Banes (20 page)

She laughed, "You suck at this. Look my memory is full of shit."

He closed himself off, "Oh. You want to be with Ben still?"

She shook her head, "No I mean the other, other me is a church girl goody two shoes. Not my thing. I'm a jock. I like sports. I like nature and hiking and animals not orphans and street kids. I don’t like talking about my feelings. I don’t know how I feel about church and god." She sighed, "I don’t feel that way about Ben. There is something there, it's not me though. I'm the one in control. The memories are just that memories but my body and my feelings aren’t confused."

He looked confused, "You suck at this too."

She nodded looking at his dark brow shaggy hair and green eyes and melted.

He smiled, "You love me?"

She smiled back biting her lip, "Well if you're still you then yeah maybe but if you're the asshat who was super mean to me downstairs then no."

He laughed, "Asshat, nice language. Not so churchy as I remember you."

"That’s what I'm saying, this new me has dreams like The effing Sound of Music. I mentally scold myself when I curse. She's insane, too grateful to the church. I like that I'm regular. I don’t like extremes of anything. I mean why did you like me?"

His eyes lowered as a grin crept across his lips, "Well I didn’t at first. I thought you were this annoying church girl who was too preachy and too moral, which sounds worse than I mean it to. But then sometimes I would see this other side of you, like when you ran. You were different. Closed off and quiet."

"I just wish I grew up in my life. I wish it was just me in here."

"Yeah you're kinda schizo. It's weird."

She took a bite and made a face at him.

He laughed stealing a bite of her pancake.

She watched him, there was something behind his eyes. Something he wasn’t saying.

"What's wrong?"

He shrugged, "Nothing? What?"

"You look sad kinda."

He shook his head, "Ben. You know he'll be super pissed and shit if you break up with him."

"You think I should date him falsely, pretending to be into him when I'm not? If he touches me I will probably vomit. It would be like my brother touching me." She shivered at the thought.

"No of course not. I just don’t want my brother hurt." His green eyes were dazzling. She moved the tray of food and crawled to where he sat.

She put a hand on his shoulder, "We need to take this one day at a time. Three days ago when I got here I was your girlfriend, we were together. My whole world is upside down now. Me and Aimee hardly seem to be friends, everything is a mess."

He frowned, "You and Aimee were friends?"

"Best, I was there when she got back together with Shane. I was the one who talked her into it."

"Wow you're from like another planet, her and Shane? You mean that cop she dated in high school?"

Ari sighed, "Oh my god, she's not with Shane?"

He shook his head, "No dude, she's with Aleks. Has been for like six months."

Ari picked up her cell phone from her bedside table and rifled through it, "Jesus I don’t even have her in my phone. Didn’t she take me to Roses?"

He laughed, "Yeah she mystery travels us all over, part of her job. I think she's always kinda disliked you though. She's very into science not religion."

Ari sighed again exasperated, "God I wish everyone would stop seeing me like that. I'm not her."

"Ari you are her to us, that’s all we've known."

"Yeah well it's not what I am."

He leaned over looking at her lips. She felt the air suck from the room as she felt his gaze heating her mouth like lasers. He leaned in but his lips just grazed her mouth as a knock at the door interrupted. She flushed as he pulled back. His face changed, hardening as he climbed off her bed.

He walked to the door and opened it.

Ben dove through the door knocking Lucas to the ground. Both phased instantly. Suddenly Ari was in her room screaming as the two huge wolves snarled and wrestled.

"STOP THIS, STOP. HELP SOMEONE!"

She leapt off the bed to run from the room but the dark wolf she knew was Ben smashed his back end into hers as the brown wolf pushed him with his hind legs. She stumbled smashing her face into the wall. She saw stars as her legs tried to steady themselves. Her hands heated instantly. She turned looking at the wolves and fell forward. They ignored her as she fell fighting the black that threatened to take her. Her hands pumped out instantly upon grazing their fur. Both wolves fell to the ground. She crawled to Lucas, scared he had been hurt by his angry brother. He curled himself around her as the black took them both.

She looked around her hearing voices in the distance. They were angry and arguing.

"She's wearing herself out. She just needs some rest."

"No Lydia she's meddling in our lives and it has to stop. The way she remembers the world from her yesterday, I sort of remember it too. It's almost like I can see the changes she's made. I feel like I'm losing my mind."

Ari winced imagining what it must be like for them all to have their lives changed against their will.

"Well we need to ask her everything that’s been changed and try to fix the things we can."

Ari closed her eyes trying to ignore the fact she desperately wished she hadn’t gone to the orphanage. It was impossible to wish away the happiness of the children even if it meant she screwed up everything else.

Her churchy brain full of the sweet Sound of Music styled comments just pissed her off more. She pulled herself up from her comfortable bed hoping Annabelle wasn’t watching her and crept to the window of the dark room. She pulled back the drapes and lifted the window. She crawled along the roofline looking out at the gray day. The depressing sight of the mist in the air and the low sitting clouds made her smile knowingly as she formed a plan. Her heart would break but at least her damage on the lives of those around her would be minimal.

She jumped down from the lowest point and ran along the property. She expected between the ghost, the psychic and two wolves she would never make a clean get away not to even mention the possibility of demons and angels. She moved silently feeling the training she didn’t realize the new her had kicking in and helping her. She was faster and quieter but also her eyes naturally darted about the forest out of self-preservation not defense. There were no walls in the new Ari, there was no pain and suffering. Her open mind showed years of advanced training in combat and many other things Ari couldn’t comprehend. It was like landing in the body of a spy. She smiling thinking about Jason Bourne as she ran to the road passing through the guards. She ran as fast as she could as the awareness of what exactly it was that lived beyond the guards was suddenly in the back of her mind.

Her legs pumped hard as her lungs expanded allowing the air to energize her. The runners high was instantly boosting her. She was stunned by the feeling of the maintained runners high.

She pushed the thought of Lucas out of her mind desperate to convince herself that everyone would be better off.

She ran to the bus stop and caught the bus to downtown. The ride was filled with feelings she couldn’t explain. She felt apprehension of leaving Lydia's even if it was really the only home she had but she was relieved to be away from the chaos of choosing Lucas and hurting Ben. Her chest hurt thinking about Lucas. She couldn’t bear the thought of being without him after they'd just worked everything out but at the same time she couldn't imagine tearing him and his brother apart.

She recognized the area and hopped off the bus at the next stop. The neighborhood was fancy. She looked at the huge houses, some even had gates and driveways so long you couldn’t see the house from the street.

She walked up the road looking for the house she remembered deep inside of herself from her previous memories from the angry Ari. The house was huge, it looked like a hotel. It was as big as the orphanage. She walked up the driveway to the front door. Her stomach did circles making her nauseous. She took a deep breath and walked up to the huge wooden door and knocked.

A woman wearing a black and white maid uniform came to the door. She had dark hair and looked about forty-five. She smiled at Ari expectantly, "Can I help you?"

Ari smiled back, "I'm looking for Vince."

The woman looked at her suspiciously and nodded, "Come in. Stay here and I will get him. Who should I say is here?"

Ari frowned, "My name is Ari." The question sounded ridiculous. The woman nodded and left the room.

Ari stood in the front entryway of the massive mansion and waited for her uncle.

The maid returned and pointed down the hall, "He'll meet with you in his study."

Ari smirked imagining her uncle with a study. She followed the woman down a wide and elegant looking hallway to a large arched entrance. The study was more like a living room but it had a large wooden desk in one corner.

Her uncle stood seeing her walk in. He looked much older than he had in the desert. His new life must have been very hard on him.

"Mr. Pastern this is Miss Ari. Can I get you something to eat or drink?"

Vince shook his head just as Ari did and the maid vanished.

Her uncle's eye revealed his awareness of her existence. Pain and curiosity filled his eyes, "Ari what a wonderful surprise." His voice cracked slightly.

She wanted to cry and run to him like she had as a child whenever she had hurt herself or was scared. He didn’t look the same as he had, his cold stare prevented her feet from budging.

His smile faded, "You look just like her."

Her heart broke, "You're lying. I know I don’t look like her. I know only my hair is like hers."

He looked confused, "How do you know what she looked like?"

She swallowed hard, "You'll never believe this but there was once a world where my mother begged you from her death bed to keep me and raise me as your own. She told you to move far far away and leave the city for my safety. She begged you to love me as your own. In that world you did as she asked. You raised me and loved me like a daughter."

His face cringed in defiance as anger filled his voice, "You couldn’t possibly know any of that. I don’t owe you anything."

She shrugged, "I don’t want anything from you except an answer. Who was my father?"

His lower lip trembled, he wasn’t the man who raised her. He was weak now. He ran a hand through his fluffy hair, "He was some man your mom met at the bar she was working at. He had a British accent. He was tall and fit. You have his eyes, black as night. I only met him once."

Ari gulped suddenly realizing she knew exactly who he spoke of, "Dorian?"

He nodded, "Yeah that was his name. Anyway he was gone long before your mom even knew she was pregnant. Her pregnancy was bad, she spent the entire thing in the hospital." His face hardened, "I tried to convince her to abort the, well the baby but she wouldn’t."

Ari felt her face revealing the pain in the story her uncle never spoke before. He had loved her then and would never have hurt her that way.

"Why was she in danger? Why did she tell you to run with me?"

She paced around the room, "She started to go crazy, she was delirious and kept saying that something evil wanted the baby. Like some doomsday end of world bullshit. You were poisoning her."

Ari flinched back feeling her hands heating up. She wanted to send him back but her world was such a mess she didn’t dare try that again. As much as she wanted to be in the desert with him hugging her again instead of telling her she murdered her own mother.

She took a deep breath, "What did you see? I know you saw something." Her uncle had run with her to the desert and never looked back, he'd lied about where they were from. She knew he had done it out of fear.

He looked at her wildly, "You, you were different. I saw you. She gave birth to you and the doctors had to work on her. They gave you to me. I saw it then. You never cried, you looked at me and you knew me. I saw the world in your eyes. I saw what was about to happen. I saw her die and then the doctor came out of the room and told me she'd died. I saw a man in a trench coat walking down the hallway looking for her. It was so fast. Suddenly the doctor came out of the room and said exactly what I'd seen in your eyes. I knew then she was right. Something evil was looking for you. I hid you at the orphanage hoping god would protect you."

She watched his panicked face as she walked toward him and pulled the pinkie ring off her middle finger. She placed it on the desk. She nodded and walked from the room.

"Where, how did you get that? I thought I lost it."

She spoke not facing him, "You did."

"Where are you going?"

She turned around to see the fear in his face, "You abandoned me as a baby afraid of my world." She shook her head, "It hasn’t gotten less dangerous."

She walked back the way the maid had brought her and walked from the huge house. She wished things could be the way they were but she knew so much more about herself and she knew the truth. No matter how bad things got she was grateful for the truth. The truth hadn’t killed her it had made her stronger. She knew she was a fighter for the first time. She was a Rose. Her finger felt bare without her uncles ring but the Roses ring meant more now that her other lives were gone forever.