Bang Up: Prison walls don't just keep criminals in, the keep the outside world at bay (13 page)

Rachel flicked invisible dust from her black leggings. They were cheap and cheerful and something she picked up from Primark when she was in Manchester last. You could see her scabby knickers through the thin black material too; her skanky underwear was ready for the bin. There was no way she was giving her the time of the day anymore, she was doing her head in. Rachel’s voice went higher. “I said it’s over didn’t I! Just be quiet and let’s get this visit over and done with. Our Mikey loves us both, so for now just let’s keep him happy and not stress him out.” Sarah sucked in a large mouthful of air and her chest expanded. She nodded slowly at Rachel and the war seemed to be over for now.

Rachel smirked as she watched Gary go to the toilets to conceal the parcel. The visitors centre was clean and bright, which made a big change from what she was used to on previous visits. Usually, these places were a shit-tip with stinking toilets, scruffy chairs and snotty kids running around crying their eyes out. Rachel clocked her surroundings. There were children’s toys in the corner of the room and a flat screen TV secured firmly on the wall. This was one of the best centres Rachel had ever visited and she felt at ease knowing she was warm and sat in a nice place before she went to see her son. Reaching over to a table nearby Sarah picked up a newspaper written by HMP inmates. It was distributed throughout the country and most criminals read it to pass a few hours. Opening the pages, she started to read the news inside the prison world. Her eyes were wide open as her expression changed. Rachel snarled over at her and shook her head. What did this girl know about her world? Fuck all! She didn’t have a clue what it was like to suffer.

Sarah wiped her eyes as tears started rolling down her cheek. She lifted her head up and choked up as she passed the newspaper over to Rachel. Her finger pointed at a piece in the paper. “Please read this poem here that an inmate has written. It’s heartbreaking, just read it and you’ll see. Honest, it’s really pulled at my heartstrings.” Rachel knew what kind of poems were inside this paper. When she was doing her time she used to read it religiously. Everyone did. The poems were written by inmates and some of the verses were really good. It’s amazing how people can find the words to describe their pain when they are locked away from their loved ones. Rachel used to cry reading this newspaper back in the day. There was one piece in particular that still stuck in her mind and it was about an inmate writing to her children back home asking them for forgiveness for the life she’d led them in to. Each criminal locked away behind prison walls always had regrets about the choices they’d made in life. Prison life broke them and all that was left for some inmates was raw emotion that made them feel weak and vulnerable. Rachel had written a few articles whilst she was doing her time too but she never showed them to anyone. These were her private thoughts and nobody was ever getting inside her head to see the real her. She’d been hurt too many times in the past to ever expose her inner feelings again. Rachel cast her eyes over the verse. She was just reading it to be polite, she didn’t digest any of the words. Passing it back over to Sarah she raised her eyes. “Life, innit. Words said inside a jail cell mean nothing on the outside love. It’s just jail talk. Ask a few of the girls sat here about it,” she jerked her head forward at the girls sat waiting in the corner of the room. Rachel continued in a low voice. “They’ll tell you all about it. I’m sure they’ve probably heard buckets of it. Meaningless shit it is, a load of crap. I should know, I’ve been there and got the t-shirt so to speak.”

Sarah held her head to the side and whispered over to Rachel. “I do want to learn about how you lived your life if you will let me. I won’t judge you. You just have to trust me. After all, we’re family now.”

Rachel nearly choked. Was this girl on this fucking planet or what? How on earth did she think she could say something like that? Rachel was just about to give her a bollocking when Gary came back into the room, he saved Sarah from a mouthful of abuse. All it took was one look over at him and she knew the job was done. The drugs were stashed, plugged right up his arsehole. The officer in charge started to shout out inmates’ surnames and the visitors made their way over to the exit. They were all nattering and straightening their clothes. Some of the younger girls were dressed up to the nines; their arses hanging out and tits popping out of their bras. Sarah got excited as they started to walk over to the main prison. Her eyes were everywhere. “Is he in there, what part is he in? How many prisoners will we see today? Are there any criminals doing life sentences?” Sarah was doing everyone’s head in. Even Gary, who was usually laid back, was getting sick of her now. She was hard work. He had to keep a straight head and she was spooking him out with all her questions. Sarah latched on to some other visitors and they could hear her waffling on behind them as they all entered the main prison. The security checks now began. All the doors were locked and each of them were being watched eagerly, there was CCTV and officers all over the joint. Once the visitors came through the main doors it was time to be searched. This was the point of no return, there was no going back. Everything the visitors had in their possession had to be put in a small grey dish and placed on a table. No notes were allowed inside the jail, just loose change. There was a vending machine in the centre and visitors were allowed to buy drinks and chocolates for their loved ones. Mikey loved chocolate. He had a right sweet tooth and when he was craving sugar he could eat loads of it. He loved thick, creamy chocolate, a Mars bar was his favourite. He always said the chocolate bar had everything he needed in one bite. Rachel often treated him to his addiction when they’d had words. All she had to do was place one on the table near him and he knew she was sorry for whatever havoc she’d caused. Rachel and Mikey knew each other inside out. They didn’t have to say a word to each other. All it ever took was a look to know how the other was feeling.

Sarah huddled in behind Rachel as their turn came to be searched. Mikey’s mother knew the script inside out and her spine tingled at the memory of her stretch inside a similar big house. She stretched her arms out ready to be frisked, her face was frozen. Gary licked his dry cracked lips, his head was spinning. His eyes were all over looking for the sniffer dog. If that scruffy mutt came anywhere near him he was going to boot it right up the arse. He’d concealed the drugs well but there was always that small chance that they would be detected by the hound. Rachel smiled at the female officer. “Am I all done now, love?”

The screw nodded. “Yes, just go and wait at the other door until the rest of the visitors are ready.”

Rachel picked up her loose change and shoved it back inside her pocket. “Fucking miserable lesbian,” she growled under her breath. Mikey’s mam stood with her back against the wall and chewed the side of her fingernail. She clocked the female screw and wondered how many times she’d actually found something on a visitor, probably none. It was just a basic search, a pat down. Sarah was chuckling as her body search began. This girl couldn’t keep her big trap shut for a minute. This was a big adventure for her and she was taking in everything around her. “Do you ever find anything when you’re searching the visitors?” The female officer raised a smile but there was no way she was getting into a conversation about it. This was confidential information and she wasn’t willing to discuss it. Rachel let out a laboured breath from where she stood and shot a look over at Sarah. She was so on top, a fucking busybody. She was bringing attention to them.

Gary walked past and stood with his arms out as the male officer began to search him. He knew the script and tried to get it over as soon as possible. If this screw would have suspected anything he would have sent him into another room where they would examine him with a wand. The wand was the nickname of a device they used to scan visitors for any trace of drugs. This included people who smoked weed, or who had recently been in contact with it. These visitors usually had their visits cancelled at this point if any evidence of drug use was found on them. This was a zero tolerance jail and the officers were all on the ball. Nobody was trusted. The price on the outside to bring a parcel inside any jail was about two hundred quid, usually the junkies would take the chance to take stuff in. They were desperate for some extra cash and would do anything for it, even risk their own freedom. Jail meant fuck all to them; it was three meals a day and a roof over their head. It was more than any of them had on the outside. But money was short and Rachel’s boyfriend’s neck was on the line this time. He hated taking chances but Rachel had pressured him into doing it. Fuck Mikey Milne! He needed to sort his own shit out and man up. All of a sudden now Mikey was banged up he had his mother running around after him. She never usually gave a flying fuck and now she was acting like the mother of the year. It was a joke.

Gary finished his body search and gave the security guard a shifty look as he walked away. The coast was clear for now and everything was going to plan. Rachel gasped as he made his way to her side. “Thank fuck that’s over,” he whispered under his breath. Sarah was taking everything in, her head was all over the show looking at every detail. As they walked through another doorway they could see the grounds of the prison from where they stood; thick metal fencing with sharp jagged blades of metal sticking from the top of it. Sarah was mesmerised by it all and Gary had to give her a gentle shove to keep her moving. She was at it again. “I can only imagine how hard it is for Mikey in here Rachel. I never really thought of prison in this way. It’s shocking, it’s really opened my eyes.”

Rachel pushed her in the small of her back and hurried her along. “Will you turn it in? Honest to God, give me strength! Just move your arse and let’s get up to the waiting room.” For the second time today Gary agreed with his girlfriend. He wanted this parcel passed over as soon as possible. He knew he’d put his freedom at risk and he was starting to regret the risk he’d taken. But it was too late, there was no turning back. Drug smuggling into any jail carried a heavy sentence. Three years, sometimes more. It was no walk in the park, this was serious shit.

Gary sat down and stared at the grey door facing him. He knew that any time soon he would be in the main visiting centre and Mikey would be there waiting for him. Looking about, he clocked the other people sat there and nudged Rachel in the waist. “Look at the state of her, fuck me she looks as rough as a bear’s arse. Wouldn’t you have thought she would have made a bit of an effort to come here? I bet she’s got a right sweaty arse crease?”

Rachel pulled her jacket around her body and dipped her head, she smiled slightly. She was just as bad as the other woman and realised now how scruffy she looked as well. Scraping her hair back from her face she tucked it behind her ears. She was paranoid about her appearance and started to pull the white pieces of fluff from her leggings. Sarah was in her element. She was watching everything that what was going on. This was another world to her and she was fascinated by it. Her mother had spoken to her about people less fortunate than themselves and whenever she saw a charity box she always put spare change inside it. There were small children crying and everyone was eager to get inside to see their loved ones. The mothers were getting frustrated and one woman ragged her son about on the spot to calm him down. “If you carry on fucking about I’ll slap your arse, just turn it in,” she whispered at him as she squeezed at his hand. Then they could hear the sound of keys jangling. Everybody was on edge, eyes fixed firmly on the door. The visitors stood up as the door opened fully. It was a stampede of bodies rushing to get inside the room.

Sarah moved quickly and stood next to Rachel to avoid being crushed. She was excited. “Is this it, is he in here?” Sarah flicked her eyes about the large room. There were men sat at tables wearing red bibs over their clothes. A group of officers were situated at the front of the room. They were higher up than the rest of the tables, enabling them to get a good look at what was going on. And stuff would go on too, lots of illegal contraband would be passed about. There were women wanking their boyfriends off and inmates trying to get a quick grope of the Jack and Danny when nobody was looking. Sarah screamed out at the top of her voice. People were looking at her, she was behaving like a right dickhead, she had to calm down. Then, through a sea of faces, there he was, her Mikey - her heart’s desire. With a shrieking tone she ran to his table.

“Mikey! My Mikey!”

Rachel shook her head and turned to Gary at the side of her. “Is there any need for her big gob? She’s a bleeding embarrassment. It’s the last time I’m coming here with her I can tell you now. She’s been a nightmare. What a daft bitch! He needs to cart her and get someone bleeding normal because she’s up it.” Gary’s head was in the game now and he wasn’t really listening to a word she said. He swallowed hard and made his way to sit at the table. Sarah hugged Mikey and as predicted she broke down crying. She was drawing attention to them and Rachel snapped. She gripped the top of her shoulder and sank her fingers deep into her shoulder blade. “Sarah, just sit down, you drama queen. We spoke about this before didn’t we? Mikey doesn’t need to see you in this state does he?” Mikey prised her fingers from around his shoulders and asked her to sit down facing him. The screw was at his table and he had a sour expression. He had a job to do and no one was pissing on his parade. “Can you sit down, Miss? You’re not allowed on the same side as the inmate. If it happens again your visit will be over.”

Sarah held a puzzled look. “I’m his girlfriend. Surely I’m allowed to comfort him?”

“I don’t care if you’re Princess Diana, sweetheart. You still stay on the right side of the table or you’ll be removed from the visit.”

Gary was white and the stress was starting to show. He gave the eye to Mikey and let him know the goods were on his person. Mikey quickly diffused the situation. “No worries boss. She’ll stay on that side for the rest of the visit. She’s just a bit upset that’s all. You know how these women get when they see us for the first time.”