Authors: Bianca L. Eugene
“What’s wrong with having something to prove, my nigga?” I heard from behind me.
It was him. Durran stood there in front of me solemnly as everyone watched in silence. He walked over to Mike and sat in his vacant chair. He was wearing a pair of gray slacks, a gray cashmere sweater and a pair of black Gucci loafers.
I was in shock. I couldn’t say a word. I looked him straight in the eye and I had no feelings for him. It was like he was one of the customers in here. He stood up and walked towards me.
“I just need to get tapered up real quick.” He said handing Mike a $100 bill like it was a dollar. Mike looked completely confused. He didn’t know whether to take it or not. He looked over at Cliff and Cliff only gave him a nod.
“Sometimes you fuck up, right? Everybody fucks up. So like a man, you take responsibility. You admit that you made possibly the biggest mistake in your life. You admit that maybe you have a problem. Then you wait and wonder if maybe you’ll get another chance, you dig?
Somewhere down the line, I got tired of waiting. I decided I was gonna take what I needed.” He explained as if I was the only one in the room.
“Take, huh?”
“Not like that-”
“Because what it seems like is you’re looking for an item-an object. You ain’t gonna find that here.” I said calm and collected.
“I know, Keish. I’m working on it. I never wanted you to feel that way. Did you like the flowers at least-yo, my man…can I get tapered up or not?” He asked.
Mike looked back over at Cliff again. Cliff gave him another nod. Mike put the cape around Durran, started his clippers, and began to cut.
“They are nice. What do you want?”
“Come on Mama, you know what I came back for
.
”
“Durran…”
“Just take a walk with me. Just give me a chance to talk to you. That’s all.”
I glanced at Cliff, “I’m good.”
“Keisha, please.” He begged.
“I said no. I’m at work.”
“Who’s your boss? Let me speak with management.” He said laughing.
“You’re embarrassing yourself.”
“Nah, lemme holla at ol’ boy.
Is he on duty?” He asked sarcastically with that same cocky ass smile I’d grown accustomed to.
Mike turned off the clippers and took his cape off, “Man, you need to dip.”
“What? I’m a paying customer, my nigga. Taper it up.” He ordered laughing. He was doing way too much.
“You know what Durran, just go. We’re done. Just go back to Atlanta.” I said beginning to get frustrated.
Durran shook his head angrily before rising from his seat and walking towards me, “Why you trippin, Keish? I mean is this the life you wanna live? You wanna be fuckin’ some barber for the rest of your life? I make this nigga’s salary for a club appearance.”
“Durran, leave.”
I said angrily.
He turned to Cliff and then turned back to me, “You gotta be fuckin’ kiddin’ me. Your mom told me you
was
fuckin’ with this nigga and I couldn’t believe it. You went from Buckhead to fuckin’ Seven Mile?”
“Durran-”
“Yo Hollywood, get the fuck outta here.” Cliff said approaching Durran.
“Nice to meet you, Clifford.
How’s business? You need an investor?” Durran continued.
“My nigga, I’m not into all that back and forth. I’mma
ask
you respectfully…get the fuck out of my shop.” Cliff said with a look in his eyes that I’d never seen before.
Durran began to laugh, “Maybe you don’t understand, New York. I’ll put it in a way you can understand. Yo B, she’s not feelin’ you like dat, money. Shorty wanna be all under me, feel me? You got my sloppy second’s, dun.”
“I ain’t gon’ tell you but one more time.” Cliff warned.
“Whatever, nigga.
Come on, Keisha.” Durran said waving Cliff off and grabbing my arm.
From that very moment, Cliff sent a stiff punch into Durran’s jaw flooring him. He began to stomp him repeatedly.
“Cliff, stop!” I screamed in horror, “Somebody please stop him!”
Mike and Ricky held Cliff back as I continued to watch completely stunned. I’d never seen Cliff act like that.
He’d turned into a completely different person, and it was unsettling.
Even as Mike and Ricky held him back, he tried his damnedest to escape.
Eventually he stopped, grabbed the vase with the flowers in it, and threw it at Durran shattering it next to him before storming into the back.
“Yo, y’all gotta dip. We closed for the rest of the day.” Ricky announced.
“Fam, do you see my hair? This shit looks like muppet fur.” One of the customers said.
“Well, take yo ass to Sesame Street.” Ricky replied.
“That’s fucked up, Ricky. You said you was gonna hook me up-”
“Dip. I’ll do it half off tomorrow.” He said. The customer smacked his teeth and left with the others.
I looked down at Durran and helped him up. He was bleeding from the mouth, “I’m sorry.”
He shook his head, “Don’t worry ‘bout it, Mama.”
“Durran…”
“I know I ain’t go about doing everything the right way, but no matter what you think, I loved you more than anything,” He said before wiping the blood from his lip and glancing at it on his palm, “I love you, Keisha.”
And with that, Durran was gone. He’d never come back, and to be honest, I wasn’t sure how I felt about it. I turned around and all the barbers were looking at me as I made my way to the back with Cliff.
He was sitting on the couch, elbows on his knees, with his hands coupled together holding his head up. He looked like he was staring straight through me. I didn’t know what to say.
I cautiously walked over to the couch and sat down next to him. He instantly popped up and walked over to the
lockers. He punched one of them, instantly leaving a dent.
“This shit ain’t gon’ work.”
I felt like a ton of bricks hit me, “What? Cliff-”
“You ain’t
tell
me it was that
Durran
.” He said.
“What does it matter!?”
“I can’t be fucking up every nigga that look your way. I lost control in front of my staff and my customers. Who’s gonna wanna come in here after I beat that nigga’s ass like that? That’s fucking with my money.”
“So you’re leaving me because of that!?”
“I can’t give you what that nigga gave you. I can’t do that. I just can’t. This nigga come in here handin’ out bills and shit tryna embarrass somebody. Fuck that nigga.”
I just sat quietly. I knew there was nothing I could say. I understood why he was angry, but it hurt me that he was reacting like he was towards me.
“I saw you help his bitch ass up too. Go back to him. You feel bad for him? You heard his ass; go back to Buckhead or wherever the fuck y’all
was
at!” He scolded before shaking his head and beginning to pace, “Every day I see these cats in here droolin’ over you and
can’t do nothin’
. All it
do
is eat away at me. This shit is drivin’ me crazy.”
“Why are you being so insecure? I love you -”
“It ain’t
no
point in talkin’ about this no more.”
I stood up and ran towards him trying to hold him. He backed up violently, “Get away from me.” He yelled.
I was sick of this. I didn’t do anything to deserve how he was treating me. I was tired of trying to calm him down.
I walked over to my locker and pulled everything out of it, “I quit.”
Chapter Sixteen
“What you doing, Keisha?”
Ricky asked me.
By this time, I was packing at my station and my supplies.
“I’m leaving. I quit.”
“Why?”
I didn’t respond. I just kept packing my things.
“Yo Cliff, she leaving.”
Rick announced as he walked to the back.
Cliff came out the back, “You ain’t gotta leave.”
“Yes I do,” I said continuing to pack up the rest of my things, “I’ll be back for the big stuff.”
And with that I was gone. I was so hurt and felt so damn stupid. I reached my car and put everything in it. Once I was in I begin to bawl uncontrollably.
Bam Bam!!
I looked up and Cliff was beating on my window. I just looked at him blankly.
“Let me in.” He pleaded.
He’d begun to look like the Cliff I knew again, so I unlocked the door. He hopped inside and sat for a minute with me while he looked through the windshield of the car. As my crying subsided he finally looked me in the eyes.
“I’m sorry,” He said before grabbing my hand, “I don’t want you
to
quit and I don’t want you to leave.”
“Yeah, but I can’t be here if we not together.”
More silence. It was so much I wanted to say but, I didn’t know where to begin.
I wanted to tell him that I loved him more than I had ever loved any man-
that
I was afraid of the way he made
me feel. I wanted him to know there wasn’t anything I wanted more than to be his woman.
“I got a bad temper,” He admitted, “It’s not your fault. None of this was your fault. The last time I lost my temper like that I almost killed a dude. For all these years I’ve been able to keep my temper in check, but…”
I was almost scared for him to continue. I sat there patiently waiting for him to collect his thoughts as I squeezed his hand. He looked down at our hands and continued.
“Since I met you, it’s been hard.”
“What do you mean?”
“Ion
know…
shit been crazy between us.”
I turned to face him, “I’m sorry.”
“It’s not your doing. I’m just tryna get used to this, feel me?”
“I haven’t felt this way about anyone either. And it scares me too, but not enough to leave you.” I said putting my head down.
He put his hand underneath my chin to lift it so that our eyes could meet, “I don’t want you to leave. I need you here. I apologize.”
“I accept your apology.”
“Come here.” He said pulling me close and kissing me on the forehead. He then kissed me lightly on the lips.
We went back into the shop and cleaned up all the mess. The rest of the barbers were seated in the break room.
Cliff finally explained to them that he and I were together. He also apologized for his behavior before announcing our trip to New York.
“When y’all leavin’?” Ricky asked.
“Next week.” He replied.
I was under the impression that the trip wouldn’t be for at least a month. I looked at him with surprise all over my face.
“What? You don’t wanna go no more?” He asked slightly agitated.
“You know I do, but I can’t just leave Taylor.”
“Then bring her with us.”
I glanced over at the barbers and they looked a bit uncomfortable. I looked back at Cliff and it looked as he’d picked up the vibe as well. We’d already aired out enough of our business today.
“Well when I’m gone, Mike is in charge.”
“Gimmie my twenty, Ricky.”
Mike said with his hand out.
“Man, we ain’t never
shake
on nothin’.” Rick replied before heading towards the door, “I’ll holla Cliff. Try not to punch
no
producers while you’re in New York.”
“Right.
You know Def Jam ain’t that far away from your crib, remember,” Mike chimed in before laughing and following Ricky. He directed his attention back to Ricky, “Nah for real doe, gimmie my twenty. I told you he was gonna leave the shop to me.
We havin’ butt naked hoes up here during after-hours next week.”
“Mike.” Cliff called.
Mike stopped in his tracks and turned around, “It was just a joke. Lighten up, Clifford.”
“Aye
don’t
be callin’ me Clifford.” Cliff said as Mike left. He turned to me with a smile on his face.
“I can’t call you Clifford anymore?” I joked.
“You’re the only one who can call me that outside of my Moms.” He said walking over to the couch and taking a seat, “So what you don’t wanna go no more?”
“I told you I do.”
“Just bring Taylor.”
“I can’t just pull her out of school. You know that. I’ve did that once before and I’m not doing it again.”
“I feel you…”
I sat and pondered for a moment, “Let’s go for a ride.”
He smiled, “Where?”
“Don’t worry about it. I’m driving. I’ll take real good care of you.” I said smiling.
“I think I done had enough surprises, Ma.” He said with a sly grin.