Back to Life (21 page)

“I don’t know,” I sighed, feeling unsure and
a little dizzy. “You may feel that way but I’m sure Emanuel doesn’t. He had a chance to live out his dream and go play basketball in Italy.”

“Yeah he did. And he didn’t
get to go. And yes, that sucked. It was an opportunity that he lost because of a drunk driver, not because of you.” Emily leaned toward me, her eyes pleading with me to understand.

“Well
when I apologized to him, he kept yelling at me to explain my apology. He blames me for not being able to go to Italy.  I just—I don’t know. I know I’m responsible and I know it’s selfish, but I don’t want him to hate me.”

“Sahara, he doesn’t
blame you. We felt like we lost a part of us. You just left. And that didn’t just rock my world, it rocked his too.  Look at it from his point of view. He woke up from his coma and you were gone with no forwarding address.  I mean, it’s his business to tell, not mine. I just want you to understand that that’s what he meant about the apology. So believe me, he doesn’t hate you.”

“I didn’t think he would want to see me or hear from me
.  I had no idea. I really didn’t know. I didn’t. I called the hospital every day to check on his status. Once I knew he had woken up, that’s when I gave you my new email address.  If anything would’ve happened to him, I wouldn’t have forgiven myself.  And I know you and your family wouldn’t have forgiven me either. Did he really think I just left and didn’t give him a second thought while he was in a coma? No wonder he hates me,” I groaned miserably as I rubbed my temple.

Emily’s voice was low
when she started talking. “Listen… he doesn’t hate you.”

“I can take it Emily. I deserve it. I deserve it,” I repeated as I fought to keep the tears from falling.

“Sahara, Manny doesn’t hate you!” Emily growled in frustration.

Closing my eyes, I said, “I’ll give him the apology he deserves tomorrow. But I don’t kno
w how brunch is going to go.” I pressed my temples harder to stop the pounding.

Suddenly, Emily jumped to her feet
, startling me. My eyes followed her as she paced in front of the couch. “Emily...” I said slowly, not sure what had her on edge. “I’m still going to the brunch. I was just saying I don’t think Emanuel—”

“He loves you! He’s in love with you! He’
s never gotten over you Sahara!” Emily yelled with tears in her eyes.

My eyes widened.
Oh shit…

Chapter 20
   

I felt my heart pound in my chest as I processed what Emily just said.
He’s in love with me? He never got over me?
I thought incredulously. “What?” I asked. My mouth was slightly agape as I tried to understand the information that was just imparted on me.

The color drained from Emily’s face as she realized what she said. “
Oh no…no,” Emily uttered.  She plopped down on the couch beside me and put her head in her hands. “Forget I said that.”

“I don’t think I understand what you me
an Emily,” I whispered, my disbelief evident in my shocked tone of voice. I leaned forward and searched her face.

“
Sahara, I shouldn’t have said anything,” Emily said in a quiet voice. 

“
You said that he never got over me?” I put my hand over my chest, willing my heart rate to slow to normal pace. 

“Look, I shouldn’t have said anything.
It’s really early in the morning. We have to be up in a couple of hours to get ready for brunch.” Emily stood up, taking both of the empty teacups in her hands, and headed toward the kitchen.

Jumping up, I followed her
to the kitchen but didn’t go all the way in. “Emily, you can’t say something like that and not explain.”

Emily
rinsed the teacups out before she put them in the dishwasher.  She gripped the counter, bracing herself, as she looked straight ahead.  With her back to me, I could see her taking steady breaths as her narrow shoulders rose and fell. The stillness felt heavy in the room; it was stifling.  After a minute of unnerving silence, she turned around. I stood at the threshold of the kitchen, pulling at the drawstring of my sweatpants, anxiously awaiting some kind of explanation. 

She
took a deep breath before she began, “It’s not my story to tell, Sahara.” She chewed her lip nervously as she grabbed a pen and paper from a cabinet drawer. She scrawled something down before she said, “But please talk to him. Before the brunch. After the brunch. It doesn’t matter. Just please talk to him. Put him out of his misery.” 

She walked across the kitchen
and gave me a big hug. I hugged her back tightly. When we broke free, she handed me the paper with his number on it.  I recognized it immediately.
He’s had the same number for over ten years,
I thought as I eyed the familiar number. 

“Being able to talk to you tonight…finding out why you le
ft…why you didn’t share any of yourself with me for ten years… that was exactly what I needed,” Emily expressed with her voice wavering a bit.

Still feeling confused about everything, I dropped my eyes as I admitted, “I’m glad I’
m here. In Thomasville and with you.  I’m glad we talked. I’m sorry it has taken so long for me to get here. I was scared.” 

We walked arm in
arm down the hall and when I got to the guest bedroom, I looked directly into her grey eyes and said, “Thank you for not hating me.”

“You’re my best friend and my sister. I could never hate you. I just missed you.”

Two hours and no additional sleep later, I was showered and sitting on the edge of the bed.  I must have sat like that for longer than I realized because Emily knocked on the door and told me we should leave in 30 minutes to get to brunch on time. Taking the hint, I pulled myself out of the haze I’d been in since the conversation with Emily. 

I picked out
a white stretch knit tank dress that fell just below the knee. I paired it with a black short sleeved summer sweater and black ballet slippers.  I tamed my hair by pinning one side away from my face. I adorned the pinned side with two white silk flowers.  I completed the look with diamond studs and a solitary diamond necklace.
Ty’s birthday gift for me,
I thought as I realized I didn’t call him all morning. 
Well he is probably sleeping in, nursing a hangover from his night out with the boys. I should send him a text and let him know I’m going to do brunch and that I’ll call him later,
I thought. 

“Sahara, you almost ready?”
Emily called from the other side of the door.

“Just give me one minute,” I replied as I picked up my cell phone and started
a text to Ty.

Sahara Lee: Good morning! I hope you had a great time last night. I’m sure you and the boys
had more than just one last night so sleep it off. I look forward to talking to you later. I’m going to do brunch and then see where the day takes me. I love you.

Hitting send, I tucked my phone in the pocket fold of my
black and white Phillip Lim color-blocked bag.  I grabbed my black oversized sunglasses and headed out the door.  I stopped in my tracks as soon as I got to the living room.  Standing in the same white stretch knit tank dress, Emily had her back to me as she concluded her phone call.  Emily paired her dress with a teal belt and teal shoes.  Her black hair was twisted into a high bun that sat solidly on the crown of her head.  She wore a teal and purple checkered scarf loosely tied around her neck and she was holding a teal clutch. 

Turning around, Emily screamed. “Are you kidding me?!” She laughed so hard that she doubled over. I joined in and we stared at each other and laughed for what felt like 5 whole minutes. 

“What are the odds?” I said as I gestured to our dresses. “You look beautiful, by the way.”

“You look amazing! Your—or better yet—our dress looks good on you. This is just nuts! I should change but we don’t have time!” Emily laughed again.

“Well I’m sure no one will even be able to tell…” I laughed as I finished the sentence knowing that everyone would be able to tell. “At least we look good. Who cares, right?”

“Right!”
Emily smiled widely.  “And it’ll be just like old times. We used to buy the same clothes all the time, remember?”

The last time we wore the same thing, we ended up in the hospital,
I reminded myself.  That sobered me up quickly.

Emily must have noticed because she walked over to me and held my hand. “We
are okay.” I looked at her and gave her a small smile.

She continued, “We have to be at Rosemary’s by 11 or we will never hear the end of it.”

Following her out the front door, I only saw the white Acura Emanuel picked me up in.  I pointed to car, “Is Emanuel here?”

“No, I let Emanuel use my car. He has a motorcycle and your luggage was not going to fit on that thing,” she joked.

“Ohhhh… Well, how did you get home from work?” I asked as I slid into the car, my dress slipping easily over the leather seats. 

After she buckled her seatbelt, Emily said, “My doctor boyfriend.” Her smile showcas
ed pure bliss as she started the engine. 

“You didn’t mention him in the emails! Tell me more.”

“Girl, I told you this whole year has been busy with me still working full time and the dance studio opening up,” she explained even though she didn’t need to.
It’s not like I’ve told her anything about my life,
I thought as I fingered the necklace around my neck.

“I understand. You don’t owe me an explanation.
At all. I’m sorry. But now that you’ve brought him up, I’d love to hear any and everything you’d want to tell me about him,” I clarified, pulling my sunglasses down my nose so she could see my eyes and know that I meant my apology.

“Don’t apologize to me anymore today
, okay?” Emily retorted with a smile. “Today is about enjoying the here and now with my best friend, okay?”

“Okay,
” I acquiesced. “Now—doctor boyfriend?”

“
So it’s only a couple of months old, but I met him when I was doing prep stuff for surgery—”

“Wait
, what kind of surgery?” I asked concerned.

“Exploratory stuff.
  Sometimes I get excruciating pain out of nowhere. It feels like a never ending charley horse.  You know I have these metal rods in my legs.  Well my doctor ordered some tests to make sure the rods in my legs weren’t irritating the tendons or something. I don’t know. Long story short, he didn’t find anything. But while I was there for prep work this last time, I met Anthony.  He was in the parking lot at the same time as me. We both thought the other was a visitor and we talked for a little bit and exchanged numbers before going our separate ways.  Come to find out, he was new in town and just accepted a position with the hospital.”

“
Only you would go to the hospital for test results and leave out with a doctor…nice! Get it girl! Tell me about him.”

“He’s a nice guy! I like spending time with him…when I see him. His hours are crap. But with me being out of school for the summer, it should be better. I’m still trying to figure out if
I can really deal with the hours or if I’m just tolerating them so I can say ‘my doctor boyfriend.’” Emily laughed.

I joined in
with her laughter and replied, “You are a mess!” After I stopped laughing I said, “But really, those doctor shows make it seem like the doctors never really get home to their significant others.  Hopefully it’s different in real life.”

Emily shrugged, “I don’t know. We’ll see. Right now it’s fun.
If it stops being fun, I’ll reevaluate my feelings.”

“I know that’s right.”

“Enough about me, I want to know about you! Is there a lucky guy in your life? Sorry,” Emily apologized as her phone rang. Glancing down, she hurriedly picked up call.

“Hey mom…We’re about to pull up… Calm down, we are not late… Yes… Yes… Okay we will see you in literally one minute… Love you too… You can tell her yourself in less than 60 seconds. Bye!” Emily hit the end button and threw her phone back in the cup holder.

“Sorry about that. Mom is freaking out because we aren’t there yet.”

“Are we close?” I asked.

“Yes, it is right there! And we have a good 6 minutes before our reservation is technically supposed to start. You know how she is though.”

I knew how she was but it’s been
ten years. People change. I sure did,
I pondered as I started to feel anxious about the brunch.

As Emily parked in the parking space, I noticed a shiny black motorcycle
circling around the parking lot. The motorcycle was a mix of black and chrome and the rider handled it well. I couldn’t be sure, but if my heart rate was any indication, I knew the motorcyclist had to be Emanuel. We got out of the car just as he was settling in a spot near the front door. 

I watched as he got off the bike.  His long dark denim clad legs
expertly jumped off the black and chrome machine, landing on heavy black boots.  His broad shoulders and narrow waist were accentuated by the black and silver motorcycle jacket.  He stripped his jacket off first, showcasing a red and black checkered button up. Then he removed his helmet, briefly setting it on the handlebar of the motorcycle.  He ran his hands through his hair and instantly his hair was back to being perfect. He picked his helmet back up and then headed into Rosemary’s.

Emily cleared her throat. I looked at her and she was beaming at me.  Clearly, I’d been caught staring.

“I see nothing has changed…” Emily sang as she started walking toward the restaurant. 

I convinced my feet to walk and my eyes to stop checking out Emanuel
retreating frame. “What are you talking about?” I asked with mock indignation.

“You two were the worst! Always watching each other, finding reasons to touch each other, inviting each other to places I know neither of you would have ever wanted to go.
Remember when he took us to the botanical gardens?!”  I laughed in response.

She continued, “I mean, obviously, you’ve loved Manny—oh excuse me—you’ve loved Emanuel since like first grade.” Emily impersonated my
voice as she said his full name. “But when he started crushing on you back, you two were unbearable!” Emily laughed.

I couldn’t help but laugh at her laughing at me. We finally calmed down and I realized we were walking in.  I suddenly felt light headed and I braced myself on the wall
near the hallway that led to the smoking patio and restroom.

“You okay?”
Emily asked, her face concerned.

“I just need a second.”
I leaned my shoulder against the wall to keep myself upright.

“Take all the time you need. You need me to get you some water? Or do you want Manny to come and—Hey Manny!” Emily’s
face turned pink and her voice raised a few octaves as she greeted her brother, obviously surprised by him popping up behind us. “I thought you were already seated.”

“Hey,” Emanuel said warily, glancing between us.
“I checked my jacket and helmet with the coat check.” I must have looked nervous because he said, “It’s going to be okay. It’s just us.” Putting his hand on the small of my back, I felt a jolt run through me. I looked at Emanuel first and then at Emily and saw her smile.  

“Manny, make sure Sahara’s okay
. I’m going to let Mom and Dad know we are here. You know Mom’s probably freaking out. It’s 11:02!” She gave us a wink and turned on her heel.