Beautifully Broken

Copyright
©
2012 By Amanda Bennett

All
right reserved. Printed in the United States

No part
of this book may be used or reproduced in any form or by any means

electronic
or mechanical, including photocopying, recording or by any

information
storage and retrieval systems, without prior written permission

of the
author except where permitted by law.

The
characters and events portrayed in this book are fictitious.

Any
similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not

intended
by the author.

Cover By Amanda Bennett

For my son Christian and Lincoln, without your
undying love I would be incomplete.

For my
brother Cory and sister Stephanie, thank you for always loving me despite my
faults. Life would have been quite boring without

the both
of you.

And
lastly, Thank You to Marsha Savery, my high school English teacher. Your love
for your students is unprecedented. You taught me how to believe in my work,
while encouraging me to be a better version of myself. I will forever be
grateful for you.

Inspiration
comes in many forms and for that I am thankful to all of the people in my life,
who have one way or another provided me with the insight and courage to keep
doing what I love to do.

Prologue

One

Two

Three

Four

Five

Six

Seven

Eight

Nine

Ten

Eleven

Twelve

Thirteen

Fourteen

Fifteen

Sixteen

Seventeen

Eighteen

Nineteen

Twenty

Twenty-One

Twenty-Two

Twenty-Three

Twenty-Four

Twenty-Five

Twenty-Six

Prologue

You can’t always predict what
will happen in life. I think some of my best memories are of very unpredictable
events. The one’s you never see coming, but that make your life that much more
worth living. I think on some level, I always knew that I was in love with him.
Who wouldn’t be? He was beautiful in a very understated way, smart, witty and
had the kindest heart I had ever known. He was always the popular boy, and
girls would spend their entire high school career throwing themselves at him.

We had known each other since
the summer before fifth grade, and had been inseparable ever since, at least
until now. I should have told him how much I loved him. I would have given my
life to have him love me back, without hesitation. I honestly think, that deep
down I knew how much he loved me, just as I knew how much I loved him. That’s
the thing about life; you never know when yours will get cut short.

I know now that I should have
confided in him, he would have understood, that’s just who he is. There would
have never been a look of disgust or pity in his beautiful blue eyes. I
underestimated him and myself, as individuals, as best friends and as lovers.
That’s the thing about death, it will open your eyes to the most unforgiving
things you never knew about yourself. Who would have thought at twenty-two I
would find out just how true that statement could be, and the weight that it
would carry.

I pulled into the parking lot of
the high school feeling a great sense of accomplishment. I did it! I had made
it through the last year of my high school career unscathed. It was our last
day of school before graduation and I was elated. I jumped out of my beat up
Toyota Corolla and headed towards Gray’s beautifully lifted Chevy truck. I
practically skipped my way into my best friend’s long, muscular waiting arms.
Lunging myself into his big burly arms I was beyond grateful to have known this
wonderful boy almost my whole life. He hugged me back without trepidation and
with true joy. I couldn’t help but squeeze his muscular neck as I planted a
swift kiss against his unshaved cheek.

“We did it Gray! Can you believe
it? We actually made it out alive!” I giggled as he gently placed me back onto
the asphalt parking lot. “I couldn’t have done it without you.” I smiled up at
him. His blue eyes shining back at me.

“I know, right? Come on, let’s
go get this day over with.” He grinned down at me as I laced my arm through
his.

As we walked through the front
doors of the school we were about to leave behind, the sadness of it all it
suddenly hit me. This is the last time that we would walk through these halls
together. The last time we would sit through Mr. Rows boring ass algebra class.
The last time we were going to sit and eat lunch under the old oak trees, and
the last time he and I would be together all day, everyday.

I missed him already. Just
thinking of him heading off to the police academy and me heading off to college
made me want to run away and cry. I stole a look at him through my veil of
hair, and noticed the forlorn look that he was wearing on his face. It matched
my mood and I knew exactly how he felt. He glanced down at me at that moment,
and I could feel the longing running through each of our veins.

As we approached our lockers,
four members of the ‘oh-so-gorgeous’ cheerleading squad come bounding towards
us. I wish I could say that this wasn’t a regular occurrence, but I would be
lying. Ever since freshman year when Gray started growing into his six foot
three frame, filling it out with muscles upon muscles, all the girls started
taking notice. It was like someone sent out a memo to every hormonal teenage
girl that Gray was single, and filling out quite nicely.

Gray had always been something
to look at. The summer after eighth grade he went from five foot nine and
gangly, to an athletic six foot three. He let his copper brown hair grow out a
bit, so it now sat longer on top and shorter on the sides. He never let it get
too untidy or too long and for that I was grateful. Along with sky blue eyes,
he also had a strong squared jaw and amazingly long black eyelashes. I have to
admit, Gray was HOT!

I wish I could say my changes
happened right along with Gray’s, but I wasn’t as lucky. Freshman year I went
through the inevitable awkward phase that most girls go through. By the end of
sophomore year, I was finally fitting in with the rest of the girls at school.
I started filling out my five foot eight inch frame with all the right curves.
I let my auburn hair grow out so it skimmed the top of my waistband, and I
figured out how to apply the right amount of makeup.

Of course I had to teach myself,
but through trial and error and some assholish remarks from Gray along the way,
I figured it out. I had spent my summers working as a lifeguard at the local
water park, so I had a nice tan that I made sure to keep up with throughout the
winter months. I wouldn’t say that I was as good looking as Gray, but I think I
measured up quite nicely with the pretty girls in school.

I rolled my eyes at Gray as I turned
to open my locker. He just smirked and leaned against his locker awaiting the
girls’ arrival. “Hey ladies how are we today?” He knew the effect he has on
these girls and he totally used it to his advantage,
constantly
. I couldn’t help but laugh at them under my breath before wandering off
to find some of my other friends. Of course, as I turned to leave all I could
hear was them swooning over the almighty Gray.

I made sure not to look back at
Gray and his “groupies” as I headed down hallway B to go find Hannah. It only
fuels the Gray fire if I watch, so I kept my head down. As I rounded the corner
I spotted Hannah mingling with some of the underclassman. Seconds later I was
running right into what could only be described as a brick wall. The books and
papers I was holding against my chest went flying across the hall in every
direction. I stood staring at the ground in disbelief, getting ready to rage
out on whatever imbecile decided to not watch where the hell they were going
today.

“You have got to be kid-” The
sentence literally vanished from my mouth as I found myself staring up into the
deepest chocolate brown eyes I had ever seen. They were literally smoldering,
and burning a hole through my pale gray eyes. Before I had a chance to let
myself recover, he was speaking and I was rendered speechless.

“Are you okay?” His voice was
deep and rugged, and I couldn’t take my eyes off of him. “Hello? I said are you
okay?” I finally tuned into what he was saying but could only nod my head.

I watched intently as he bent
his, what has to be at least six foot two frame, down to retrieve my
belongings. He was gorgeous, all tanned and defined. His shirt tightened over
his bulging back muscles and biceps and I began to swoon. Dammit, I was turning
into the cheerleading bimbos and I instantly hated myself for it. His hair was
cut into a military style buzz cut and it was the lightest shade of blonde. He
almost looked bald, until the sun would glisten off of the tiny spikes. My
heart literally skipped a beat. Who was this glorious creature in front of me?
I began to compose myself as he stood back up, handing me my belongings.

“Hi.” I squeaked and instantly
blushed at the fact that that was all I could come up with to say.

“So you do speak?” He laughed
and man was it a throaty manly laugh. I couldn’t help myself, I was laughing
along with him. “What’s your name?” His voice was just above a whisper and it
did things to me, deep down that I have only ever felt once.

“Bennett? Are you okay?” I heard
the all to familiar voice of Gray coming up behind me, and I tried to hide my
embarrassment from this beautiful man in front of me.

“Yeah Gray, I’m fine. I just
wasn’t watching where I was going and I ran into…. I’m sorry I didn’t catch
your name.” I pointed towards the man in front of me.

“That’s because I didn’t give
it.” He smiled and started walking down the hallway towards the office. “Don’t
worry, I have a feeling we will be seeing each other real soon Bennett.” He
winked at me and then he was gone. My name sounded arousing coming out of his
mouth, and I wanted to know this man more. I started questioning how I would
see him again, when Gray’s voice found its way into my thoughts.

“What the hell was that all
about?” He sounded mad.

“I have no idea. I came around the
corner and he ran right into me.” I shrugged and headed towards first period,
missing out on talking to Hannah all together. I felt Gray’s arm around my
shoulders, and I suddenly wished that we didn’t have every single class
together. All I wanted to do in this moment was run to Hannah and gush about
the perfect stranger that I just met, but Gray was in full-blown overprotective
big brother mode. With a roll of my eyes I continued walking to class.