Authors: Lizzy Ford
Yes. Only she didn’t understand why. She
tugged off her coat and hung it up in the closet, unable to figure
out why her sweaters made her head hurt more.
“Are you even listening to me?” Dawn
demanded, her anger growing. “Beck and I are getting married.”
Fed up with her, Autumn shoved her closet
door closed. “Right. Because he’ll marry you when you’re sleeping
with his twin, and I’m staying at his cabin. Grow up, Dawn. He
doesn’t want anything to do with you. This isn’t the sixties, where
you could force someone to marry you by getting knocked up. You
sure it’s his and not Decker’s or someone else’s anyway?”
Dawn was quiet. A glance showed she was
surprised and furious. Autumn gripped her cane and left before the
girl had time to recover. She reached the top of the stairwell
before she heard Dawn slam the door hard enough to make the windows
shudder. She was screaming something behind the door. Autumn
cringed and made her way quickly down the stairs.
She didn’t want to be around when that train
wreck left. Instead of going to the couch, Autumn went to the back
door leading into the Square. She paused, gazing out the window.
Much of the Square had been cleared of snow that was now piled on
the sides of the boys’ dorms, reaching the roofs. The students
remaining for the holiday were gathered around bonfires or throwing
snowballs at each other in the snowy area, farther back in the
Square near the tree line. Amber, Matilda and Michael Turner stood
with the students at one fire. By the pounding in Autumn’s head,
the former Mistress of Night was somewhere out there, too.
Autumn’s hand dropped from the door knob.
The people in the Square seemed … unburdened. She felt more at home
with Sam in his tree stump than she did here. Though it was
midmorning, the scents of turkey, ham and pies tickled her nose
already. Amber told the class the day before that they’d have a
lunch at noon.
The front door slammed. She turned and
caught a flash of Dawn’s blond hair through the window in the door.
Relieved the girl was gone, Autumn went to the couch. Troubled by
what Beck and Dawn told her, she turned on the television without
any real interest in watching.
The crowd out back moved indoors a few
minutes after she sat down. Autumn moved to one side of the couch.
There were a couple dozen people who filled the living area and
dining room. Board games emerged, and talk from cheerful players
soon drowned out the television.
Her head ached along with her leg. Autumn
rose and caught sight of the twins’ mother in the dining area.
Unable to explain the strange effect the former Mistress of Dark
had on her, Autumn chose to go outside for air.
She exited onto the porch. The cold day was
cloudy, though no more snow had fallen. Autumn descended the stairs
and walked to the gravel driveway then followed it around the
dorms. She glanced at the forbidden trail without stopping, instead
continuing to the small bridge over the stream.
Leaning over the bridge, Autumn was
fascinated by the way water still flowed, though the edges of the
creek were frozen.
“Hey.”
She looked up at the husky voice, knowing
whose it was before she saw him standing at the edge of the bridge,
like a shadow. Her heart quickened. Tall and strong, Decker’s
steady gaze made her stomach flutter from the distance.
“Hi, Decker,” she said.
His face rippled, human-inhuman-human. The
sight made her stomach sink. He paced onto the bridge and paused in
front of her. His shadows were restrained again this day. She found
herself leaning back anyway, her breathing already irregular.
“I didn’t think you’d come today,” she said,
gazing up at him.
“I wanted to see you,” he said. “I’m here to
say good-bye.”
“Where are you…” she trailed off. Fear that
wasn’t wholly hers pierced her thoughts.
“The Darkness is taking me. I want it to.
It’ll make life easier.”
“Decker …” she said, aghast.
“I’m not sure when it’ll happen. Soon,
though.”
“Why?”
“I won’t hurt anyone this way.”
Speechless, Autumn searched his face. She
saw resolution there. It terrified her on levels she wasn’t able to
access. The fear penetrated the recesses of her mind. He killed
innocent witchlings. He might’ve kidnapped Tanya.
I can’t lose him.
He slept around. He’d never be loyal to her.
Even if he was, how did she live with him, knowing the things he
did?
We belong together.
Her logic and instincts warred.
“There’s another way,” she said at last. “I
mean, you can’t …Decker.” His name came out choked. She was
panicking, the same sense of fear and dread filling her that she
experienced watching the ghost of Summer on the cliff.
“You’re so sweet, Autumn,” he said. His face
softened. He reached forward to brush away a tear she hadn’t
noticed. His touch burned, and he paused, meeting her gaze again.
The connection was enough for fire to light her blood. Desire
flared in his dark eyes. His hand dropped.
“Isn’t there anything I can say or do?” she
asked, distraught.
“No.” His voice was firm. “I made that
mistake once. I won’t risk it again. You all will be better off
this way without me in your lives screwing things up.”
“You shouldn’t get to make that decision for
me!” She flushed with anger.
“If I hadn’t pushed the last girl I cared
about off a cliff…”
Autumn wasn’t sure which hit her harder: the
fact he admitted what he’d done or that he cared about her. As if
aware of what he’d said, his face turned pink.
“I can’t control what I am, Autumn. I
couldn’t stand it if I hurt you.”
“I refuse to believe it’s hopeless.”
“It’s not. I’m taking the path that will
protect everyone.”
His decision was made. She didn’t know what
else to say. Her mind was making things worse, because the
emotional side wouldn’t quiet down long enough for her to know what
to do. She wiped her eyes.
“I’ll miss you,” she said. “I hope you
change your mind.”
“You’ll be the first to know.” He studied
her features, the need still in his eyes. “Farewell kiss?”
She answered by eliminating the distance
between them, as she had after their walk. Decker eased closer and
smoothed errant curls away from her face. He tucked them behind her
ears before tilting her face up. He held her gaze, tracing her jaw
line.
No part of Autumn urged her to resist this
time. His tender caress left trails of fire across her skin. When
his lips met hers, he released some of the passion he’d withheld
the first time he kissed her. Deep and demanding, his hunger for
her swept away any doubt she belonged to him, if not in this life,
then in another. Autumn’s body yielded, and his arms circled her,
absorbing her into his shadows, warmth and scent. She tasted his
need – and his desperation. Both compelled her sense of urgency
upwards.
She clung to him, as aware of her own
surrender as she was the tremor going through his body. Their
magicks mixed and flowed, the five elements balanced in perfect
harmony.
Whatever they had been – or were meant to be
– she had to save him.
Decker withdrew. His breathing was as heavy
as hers. His hands remained on her face, his cheek against
hers.
“I’m sorry, Autumn,” he whispered.
The words she wanted to say were stuck in
her throat. She didn’t want to leave his arms or let him face his
fate alone.
With effort, he moved away from her. She
steadied herself as his hands left her body. Emotions wriggled free
of the barrier blocking her memories. Though he’d only held her
once, his sudden absence left her feeling empty. Alone. Lost.
“Decker,” she called, near breathless from
his kiss.
He stopped at the edge of the bridge.
“There must be another way.” The words
sounded so useless to her own ears. Emotions and the affect of his
lingering shadows drove away her ability to put into words what the
hidden memories were trying to tell her.
“The … the Darkness will protect you from
me. This is the only way,” he repeated.
Every instinct in her body warned her
otherwise. She didn’t understand how he’d fallen so far as to
believe the world was better off without him, with the Darkness in
his place. Autumn sagged against the railing of the bridge, head
pounding.
She’d failed him.
“He didn’t hurt you did he?”
Beck’s soothing touch was on her arm. His
magick eased her distress, and the panic that had seized her began
to subside. She was shaking and crying, unaware she did either
before his touch.
“N…no,” she said, looking up at him.
His features were torn between concern and
anger. Autumn wanted to curl up in his warmth and sob. She needed
her memories to help Decker. As much as she thought she’d mastered
her mind, she wasn’t able to break through the barrier. If Decker
truly did surrender to the Darkness, it was because she was too
weak to help him.
“Decker, I warned you to stay away,” Beck
said. His attention turned from the trembling girl to the unmoving
form of his brother at one end of the bridge. He didn’t know what
had happened between them that left the normally calm Autumn so
distraught. Her mind was reeling too much for him to make sense of
her thoughts.
Whatever passed between them, it hadn’t been
good. He was too late, as usual. He had a good excuse this time;
he’d been searching for Tanya. She hadn’t given off any warning
that she was being threatened by magick, which made it nearly
impossible for him to locate her, without help.
Fortunately, he had help. One of Dawn’s
longtime friends had called him, concerned when a ranting Dawn
stormed out of the dorm not an hour before. Beck was on his way to
search for Tanya when his magick brought him to Autumn instead.
“I don’t need you to tell me what to do,”
Decker growled.
“We made a deal.”
“And where did she stay last night?”
Beck gritted his teeth. “It’s not what you
think. Look at her, Decker. You’re a train wreck. She’s
shaking.”
“I’m fine,” Autumn said to him in a hushed
voice. “He didn’t do anything.”
“It’s okay, Autumn.” Decker turned to face
him. “My brother is right. I destroy everything good in the world,
and I’d destroy you.”
“That’s not what I mean, Decker,” Beck said
with a sigh. “You don’t mean to, but you will.”
“The great protector. Good luck with
that.”
His face grew warm. “I might knock up girls,
but I don’t knock them off cliffs.”
Anger flared in Decker’s eyes. He drew near,
and Beck sensed the gathering of magick. Along with teaching him to
travel as Decker did, their mother had showed him how to use his
magick as a weapon. It made him sick. She hadn’t told him why she
did it, but Beck suspected she’d felt Decker slipping. The bond
between the former Dark Mistress and her son, the Dark Master, was
strong.
Decker’s face flipped back and forth between
him and the Darkness. He was almost gone.
Beck stepped up to Decker, toe-to-toe,
willing to do whatever it took to protect the only person capable
of saving them.
“I know you’re not challenging me, brother,”
Decker hissed. “Is Autumn worth your life?”
“Absolutely,” Beck said without hesitation.
“As lost as you almost are, you feel the same.”
Decker’s face shifted. It turned still
enough to be a stone carving, and the black of his pupils swallowed
his eyes. Cold fire shot through Beck. This magick was evil and
powerful, Decker’s shadows multiplied several times over.
“Next time we meet, boy, will be the last.”
This voice jarred Beck. The Darkness was talking just loudly enough
for Beck to hear. “We’ll claim her, too.”
“Stop, please!” Autumn said, taking Beck’s
arm. She reached up to Decker and touched his face.
Beck saw him shudder, and the presence
disappeared, replaced by Decker again.
“Then take care of her,” Decker said, as if
unaware of what the Darkness said. “I’ll be gone soon.” He turned
and strode away.
Beck watched him, rattled by the strength of
the Darkness and Decker’s acceptance of his fate. The few tools his
mother taught him weren’t going to put a dent in what the Darkness
would do, once released.
“No,” Autumn whispered, starting after
Decker.
Taking her arm, Beck pulled her back. “Stay
with me, Autumn.”
She faced him, her blue eyes tormented. Her
body was tugging at his magick. He released it and hugged her hard,
not wanting her to see his fear. He had no idea what to do when the
Darkness came for her. She shook in his arms.
“It’ll be okay,” he said.
The air played with her hair. He smoothed it
back down and rested his cheek against her head, thinking hard. She
was struggling with her mind. The barrier his mother created was
too strong for Autumn to break. Beck wanted desperately to remove
it, so she’d remember.