Be Nobody (31 page)

When it comes to the deeper answer to the “Who da hell am I?” question, less is in fact more.

It is important to honor the personal self and its “developable” Buddha nature, and to continuously cultivate its transformation. But the less we grasp onto our particularity and individuality, the more we make ourselves available to our universal, eternal, blissful, and perfect “nobody self.”

In the Christian tradition, the relinquishing of the exclusive identification with the individual self is called
kenosis
(from the Greek word for emptiness)—the “self-emptying” of one's own ego in order to become entirely receptive to the divine. In a passage from the New Testament, we are admonished to renounce the ego's “selfish ambition” and “in humility” lose ourselves in service to others:

Be of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility regard others as better than yourselves. Let each of you look not to your own interests, but to the interests of others.
²⁹

The more we are able to let go of thinking about “me,” the more we are able to think of ourselves as “we.” Self-emptying allows for the recognition not only of our true self but also of our commonality, of the bonds we share with all other somebodies. When somebody is
emptied out and nobody remains, the space is created to refill and
be everybody
.

This passage from the Bible goes on to say that the self-emptying process also entails a kind of “mind meld” with Christ—not with the Jesus Christ Superstar version but rather with the one who truly voided himself of all conceit and pride:

Let the same mind be in you that was in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not regard equality with God as something to be exploited, but emptied himself, taking the form of a slave, being born in human likeness. And being found in human form, he humbled himself . . .
³⁰

The “somebody self” becomes more like nobody when it practices humility rather than pride, modesty rather than arrogance, connection rather than haughty (and unhappy) isolation. It is when we empty ourselves that we are filled with plentitude and realize the Great Commonality we share with all others.

The more we can put the “somebody self” aside, the more affinity we feel for all others and for life itself. We become more like Jesus—humbled by his humanness rather than prideful about his divine origins—and by doing so become more attuned to both the common humanity and universal divinity each of us shares with all others. As we are told in the Biblical passage cited above, it is through practicing “looking not to your own interests, but to the interests of others” that we train ourselves for increasingly melding our minds to that of the divine.

•  •  •

When we empty ourselves completely, we automatically slip into our “nobody self.” As we've seen, we are nobody when we are in
between being somebody. But even as a self-conscious somebody, we can practice taking on both the identitylessness and the sense of interrelationship with others that is entailed in
being nobody
. When a “somebody self” learns to be more of a nobody, they increasingly actualize their capacity to identify more with everybody.

As we have noted, selflessness and empathy lie at the very heart of what it means to create good karma rather than bad. The practice of karma yoga, you will remember, is action done without self-regard or personal reward—action done for its own sake, knowing that virtue is its own reward. If our intention is motivated by selflessness and altruism, our activities will have a beneficial result on our self-image and on our outlook on the world.

We've discussed several methods for improving our self-image, all of which revolve around the premise that it is
nobody that makes a better somebody possible
. When we drop into our true nature and in one way or another turn off the self-centered inner narration—through love and compassion for others, mindful unselfconsciousness in our actions, or virtuous action done for its own sake—we experience the power and joy of
being nobody
.

The self-emptying project can be thought of not only as a hollowing out but also as an infusion of our true selfless nature into our “somebody self” identity. The latter gets itself out of the way and, in thought and action, becomes more nobody-like.

There are relatively simple ways in which we can start practicing being more of a nobody as we live in our daily lives as a somebody. On our way to final liberation, we can increasingly become more like our spiritual heroes and religious archetypes: more Christ-like, more Buddha-like, more
nobody-like
.

Instead of reveling in and glorifying our individuality and uniqueness, we can practice living more as just a regular guy or gal, just an Ordinary Joe.

We've seen that the “nobody self” is nameless and unnamable. By becoming more
anonymous
—a word that derives from the Greek phrase “no name”—we mirror and imitate our true nature.

My birth name is “Brian Smith.” The “Brian” part is the name my parents gave me, but the surname is a total invention. I might just as well be called “Brian X” or “Brian Doe.”

Here's the story: My paternal grandfather (the professional wrestling fan) was left as an infant on the doorstep of some orphanage in late-nineteenth-century England. His parentage was unknown—there was no note or anything pinned on the swaddling clothes. And so the staff gave him the most generic last name possible for that time and place: Smith.

I know that there are some people who can trace their family lineage back to the
Mayflower
or whatever, but I personally am only a couple of generations removed from complete obscurity when it comes to my genetic origins. My bloodline disappears into namelessness and anonymity pretty quickly.

And truth be told, no matter how far back your family genealogy can be traced, eventually we all discover that we end up as . . . well, no one in particular. We all, if we look into the matter, are of indeterminate origin. Despite the different names that distinguish us, at bottom we are really all just generic human beings.

Practicing being more anonymous, and posing less as the amazing, special somebody we all think we are, is an acknowledgment of our basic commonality. It's not only our true nature, the “nobody self,” that we share with all others. Even as individual somebodies, we're all really “just folks,” and embracing our generic ordinariness leads to a closer affinity with our fellow human beings (themselves all “just folks” too).

Little acts done incognito teach us to be less and less identified with our sense of particularity, our ego, our “somebody self.” Acting as anonymous agents of good in the world, we train ourselves to be more of a hybrid, more of somebody who is practicing to be more nobody-like.

There are many, many ways in which we can think and act more anonymously in our lives. Here are just a few tips to get you started in your new career as Secret Agent 000:

 If you live in a city that still has them, plug someone else's depleted parking meter and save them a ticket! And don't stand around waiting for the owner to come back so you can be thanked.(Putting money into someone else's parking meter is, by the way, illegal in many municipalities, so, by doing this little act of civil disobedience, you can also get in touch with your inner Che Guevara.)

 Take a “first-person-pronoun-free day” where you avoid using the terms “I,” “me,” or “mine” for twenty-four hours. Trying to keep up this practice over an extended period of time will make you more aware of how often we think of (and talk about!) ourselves, and only ourselves.

 Give presents to people without them knowing it was you who was the donor. You might want to stick on one of those little tags, filling out the “To” part but leaving the “From” line blank.

 Do somebody else's job for them—a task at work that your office mate is responsible for, or a chore at home that your partner usually takes care of—and do it secretly and transparently.

 Slip some money into the purse or wallet of someone that you know is having financial challenges. This reverse pick-pocketing will require the same sort of cleverness and stealth that criminals employ. And you will experience the same thrill that the successful
thief enjoys, while simultaneously doing something nice for someone else!

 It used to be a tradition on May Day to place a basket of food, flowers, or presents on a neighbor's doorstep, ring the doorbell, and then run away. Becoming Secret Agent 000 could singlehandedly revive this tradition, and not just on May 1.