B002FB6BZK EBOK (31 page)

You and I, he said.

Then he looked at the darkening horizon. The charm in it earlier vanished. A reddish winding spark looked threaded like a shoelace. Two poplars were still seen blurry in the distance, beyond the grove that was no
longer seen, and further away the small church was seen. Look at the new
church, said Ebenezer.

It was here all the time, said Samuel.

I didn't see it until now, said Ebenezer.

You didn't look, said Samuel.

And it was here?

All the time, said Samuel.

Funny, said Ebenezer.

But Samuel also understood that Ebenezer was now thinking about the
railroad car that brought him here because then, in the railroad car, the
years he had had before ended. Then the church was seen and afterward
was wiped out like all the memories and now it was new. Samuel smiled at
the food now brought in open railroad cars. A plunder of food lighted by
hurricane lamps and spotlights. A fresh lemon fell to the ground, and when
a German tried to pick it up he was kicked by a soldier who tried to laugh
and didn't laugh. But the German didn't want to straighten up now. There
was no point. Somebody yelled: Get up, and Ebenezer said to the English
captain: You really think I'm a joke about an elephant?

The Englishman said to him: I don't think you're a joke about an elephant, Mr. Schneerson. I do, said Ebenezer. They brought me and I remember now. Who am I who remembers? Don't know. There was a floor.
And German soldiers and Jewish forced laborers from Vilna were still alive.
The first hut they built around me. I arranged the joints, I put in the nails,
I supervised the work, from inside, and they built the walls around me.
That's how you trap an elephant, isn't it? You draw a trap around him and
he's inside. Maybe I'm still building the hut the tank is destroying. And
what now? Go know, my back is turned to Kramer, who sees me in the dark
even if his hands are tied.

You're not alone, said the Englishman, who had known something about
psychology before the war and once in London saw Sigmund Freud get
into a black car driven by a young woman. There was no joy in his voice
when Ebenezer tried to stitch the tatters of dark with leaps of words. The
glowing light of the hurricane lamps and the spotlights covered the area
and distanced it from him. The man on the microphone almost pleaded:
You've got to be free! You've got to be free! Free? Without Kramer? That's
absurd, said Ebenezer.

It will cost a lot, he said afterward to the officer. Women were still hiding in the huts, peeping out, scared. Skeletons in pajamas dropped after
eating the first time, typhus will eat them, he said in English, officials and
doctors ran around here and there. DDT showers operated vigorously. A
tank fed the motor of the generator that operated the electricity. The
Germans who had been brought to Germanify Poland dug in silence and
buried the dead in the dark. Nobody paid attention to them anymore.

Weiss wasn't found. He's worth a lot, Weiss, said a German soldier who
sat tied up in a wheelbarrow. Ebenezer gazed in wonder at the sight of
hunger and thirst that split his lips. Did you ever see hungry Germans? he
asked Samuel, who wanted to sell food to the German, but the German
only had marks and pfennigs and that didn't satisfy him and the Englishman was starting to show signs of impatience and the Red Cross man
thought that was disgusting. Then another German rummaged in his pockets and found money. Samuel helped him search, went and brought food
and water. He took the watch from the German in the wheelbarrow, he
told Ebenezer, who looked at him sadly: I piss on the Englishman, what do I care what he thinks of me! And they devoured the food. The Germans
don't have diamonds in their rectums, said Samuel, and there's no point
searching. He's got a watch, and that one has a camera, here it is. Everything's for you, Ebenezer. I'm taking care of you! The German's face was
red, he was eating bullybeef and overcooked fruit and vegetables. The
English officer averted his eyes. The Germans burying the dead in the
pits looked mutely at the German chomping in the wheelbarrow and their
mouths started chomping air.

Got to find Weiss, yelled the English Captain Wood. He yelled at
Kramer: Your commander has gotten away from us! Kramer didn't answer.
He was staring at Ebenezer. The wretched stance was an instance of offense to him, Ebenezer had to remember that moment, he even wanted to
take pity on Kramer, not Kramer the commander but Kramer the prisoner,
Kramer who even now was Weiss's deputy, but he couldn't. No feeling
throbbed in him. He thought maybe they were members of the same band
of grave robbers. Got to spray, yelled the Englishman, and find Weiss.
Coarse eating, typhus, lice, more DDT, less eating. You've got to be free!
Germans to work. The smell is awful, got to bury and burn as fast as possible, otherwise they'll die of plague. Destroy the blocks! And maybe
Ebenezer said: Leave something for a memory, otherwise they won't believe us. Kramer should be given to a circus, let him be taken from place
to place and tell. The Englishman looked at him with open animosity and
Samuel laughed. He feels uncomfortable, that Captain Wood. He sees
death and Kramer feels something, he doesn't know what. What world is
there outside? asks Samuel and tries to sell food to the Germans in exchange for watches and rings. Memory is Jewish science, scoffs Kramer, and
a young Australian who replaced one of the guards pushed Kramer and in
the process hit him in the ribs. But he didn't show them the pain, not
while Ebenezer was standing in front of him. The German in the wheelbarrow finished eating and started shaking. A jeep sped by and sprayed
thick dust. The German who was covered with white material tried to wipe
it off his face, but his hands were greasy from the food and Samuel said: It's
bone dust, and the German shook even more and tried not to see the skeleton of a woman in pajamas who stopped not far from him and held an
apple, her mouth was toothless, she spat at the German and in terror she
wiped the dust off him with her hands. I wipe myself on all of you like paper, said Samuel. The German waited for his tears to flow and wash away
the spit but they didn't flow. He doesn't like the taste of our spit, said
Samuel, and a salvo of shots was heard in the distance, the microphone
went on barking.

The improvised white flags were waving by ten. The tramping tanks
stopped on the fences. Why didn't you think of a decent and splendid
defeat? he asked Kramer, who blocked his ears. White panties instead of
flags, that's a disgrace, isn't it? Fat Frieda, for whom the French chef would
make fish heads, stuck a white ribbon to her sleeve and ran outside when
she heard the tramping tanks. An enormous wolfhound burst out of the
guardroom and chomped a hand that had previously been torn off, dripping
thick material that may really have been blood, thought Ebenezer, the dog
sat down on Frieda and she yelled: She's here! The dog loved her and lay on
her to protect her and licked her, and she yelled: Get off of me, monster, but
he didn't understand the orders and licked and Frieda was crushed, turned
pale, turned blue. What love, said Samuel afterward, and the tanks split the
fences and people in pajamas peeped as if they didn't believe. Skeletons
who came to life walked on the ground padded with bone dust and the
dog was called Brutus. Until they shot the dog, somebody said: Those
were barks permeated with ideological awareness! And then Weiss was
seen fleeing for his life with a bottle of wine in his hand and the picture
of the Fuhrer he managed to throw at the dog who was shot. The dog licked
the Fuhrer as he died. Not exactly a heartwarming picture when Frieda
was crushed to death. The funniest thing of all, said somebody, was that
Weiss looked shocked but was afraid to throw his cigarette on the ground
so as not to litter the yard. And they didn't know where he was. Those
bonfires, the food that came, the British officers, Captain Wood who took
a position next to Ebenezer all day. Eat! Drink! You've got to be free!
shrieked the microphone.

Then they die in DDT showers. Final solution of life, says a man who
swallowed too much food and he turns pale and drops, his hand outstretched, still managing to trap a slice of sausage and chokes. And tranquility reigns, at long last tranquility reigns. Imaginary, not imaginary, one
toilet for four hundred German workers. Stench mixed with an aroma of
a distant meadow. Captain Wood a crumbled empire with medals on his
chest. Historic spectacle, he says to himself, St. Bartholomew's night, and Kramer doesn't budge. It's to his credit, isn't it, thinks Ebenezer, he
didn't ask for food. When he was given a glass of water, he held it in his
tied hands. And then he poured out the water. Some time has to pass, time
that will grant these moments their meaning, and the moment hasn't yet
come. Kramer is trying to give his sitting that proud solidity he saw in the
propaganda films that were wasted on him. He looks at his last battlefield.
His soldiers are in wheelbarrows or graves, tied up, pleading for food and
water. A momentary ritual nightmare, he said to Ebenezer, who couldn't
hear him. In a little while we'll know what to do, the Fuhrer has surely left
instructions, there's something to be done, but we don't yet know what, got
to gain time, a retreat for some time and then we'll attack again. Kramer is
seeking some sign, why didn't he devastate the land along with the traitors.
It all has to be started over, says Kramer. And Ebenezer is amazed at how
he can read Kramer's mind, even today. Kramer says to the Englishman: I
beg your pardon for the water I spilled, I'm talking now as one officer to
another, but without getting any orders what can I do? The Englishman
didn't understand Kramer's splendid German, and went on drinking his
beer, and spitting. The sight of the splendid death of another officer who
was mistakenly shot by an English soldier cleaning his weapon pleased him
quite a bit, even though it was incorrect in terms of military protocol. The
gravediggers also saw in the death the nobility they were denied and didn't
yet know how to be despised properly. Weiss the fool is hiding under the
dead Jews, thought Kramer, I'm still secretly recording things about him,
as long as I haven't received an explicit order to report what Weiss is doing.
And the dead officer dropped masterfully. And in contrast to his splendid
death, Weiss was now taken out of the corpses and, shaking in terror, was
led to them. Some of the skeletons he lay under were still breathing, his
mouth dripped the remains of wine he had drunk in hiding. They sit him
down next to Kramer and somebody kicks him too, he bites his lips, wails
until his hands are tied. Don't blindfold him, says Samuel, let him learn to
see! And the English obey Samuel Lipker. Weiss asks for food and water
and the soldiers bring it to him. He holds out his tied hands, chews hungrily and drinks water. He tries to wipe his face but he can't. Finally he
manages to wipe his face with his forearms. Kramer points to the dead
officer and says: There died a manly officer, you sell yourself for a slice of
bread! Weiss doesn't answer and looks around. Something isn't clear to him. His eyes run from Kramer stuck to him to Captain Wood, he's trying
to know where the power is. Maybe there's some mistake here. There was
no mistake, says Kramer. Weiss doesn't get it yet. People are passing by
him with wheelbarrows full of cadavers and he turns his face aside. Only
when Kramer challenges Weiss and looks at him with restrained and tranquil contempt does Ebenezer understand that maybe the war is over.

Samuel understood that by nine in the morning when Frieda started
looking for linens to make white flags. Ebenezer is slower. An enlightened
camp, Samuel Lipker says to Wood, an enlightened camp with electricity,
water, and a French chef.

Night falls. Samuel falls asleep. He earned enough on the first evening
of life. In the morning a new sun breaks forth. Somebody took pity on the
Germans digging and filling gigantic graves and gave them food. They
swallow hungrily. Kramer sits without moving in the place where he sat
yesterday. Maybe he didn't shut his eyes either. Weiss is transferred to the
improvised interrogation room. Kramer says contemptuously: Now he'll
sing them oratorios, but his voice is hoarse. Ebenezer approaches Kramer,
touches him. Kramer looks at his Jew. A long meaningless look. They no
longer have anything to say to one another. A whole day, the one and only
day in their lives, each looked at the other. Kramer doesn't want to smile.
Cold, hunger, and obstinacy have done their work. He waits for the secret
orders.

Avenues in light Ebenezer sees. Near him they're still digging. He thinks:
When did I meet Samuel Lipker, when did I leave Palestine, is it still there,
what happened to the beautiful bougainvillea, did I ever really have bougainvillea? Maybe there really is a horizon near the church I saw yesterday
for the first time. For three years I didn't hear its bells. What do I remember? I've got to learn my life.

Then Ebenezer leaves the Red Cross hut. Somebody had already managed to draw a Star of David on the hut. Kramer is still sitting pensively.
A woman is standing over him and yelling: Say where they killed my children. Where did they kill them, there were three, Haimke, Ruha, and
Shmil, where did they kill them? Not far from here is a fine camp of officers, like a pastoral painting. It was here all the time, says Ebenezer, and
Ebenezer didn't know. They talk about distributing ration cards, updating,
registering, spraying, about food portions and medicine. Captain Wood is rather busy today. The blocks have almost all been destroyed. Old Jews set
up a synagogue in a tent. Look for a Torah scroll in the garbage. At night
a psychiatrist in a sailor's cap arrives. A woman stands above him and
looks at him. She's amazed at how he can sleep in that noise. Look how
he sleeps, he hasn't got dreams! And Captain Wood says: He'll understand,
he at least has to understand, got to find a way to separate between total
disbelief and reality, between life in London after the month of the blitz
we came out and found the fog, the street, that's what saved us, they've got
to start finding something and understanding. Ebenezer doesn't understand that the church exists! What are the Germans burying, asks the Red
Cross man, can I really examine every body? And how many bodies are
here? Ebenezer shuts his eyes and says: Abramovitch five, Avigovitch three,
Anishevitch two, Baborovsky three, Bennoam two, Bronovitch ... What is
he doing? asks Captain Wood and Samuel says: He's counting for you how
many there were here in the three years so you can examine the corpses
from the list. There's no need, yells Captain Wood, suddenly flushed, as if
the number of dead is meant to indict him, and he stops Ebenezer, who
opens his eyes. He looks and sees that the numbers he was about to deliver
are registered with surprising clarity on Kramer's face. Ebenezer tries to
maintain the barrier, he looks at the sky, a small plane lands not far from
here, he tries to find the sky as Captain Wood once found a street and fog.
Grass, cows grazing not far away, when did we see cows? He doesn't remember and isn't sure he really didn't see. Samuel is making deals with
soldiers, selling souvenirs, already inventing himself the lampshade made
from his parents, and selling it to them, and they weep quite a bit hearing
Samuel Lipker's story. By the end of the day, the story was practiced and
recited properly, without mistakes, from now on, he'll easily find the place
where the soldiers' tears of remorse flow and will make a deal that's not
bad. He understands that there's money in tear ducts. Kramer has now
turned into a landmark. Two steps from Kramer, on the right, there's a
psychiatrist who has gotten up and is trying to understand, to help. Let
him hold white underpants, says somebody. Why are they making a picnic
of all this? says Captain Wood in a moment of perplexity. The barbed wire
fence is already starting to totter, strewn with dead dogs who fled and were
electrocuted. People are washing, scared of the light. A little girl asks a soldier for candy and next to her stands a table full of candy. Hard to understand, thinks Ebenezer, but possible to peep, Fraulein Klopfer sits tied up
next to Kramer, lowers her eyes, and Samuel says to Captain Wood: When
they threw babies into the fire she took a baby, tossed it up and aimed
it so it would fall straight down, like a rock into water. You'd be amazed
how much a year-old baby wants to live and how he leaps and shrieks.
Look at her! That's how you'll find the street and the fog. A sunbeam
prances on the Germans digging. A blond boy with blue-gray eyes stands on
the edge of the pit and hands his father a sandwich. His face is transparent,
so fair. The father chews hungrily and mutters something, and the little girl
at the table, to the right of Kramer, swallows some chocolate and her face is
smeared, and an American soldier takes a picture of a little girl brown with
chocolate next to the DDT showers. Clouds float in the sky. How do you
guess, Fraulein Klopfer, thinks Captain Wood. She lifts her face and looks at
the dim glow of the horizon, valiant Germans are digging pits and filling
them with the dead, that destroyed harmony shatters in her a vital force that
Kramer is trying to suck out of the air as if he were waiting for dispatches,
the Fuhrer won't forsake us, he says confidently. Does Captain Wood understand the meaning that I'm not the Last Jew, that a disaster happened and
Samuel doesn't know who the disaster happened to? This is how a very powerful system is devised, says the psychiatrist.