Ashes To Ashes (Wolf Guard Book 2) (2 page)

Chapter 1

The darkest nights hide many things. Those that sneak beneath the shadows and make midnight a playground for the maladjusted, those that prey on weaker creatures like the moon that loses it light to the brighter sun. I believe nights are better spent dreaming, hours that pass in fantasy, a beautiful lie of greater things.

Within this blackness I sat, in a cemetery that holds statues of the fallen, pieces of marble to stand over old graves and guard the dead as they rested. Perhaps in some other life I’d have spent the evening running, let go of such civilization and fallen into that wild freedom. Instead I reminisce on the people I'd buried. Two old souls that now slept together - a permanent bed for the lovers that joined each other in death as if they'd refused to leave life as a single entity.

The service had been short and meagerly attended. I hadn't expected much else though it would have been nice for their deaths to have meant more than they had. Maybe a crowd to congregate and acknowledge the hearts of the people who'd passed. They'd been my solid connection to peace - something easy and simple when my life had turned brutal and I'd liked to have given them something more than just the silver offer of payment towards their send off.

The wind blew a chilling draft through the hair that warmed my neck. It circled my skin and swept up towards my face, a soft breeze that brought a cold front directly from the north and it's Siberian freeze. Usually, the Atlantic pushed it's weather our way but the change in direction brought a colder spell that challenged even the wolf's burning blood. The moon's appearance had taken the day's clear heat and I'd not moved since early afternoon, sitting on grey stone steps ten feet from the freshly packed hole in the hallowed grounds. Some day I'd sit here and smile at the headstone, one that laments the same sorrow that rises every so often in my chest, some kind of tide that rushes the surface in an unexpected surge. Today, I'd only remember how angry I'd become. Only fume at injustices I’d done nothing to prevent.

The funeral was a gift from an old friend - a collection of favours owed. How I wished it could have been something else,
anything
else, I’d needed. 

Pictures flicker from the night I'd found them, only three short days ago. Ty had met me at the door, inside a house so covered in shadows it had felt as though some great force was preventing my admittance, something that created a barrier at the boundary, a small pressure on the skin's surface that the wolf had prowled in unease at.

He’d swept around my frozen body, willingly entering a room that I'd been working my way up to, glaring at my foot to take that first excruciating step. He'd blocked my view at first, his large body like the sun that blinds until the shadows take power once more. A single breath of pure, lighted freedom before the darkest chains came rattling down.

His step to the side had brought hell. As if demons had broken the surface and run amok among humans. Carnage had wrapped around my vision, a cage of containment that froze the wolf in stilled panic.

The flowery sofa that I'd hated with a passion had been stained in some odd shade of rust. Blood that dried and stiffened fabric into a murky red and sank into cushioned seats as if escaping the horror that made it. Torn flesh that parted at the seams and gaped in agony, showing a frozen image of what massacre had arrived and gleefully cleaved the insides out of these people I'd known. People that had taken a girl in and shown her how to build a life from the waste she'd been left with.

I'd flicked my gaze to the wall and the splatters of blood that painted over the pale blue - the colour the room had been for as long as I could remember. The lamp overturned in the corner, the bulb smashed to cast glittering glass over the worn carpet. The coffee table I'd marked with my refusal to use a coaster, broken in pieces against the far wall. The armchair that Michael had always sat in - his own weight a permanent imprint on the sagging stuffing - cut into ribbons of flowers that fell artfully in a pattern of terror. 

I felt tears rising, ones that tried hard to over-spill and give my anger and hate free reign on the rest of the world. Not pain at what scenes I remember, never that. I hated and it grew within me, spun illusions of the justice I'd take, showing me flickering pictures of all the cleaving of my own I'd do. I had liked these people and I would burn the world to the ground to find the animal who'd done this.

A heavy tread crunched the gravel behind me."You good, Sash?" Ty asked, almost quietly for once.

I nodded and swallowed around the smell that lingered even so many days later. "Yeah, I'm good."

"We need to leave soon, it'll be light in an hour or so."

"I know." He'd returned to the house while I'd sat in some weak kind of numbness turning all my failures around in my head. "Did you get anything?"

"Not much, a little bit of wolf but nothing much else. There seems to be residual joy hanging around as if they'd been manically happy about killing."

He'd picked up something I hadn't. My wolf generally overpowered that side of me, more dominant than the smaller, more deeply buried side that hungered for things other than chasing rabbits and running through the woods. I scowled at the thought - that whoever had done this had enjoyed it so much.

I wonder if they'll be so joyful when I catch up to them.

We’d spent most of our lives alone, coming back to this town only so I could visit these people that now sat in shallow graves. This was some wolf’s fatal error, a clock ticked slowly on countdown, measuring only the short time he had left to live. Ty sat his bulk beside me, the usual scent of freshly cut grass wafting from his direction. I don't think I'd ever tire of his smell, the comfort he exudes even with just his simple presence. What a casual light he emits, some soft glow that creates a beacon in this blank darkness.

His words whispered in the silent cemetery, "what about you?"

I'd yet to tell him my thoughts, three days had been an especially long time to go without talking to him. I'd spent enough time in my own head though, it was a place becoming entirely too sinister. "Smelt like rain to me." The summer shower kind, one that comes after a heatwave to cleanse the earth with lighting streaks and rolling thunder.

Ty hummed in thought. He hadn't picked up much of a personal scent, that wasn't unusual though - he was a touch too other for his wolf to have such remarkable senses. "We'll have to check in with the Alpha."

I actually laughed slightly at that and a warmth grew in my chest chasing that suffocating tide away a little. "Sounds great." I was lying of course - it sounded awful. We'd had enough run-ins with that Alpha and I was tired of his bigotry, he was old enough to be stuck in his ways, a wolf that thought the sun rose and set with his command.

"He won't admit to wolves being in town that night but maybe we can get close enough for you to catch that scent again."

Maybe. It was worth a try, anything was better than the nothing we currently had. I fell into silence once more, staring at the headstone and the words that became blurred in my focus. I could see well enough in such empty darkness - the animal paced close to the surface and her vision was without equal. Her rumbles of displeasure vibrated the bones of my ribs, making sure I understood her position, showing the human what the wolf promised to achieve - death to the culprit and a torturous one at that. She was a conniving soul, perhaps one perfectly suited for me. We had a fluid relationship, a bond that grew early and in such synchronicity that it even included that extra part of us both - the little piece of raven jewel that hid beneath the satin gold.

I turned towards Ty's ice, blue eyes, illuminating in such a starless sky. He had gotten himself a sister in the years we'd survived together - not biologically but siblings regardless. I hoped this wouldn't be our last crusade, that at the end, when all had fallen into harsh light and our secrets exposed for all to see, that we remain standing. My feeder stirred within its bindings, secure straps of twisted metal that locked iron bars around an entity that proved its worth with each passing season.

Over forty years ago, the Alpha had refused the feeder admittance to the pack, banished wolves so young to the wild. Now the pack will meet the wolf they’d forgotten - leak that sickly, sweet fragrance of fear she likes so much - understand that in the face of such perfect cohesion between several parts of the same well oiled machine, they'd lose a swiftly decided battle.

I stood from the step turned ice cold in those Siberian winds. One last look on the marble that heralded a final resting place. "Come on, let's find somewhere."

Ty nodded and followed as I walked the path to the large wrought iron gates. We needed a place to stay for the night, our usual was now covered in death..

Rain like showers in the summer. It had been some perfect mix of storm and sun.

Chapter 2

I could almost taste the hunger in the air. Some primitive call of the untamed. Savage satisfaction for a nature that sings its proud song to me.

That utter weightlessness of flying high - unhindered by all that sits on shoulders like great marble headstones - unbreakable and immovable to a common man.

Perhaps I’m selfishly snowed under by crimes that shouldn’t be mine to solve. Hounded by deaths I feel bound in chains to give closure to. And so I long for that moment, just the chance to break away from this grisly cycle. 

Until then I suppose I'd have to live this life, the one that says I'm beholden to past mistakes and future remedies. That I'd have to put my own path on hold while I chased some others satisfaction and ensured some others dues are paid. I couldn't begrudge Michael or Sarah their payment only, sometimes I find myself wishing for that freedom - one without this constant circle of doom that only gives me tiny moments of pleasure. Find, chase, repeat. It seems a continual thing, a never ending pattern of bodies and new leads that eventually becomes nothing but more bodies. It’s unnaturally tiring, a worn down kind of tired that is probably evident beneath my plastered-on smile.

I sat facing Ty, his always present smug little smile twitching on full lips. Those deep, blue eyes sparkling as he watched passers-by through the window to the right of us. Our cushioned booth was slightly dented, years of custom creating a smooth dip in the foam, giving us a semblance of privacy in the old cafe. Steaming mugs of milky coffee with hints of hazelnut and cinnamon warmed our hands. I took the deepest breath, let that heavy, sweet aroma fill my lungs, allowed the scent to travel to my brain and remember past cafe's with similar mugs of coffee and similar watching of people. This will mark the twenty third time we’d left such a scene. The first we’d had to see for almost five years. Just when there seemed to be an end to the horror, some new wolf emerges to slaughter. At one time, perhaps nearer the beginning when I'd not been so closely guarded and hiding such a need for control of my life, there was a certain amount of excitement. One that I knew Ty shared equally, a feeling of anticipation of the chase, that tiny leap in your stomach that all such animals feel. How quickly that became lost in a madman’s favourite game.

I sighed at the thought that I'd so far wasted my life. Too long spent sifting my way through sickness, lifting the heavy cloak that guards the masochist we track, allowing the truth of him it's moment in the light.

I find it hard to admit just how empty it makes me feel. That maybe, if I didn't have Ty, I'd have nothing. Only death and failure.

I'd hate to think that he feels what I feel, he is my one light in the darkness, a candle that flickers and wavers but never extinguishes. He has become my conscience, my empathy, my future. I drown in the knowledge that without him I am doomed to live an immortal existence of emptiness.

I am officially pathetic.
 

"So...looks like someone killed the ass."

I looked at Ty for a moment - regaining the present and putting a stop to the bloody massacre my thoughts were becoming. "Wait, someone killed the Alpha?"

He nodded and grinned in utter glee. "A female, no less."

I had to laugh at that, it didn't even matter why she'd done it, I was simply ridiculously happy that he'd had his comeuppance in the most karmic way possible - the man had not been a fan of women. It was somewhat gratifying that all his hate and unfounded bigotry had been ended by one woman and her, no doubt, righteous anger.

I flicked eyes to the window and watched as mothers took their young children to school. It was a crisp January and the Christmas break had fallen quickly back to the rat race. Everything was just bit too fast, people moving without stopping to take a breath of the world around them. How sad that even this small town had succumbed to city living. The wolf slowed the human down, begged to stop and take that breath. I snorted softly, she may be fast - exquisitely so, right up until she came across a bush that needed investigating. "Who is she?"

He took a long gulp of his coffee and I caught the cinnamon scent as it swirled around in his mug. "Don't know, didn’t catch her name. Has some balls though."

I smiled and agreed readily, I hadn't met her but I already liked her."Who's taking over? The Beta?"

He shrugged and lifted those sea blue eyes to mine. "He's not here, from what James said, no one's heard from him for a while. Not only that but James is one of the few remaining males in that pack, they all took off a couple of months ago and haven't returned. If anyone knows why, they aren't talking."

I sat in silence for a while. Alex leaving was one thing, nearly all the males was quite another. "What the hell is going on?"

He shrugged again, a habit of his when he had no answer to give but thought he needed to give me something.

"We'll just do what we planned from the start, the hill to the east of their territory is still a decent place to hide out while we figure out our next move. Hell, if they get a new Alpha maybe he won't be as much of a prick."

Ty grinned at me and reached out to tug on my hair, "You just harboring some feelings of grief there, Sash? Because lover boys gone and gotten his head lopped off?"

I cringed at the thought, that Alpha had hated us both with a passion born from ignorance and yet he still felt he was owed some sort of sexual payment for me living on land he claimed was his.
Not damn likely
. I'd have cut it off before it touched any part of me.

Ty winked and a devilish smile cut across his face, "bet you're missing old grabby hands huh?."

He could laugh all he liked, I knew full well that he would of taken the breath from his lungs if the Alpha ever attempted to touch me. "Don't be gross. Don't think I won't bring up Lydia if you carry on." I tried to hide the smile that grew to beaming at his uncomfortable shiver. The problem with a pack containing so many un-mated females is that any male starts to look good after too long a wait - even one with a little extra not so hidden under the surface.

He tried to hide his reaction and only served to make himself look even more shifty. "Woman was mental, let's just leave it there shall we?"

I graciously bowed out, we had basics to get before heading out and much more would lead to an endless argument. I gulped the last of my coffee and slid out of the booth, hearing Ty follow me as his trousers squeaked against the plastic-like leather of the seats. We started towards the local store and I took the lead quickly, fully intending on leading with the list. I’d learned my lesson last time and remained in charge of all things essential. He was a child in adult form.

By the time I’d paid, nothing felt better than the wind on my face, chasing the stifling, enclosed air far away. I gave Ty the supplies and sent him on ahead, giving us both a little break from each other. He was fresh air to a stifling existence, like the emergence of the moon after the sun’s heady heat. There’s only so much togetherness we could take though, not enough wolves in our unconventional pack to lessen the demands of such social creatures.

Our pack was formed early, in a stark kind of horror that begged children to become fully grown adults. Sometimes, it was perhaps a blessing - losing parents who betrayed the very nature of the wolf. Too selfish and greedy to spare time for the child they'd birthed. I'd like to be able to blame at least some of it on their feeder, that empaths are just not suited for reproducing. But that would be reproof against the same creature I housed - one that worked willingly with the wolf that prowled inside.

Our mothers had been the same seemingly soulless beings, too intent on feeding that hunger with darkness to give any time to a baby. Our fathers both a mix of wolf and empath - mine a particularly strong wolf that gave me an animal mean enough to lead. Ty was different; a little more feeder and a little less animal, a mix that gave him some rather surprising abilities. I'm somewhat guiltily glad that we ended up orphans so early, we had less time to become so corrupted by people lost to feeding off sin - becoming the emotion they consumed so readily.

Neither of us needed as much as they had seemed to, we could go a long time suppressing that hunger and we did so regularly. Sometimes we made it a fortnight, sometimes longer and we were careful with what we took. We learned to live with what we are, safe in the knowledge that we’d wrapped that entity in enough confinement to breathe a little more easily. I was currently okay with my heritage, happy almost. It's a rare occurrence and one I'm never able to hang onto but there it is - some kind of glaring hope for the future.

I looked towards the forest as it spanned the furthest point in front. Tall trees bare of green as the winter's frost strips it's coat, fog descending low to hover at ground level, a little bit of magic that cloaks and divides and swirls to cover tracks. The territory ran the length of the forest and beyond, stretching far into the next town, some eighty miles that's marked and distinctly divided for our species. I grinned as we neared, hopefully there were still some wolves on patrol to notice our entrance. I always did enjoy the chase.

Our plan was rather simple, we'd sit and wait and watch for the Alpha that comes. Perhaps he'd be one to see our side, perhaps he'd use his station to at least listen for a change. I surprised even myself at times; even the most cynical could not help wishful thinking. I'm afraid that he won't listen, that he'll be the same as the last, or worse, and then I might snap my steadfast control, the one that bashes for that freedom it craves. I'd spent too long denying it air and now it's suffocating in staleness - nearly twenty years of finding those bodies and my subsequent failures.Now this new wolf that had taken the mantel from the one we’d never caught, changed the game on me to target people that were innocent. I’d lost the original villain but I’d not lose his copycat.

I'd reached the end of my rope and now this Alpha will dangle on the end, swing for my answers and strangle til he replies correctly.

He'll help or he'll regret denying me.