Because I Love You (16 page)

Holding the baby today triggered a severe case of mother lust. Leah wasn't getting younger and she was terrified she wouldn't be able to get pregnant when she and Tris were ready. They didn't want to wait a long time, and there was no denying she wanted children sooner rather than later. Then there was her career. She'd just gotten back on track and was going to make partner within the next year. Did she walk away from that?

Sure, she knew she didn't have to. They had the resources to have a live-in nanny, but was the high-pressure life of a securities attorney really what she wanted? Leah loved the law, but maybe she had to find another way to practice.

She'd never been faced with so many changes so fast and, as happy as she was, it was overwhelming. How did women do this? Manage everything, and stay true to their goals, professionally and personally? God, it was a lot to think about.

As if on cue, the poster child of working mothers—Harper—poked her head in Leah's room. “Damn, girl. You're hard to find. Wanted to escape the madness?”

“Yeah. I needed to think.”

“Well, you can't do that with all the chatter going on downstairs, that's for sure. So, let me see that ring again.”

Harper examined Leah's hand and smiled. “He's a keeper, that one. But I'm here mostly because I have a proposition for you from the partners.”

“What?”
Something from the partners?
“This sounds official.”

“It is. Look, I saw you holding the baby. You want to be pregnant like yesterday. I'm going to offer you a way to have both your career, and your children.”

“Do you have ESP or something? Holy shit.” These people at Reliance had some kind of woo woo going on.

“No, Leah. I
saw
you. And I know how you feel, juggling sucks. But I'm lucky. I can do both. I have a support system, and a job that respects my work and my motherhood.”

“So what's the proposition?”

“Corporate counsel. Our current attorney, James, is leaving once Tris takes Nate's place. We've known for a month and didn't quite know what to do. We were thinking about outsourcing the legal work, but we like having an attorney in-house, on the administrative team. You'd be perfect.”

“Why is James leaving?”

“He hates Tris. Said he won't work with him. The two have knocked heads over some things, internal stuff. Jason and Owen sided with Tris, and told James to resign. He's getting a nice package, but he'll be gone after the New Year.”

“Wow. I never imagined . . . thanks, Harper. I'll think about it.”

“You'll have a stellar salary—it's probably a raise—a title, office suite with a staff of two attorneys, a paralegal and three administrative assistants. The benefits are generous.” Dropping a folder on the bed next to her, Harper grinned. “Here's the offer. Call me in a few days and we can talk. I'm working from home for a couple of months. If you want more money,
we'll see what we can do. We want you, Leah, and it's not because you're related.”

“Whoa.”

Before she closed the bedroom door, Harper smiled. “Please consider it.”

“I will.” She most definitely would.

Leah hadn't been able to keep her mind on work since Harper had presented her with the opportunity of a lifetime a few days ago. The offer to work as Reliance's corporate counsel was more than generous and the work was varied and interesting. Even better, she'd be in control of her own department. She knew the company culture valued autonomy and independence, and that was something Leah was sorely missing where she was working now.

More and more, she was seeing that her professional life was lacking. She thought she was on the fast track, but she was seeing more and more that she was nothing but a minion. Everything was dangled like a carrot—staff, partnerships, bonuses, money. And like lemmings, the associates followed wherever the carrot led them. She liked the people, mostly, but it wasn't enough to keep her from breaking ties with her firm.

She just didn't know how.

It wasn't only about leaving her current job. She'd be blowing away every goal she'd set for herself. Was she ready to do that?

Normally, she'd bounce this off Tristan, but he was too close to the situation. She needed to make the decision without him, without her family. For the first time in her life, Leah was on her own.

It was scary shit.

And it was exactly what she needed.

Standing, she stretched, grabbed her coffee mug, and hoped the walk would do her some good. The break room was on the other side of the office complex, so she'd be able to shake out the cobwebs. Her phone buzzed in her pocket.

It was Nate. A text.
Shit hitting the fan. Need some advice.

What's the problem?

Tristan.
That was all he wrote.

Leah's heart jumped into her throat and she texted back.
I'll call later.

Standing in the break room, she looked out at the skyline of downtown Manhattan, which was now dominated by the Freedom Tower at One World Trade Center. It had been fourteen years since the towers fell. She was in high school when it happened and everything changed. She remembered the day. The school going on lockdown, the fighter jets flying patrols over Long Island. She remembered her mother's tears as she heard of more people from church, or school, who had been killed when the towers fell.

Maybe it was time for a change of scenery. Reliance's offices were built in a converted shipyard, on the North Shore. She'd have a water view right outside her office. That wasn't a bad thing.

“Leah!”

Tad.
Help me, Lord.

“Hi, Tad.” She'd expected only Tad's smarmy face when she turned, but he wasn't alone. Candace Hopkins with him. “Hello, Candace, how nice to see you again.”

“Lovely to see you, Leah. It was lovely meeting you the other night. I'm sorry we didn't get to talk more.”

“Yes. However, I'm glad you had a nice time. Networking events can be so deadly dull, it's nice when the venue takes your mind off of it.”

“Yes, and in your case, I hear congratulations are in order. You're engaged to Tristan.”

Leah nodded.
Why did she leave her office?

“I hope you have better luck getting him to the altar than I did. Well, I was the one who broke it off. Let me see your ring.”

What the fuck?

Leah held out her hand, more shell-shocked than anything.

“He does have excellent taste. He really loves Harry Winston. I still have the bracelet he bought me from there.” She took a few steps and travelled the room while she talked. Candace's hair was pulled back in a tight ponytail, and she was wearing a red power suit with mile high heels. She looked like a woman you didn't want to mess with. Leah actually started to hate her.

“I just didn't feel it was right to keep the ring since I broke things off. Although at that point, we didn't know if he was going to go to prison. I had such a taste for bad boys. I'm over it now.”

“Well, it's good when you can get past something like that.”
Good grief. What else could she say?

Get out of there, Leah. Get out before she says it!

But it wasn't to be.

“Look, Leah, we're friends. I feel like we're kind of bonded since, you know, we slept with the same guy, but I know you were hoping to find out why the IPO at your brother's company wasn't getting approved.”

“They're curious. What do you know?”

“It's Tris. He has a major black mark against him from the 2008 crisis. Lots of questions. He was arrested. The charges were dropped in London, but your government has been doing some digging. It's not going to help Reliance.”

“How interesting.” She had to keep her mind focused on this harpy who was playing fast and loose with information with the sole intention of pissing Leah off. “Well, thank you for that. I'll also thank you to keep speculation to yourself, as this kind of chatter could not only hurt Tristan, but the company, and you wouldn't want that on your conscience, would you?”

Tad was leaning into a table on the far side of the room, arms folded, listening. Candace was trying to do the whole sister-bonding thing but she was full of shit. “Look, Leah, you don't know me, so I'm going to give you some advice. Tristan is charming, but he gets bored easily. He's like a puppy and you're his newest thing. He likes to throw around diamonds and gifts, but don't let it go to your head. He jerked me around for a year and half.”

“Thank you, Candace. Tad. That was interesting. I hope you both have a good day.”

Leah didn't just leave the break room, she gathered her things and left the office, telling her secretary she could be reached on her cell if needed. She could not stay in that space. The Reliance offer was looking better and better, but what about what Candace said about Tristan? They were engaged? They were together a year and half? He said they'd just dated for a while.

She didn't even know about his run-ins with the legal system. This could be a critical problem for Reliance in general. They dealt with high stakes security systems—banks, brokerages. Hadn't Tris been fully vetted?

It was a nice day, so she walked home, still not knowing what was going on that had Nate calling and she didn't know what she should tell Tris. Good God, this was a mess. And it was a mess because he hadn't told the truth to anyone, but especially to her.

Lying was something she just couldn't handle.

Christmas decorations were popping up all over in anticipation of the holiday season. Thanksgiving was two days away. She thought this season was going to be magical, but it was turning into a nightmare.

Once she was in the elevator for her apartment, she called her brother.

“Nate, talk to me,” she said the second he answered.

“The SEC has informed us the application for the IPO is ‘irregular'. That was vague. “We have no idea what's happened. James isn't answering his phone or emails, and his junior counselors don't know anything because he never shared the files.”

“I've got some new information you need to look into,” Leah said. “But in the meantime, do you have access to any of his records? Like the application?”

“No.”

“Shit, Nate. You're the boss. BE THE BOSS! Get your IT people to hack those files.”

“Don't you think we're on that?” He took a breath. “Is your new info about Tris? Because I got an earful from a friend.”

“Yes.”

Letting herself in the apartment, she heard a noise and forgot that Tris was working from home today. Wonderful.

She spoke to her brother for a few more minutes, pretty much ignoring Tris, who had come out of his study, while she was on the phone. Nate was panicking, he said Owen was fit to be tied, and Jason was working on a way to break into the Reliance system that was protecting James' documents.

Then there was Tristan, and Leah was just too angry to talk to him.

Once she hung up, she looked at the man who made her heart race, the one she loved more than anything in the world. The man who was supposed to make her supremely happy.

“You're home early,” he said. “What's up?”

“I had to leave the office. And then Nate needed me.”

“Yeah, he told me James fouled things up brilliantly. Can you fix it?”

“I don't know.”

“Leah, I know I haven't said anything, but I really hope you're going to take the job with Reliance. You're so well suited to the position and you won't have to deal with the bullshit your firm is dishing out.”

“I haven't decided yet. I'll let you know.”

“Truly, this is a no-brainer. More money, better perks, and when we have kids, it will be so much better for your career. Stop overthinking and make the decision. It's the right thing to do.”

Keeping her wits was the only thing she had left. He was pushing and that was the last thing she needed. If Leah was going to get to the bottom of the document mess, she had to push the fear of losing him out of her mind, and deal with the facts. It was all she had right now. The facts. “You know, Tris, I don't need you telling me what to do. I'm a perfectly capable attorney and I can make my own decisions about my career. Especially since I can't trust you for a dime.”

“Trust me? What the hell are you talking about?”

“I had a nice conversation with Candace today. Okay,” she said, clarifying, “fine, it wasn't nice, but she was there and we talked.”

“Candace. I see. What did you talk about?”

“You mostly. How you and she were engaged. That little tidbit.”

“I, ah . . . not exactly. We talked about it. Once.”

“There was the whole being-investigated thing, and then the almost-getting-thrown-in-jail thing. Kind of serious, if you ask me.”

“I never went to prison, hell, I was never charged.”

“But you were investigated, and guess what? The Feds know about that, and guess why Reliance's application has been held up?

“Is that what she told you?”

“Is it true?”

He didn't answer and Leah's heart cracked.

“Tristan, is any of it true?”

“Leah, please listen to me. There's no reason to go off the rails.”

“Wait, what? Can you give me one good reason that you didn't tell me the truth? I don't care who you slept with in your past, Tristan, but if we don't have the truth between us moving forward we have nothing.”

“We were engaged. Yes. And I should have told you, but I was, I don't know. I didn't think it really mattered.”

“Of course it matters, if only because I asked you and you didn't tell me. You lied right to my face. Then what about the investigation? She said that's why she broke it off with you.”

“It is. They should have been investigating her, and she threw me under the bus. It was trumped up by her and two other principals in the firm. I was brought in for questioning, but they had no evidence and I was never charged. Could this be at the root of Reliance's issues? Maybe. But only if she made the SEC believe there was more of a story than there actually was. “

“You should have said something. Because I have a feeling that's exactly what she did, and I think she had help.”

“I made a mistake. This is why you aren't going to stay at that shit job you have and you're going to take Reliance's offer. We need you to navigate problems like this.”

Leah agreed in principle that Tristan was right about several things. She couldn't work with Tad, or Candace, anymore. She should take the offer. But she didn't like that he thought telling her what to do was okay. He didn't even see fit to tell her the truth.

“You need to back off, Tris. I'll make my own decisions.”

“Leah, it's the right thing. I know you're angry at me right now, but don't let that change anything. It's a bloody good offer and when we have a family, it makes the best sense.”

“A family? Tris, right now, I don't want to look at you. You lied to me.”

“I'm sorry.”

“You lied more than one time.”

“Leah . . . Don't—”

“I believed in you. In us.” Knowing she couldn't stay there, Leah moved toward the bedroom. “I can't believe in that right now. Are you hiding anything else?”

“No. Please don't do this.”

But there was nothing he could say. Lies had cost her everything once before. She couldn't put herself through that again.

*  *  *

Tristan walked into the office the Monday following Thanksgiving, knowing he had a lot of explaining to do, not only to his partners, but to the investigator from the SEC who had shown up mysteriously to ask him some questions about his involvement in a bad deal in England. He had nothing to tell them, except that he hadn't done anything wrong. But he didn't know if it even mattered any more.

Leah left.

She packed her bags and went to her parents' house. Leaving him to wonder if he should even bother to move forward with the new partnership. There was still time for him to pull out, and go home. He could play golf, take care of his own money, and travel. He didn't need to stay here. He couldn't if Leah wasn't part of his life.

He'd spent Thanksgiving with Jason Campbell and his family. He'd had a very nice time, but he wasn't where he
wanted to be.

The worst of it was Leah wouldn't even talk to him. After she'd left, he tried calling her, had left messages, all greeted with silence. If her sister thought she was needy, Amy didn't know Leah very well. The woman he loved may have had a big, soft heart, but she had a spine of steel and no one pushed her around.

Robyn was the first one to greet him and he knew immediately from the look on her face that everyone knew Leah had given him his ring back. She'd left all her jewelry, necklace and earrings as well, and it damn near broke his heart.

She'd asked him for one thing, and he'd failed her. He didn't know if he could fix it. Jewelry, gifts, and grand gestures might have been appealing to some women, but for Leah, the only thing that mattered was the truth.