Beneath a Blood Moon (35 page)

Desmond sighed, shook his head, and hung up. “Wendy and I are more than happy to have you join us, Sara. You’d be close to your mate all the time since my territory is actually within his territory. You’d have a safe place to go if his pack frightens you. Wendy may not be as submissive as Chrissy, but you’ll find she’s far, far better at her job. If your pack wasn’t so damned jealous, Chrissy probably would have been your first friend.”

Unable to believe I could be friends with any of them, I shook my head.

“It’s true. Submissive wolves are compelled to try to make things better for their pack. It wouldn’t surprise me if she’s taking this the hardest, because preventing pack members from going off the deep end is her job, and she’s failed at it rather spectacularly. Sure, you upset your mate enough to coerce him into breaking you free of the pack bonds, but the bonds tying Fenerec together aren’t so easily forgotten. It hurts us when one of our pack dies, but to be the cause of it? It goes against what pack means. Yes, they were jealous, yes, they were stupid, but I don’t believe for an instant they wanted you dead.”

Stroking his hand through my fur, Desmond sighed before waggling his fingers in front of my nose. Dark fur clung to his skin. “I’m going to make you an offer that will get me in a great deal of trouble with the Shadow Pope, but I’m going to do it anyway. Let me pull you into my little pack of two. We’ll show you how packs are supposed to work, teach you the ropes a bit, and once you’re settled, Seattle can petition to have you. It’ll drive your mate wild having to beg me for permission. More importantly, because he can’t subjugate any wolf from me I don’t want him to take, he’ll have to have his pack sorted out properly. If he can get them all working together to steal you from me, they can. Given a week, they’ll understand how destructive their choice was to Sanders.”

I whined. Dying was supposed to free my mate, not make him suffer.

“I’m not stupid enough to think there’s a magic bandage for what happened tonight, either. You’ll remember, your mate will remember, and Seattle’s pack will remember. It’s entirely possible you’ll be fighting this for a long time. I’m not going to make you a bunch of pretty, false promises. You’ll get through tonight, and it’ll be a victory. Each day you make it through, it’ll be a victory. Honestly, you probably won’t view it as one, but we will. One day, maybe a month from now, maybe in two or three years, you’ll wake up and go through the motions of telling yourself everything’ll be okay. But you’ll actually believe it, it’ll surprise you, and you’ll find you can move on.”

Turning my ears back, I listened, had my doubts, and remained quiet.

“All I want from you is one thing, Sara. If you feel like you did tonight, and you can’t handle it, find someone to talk to. If you can’t, just run away. Live to fight another day. Of course, your mate will chase you; he’ll be furious, worried, and terrified of losing you. He’ll eventually catch you, he’ll scold you fiercely for scaring him, and he’ll be so grateful you’re still alive to scold he’ll probably cry, which will be awkward for all parties involved. Just ask Wendy; she’ll confirm it. She’ll probably delight in embarrassing me.”

I sighed.

“If half of what you and Dustin said is true, you have damned good reason to be afraid, and even fewer reasons to trust me. Give me and Wendy a chance. If you don’t feel safe and wanted, you can leave our little pack and be a lone wolf, to hell with what anyone else says. I’ll introduce you to Richard, and if you don’t like what he has to offer with his pack, that’s fine as well. But, if you’re with me, your mate won’t worry as much, and he’ll feel he’s been given a chance to prove himself and his pack to you. They have a lot to prove, and don’t think for a single minute you’re not worth the effort, because you are.”

It was too much work to deny what he wanted, so I sighed again and forced myself to nod.

“It’ll make your wolf happy, too. You’ll see. I’m going to take you back to Dustin, we’re going to get you warm and dry, and then I’m going to have him give you a nudge back to human shape. I’ll bring you into my pack, and you’ll let me take care of you, okay?”

Packs frightened me, but my wolf was so hopeful it hurt. I submitted, wondering if I was making yet another catastrophic mistake.

Desmond wrapped me in his jacket and held me close. The transformation from wolf to human went by in a pained blur, and afterwards, I shook so much I couldn’t hold anything, let alone fight him. When he brought me into his pack, instead of the shock of so many pressing down on me, all I sensed was a faint warmth.

My wolf was puzzled and intrigued by the sensation. With her attention so absorbed by the new feeling, I was left to deal with the consequences of what I had done.

All I wanted to do was crawl into a corner somewhere and sob.

“Easy, Sara. No one’s going to hurt you, not with me on guard,” Desmond murmured in my ear, rubbing my back. “Holly, can you bring your rental around, please? Let’s get her out of the cold.”

“Sure. It’ll take a few minutes. I’ll have to figure out how to get it nearby and out of sight of the Normals.”

“Dustin, how’s her temperature?”

The witch took hold of my hand, massaging my wrist with his thumbs. “Low, but not dangerous. Mild hypothermia. She’s dehydrated, but she’ll do. Are you sure separating her from Stud Muffin for more than a few minutes is a good idea?”

“He has two submissive Fenerec with him. One is probably about as fragile as Sara is right now. While I’d love to watch Chrissy suffer a bit for her part in this, I think there’s been enough damage done. Sanders needs to get his pack in line. Unless they’re physically separated, he can’t focus on his pack, not with her like this. Wendy will take care of him.”

“So long as we keep his mate stable,” the witch pointed out.

“I’m okay,” I mumbled.

“You’re cold, you’re in shock, and judging from your scent, you’re trying really hard not to cry,” Desmond replied. “That hardly counts as okay. You don’t have to keep pretending, Sara. I’m not going to tell, and despite the way he keeps running his mouth, Dustin doesn’t mean any harm either.”

“Oh, I mean harm, just not to
her
,” the witch grumbled.

“I think Sanders has suffered enough, and if that doesn’t get his pack rethinking things, well, maybe I’ll just steal their Alpha. That’d serve them right.”

“I’m pretty sure the uppers would not like it if you yanked Seattle’s Alpha out of his pack, Mr. Desmond.”

“I’d consider giving him back if they groveled sufficiently. I could give him to Sara as a present.”

Releasing my wrist, Dustin rose to his feet. “Please disregard this nonsense coming out of his mouth.”

“It’s not nonsense. It’s strategic thinking. Sanders is too good of an Alpha to waste on a bunch of ungrateful mongrels.”

The rumble of a car’s engine drew Desmond’s attention, and with a grunt, he got to his feet without dropping me. “Make sure that’s Holly.”

“It is,” Dustin replied, heading up the slope towards the road at a jog. After a moment, he waved at Desmond, who walked towards the road.

I closed my eyes and hid my face against Desmond’s shirt.

“That’s right, Sara. You just hide your pretty face and let me worry about everything. Cry if it makes you feel better. Get it out of your system. Then, you can get some sleep, and I promise you’ll feel better in the morning.”

I doubted I’d ever feel better, but I remained silent. Telling him the truth wouldn’t change things.

Chapter Eighteen

Although I won the battle over riding in the backseat of the car, I had to lean against Desmond because I was too tired to sit up on my own. My wolf minded far less than I did; she found the man’s presence comforting, reminding me of how she reacted when Sanders touched me.

Desmond’s phone rang, and with a sigh, he answered, “Desmond.”

I drew in a deep breath to catch his scent, which had soured from annoyance. My wolf whined, and at her urging, I wrapped my fingers around his wrist. Pulling free, he tucked me under his arm and gave my shoulder a brisk rub.

“Who called you?” Desmond demanded. “No, that’s not a wise idea. Please tell me what he told you, so I can proceed to correct any misinformation you may have been fed.”

I sighed. Holly twisted around in the front seat, reached back, and patted my knee. “We’re going to stop in a few minutes to get you something warm to drink and eat. Any preferences?”

Shaking my head, I wondered if I could get away with not having anything at all. My stomach churned at the thought of food, and even my wolf wasn’t hungry.

“Well. I wasn’t aware she had spoken with you, sir. Were you planning on calling me, or were you just expecting me to do exactly what I wanted anyway?” There was a short moment of silence, and Desmond laughed. “Dead to rights. That’s exactly what I did. The part where she called her mate a string of unpleasantries is, in actuality, true, but he seems to have neglected to mention the part where she called him out along with that piss-poor excuse of a submissive bitch. Did he mention the part where your water witch pulled her lifeless body out of the ocean afterwards? Did he also mention she wasn’t breathing and didn’t have a heartbeat—that’s what I meant by lifeless—thus making it impossible for Dustin to do anything for her?”

I heard something crunch on the other end of the line before it quieted. I trembled at the way Desmond described what I had done, wishing I could disappear forever.

“It’s fortunate their mating bond is strong enough Sanders was able to track her down. If we hadn’t had Dustin with us, sir, she would have died. As it is, she’s suffering from hypothermia, although forcing transformations somewhat resolved the physical issues. Dustin doesn’t believe she was submerged long enough for any brain damage, but she’s currently nonvocal. I’ve been considering yanking Sanders right out from his pack as direct retaliation for what they’ve done. Sara told you the truth, sir. Dustin confirmed it. I sent Sanders ahead to the hotel with his pack and Wendy to attempt to deal with the problem. It seems when she entered the same room with two of the participating Fenerec, she snapped. Unfortunately, neither Sanders nor I realized what they were doing.”

“Dustin, pull over. He wants a word with you,” Desmond ordered. The witch obeyed, and once the car was in park, he reached back for the phone. Desmond shifted in the seat, turning so he could nestle my head against his chest. “I apologize. I couldn’t afford to beat around the bush. Relax, you’re not in any trouble,” he whispered in my ear. “I know of some Fenerec who are, but that’s their problem. They can deal with the consequences of their actions.”

“Yes, sir?” Dustin answered, turning to glare at Desmond. “Stu—ahem, Mr. Sanders was the one who performed CPR, sir. I felt he was the best motivated. She didn’t respond for approximately five minutes. Yes, I did so without permission, sir. Her mate was in no condition to grant permission. He was stuck on repeat until she resumed breathing, and once she did, he was busy begging her not to die, sir. I needed to know what I was working with. If this were my jurisdiction, I’d be pressing charges against every mongrel in that pack with the exception of their Alpha. Please, allow me to be blunt, sir.”

Desmond pinched the bridge of his nose. “This should be interesting,” he muttered.

“Imagine for a moment. You’re a young woman, you’re pretty, and you’re smart, but you have a fake ID. You’ve run away from something, something you perceive as bad enough you don’t want found. You work several jobs. Because you can’t get financial aid, because you don’t exist in the system, you work under the table. You’re a ghost. You manage to get some schooling in on the side, but you’re going to a shit college because it’s all you can afford. So, you’re selling yourself because it’s the only way you can get by.”

When I cringed, Desmond rested his chin on top of my head. My wolf settled, and her calm infected me. The pleasant, soothing warmth she liked so much intensified, and I relaxed.

“Yes, sir, that’s exactly what I’m saying. So, you don’t have a family, and everything gets turned upside down on you. You find out a lot of crazy shit, but there’s a silver lining. There’s this great guy. He’s good enough looking, if you like rugged men who clean up nice. You do. Stop snorting, sir. So, you have a lot of whole new instincts and urges you don’t really understand, but this guy does, and he treats you like you’re actually worth something—and you’re worth a lot to him. This is entirely new territory for you. However, there’s a problem, one he isn’t aware of. This great guy has a lot of overprotective idiot puppies, and they don’t like the idea of you, a pretty little skirt, infringing on their territory. Maybe a few of the bitches want him. Maybe they think they know what’s better for him. So, they gang up. You don’t have any idea how to protect yourself from the emotional aspects of being in such a large family group. Your great guy is used to those who project first and feel second. Problem is you’re a quiet little thing, and you’re not projecting into the bonds. You, however, have a front row seat to how much everyone hates you. No one wants you. You don’t want to complain, because you’ve found such a great guy, and you love him. You don’t deserve him, and you know it.”