Ashes and Ice (16 page)

Her giddy giggles continue. She mouths “stop”, but the words don’t quite come out so I ignore them and tickle ruthlessly, relishing her uncontrolled, unrelenting smile because I know I am the cause of it.

Before I know what she is doing, I feel her legs snake around me and then pull me into her, our bodies perfectly aligning on top of one another. A kick of adrenaline courses through me. I stop laughing. She still shakes with the laughter that doesn’t lose grip of her. Here we are, me on top, her legs wrapped around me. I feel hollow, excited, happy, and nervous. We’ve never been like this before—in this forbidden position, and I can’t keep the thoughts of the desires within me from clouding my mind.

She is still giggling. She is so innocent. Guilt nags at me for feeling this way. But the adrenaline still sends waves through me, taunting some brave soul within me and I want to kiss her. I want to kiss her and recant my stupidity from yesterday. I want to kiss her and tell her I do like her, but not like Dominic—I like her so much more than that. I love her. And I want her to choose me. I start to lean in closer to her, the strength within me taking charge.

A man clears his throat at the door.

I’m startled and my head snaps up. It’s Wade. Dammit.

He’s leaning on the doorway, looking at us with lazy, but amused eyes. “Atta boy, Connor.” He winks. “Didn’t know you had it in you.”

I want to sit up, but Jade’s legs are still around me and she is too strong. I would have to flinch away and that would be obvious.

“But in terms of the general order of events,” he says, “first you lock the door.” He points to the door, “and second—”

I already know what he is going to say. I close my eyes to brace myself and try to plead with him to shut up, “Wa—”

He doesn’t wait for me to finish, “And second, your clothes have to come off sometime or this whole thing won’t work too well.”

I hang my head in embarrassment and shame. Am I seriously related to this guy? Is it genetically possible? I look at Jade.

She’s confused—her brow is furrowed, lips pursed, her eyes nearly blinking a neon question mark. And I am relieved. But then a flicker of understanding brightens her eyes and her whole face turns serious. Her legs let go of me as she sits up, shaking her head. “Oh no, Uncle Wade.” She glances at me quickly, “Connor doesn’t like me like that at all.” Her lips tighten and she looks away from me as she stands up.

Wade raises an eyebrow. Now he’s confused.

“I—I better go.”She looks flustered and shuffles around Wade as if she’s scared to touch him.

“Nice job, Wade.” I say and he shrugs his shoulders and smirks.

The girl’s blue lips smack open and closed. “
Imppprrroooobesss es.
”

“What?” She’s too ugly to look at; I want to vomit. My lungs heave, trying to keep the bile down.

The foreign words tumble from her lips in a throaty, vacant sound. Her mouth opens and closes almost mechanically. But she drags out the “es”. I press myself against the wall. She reaches one white, trembling hand toward me.

“What do you want?”

“
Improbus es
.”

“What?”

“
ImprobusesImprobusesImprobusesImprobusesImprobuses
…” Her bloody toes scratch at the wood, her black tongue flops in her mouth.

Is this it? Is this death? Am I ready? I clench my teeth, preparing myself.

Her hand collides with my chest, burning me. It sears into my skin like a knife. I grab at her arm, but it doesn’t move. Fingers splayed, palm on my chest, she lifts me up, my back dragging against the wall. The pain stretches from my chest to my back, from the base of my throat to my belly.

“ImprobusesImprobusesImprobusesImprobusesImprobuses…”

“Please,” I say, breathless. “Please, stop.” My head spins from the pain. Consciousness slips away from me and as it does, so does she. As soon as I hit the bed, the fog and the girl are gone. Where she stood, a pile of ash lies in a heap on the floor. My skin burns. I touch my chest and feel thick, gaping cuts across my chest. I run to my mirror.

The cuts in the shapes of letters are deep and ugly.

“
Improbus es
.” I will tears to come, but they don’t.

Blackness pulls me under. When I wake up, I run to the mirror. The words are gone.

I have to find the red door. Time is running out.

Jade looks nervous and I can’t tell why.

“Ah, you are looking for it then.” She narrows her eyes at Jade. “Why?”

“I, well, I was just curious…” Jade being flustered makes me shift my weight, makes me nervous and I want to get out of here.

“Come here.” Alathea says abruptly. She pivots around and disappears behind a rack of books, candles and alligator skulls.

Jade glances at me and raises her eyebrows before following her.

I want to scream at her, I want to drag her out of the shop, but instead I follow too, dragging my feet on the wood floor, watching the dust part and leave my trail.

Around the corner, we see the lady sitting at a low table, candles glowing around her, casting her sharp angular face in shadows and light.

She looks at the floor near Jade’s feet. “What card chose you.”

“What?” Jade asks.

The lady nods to the floor and in a bird like gesture tilts her head to the side and watches as Jade bends down to pick up a card at her feet.

“Um, I don’t know. It’s blank.”

Alathea’s eyes grow wide and she crooks a finger at Jade. “Come here.”

I peer over Jade’s shoulder and see the whiteness of the card stare back at me. What the hell was it doing at her feet?

Jade doesn’t move for a second. Slowly, she approaches her. “Ah, yes. You are the little-jade-eyed child, aren’t you?” The old woman smiles, teeth blackened, some missing. “He’s been waiting for you.”

“What? Who’s waiting?” I say, confused.

The old hag’s stare trips on itself, tumbles on me, and promptly turns into a glare as if she just noticed my intrusion. She shifts her gaze back to Jade and softens, never answering my question.

“Little one, you have been empty for so long haven’t you?”

Jade gasps. “I—”

“Girl with nothing to cling to or reach for, no heart to love with, no soul to protect.”

Jade stifles a sound. I look over at her and see a pained expression on her face. I don’t like it.

“Alathea—” I say, before she cuts me off.

“But you are much more than what you seem, young one. You must go to him now, because they are all coming for you.” She leans in closer. “The blackness cannot win.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Jade is shaking and I wrap an arm around her. “Leave her alone. Can’t you see you are freaking her out?”

“Sh, sh, sh.” Her attention flicks to me. “Oh yes, you have a part to play too, young man. Come here.” She motions me forward, I shake my head, but Jade moves away from my arm and pushes me. I feel like I have been thrown to the wolves, or in this case, thrown to a weirdo psychic lady who looks like she could make me alligator bait. I can’t believe my feet are actually marching their way toward her. As I come toward her reluctantly, she asks me to take three cards. When I do, she takes them from me and arranges them slowly on her table.

“Such a bright soul.” She looks at Jade for a moment, “But of course you know that, right child?” She returns her gaze to the cards. “Oh how your heart will hurt, young man. So many roads will lead to your demise.” Sadness crosses her face as she looks up at me.

“Demise?” I say.

She pushes a card forward. It has swords piercing a heart and much blood. “Death.” She lets the word hang in the air.

Holy crap. Either I was slipped a pill at lunch or this old lady is batshit crazy. Seriously, if a person owns a collection of skulls and has mastered a peel-your-skin-off-glare, she is no one I want to tango with. “Jade, let’s go.” I tug on her arm.

“Wait.” Jade wrenches her arm away and steps closer to the wrinkly, feral-eyed woman.

Did my jaw just unhinge? “Jade, I—”

“I have to hear what she has to say…”

“Are you freaking serious? I’ll pay for a hand reading somewhere else, you know, at another non-let-me-trap-you-in-my-basement-and-wait-till-your-skin-rots-off-so-I-can-display-you-in-my-bone-collection-kind-of-place. You know, like on the street, in public, with witnesses?”

Instead of responding, Jade shuffles closer to Alathea.

The old lady rushes forward and puts her palms on either side of Jade’s face. “There is very little hope for you. But you must find him. Now.”

“Find who?” I say, no answer greets me.

“Don’t taste. Don’t taste them. It will ruin everything. Be strong and don’t believe everything you see, and don’t give into the cold. The ice wants you back, but it can’t take you. You are ours.”

Jade is shaking again, her hands turning white under Alathea’s tight grasp. Alathea looks desperate, hungry, and doesn’t let go of Jade’s gaze.

“Let’s go, Jade.” I pull her away from Alathea. Her skin is hot and slick with sweat.

“Now, go.” Alathea ushers us out the door and slams it closed behind us. She eyes the street before flipping the sign to “CLOSED”.

“Wow. What the hell was that about?”

Jade blinks up at me, before staring off into the distance. “I, I don’t know.”

***

Jade’s distant eyes and twitchiness worry me.

I mean, I am a bit twitchy myself. Some old hag said I was going to die. That’s no picnic. But Jade looks lost and vulnerable and I want to distract her from whatever thoughts are weighing her down. We are washing the dishes in the kitchen and a fleeting thought bounces into my head: mom and dad used to wash dishes together. They also used to…

I smirk and hold the sink hose in one hand. “Hey, Jade?”

Her sad eyes look at me and, in one rash movement, I drench her with the hose.

The look of pure shock—wide eyes and mouth gaping open—is worth the pot of water she dumps over my head.

Before I know it, I am chasing her down the hallway, her giggles a musical sound in the air. I chase her and we end up in the bathroom. With a hard shove, she pushes me into the shower stall, unlatches the showerhead and sprays me until no part of me is dry. I grab her wrists and haul her forward and now we are both under the stream of water. I tickle her ruthlessly and she slumps against me and we both topple to the floor of the stall. My stomach aches because of the laughter. I don’t think she notices when I stop tickling her, when I wrap my arms around her and pull her closer to me.

“Oh! Nanan!”

I turn towards the door and Connor catches my hand. His touch is soft and sweet—like a promise. I’m startled by it, because for a moment he doesn’t say anything. A smile tugs at his lips.

I walk downstairs. Desi stands at the half-closed door, talking quietly with the person behind it. I would be so happy if Nanan and Desi became friends. Desi looks up at me and gives a polite smile. Polite smile? That falters my step. A polite smile isn’t a real one.

“Well, here she is.” She opens the door wider and standing in the doorway is the hulking figure of Dominic.

I freeze. What is he …

“Why the hell is he here?” Connor’s voice yells from behind me.

“Connor, don’t talk like that to a visitor.”

Connor lets out a sharp exhale. “A visitor?”

“For Jade.” Desi says.

Connor stiffens behind me. “But…”

Desi moves away from the door. “C’mon Connor, let’s give them some privacy.”

Privacy? I don’t want privacy with this slimy boy.

A touch on my elbow. I look to it and the hand then face attached to it. “Do you…”

“I got this, Connor.” I say to him, wanting to ease the tension .

“Okay, but I’ll be in the next room if you need me. All right?”

I nod, knowing I won’t ask for his help. I cannot always lean on him. I am stronger than he thinks, stronger than I want to think.