Before Him Comes Me (33 page)

            I
discovered the counseling sessions with Dr. R. weren
’
t the only thing that
healed me during my stay there. There was no denying it. It was the dancing as
well. 

            I
was ready. It was time. Time to put my big girl panties on and go home. I no
longer wanted to sit around and feel sorry for myself.
  I wanted to
take that feeling back home with me. I wanted to dance. Crazy as it seemed, I
wanted to dance.

            So
when I returned I started looking for a place to train. A place where I could
recapture that time in Cart
age
ñ
a. I found a great studio in the Orlando area
that taught all styles of traditional as well as the new Latin dances. After
the first few lessons I felt like I was born again into the thing I was meant
to be from the very beginning. After that, I never looked back.

            Even
though my life today is so full, there is always
that feeling that something lacking
and tugging at my heart.  But not today. Today I have no time for what is
lacking, only for what needs to be done: planning this season of dance
competitions and workshops, training with my partner, costume fittings,
rehearsals, and let us not forget countless spray tans.  I plan on being
on the road nonstop for the next six months.

            Staying
busy keeps my mind from wandering. Dance is what saved me from those dark days
in the beginning, when I wasn't sure where I'd be, and what my life would
become without my husband, my soul mate. Dance has filled the holes in my life
with such joy and accomplishment, and most of all, excitement. It
was the way for me
to heal from my loss, and keep my mind and body busy. I had plenty of funds to
buy me the best training available in the Central Florida area. I quickly
learned that Latin dance was not easy because I had the top trainers in the
area; it was easy because I was good.  No, I was very good, and I excelled
quickly. The first time I was invited to dance competitively, I laughed. Then I
thought, "What do I have to lose?"  I took first place in that
competition, and I was hooked.  Addicted, from then on I never looked
back.

           
In this world at this
level competing was not cheap, but I had the money,  that enabled me to buy the
best partners as well. Early on in my career, I made some really bad partner
choices. It seemed whoever my partner was at the time, we became romantically
involved. What I should really say is that  we were sexually involved. I loved
none of these men. Becoming top in the Latin dance world became my obsession. I
had no time for love. 

           
I met my current
dance partner Mateo Chavez as the result of being romantically involved with my
then-partner, whose name, not surprisingly, escapes me. We were competing for
the first time in the World Latin Dance Championships, and it was the first
round of preliminaries. On the night before competition was to begin, I caught
him in bed with another woman in our hotel room.  There was so much tension
and hatred between us on the dance floor, we did not make it past the
preliminaries.  After we lost, I decided to stay and enjoy the rest of the
competition. When the final night of competing ended, I joined some of the
other dancers to celebrate their win at the hotel bar.  Among the winners
was Mateo Chavez. It was there he approached me, handing me a business card. As
he pressed the card into my hand, he confidently said to me, "When you
want to become the next World Latin Dance Champion, call me."  Then
he simply walked away.  

           
Hell, when the
reigning champion offers you an open invitation like Mateo did, you call.
Because that is exactly what I wanted. The first thing Mateo told me was
that I needed to move to New York City if I wanted to train with him and become
his new partner. He said that I had outgrown the talent and training that
Central Florida had to offer, and I needed to be in NYC if I wanted to become a
champion.  I certainly had the money, and no longer had any emotional ties
to Florida, so I packed up and said goodbye to my friends and the place I had
spent my entire married life. 

           
Like I said, I learned early on being
involved with my partner did not work for me. Mateo is  this incredibly
handsome man.  But with Mateo I have no worries. He has no interest in
what I have to offer, he plays for the other team. I have used this to my
advantage, training and dancing without any distractions. Our style of dancing
is so intimate, so with a partner you want to make sure that sexual energy shows.
Mateo and I push those limits. We give the audience the illusion of what they
want to see but our personal feelings never come in to play. It works for
us. 

           
Beside the good
looks, Mateo has the body of a Greek Adonis. Women adore him.  I tell him
all the time he doesn't know what he is missing out on. But he likes to remind
me, he likes dick. He is so strikingly handsome both men and women alike stare
at him. Mateo is what I call a head turner. You know what I mean, his drop dead
gorgeous looks constantly turn heads. I have seen some women give themselves
whiplash staring at him.  Ashley, my assistant, thinks he looks like Ricky
Martin and I have to laugh because women have stopped Mateo in airports asking
him this.

         
I think I’m not so bad in the looks department
myself.  You can't compete at the level I do and not have a dancer’s body. I'm
not only known for the heels I wear dancing but also for my legs.
They are flawless
because of the time I spend dancing and in the gym.  Now Mateo has the
Latino good looks but you wouldn't mistake me for a Latin girl. Trust me, I
would love to have Jennifer Lopez's looks but I'll have to settle for more of a
Jennifer Aniston, All-american girl 
next door look.
 But I do have a
bit of a JLo ass on me. Yep, I got some junk in my trunk. 

           
It's hard for me to
say I'm attractive, after all I am a woman with my own insecurities, but Mateo
reminds that I am the hottest female on the circuit. Thanks to him I have
learned to embrace my looks and use them to our advantage. Not only does the
audience love us but the judges do as well. So Mateo and I aren't just the
couple to beat,  we are the hottest looking ticket on the
Professional Latin Dance Circuit. Together, we turn heads!

           
My move to New York
City was a major culture shock.  Living in Central Florida was so laid
back and quiet compared to New York City which is the polar opposite. People in
Florida are in no hurry and I had to learn that was not the case in the Big
Apple. First thing I did was sell my car. No one owns here. Thankfully Mateo
was a big help during those first few months. He taught me everything about
NYC. How to hail a cab, ride the subway, where to eat and where to shop. OK, I
can hail a cab like a real New Yorker but to this day I avoid the subway. Most
importantly he taught me how to protect myself and be safe living in this city.
Some days I so miss the Florida weather and the laid back lifestyle but I knew
if I wanted to be a champion Latin dancer I had to give NYC a real chance.
 I threw myself into the city life and I adjusted surprisingly very
quickly. I was eager to learn everything. I wanted my moment at the top. I
wanted that title. It was my drug and I craved it. 

           
I spent most of my
time dancing and training with Mateo in a studio that I now own. The original
owner was a wonderful elderly gentleman named Archie Reynolds. He had spent his
whole life devoted to ballroom dancing. He loved us both, myself and Mateo, and
he said he knew that one day we would be World Champions. I just wish Archie
would have lived a few more years, and had the opportunity to see his vision of
our success come to fruition.  Before his death he had to go into a
nursing facility and offered to sell me the studio and attached loft apartment.
The crazy thing is that he sold me the studio and loft for $50,000.00. He told
me he knew the studio was going to someone that would continue his dream, and
he was right. The loft had to be gutted and completely remodeled, and that
turned out to be costly. I had invested my settlement money, and was doing very
well. My accountant had long been encouraging me to invest my money and was
very happy that I was buying this place.

           
I have always been
careful with my money, even before I was awarded the settlement. I am very
modest about my wealth, especially how I attained it. I never wanted anyone to
think that I bought myself a World Latin Dance Champion title. Even those
closest to me don't know how financially secure I really am. The money thing is
an ongoing issue for me. It
’
s been so hard to accept how I got it. At
times I even feel guilty about it.  Always remembering that I would trade
it all just to have my Blake back. I get insulted when people try to use it as
a way to sway me. It
’
s
something I have been really working on but it
’
s hard to forget when
you lost everything you loved. 

            The
annoying ringing of my cell phone brings me back to my senses, and stops my
mind from drifting to
my
past once again. I immediately recognize the assigned ringtone of my manager,
Ken Ortega.  Whenever Ken calls, I hear Donna Summer singing “She Works
Hard for the Money.”  I am sure he is calling to add something to my
already overloaded schedule. Before I can even say hello, Ken starts yapping,
even though I cannot understand a word he is saying. I can feel the excitement
in the tone of his voice. Before he finishes rambling his unrecognizable
sentences, I stop him.

            "Slow
down Ken.
” 
I demand.  It was still early in the morning, and I wasn
’
t fully awake. 
“Calm the fuck down and repeat to me slowly what you just said.” 

            Ken
took an audibly deep breath and said, "You need to cancel everything you
have planned for next week, and be in Los Angeles by Monday to shoot a music
video.
”

            A
music video?
 
Is he for real?    

            “
Ken, did you say a
music video?” I have to be sure I heard him right.  

            “
Yes, Victoria, a
music video," he says in a matter-of-fact tone.

            "By
Monday? It's Friday already. Talk about last minute Ken," I scold.

            "I
know it is last minute Victoria, but it is a great opportunity for you. They
are willing to pay you very well for this last minute trip," Ken says in
an almost begging tone.
 

            "Ken
I don't have the time to choreograph a music video right now," I tell him.
  I am not
saying that I don't choreograph dances, and I have nothing against music
videos.  But I am leaving in a week to travel the workshop circuit for two
months. Then when I return we start practice for the coming competition
season.  I just really don't have time. Also, to be perfectly honest,
dealing with artists from the music world is sometimes not always fun. They
have huge egos. 

            "Actually,
they want you to dance in
the video, Victoria with Sonny.  Sonny de la
Cruz," he tells me, as if I am supposed to know exactly who this artist
is. “The
Sonny
de la Cruz.
”

            Ken
has to repeat his name and then proceeds to recites what sounds like a five
minute resume of this man's career. Seems he is the one of biggest stars in
Latin music with an almost cult like following. His music is poetic, dark and
moving, a bit underground. All of this according to Ken, who still seems a bit
too excited for some reason. Ken finishes by telling me he has always stayed
true to his Latin roots, and has never been considered a sellout. After
processing Ken's lengthy description of this guy
’
s career I have a
question for him.

            "Ken,
why does he want ME to be in his music video?"

            Ken
explains the Latin Superstar did not request me but his wife
did, who is also his
manager. She says I am the best in Latin dance world, and I am perfect for the
dance sequence of the video. They want me because I am the real deal. I am
laughing in my head thinking, "I bet they think I am Latin." 
His wife actually found me on YouTube. 

            Yes,
YouTube. I am thankful for it. Mateo and I have become very popular all over
the world because of it. Some of our dance competition videos have several
million hits on YouTube. We also have Twitter and Facebook pages with thousands
of followers. Social networking has catapulted both of us to a celebrity-like
status.
 

            "I
really don't have the time for a music video that I will waste God knows how
many days shooting
.
Then I am sure most of my hard work will be left on the cutting room floor
after they edit it.  We both know it
’
s not about the money, so you can lose that
angle." I tell Ken.