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Authors: Katie Fforde

BOOK: Artistic Licence
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‘No. I only am because I needed the loo. I’ll go back to sleep in a minute.’

Thea looked at him over the rim of the bath. ‘Toby, tell me if you hate this idea, but supposing I just lie back down here and shut my eyes. Could you still pee? Or would you be embarrassed?’

Toby bit his lip and thought. ‘That’ll be OK.’

Thea burrowed down into her musty heap of cloth and went back to sleep.

*

She was woken again and realised Susan had let herself in the back door. It was eleven o’clock. There didn’t seem to be any indication that anyone else was stirring. She climbed out of the bath and wondered how to prevent Susan from knowing what it had been used for. She settled on piling up everything in the corner and getting it stuffed back into the airing cupboard while Susan was in the kitchen. She went to say hello. ‘Hi, Susan. Lara had her puppies last night.’

Susan’s expression was radiant. ‘Did she? How lovely? Where are they?’

‘In front of the fire in the sitting room. Not really a good idea, but where else would there be room?’

Lara banged her tail hard on the floor, pleased to have her puppies admired.

‘I told Rory he ought to be thinking about where she was to have them,’ said Susan. ‘They look so tiny, don’t they? I don’t suppose the father could have been very big.’

‘One still got stuck, though,’ said Thea and was about to tell Susan about Ben’s gallant midwifery when she remembered Susan didn’t yet know about Ben, or any of the others.

‘Look at that little one.’ Susan pointed to the runt. ‘I doubt he’ll survive long.’

Thea instantly felt tears prick her eyes. Short of sleep, she was in no mood to be adult and realistic about the chances of tiny puppies. Hopelessly sentimental, she wanted that puppy to live and thrive even more than all the others. ‘Are you sure?’ Susan was a country girl. She was bound to have experience of these little matters of life and death.

‘Not sure. But he is little and you should probably –’

‘Lara made a bit of a mess, I’m afraid,’ Thea broke in before Susan could tell her to bump the puppy on the head. ‘And one of the pups, that big one, with markings like a killer whale, was breech. Ben had to deliver it.’

Susan turned away from the little balloons which lay in a row by Lara’s huge side. ‘Ben? Who’s Ben?’

Perhaps now was as suitable a moment as any to tell Susan about the great visitation. ‘Ben’s – Ben arrived last night, with some other people.’

Susan regarded Thea as if she’d had some kind of fit.

‘Let’s make tea and I’ll explain.’

‘OK,’ said Susan getting up and going into the kitchen. ‘Oh. There don’t seem to be any tea bags.’

‘Ben is some kind of relation of Molly’s. Molly is a friend of mine and Petal’s aunt. And Toby’s Ben’s son.’

‘So Ben is the one who used to be head of an art college and likes Rory’s paintings?’

‘More or less. They didn’t need to come in person and certainly not all of them. I spent ages taking slides.’ It was important that Susan didn’t think she was particularly pleased by the invasion.

‘And they’re all asleep? Here?’

Thea nodded.

‘Mother of God, where did you find to put them?’

Chapter Eight

While Susan was tidying the kitchen, Toby appeared. He looked sweet and rumpled, and endearingly like his father.

‘Hi, Toby. Did you sleep all right?’ Thea decided to ignore their earlier meeting.

‘Hi. I’m glad someone’s up at last. I’ve been in bed reading for ages.’

‘Well, I suppose you didn’t go to bed as late as everyone else. Come and see the pups.’

Toby knelt down respectfully at Lara’s side. ‘Look at that little tiny one,’ he said.

Thea swallowed. ‘He may not live very long. But he’s my favourite.’

‘Mine too,’ Toby agreed.

Ben came into the room, dressed, but only half awake. Seeing him with his hair adrift made Thea put up her hand to her own. She discovered it had curled into knots at the base of her neck where it had got wet in the bath and badly needed brushing. She clawed at it with her fingers.

‘Hello, Thea. Hi, Tobe. Admiring the puppies? The little one’s still with us, I see.’

‘That’s mine and Thea’s favourite,’ said Toby firmly.

Ben gave Thea a look which told her never to lie to children about the chances of tiny puppies surviving.
She looked back, trying to indicate that she hadn’t. ‘Has Lara been out yet?’ he asked, when this silent altercation was over.

‘She hasn’t stirred,’ Thea answered.

‘She should get out and relieve herself and she’ll need breakfast, too.’

Thea opened the front door and called Lara. She wagged her tail but didn’t move.

‘You need something tasty to bribe her with,’ Ben told her.

‘Let’s see what we can find in the kitchen and you can meet Susan. Susan, this is Ben and this is Toby. This is Susan. She looks after Rory.’

‘Morning, gentlemen,’ said Susan. Her smile was equivocal, not enthusiastic, but not hostile either.

‘We need some food to make Lara go out,’ said Thea. ‘What is there?’

‘Precious little.’ Susan opened the fridge and peered inside. ‘Precious little for you folks’ breakfast, either.’

‘There must be something Lara likes. A bit of cheese, perhaps?’ Thea knew there was cheese because she’d bought it herself.

‘There’s half a rasher of bacon she might as well have, as it won’t feed a person.’ Susan handed it to Ben.

He went over to where Lara lay. There were five little balloons and a sausage, where before there had been six little sausages. The runt, though still alive, hadn’t filled out in the night like the others.

‘It’s a good sign that he hasn’t died, isn’t it?’ Thea asked.

Ben looked down at her but didn’t speak. Thea felt like Toby must when his father had bad news.

‘OK,’ she went on. ‘It’s nature’s way. If he dies it’s
for a reason.’

She delivered the lecture to herself in a voice that was brittle with the effort of keeping away the tears. She was short of sleep and nervy, and wondered if somehow she was suffering from some kind of referred post-natal depression, but decided not to mention it in case she found herself locked up for lunacy.

‘Come on, Lara, look what I’ve got for you.’ Ben angled the bacon in front of her nose and she reared up to sniff it. Holding it out of her reach, he lured her to the front door, got her outside and only then let her have the bacon. Seeing she was about to bolt back, Thea shut the door.

Through the window she saw Lara squat down, and then have a sniff about before charging back towards the door, demanding to be let in.

‘Her food’s in that sack, over there,’ said Susan.

Ben inspected the sack in the disapproving way parents inspect boxes of cereal which are much advertised on television, with free toys in them. ‘She may need something with a bit more protein now she’s got pups to feed.’

‘You may all need something with a bit more protein in it, if you want breakfast,’ said Susan, who had a more pragmatic attitude to animals than Thea and Ben did.

‘Is anyone else up?’ asked Ben, when he’d fed Lara.

‘No and no sign that they’ll be up soon.’ Thea had put her ear to the keyhole and heard Molly’s familiar snore, but nothing from Petal.

‘You’ve got two eggs, one and a half tomatoes, and half a loaf of bread,’ persisted Susan, determined to
keep Thea’s mind on the job.

Thea wanted to creep back to her bath. ‘I don’t suppose Molly will want a cooked breakfast,’ she began.

‘Rory will,’ said Susan.

Ben turned to Thea. ‘Can you drive Rory’s Land Rover?’

‘I expect so.’ But she wasn’t keen. If it were a matter of life and death she wouldn’t have hesitated, but not if it were just a matter of eggs and cornflakes. Oh, and freshly squeezed orange juice for Petal.

‘OK,’ said Ben, seeing her lack of enthusiasm. ‘We’ll walk to the pub and fetch Molly’s car. Then you can come with us and show me where the shops are.’

Thea felt unreasonably excited at the prospect of abandoning her sleeping, uninvited guests. Perhaps running away from people was becoming a habit. ‘Susan, just tell anyone who appears that we’ve gone to buy breakfast,’ she said gaily.

‘You’d better buy lunch while you’re there,’ Susan told her. ‘It’s getting on for one o’clock already.’

The air was damp and chill on Thea’s cheeks, refreshing and invigorating. It felt wonderful to be outdoors, in the light and air. The sun was a silver disc behind the clouds reflecting silver on the water. It was like moonlight but without the darkness. The islands rose from the sea like benign sea monsters getting the sun on their backs.

She gazed at the view for a few moments while Ben found the keys and then got Toby settled in the back of the car. ‘It is a lovely spot,’ she said happily as Ben adjusted the front seat for his long legs.

‘Yes.’

‘Very inspiring for an artist, don’t you think?’

Ben shrugged. ‘I have yet to see the artist’s work so I can’t comment on his source of inspiration.’

Thea wanted to click her teeth, roll her eyes and say, ‘Oo, la di da!’ like Petal and her chums did, in similar situations. Perhaps Ben wasn’t a morning person.

Toby sat silent in the back. To Thea, who had no experience of children, he seemed quiet and thoughtful for one so young. She glanced round to look at him, but he seemed quite happy, looking out of the window.

Toby wasn’t the only one to be quiet during the drive into town. Thea wanted to enjoy this moment of peace, knowing there would be none when they got back, and Ben was probably tired. He must be a little anxious in case this expedition was for nothing. He’d rearranged his entire holiday. If Rory hadn’t fulfilled his potential it would be a dreadful waste of his and Toby’s time.

Thea found Toby extremely useful in the supermarket. He knew what he and his father liked to eat, and was good at finding things, like fresh orange juice and Greek yoghurt for Molly and Petal, and croissants for Thea who felt she deserved a treat. ‘He’s a very efficient shopper,’ she said to Ben as Toby spotted the dog food aisle and ran off.

‘We neither of us like it much, so we get it done quickly.’

Thea didn’t usually like shopping much either, but she had been enjoying this amble round an unfamiliar shop, looking at the different things that were available in Ireland. ‘Oh, look,’ she said, her spirits
dampened by Ben’s lack of pleasure, ‘cooked chickens. I’ll get one for lunch.’

The dog food in the supermarket deemed inappropriate by Ben, they found a shop selling everything any farmer could want, from barbed wire to Barbour jackets. It also sold large bags of dog food, one of which was ‘for nursing bitches’.

Toby and Thea found dried pigs’ ears, looking pathetically like their undried origins. Suddenly remembering that Toby was a vegetarian, Thea wished she hadn’t drawn his attention to them.

‘Sorry, Toby, I forgot you didn’t eat meat, you probably think these are gross.’

‘It’s all right. I don’t like meat myself, but Dad has explained that if no one ate it there’d be no animals in fields and stuff.’

‘Quite right. Shall we get one of these for Lara?’

‘Yeah. She deserves a treat. But what if she doesn’t like pigs’ ears?’

‘I expect she will,’ said Ben. ‘Shall we go? Our parking ticket will run out.’

‘And the others will be up and starving,’ added Thea.

‘And Lara,’ Toby reminded them.

Just for a moment Thea wished the others and Lara didn’t exist, and the three of them could poke around the pretty riverside town at their leisure. Although Ben would probably hate it.

There had been a slight tussle at the checkout. Ben had got out his wallet, assuming he was going to pay, but Thea had got in first. Her argument was that as they were all there because of her, the least she could do was buy breakfast. Ben had regarded her as if she
were a rare species that he’d heard about but never thought to see. While this gave Thea a warm feeling for a moment, she reflected later that he would probably brand her a rampant feminist and cross his fingers whenever he saw her.

They got back just as Rory came out of his bedroom. He was bare-chested and his lean, lightly muscled torso disappeared into a slender waist and flat stomach. A narrow band of dark hair led from his chest to the waistband of his jeans, where it disappeared. His arms were tanned and the hairs on his forearms were bleached by the sun. He yawned and brought his arms up behind his head. Thea saw Petal observe this from across the room and they exchanged glances. Yummy, they both thought.

Their moment of concord was swiftly over as Rory said, ‘Hello, everyone. Jaysus, I’ve a headache!’

‘So have I,’ said Petal plaintively. ‘Has anyone got any paracetamol.’

‘Why are there no aspirins in the jungle?’ said Toby to himself. ‘Because the parrots eat ’em all.’

Diverted from Petal and Rory, Thea turned to Toby. ‘I like that.’

‘I didn’t make it up. I heard it from someone at school.’

Thea nodded. ‘Well, I expect Molly’s got something for headaches. We’ve brought fresh orange juice for hangovers and all sorts of other things besides.’

Now, Molly emerged from the bathroom, looking ready for whatever the day might bring. She was perfectly made up and her hair was tonged and brushed. Thea realised she must have got up the
minute they left for her to be looking like this now.

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