Being Elizabeth (43 page)

Harvey Edwards, President of the International Association of Business Executives, stood on the stage at one end of the ballroom. ‘And so,' he said, ‘we come to the presentation of our Award for Business Excellence. This year we are honouring a very special woman, a unique woman in the world of business … a woman whom we all recognize for her enormous
ability, her brilliance, her vision and her leadership. One of the few women to shatter the glass ceiling. Ladies and gentlemen, it is my great honour to present to you Miss Elizabeth Deravenel Turner, managing director of the oldest conglomerate in the world … Deravenels.'

The applause was thunderous.

Elizabeth's heart thudded as she walked up to the stage, and she shivered as she mounted the steps. She had written her speech that morning and decided not to bring it at the last minute, knowing it would be much more personal and meaningful if she spoke extemporaneously.

Harvey Edwards greeted her warmly, kissed her cheek, and presented her with the award. This was an elegant crystal obelisk, engraved with her name and inscription.

Elizabeth thanked him, placed the obelisk on the podium and brought the microphone closer. Once she had thanked the association for honouring her and everyone for coming, she began her speech.

At first she talked about her father, the late Harry Turner, who had been one of the world's great magnates; she touched on her grandfather, Henry Turner, who had held the company steady in bad times, and said loving words about her great-grandfather, Edward Deravenel, the man who had done so much to make Deravenels one of the greatest companies in the early part of the twentieth century. And then she moved on, spoke with fervour about the importance of women in business, and all of the contributions they had made and were making in the world of business in the new millennium.

She was eloquent, articulate, and funny, frequently making the audience roar with laughter, which pleased her. And then all of a sudden she had said all she wanted and needed to say … except for thanking certain colleagues at Deravenels, mentioned some of them by name.

And finally, pausing for a moment, she began in a very clear
and vibrant voice, ‘And now I must thank Robert Dunley, my partner in life as well as in business.' Seeking him out, her eyes focused on him steadily. ‘Robin, without you by my side I would not have achieved anything. You are the one who showed me the way … Showed me how to be Elizabeth Deravenel Turner. And I thank you for that from the bottom of my heart.'

She knew there was something wrong the moment they got home. He walked into the living room and stood by the fireplace, his face rigid, and she realized he was full of tension, taut, pent-up. And perhaps angry? But why?

‘What's wrong, Robin?' she asked swiftly, following him into the room.

He did not answer at first. He simply stared at her, frowning. At last he said, ‘Why did you call me your partner? Why not your fiancé, since that is what I am as of tonight?'

‘I didn't think … I'd written those words this morning … they'd stayed in my mind. I'm sorry, really I am.'

‘And there's something else, Elizabeth, something I don't understand. You changed the ring. What I mean is that you took it off your left hand and put it on your right hand. Does that mean we are no longer engaged? Brief, wasn't it, my magic moment?'

‘Robin, please, listen to me! I was nervous about the evening, and giving the speech. I put the ring on my right hand because I didn't want to explain anything to anyone. Not tonight when I was facing that huge audience. I just wanted to get through the evening.'

‘I suppose that's why you called me your partner, so you didn't have to …
explain me away!
'

He sounded angry, but also hurt.

She took a step forward, wanting to hold him, touch him,
make him feel better. She was also slightly perplexed. She had never seen him behave like this.

‘Don't come any closer,' he warned in a tight voice, glaring.

‘Robin, I'm so very sorry if I've hurt you, demeaned you in any way. You must believe me. I love you. I would never do anything –'

‘Oh, to hell with it! And to hell with you!' he cried, his voice rising. ‘I don't know why I put up with this, I really don't.' His voice broke, and she saw sudden tears glistening on his dark lashes. ‘I'm leaving. For good.'

Before she could say a word, he had rushed across the room and gone out through the front door.

Elizabeth stood staring at the door, shaking her head, for a moment not understanding. He had said he was leaving.
For
good
. Oh, my God, he had left her!

Within seconds she was out of the flat and in the lift, going down to the street level. Wrenching open the front door into the street, she half-ran, half-stumbled down the outside steps. She could see him in the distance, hailing a cab.

‘Robin! Robin!' she shouted and began to run faster. He paid no attention to her, just kept waving his arm, trying to flag down a taxi.

‘Robin! Robin! Wait for me, please. Wait for me. Robin Dunley, stop! Don't go.' She hitched up her dress with both hands and ran after him, screaming his name at the top of her voice. Oh, God,
no
, she thought, when she saw a taxi coming to a standstill. His hand was on the door. He was going to leave.

‘Robin, wait! Wait for me.
Please!
'

He finally turned around, one foot on the taxi's step.

‘I wouldn't say no to that, Guv,' the cabbie said, leaning out of his window. ‘Go on, go to her. I bet you won't regret it, Guv.'

Robert stepped back, banged the door and turned around, watched as Elizabeth came rushing towards him, her hair flying out behind her. As she fell against him he caught hold of her
tightly. She was out of breath, panting hard, tears streaming down her face. So frantic and distressed was she, he realized she wasn't even able to speak.

Holding her upright with one arm, he pulled out the silk handkerchief in the top pocket of his jacket and wiped the tears from her cheeks.

‘You'll have to take me home,' she mumbled against his chest. ‘I've no door key.'

‘I wouldn't leave you out in the street like this,' he answered curtly. ‘I'll get you into the flat, and then I'm leaving.'

Once they were back in the living room, Elizabeth leaned against the front door, said in a raspy voice, ‘You can leave if you wish. I don't suppose I can stop you. Just tell me what I've done.'

A deep sigh rippled through him and he closed his eyes for a moment, then went and leaned against the mantlepiece. ‘I told you a few minutes ago.'

‘I'm so sorry, so very sorry,' she began and tears filled her eyes again. ‘Can't you understand my anxiety about this award thing, and forgive me, or excuse me …?' She left her sentence unfinished.

‘I'm just so bloody tired,' he said, and so softly she hardly heard him. ‘I've had it up to here.
And I'm fed up
. We've been together for almost ten years, living together as man and wife, and now I think we should make it legal. And what about a child? You really ought to have an heir, you know. However, I need to say this … I want you to marry me, Elizabeth.'

‘You know … you know how reluctant …'

‘Oh, yes, I know all about that … your reluctance. What it boils down to is that you can't marry me because you're married to Deravenels. You love your business more than you love me,' he yelled accusingly.

‘That's not true!' she cried, shouting back at him. ‘I do love
you
. I always have. You're the only man I've ever had, the only man I've ever wanted.'

‘I've heard all this before. And now I have to go.' He began to walk towards the foyer.

She rushed after him, grabbed his arm, pulled him around so that he was facing her. ‘I love you so much … please give me another chance … I'll try to overcome it … that fear I have of marriage. Just help me … let's be engaged for a bit, and I'll try very hard –'

‘You just can't forget your father, and the way he treated your mother and all his other wives. He's ruined you for marriage, I know that only too well, Elizabeth.'

She began to weep, clung to him and finally he brought her into his arms, held her close, stroking her hair.

After a moment she took a step backward, pulled the silk handkerchief out of his top pocket and dried her eyes. Swallowing, she said, ‘I've never loved anyone else the way I love you. We've been together for twenty-seven years actually, since we were little. Most people don't have marriages that last so long.'

Robert stared at her, saw the tangled mess of her hair, the tear-stained face, the smudged eye make-up, and he understood it all then. He could never abandon her; they were twin souls, as one.

Reaching out for her, he brought her closer to him, held her by the shoulders, looking deeply into those dark, mysterious eyes. ‘I cannot leave you. How could I? I'm your creature, just as you are mine. I belong to you, and you belong to me, and I can never love another woman …'

‘And I will never love another man,' she whispered. ‘Please don't leave me, Robin. I'll die without you.'

When he was silent, she begged, ‘Please don't leave me.'

Touching her cheek gently, he nodded. ‘I promise you I will always be by your side … until the day I die.'

And he was.