Becoming Forever (Waking Forever Series) (22 page)

Chapter 11

“Miller, I swear to fucking god if you don’t keep these people back I will personally get you busted down to reading parking meters.” Lieutenant Edwards slid under the yellow crime scene as he reprimanded a tall, lanky officer who looked to be in his mid-twenties.

The motel courtyard had been corded off and the street in front of the motel, along with the alley behind it, had been blocked. Ash could hear the sound of car horns as exasperated drivers sat in gridlock.

Ash stood near the back of one of three crime scene vans on site. The dried blood on her pant
s had caused them to stiffen and cling to her legs.

“Lieutenant.”
She walked toward the man, who in the nearly ten years she had known him had never looked so tired. His face was red, and his eyes bloodshot. Ash knew better than to ask if he had been crying, knowing full well he wouldn’t respond honestly.

“Haines, what the hell are you still doing here? Higgins said the
y got your statement.”

“I wanted to wait for you.” Ash felt like she was moving through water.

“I’m here. Now go.” Edwards waved a uniformed officer toward the motel entrance. “Get over there and you tell them a press pass doesn’t mean access to an active crime scene.”

“Have you talked to Diane?” A persistent lump in the back of Ash’s throat continued to make it difficult for her to speak.

Edwards looked down. “I just came from seeing her. She asked about you, and I told her you would call her.”

Ash took a deep breath, and forced the tears back. “I’ll get cleaned up and go over.”

“What happened, Ash?” Edwards put his hand on her shoulder.

The simple gesture
of the Lieutenant using her first name, and she couldn’t recall him ever touching her, caused the tears to flow. “Cris got a call from the motel manager that some odd paraphernalia was found in a residence room that may have something to do with the Garrett case. Cris took six uniforms, and knowing the suspect was likely to leave, attempted to secure him in the room. I arrived after they had gone in.”

Ash forced air into her lungs, and wiped at her eyes with
her hand. “There was a gunshot. I moved in while backup was called. I got into the room and -” She looked toward room seven that was now teeming with CSI personnel.

“The manager never called. He had no idea what was happening. The gunshot was Riggs in the alley getting off a shot as the perp exited the bathroom window. Riggs is dead too.” Edwards removed his hand from Ash’s shoulder. “Go see Diane. I’ll call you later.”

“Have they taken -” The words caught in the back of her throat. “Have they taken Cris-”

Edwards shook his head. “Not yet. But they have practically every person from CSI and the medical examiner’s office here; so it won’t be long.”
The man rubbed his face. “Christ.”

He looked at Ash. “Take care of yourself, and we’ll talk soon.”

“I want the case, Lieutenant.” Ash spoke quickly. “There’s something here. The smell in that room was like my apartment the night I was attacked.”

Edwards looked at her, confused. “What are you saying?
This is connected to your break-in?”

Ash
nodded. She didn’t want to divulge everything she thought about her attack and the Garrett case. She didn’t want Edwards thinking she was crazy. “The break-in and the Garrett case.”

A woman dressed in a gray pant suit who Ash remembered as being part of the public relations team walked up to Edwards.
“Lieutenant, the captain is here, and asking for you.”

“Got it. One minute.” Edwards nodded. “Haines, I want this in a report tomorrow, and then I want you to take the week.”

“Lieutenant I-” Ash didn’t want to be outside the loop on this.

“Not a request
, Haines. Report and then I don’t want to see you until next Monday.” Edwards turned and followed the PR representative toward the front of the motel.

Left alone again, Ash leaned against the CSI van.
She scanned the scene. Officers and investigators moved quickly back and forth. The noise was a low hum in Ash’s ears.

“Detective.” A
thick male voice came from Ash’s right. She turned to see Richard Dorsey with his eyes fixed on her.

“Dorsey.” Ash nodded, not sure why the man was talking to her. “Do you need something from me?”

He grinned, flicking his tongue across his misaligned teeth. “Terrible thing here.”

“Yea
h.” Ash wasn’t in the mood to make nice with this brute.

Dorsey took a step toward Ash, and leaned down. “You’re lucky.”

Ash tried not to be obvious as she tilted her head away from the man’s terrible breath. Though his words seemed superficially comforting, Ash detected an undertone of malice. She didn’t want to be near this man any longer than necessary.

“Sure. Have a good one
, Dorsey.” She walked away from the man. Feeling drained, she wasn’t sure if her legs would continue to support her. She was looking around for a bench or chair when she saw Emma move through the crowd near the entrance to the motel, and deliberately walk toward Ash. Without hesitating, she wrapped her arms around Ash, and pulled her to her.

“I’
m so sorry.” Emma gently rubbed the back of Ash’s neck as she whispered her condolences into her ear.

Unable to speak, Ash felt the tears began to flow unchecked. She clung to Emma as her legs buckled. The doctor wrapped her arm around Ash’s waist
to support her, walking them both toward the rear exit of the motel. “Come on. My car is parked two blocks over.”

Through her grief, Ash was aware of how effortlessly Emma supported her. There were points as she guided her through the less congested rear exit of the motel, that Ash was certain Emma lifted her off the ground as her knees buckled. Before Ash knew it, Emma was opening the passenger door of her Nissan Leaf.

“Shit, Emma, I can’t get in your car like this.” Ash looked down at her blood stained suit.

Emma took her by the shoulders and turned her so her back was to the seat. “Don’t be stupid. Get in.” Not waiting for Ash’s response, Emma eased her down into the seat.

Ash felt the last of her restraint melt away, and along with it the last of her energy. Tears streamed down her face, and she was only vaguely aware of Emma getting in the car, and handing her several tissues. Time lurched and halted around Ash, as the lights of the city streaked by outside the car window. Cris was dead, along with five other officers, and there was a maniac loose in the city.

The car stopped, and Emma got out of the driver’s side. Ash watched as she walked around the front of the car, and opened the passenger door. Ash managed to pull herself out of the car, and looked up to see a large, two story gray brick house in front of her. “Is this your house?”

Emma shut the car door behind Ash. “It is. If you prefer your place, I can drive you over.” Emma hesitated. “I’m happy to stay with you, regardless.”

Ash managed a weak smile, and reached for the doctor’s hand.
She was too tired to maintain the pretense of indifference toward Emma. “Anywhere with you and a shower is fine.”

Emma
ran her hand lightly over Ash’s hair, before leading her up the windy front walk to a large oak door with an ornate blue and green stain glass pattern at the top. She punched in a code near the door’s handle, there was a faint clicking sound, and the door opened.

“Please come in.” She gestured toward a large tiled entryway, with vaulted ceilings. Ash walked through the door, and took her heels off, not sure what might be on them.

“Your home is beautiful.” Her friend’s scent permeated the house, and Ash tried not to be too obvious as she took deep breaths in through her nose. She looked around as Emma shut the door behind her. To her left was a wide staircase with carved wooden banisters on either side. Past the stairs, Ash could see an expansive hallway that led to the kitchen.

The house was tastefully decorated in
British Colonial style. Divided into different rooms, the house’s dining room, and living room ran along the right side. The formal living room, and what looked like an office with many bookcases, ran along the opposite side.

“Thank you. There’s a full bath downstairs so you can shower.” Emma put her hand on the small of Ash’s back as she guided her down the hall.

The bathroom was decorated in taupe and light mauves. The tile was a stark white that ran from the floor to the ceiling with a walk-in shower. Ash stood in the middle of the immaculate room, and felt her stomach tighten. The trauma of earlier and the vomiting had taken its toll, and she sat down heavily on a small wooden stool next to the shower stall. “I’m sorry. I’m exhausted.” Ash rubbed her face.

Emma knelt in front of her
. Her voice was low and reassuring. “It’s perfectly fine.” She slid her hands under the shoulders of Ash’s jacket, carefully sliding the garment off, and placing it on the floor next to her.

Ash cringed when she saw the large blood stain on the back of the jacket from where she had rolled into the motel room. Emma looked at Ash, and gently placed her hand on the woman’s cheek. “Will you let me help?”

There was no lust or seductive undertone in Emma’s question, just an expression of concern and a desire to comfort. In that moment, Ash felt completely safe with the beautiful woman in front of her. “Yes.” Her voice was barely above a whisper.

Emma
began unbuttoning Ash’s blouse, to reveal the thin Kevlar vest underneath. She took Ash’s hands, one at a time, and gently holding her arms up, unbuttoned the sleeves.

Bringing each of Ash’s
hands to her lips, Emma lightly brushed her cool, full lips across Ash’s palms. Ash closed her eyes and felt the muscles in her back and shoulders relax for the first time in hours.

Pulling the blouse off Ash’s shoulders, Emma carefully slipped the sleeves down, and placed the blouse next to the jacket. Ash was holding her breath, and the silence was broken by Emma pulling the
Velcro straps of the vest apart. She put the vest on the floor.

Ash sat in a black tank top and her blood stained slacks. Without a word, Emma stood, took Ash’s hands in her cold ones, and pulled the exhausted woman to her feet. She reached down and paused as she placed her hands on the top button of Ash’s pants.

The two women looked at each other. Emma’s blue eyes filled with tenderness as she unbuttoned and unzipped the soiled trousers. Bending down, she pulled the pants to the floor, and Ash stepped out of them.

Emma slid the pants to the side and still kneeling in front of Ash, wrapped her arms around the woman’s waist, and laid the side of her face against Ash’s stomach.

A quiet moan escaped Ash’s slightly parted lips. She ran her fingers through Emma’s hair, the texture reminding her of a fine silk scarf. Entwining her fingers through the blonde hair, Ash pulled the woman closer, finding great comfort in being near her.

Standing up, Emma lifted the hem of Ash’s tank top up and over the taller woman’s head. Now standing in a pair of dark blue panties and matching bra, Ash wasn’t sure what to do next. Emma sensing her
hesitation, reached around her and turned the shower on. Her shoulder brushed against Ash’s bare one, and the detective shivered.

Emma’s voice was low and intimate as she leaned into Ash.
“Are you cold?” Emma placed her hand on Ash’s bare waist.

The coolness of Emma’s hand against the heat of Ash’s skin caused another shiver to run down Ash’s spine and settle in her lower abdomen. “I’m okay.” She wanted Emma to hold her. In her entire life she couldn’t remember ever having that desire be so visceral.

As if reading Ash’s mind, Emma stepped closer, and wrapped her arms around Ash. The full length of her body leaned into Ash’s, and the breath Ash had felt like she was holding escaped.

Ash wanted to whisper to Emma that
yes, she could kiss her. To tell her she needed the nearness of her. She reached for Emma’s hand. The smooth coolness of her fingers as they entwined with Ash’s caused her to sigh.

Ash couldn’t look away from the beautiful woman in front of her
, the flawless, pale skin complimenting the angular planes of her jaw and cheek bones. The blue of Emma’s eyes seemed to swirl and brighten. Ash’s heart was beating furiously in her chest, and her stomach tensed as a rush of longing passed through her.

She reached down with trembling hands and unbuttoned the top button of Emma’s jeans. Stepping closer to Emma, Ash unzipped her pants and gently pushed them down and over the woman’s hips. Emma stepped out of the jeans, and stood in front of Ash in a fitted black t-shirt and black panties.

Ash tentatively slid her hands under the hem of Emma’s shirt. Her skin was smooth and cool to the touch. Ash closed her eyes as she lightly stroked the flat planes of Emma’s stomach. A soft sigh escaped the blonde’s lips when Ash ran her hands over the flare of Emma’s hip bones and around her hips.

The two women stood with stomachs and thighs touching.
Ash leaned in and gently kissed Emma’s neck, parting her lips slightly so the sweet taste of the woman filled her. Ash took Emma’s face in her hands, needing to touch as much of her as possible.

Emma cov
ered Ash’s hands with hers. Ash felt a rush of heat skitter through her chest, and she was surprised as tears filled her eyes.

With a feather
light touch, Emma wiped at an errant tear with the tips of her tapered fingers. She looked at Ash; longing mixed with trepidation swirled in her piercing blue eyes. A slight nod of Ash’s head, and she was filled with Emma’s scent and coolness as her lips pressed to Ash’s. A hot arc of electricity shot through her.

Emma moved the two of them back several feet, until Ash’s back was against
the shower door, warm from the hot water and steam. A quiet moan escaped Emma’s lips. Ash deepened the kiss, her hand brushing the side of Emma’s face and into her silky hair.

Emma leaned
back long enough to pull her shirt up and over her head, dropping it on the floor. She immediately returned to Ash’s lips. Her hands slowly moved around to Ash’s back, unhooking her bra. In return, Ash slid her hands from the small of Emma’s back, up to her shoulder blades, and then unhooked her black bra.

Both wom
en shrugged simultaneously so their bras dropped to the floor at their feet. Ash pulled Emma against her. A gasp filled the room as the feeling of Emma’s cool, firm breasts pressed against Ash’s.  Both women stood, arms wrapped around each other, as the room filled with steam.

Emma slid her hands down the small of Ash back, and under the blue silk of her panties. Bringing her hands around to Ash’s hips, Emma
gently tugged the undergarment, and then slipped the panties down to Ash’s feet.

Standing up, Emma took a step back as Ash discarded the panties. She stood completely naked, and the look of admiration, tenderness and love she saw in Emma’s eyes triggered a tight pulsing heat in the pit of her stomach.

“You’re beautiful.” Emma’s voice was deeper than usual. The woman slowly pulled her own panties down over her hips, and let them drop to the floor.

Ash struggled to comprehend the perfection in front of her. Emma had flawless, symmetrical planes. Her breasts, round and firm, sat above her rib cage that led to a waist that narrowed at just the right point, and flared to perfectly proportional hips, leading to long, muscular legs.

Emma swallowed
. Her voice was so quiet it was nearly drowned out by the sound of the shower. “Ash, touch me. Please.”

Ash took the two steps to bring her to within an inch of Emma. Her hand languidly moved over the slope of Emma’s collar bone, down the shallow valley between her breasts, pausing briefly to rest on the firm
, flat plane of her stomach, sliding around her waist, and coming to rest on the small of her back as Ash pressed their bodies together. Ash found Emma’s lips and lightly kissed them.

Without breaking the kiss, Emma and Ash backed toward the shower. Reaching around Ash, Emma opened the glass door, and the two women stepped into the steam filled stall.

Stepping under the spray of hot water, Ash leaned back and wet her hair. When she opened her eyes, Emma stood directly in front of her with pink tinted shampoo in her palm.

After the tragedies of the da
y, the intimacy of this gesture, the fact Emma simply understood what Ash needed brought her name to Ash’s lips as her fingers began massaging the shampoo into Ash’s hair. Ash turned slowly, her back to Emma, as the woman worked the rose scented liquid through the thick tendrils of Ash’s dark hair.

Emma ran her soapy hands down Ash’s back and then reached around her to rinse her hands under the shower spray. Ash turned, and faced Emma. She tilted her head back, and began rinsing the shampoo
from her hair. Opening her eyes, she saw Emma lathering the bar of honey scented soap in a white washcloth. Stepping out from under the spray, Ash ran her hands through her hair, removing the excess water.

The
softness of the warm cloth being gently rubbed back and forth along Ash’s bare collar bones elicited a quiet sigh from her lips. She felt her feelings for Emma stretch and expand, filling her chest with a nearly unbearable boundlessness. Ash knew it would never shrink back to its former dimensions.

Ash took the woman’s face in her hands, amazed
her skin remained so cool to the touch in spite of the heat of the shower. Bringing her lips to Emma’s, she pushed gently with the tip of the tongue and smiled as the blonde’s lips parted, allowing her entry.

Moving the wash
cloth down the length of Ash’s back, Emma paused when she reached the curve of Ash’s lower backside, and applied additional pressure as she pulled the woman closer to her. Stepping back from Ash, Emma knelt in front of her on one knee, and with slow circles washed Ash’s left, then right leg. Emma stood, and rung the wash cloth out, laying it on the narrow shelf to her left. Placing her hands on Ash’s hips, she gently moved the woman back, and under the shower spray.

Leaning in, Emma ran her tongue along the front of Ash’s neck. “I’m going to get a robe for you. Are you okay for a minute?” She spoke against Ash’s neck.

Ash felt the room spinning as she clung to Emma.
We were together. I forget the rest.
The Whitman quote popped into her head, and it brought a smile to her lips.

Looking up, Emma smiled
at Ash. “What?”

Ash shook her head. “I’m very good. Go get the robe.”

Emma kissed her quickly on the lips, opened the shower door and reached for the taupe colored towel to the right of the shower. Stepping out of the shower, she quietly shut the frosted glass door behind her, and wrapped the towel around herself.

Ash watched as the blurry figure left the room. Sh
e turned into the shower spray and quickly finished rinsing the soap off her body. She heard the bathroom door open as she shut the water off. Pushing on the door, Emma stood in front of her in a white bath robe, her hair pulled back in a loose pony tail, and a towel in her hand. “Here you are.”

Ash took the towel, and began drying herself off.
Emma laid a navy blue bath robe across the wooden stool next to the shower. Looking at her, Ash was waiting for her independent streak to kick-in, or her self-reliance to raise its hand and shout at her to stop being so dependent.

Nothing about this time with Emma felt wrong. It was action, a series of movements to demonstrate a devotion to the comforting and consoling of another human being. Ash couldn’t find shame or guilt in it, only something incredibly strong and yet amazingly gentle.

Emma stood near the door as Ash finished drying. “There’s a hair dryer, and brushes under the sink if you’d like. Otherwise, I was going to make you some tea.” Emma frowned. “Sorry, no coffee.”

Ash slipped into the soft thick cotton of the bathrobe.
“Not a fan. I remember.”

“I can get you some.” Emma walked to Ash and took her hand. “Whatever you need.”

Ash smiled, and taking the tie of Emma’s robe in her hand, she pulled the woman toward her. “You and tea will do just fine.”

A li
ght kiss on Ash’s cheek and Emma left the bathroom. Alone, Ash retrieved the hair dryer and brushes from under the sink. Looking at herself in the mirror while brushing her hair out, Ash still felt the weight of her day thickening the air around her.

The death of a
friend and the escape of his killer both saddened and angered Ash. Tomorrow she would go see Diane, offer her condolences, and commit to bringing Cris’ killer to justice.

Her hair
adequately dry, Ash put the brush and dryer back, and stepped out of the bathroom. She looked to the right, where she thought the hall would lead her to the kitchen. “Emma?”

“Take a right, and down the hall.” The woman’s muffled voice sounded from the back of the house. Ash wound her way down a hall, past
a narrow back stairway, and then into a large kitchen. The dark walnut finish on the hardwood floor complemented the cherry finished wood cabinets. Gray granite counter tops ran throughout the kitchen, including the large center island and recessed nook that had several bottles of Glenlivet, along with a bottle of Tanqueray Ten, lined up neatly.

Emma stood next to the
built in stove top at the center island. Her hand was resting on top of a stainless steel kettle. “Is Earl Grey okay? It’s as close to coffee as I can get.” She smiled just as the kettle began to whistle.

“
Perfect, and with a bit of sugar if you have any.” Ash sat on a tall bar stool across from Emma.

“I can swing that.” She lifted the kettle up, and turned the gas burner off. “I’m afraid I don’t have much in the way of food. I haven’t been eating in much lately, and the basics are nonexistent.” She poured the steaming water into a large mug.

“The tea is fine.” The truth was she was starving. She skipped lunch because of the soccer game, and the events later didn’t do much to encourage an appetite.

Handing her the mug of tea, and a stainless steel sugar container, Emma looked at Ash closely. As if on cue,
her stomach let out a loud growl. Emma laughed as Ash blushed and grabbed at her misbehaving midsection. “Why don’t we order some pizza?” Emma suggested.

Ash nodded. “That might be a good idea.”

Emma walked around the island, to her purse that was sitting on the stool next to Ash. Pulling her phone out, she punched in a number. “I wouldn’t want that racket keeping me up all night.”

Before Ash could respond to the implication she and Emma would be sleeping in the same bed, she heard Katy Perry’s
Roar
begin playing behind her.