Any Way the Wind Blows (32 page)

Basil sent me the tapes, and I called Ava to let her know I had them. The conversation was an Ava special, and she yelled, hollered and called me all kinds of names. She told me I didn’t have the sense God gave a goose, and reminded me she knew where all the bodies were buried. I knew she was talking about Madison, so I sent her a copy of the
Essence
article and copies of the tapes, and enclosed a little warning that the masters were now in
my
hands. Still, nothing gave me more satisfaction than finally getting in the last word with Ava. I said, “I bet you’re having second thoughts now about trying to be my friend rather than my mother.”

“You’re such a bitch,” Ava screamed.

“Thank you. I learned from the best,” I said as I hung up the phone, with the knowledge I’d also learned some lessons from people like Basil, Desmond and Windsor that Ava could never teach me.

A
fter Warden Wylie releases me, I’ve got big plans. I’m going to buy me a used car and travel across the United States and see what I can learn about this country and myself. I plan to visit Cleveland and maybe look up Hattie, and then West to California. I think Hollywood might be interested in the stories I can tell.

Spending so much time with Wylie has not been the ocean of time I imagined. I’ve actually learned some things about the public relations business. Wylie suggested I read a book called
The Personal Touch
by this sister named Terrie Williams, and I picked up a few things about life and business. I’m also seriously thinking about finishing up my education, ’cause this body ain’t going to last forever.

Nothing much about my day-to-day friendship with Wylie has changed. Well that’s not totally true. He makes me work and I make him go to the gym. He’s lost about twenty pounds and if he keeps it up, we might wind up competing for male attention. We still laugh a lot and he hasn’t turned me into a saint. And quite frankly, I think Wylie likes it that way.

I still have a lot of questions about my life, and whenever I’m searching for answers, Wylie quickly shares some wise saying his mother told him or something from the Bible.

One day when I was musing over why I’d met people like Basil and Ava, Wylie quoted me some scripture and told me to read John 3:8. I looked it up and found: “The wind blows wherever it pleases. You hear its sound, but you cannot tell where it comes from or where it is going. So it is with everyone born of the Spirit.” Wylie told me he thought it meant that people come into our lives for different reasons, good and bad, and if you’re in the Spirit, you can survive anyone and anything. I don’t know if I believe that or not, but it’s probably one of the reasons Wylie has remained my friend.

A few weeks ago, Wylie took me to see August Wilson’s
King Hedley II
, on Broadway. I was enjoying the play and leaned over and whispered, “Thanks for being my friend, Wylie. Thanks for showing me tough love and not giving up on me.” The old lady sitting in front of us turned around and shushed me. It was a normal reaction for me to shout, “Bitch, don’t shush me.” She was so startled, she huffed her way out of the theatre. I looked at Wylie, ready for him to tell me how wrong I was, but instead he just burst out laughing and said, “I guess you told her.” We were laughing so hard I was surprised they didn’t kick us out of the theatre.

At that moment I realized I had spent my life looking for love that could never be true and missed things that were right in front of my eyes: a good laugh, words that make you think (even lines from the B-I-B-L-E) and friendship. That’s all love, all the time.

A
ny man who doesn’t respect a woman after watching her give birth isn’t a man. The new love of my life was born today: a beautiful baby girl, Talley Alexandria Henderson, weighing in at 6 pounds, 3 ounces. With just one look at Talley, I knew she was mine. I can tell already she’s going to be a heartbreaker, and the first heart she’ll break will be mine, her daddy’s.

There’s no way to describe the way I felt watching her come into the world. I felt humble. I felt scared. It was an amazing event that covered my body with a chill as cold as winter, and then when I heard her scream, I felt a warmth that felt like the sun was shining just on me and my daughter. When Rosa, with tears streaming down her face, passed Talley to me and I looked into the baby’s face, I cried, but this time the tears that streamed down my face were tears of pride and joy. This crying thing ain’t that bad after all. I know I might be alone again in my life, but I will never be lonely. The girl I’ve been waiting for has finally arrived.

Raymond was right: One person can alter your life
forever when you least expect it. It was finally time to embrace life and never question where or to whom it might lead.

I’ve learned that you have to be able to flow. Any way the wind blows is cool with me.