accepted it. I think it made us feel better. We all sat at the table and ate, drank, and laughed. It was perfect. Exactly how I pictured it.
The ghost of people who couldn't be here didn't take up any space. They were put to rest in my mind after the events of last week.
I looked over at Leah and smiled at her. I needed to pay a lot more attention to the people in my life and worry less about the people no longer with me.
As the chef and wait staff cleaned up, we all moved inside. Uncle Derek wanted to watch them talk about me on the evening news.
Leah walked in, but I stopped her. I pulled her to my side. The heat of her body made me groan. I missed touching her. I wasn't sure if my own issues of being with her would rear their ugly head, but at the moment, I wanted her so bad. I didn't care. "You know, if we snuck off, I don't think they would care."
"This party is for you."
"I know, but I really need to be alone with you."
"Really?"
I leaned over, captured her lip between my teeth, and sucked on it. "Really."
I grabbed her hand and slid out the back door that led straight into the hallway from the patio.
"Shit." I stopped, pawing my pockets. "I left my keys in the house."
"Let's order a car."