Best Friend's Brother #3 (Best Friend's Brother Romance Series - Book #3) (3 page)

“Alexa,” he said as he came towards the bed. “I’ve
been thinking a lot about how to help you. Baby you haven’t gotten out of bed
for days and you’ve hardly eaten a bite of anything. I had a thought I wanted
to talk to you about and honey I know you’re probably going to say no, but hear
me out…”

“Dad, I’m really okay. I wish that you wouldn’t
worry.”

“How am I not supposed to worry? You’re wasting away
in here.”

“I’m grieving, Daddy. It’ll get better…I think.”

“Not if you stay in this bed all the time. I think
we should take you to see a doctor.”

“A doctor?
Daddy, I don’t need to see a doctor. I’m not sick.”

“Maybe you just need something to help you until the
grief passes.”

“Something like what?”

“Something for the depression or anxiety or whatever
is holding you back from being able to live your life.”

He thought I needed to be put on meds for my
depression. “No Dad! I’m not crazy. I’m not taking pills. I can cope with this.
I just need time and I need to do it in my own way.”

“I just want what’s best for you, baby. You’re
nineteen years old and you’ve made a virtual prisoner of yourself in your room.
It’s just not healthy and it can’t keep going on.”

I felt the tears coming again. I tried to swallow
them, but lately they had a mind of their own. “I just don’t understand, Daddy.
Why her? Why did she leave me?” I dissolved into a torrent of tears. He sat
down next to me and gently held me
like
he used to
when I was a little girl. I cried until the front of his shirt was soaked. When
I was finally able to stop, I felt exhausted. Who knew that crying took so much
out of you? I pulled back and said, “I’m sorry. I know I’ve been acting like
such a big baby…”

“Don’t say that and don’t apologize. Nineteen year
olds are not supposed to have to see their best friends buried. I’m so sorry
about that and I wish that I knew why myself. But you and I were just talking
about how full of life she was and how happy she was. Emma wouldn’t want this
life for you, baby. She wouldn’t have wanted to be the cause of this.”

He was right. Emma would have kicked my ass right
out of bed. But Emma wasn’t here…I could get up, but then what? Now that I told
Ian I didn’t want to see him again, there was nobody in my life that truly
understood. Dad was trying, bless his heart, but he didn’t really get it. Emma
was one of a kind and you had to know her the way we did to understand why we
loved her so much. I felt like every day that passed without bringing up her
name with someone or talking about a memory, made her that much more gone…if
that made any sense. I missed her and if I was being honest, I missed Ian too.
I’d been laying here thinking about him a lot. I wondered if I had been too
hasty…too judgmental. I did have a habit of that. It was one of a handful of
things I could thank by mother for.

“Hey Dad?”

“Yeah honey?”

“Do you think people can change?”

“What do you mean, like their personality?”

“Yeah, or their morals and values.
If a person makes decisions that are clouded by personal gain rather than right
or wrong or possible consequences, do you think that person is destined…or
doomed to repeat the same behaviors over and over?”

“No, absolutely not.
It’s human nature to make bad decisions or mistakes. It’s part of growing up
for most of us. I did a lot of things when I was younger that I regret. But
since you can’t change the past, you have to just move forward and make better
decisions as you go along. If I met the guy I was twenty years ago, I wouldn’t
be able to stand him.”

It was what I wanted to hear, yet it wasn’t. I felt
terrible. He was right. We all make bad decisions. I was as guilty of it as
anyone
. I wouldn’t want my mistakes held against me. I
wouldn’t think it was fair if I’d learned from them and grew from them. Ian was
a kid then when he made all of those bad choices. He’s a man now. Those
mistakes he made were a long time ago and they probably had a lot to do with
shaping
who
he is. What I needed to get through my fat
head was that none of them or all of them put together makes him up completely.
It probably says more about his character that he was able to overcome those
things and put his life on the right path. “Thanks Daddy,” I told him. “I’ll
get in the shower and come out and make dinner here in a bit.”

“I’ve already ordered Chinese Food,” he said, “All
your favorites.”

My weight was another source of worry for him. I’d
lost close to ten pounds since Emma died. I never seem to have an appetite
anymore. “Sounds good,” I told him. “I’ll be out in a bit.” He kissed my
forehead and told me he loved me before he left me alone. When he left, I
thought about Ian again. He helped me with my grief process so much that I’m
sure being without him to talk to was what was wrong with me now. I missed him
so much that my chest ached doubly bad. I know that Emma loved her brother and
she was proud of him. She used to talk about him all the time. Emma wouldn’t
have been that proud if he was still doing things that he wasn’t supposed to. She
would have still loved him, but I know she wouldn’t have supported him using
any kind of drugs or cheating in any way. If he had changed and I was holding
all of that against him…I was the one that was wrong.

I wondered again what Emma would have thought of
me and Ian
together as I finally pulled my butt up out of
the bed. I had to go out there and at least try to eat some of that food or Dad
was going to worry himself sick. I looked up and said, “So what about it Emma?
What did you think of Ian and I being together, however brief it was?”

I stood up and my phone began to make its little
alarm sound. It startled me. I didn’t remember setting an alarm. I reached for
it and when I saw the face, I remembered. It was letting me know that Ian had a
fight in one day. I had put the dates all in at the last fight I went to so
that I wouldn’t miss any. It was a pretty big coincidence that the alarm
sounded at the moment I was talking out loud to Emma about Ian. “Was that a
sign?” I asked her. Then I realized that if she
was
here she would have made the sign of an “L” across her forehead and said,
“Here’s your sign, goofball.”

I chose to take it as a sign. Maybe only because
that’s what I wanted it to be. But I decided to go to the fight. I really
wanted to see him, so badly that it was bordering on need.

“Thank you, Emma.” I said aloud to the room
again.
 

CHAPTER
FIVE

ALEXA

I woke up feeling lighter the next day. I’m not sure
if it was the Chinese food and conversation with my dad the night before, or
the fact that I knew I was going to get to see Ian at the fight tonight. Dad
and I talked about some choices for my major. It felt so much better to have
something to look forward
to
. I got out of bed in the
morning before Dad went to work like a normal person and fixed him breakfast.
He was as happy to see me up as I was to be up and out of bed, maybe even happier.

After Dad left for work, I started cleaning. I took
apart the house room by room and even cleaned out closets and drawers. I wiped
everything down and washed every piece of dirty laundry.
By
the time I was done the whole place smelled fresh and was shining.
I
felt as renewed as the place looked.

Before the fight I took a long, hot shower. I did
some of my best thinking in the shower and while I was in there I decided that
although I was going to the fight and I was excited to see Ian, I knew that it
wouldn’t be the time or place to ambush him with my apology and the fact that I
was really hoping we could try again. I would call him later, in a few days and
we could talk about all of that then.

I dressed in jeans and a T-shirt and for the first
time in almost a week, I left the house. Somehow the air smelled sweeter, maybe
since I hadn’t smelled it for so long. I drove to the fight and got in line for
my ticket. Watching the fights was not just about seeing Ian. I loved the
atmosphere. There was electricity to it; everyone was so alive and full of
their
own adrenaline that it was like an energy drink for
me. I sat near the back again next to an older couple. They were really cute.
He was dressed in a suit and a fedora and she was wearing a dress that looked
like she’d had it since the 1950’s but it was adorable on her. While we waited
for the revelries to begin, the old man said, “Why is such a pretty young girl
here alone…if you don’t mind me asking?”

“One of the fighters is a friend of mine,” I said.
At least I hoped that Ian and I could still be friends.

“Which one?” he asked.

“Ian.”

“Oh, we’re here to see the other one. I don’t know
either of them, but my son said I should put my money on
Wreckin
’
Ralph.”

“I hope that was wise,” I said. “I don’t know this
Ralph character, but Ian’s pretty darned good.”

“How’s his boxing game?”

“The best,” I said,
like
I
knew anything about it. “He’s super-fast, so he’s great on his feet.”

“Hmm, then I should hope that Ralph takes him down
to the floor.”

I laughed and he did too and then he said, “My name
is Buster. I was known as Buster Bruiser in my day, and this is my wife, Rose.”

“You were a fighter?”

“He was one of the best,” his wife said. Buster was
smiling from ear to ear.

“I was the welter-weight champion two years running
in ’52 and ’53.”

“Wow, awesome! Well, I’m pleased to meet you both. I
do hope that your Ralph loses, but maybe if you don’t mind you could explain
some of the moves for me? I don’t really understand a lot of it yet.”

“Okay. I just hope you don’t mind a little cussing.
Rose says that I have a potty mouth.”

“That he does,” she said.

The announcer interrupted us then. He announced
Wreckin
’ Ralph first. The guy that jogged down the aisle
was big. Height-wise he was probably the same as Ian, but his shoulders looked
like they were four feet across. His nose was crooked
like
it had been broken a few times and I think part of his ear must have been torn
off and sewed back on…crooked, at some point. Now I hated the thought of Ian
beating him. The poor guy definitely didn’t have looks in his corner and this
sport could only make that worse.

Next we heard, “Ian the “Iceman” Michaels!” I
clapped and whistled and then watched as he came down toward the octagon. He
was wearing dark blue shorts. His eyes looked really blue tonight. Just the
sight of him made my heart flutter. Once the preliminaries were taken care of,
the bell rang and the two men faced off in the center of the octagon.

They danced around each other for a few seconds and
then Ralph was all of a sudden on Ian in a flurry of punches and then a kick.
Ian managed to dodge most of them and then I saw him go in for a couple of
jabs. One of them caught Ralph on the bottom side of his jaw. It looked like it
hurt as he stumbled back. Ian didn’t give him any time to recover before
throwing what Buster told me was a “hell of a right cross
”.
That connected with Ralph’s crooked nose and blood flew out, spattering them
both. I think that must have pissed Ralph off a little because he came back
with a direct hit to Ian’s chest. Ian was knocked back into the mesh and Ralph
continued coming at him, throwing punches. Ian ducked out of most of them and
came back at him with a swing kick (according to Buster) that caught him in the
upper chest and knocked him over to Ian’s left side. Ian didn’t miss a beat,
punching out with his left hand and finishing up with a round kick and an elbow
to the back of the guy’s neck, knocking him face first to the mat. Buster let
out a litany of cuss words that Rose elbowed him in the side
for
.
Ian was on the guy’s back, trying to get an arm around his massive neck. Ralph
was resisting and he’d gotten his legs up and around Ian’s waist. He’d just
managed to throw Ian off as the bell rang, signifying the end of round one.

CHAPTER
SIX

ALEXA

Both fighters looked tired as the bell rang for the
second round. Ralph’s poor crooked nose was bandaged now and Ian looked like he
was limping a little bit. Ralph was quick to strike this time and he threw out
a fast upper cut. Ian dodged part of it. The blow landed, but not squarely so
hopefully it didn’t hurt as much. It still made me wince. Ian threw a punch
that caught Ralph square on the jaw and actually knocked him to the ground.
Ralph scrambled to his feet before Ian could pounce on him and he came up
fighting. He swung his leg out and hit Ian hard in the
obliques
.
I watched him double over and Ralph kept coming at him. Ian stood up to move
out of the way of another kick and when he did, Ralph landed a punch that hit
him directly in the middle of his chest.

Ian fell to the mat on his back and I could tell
that he was having trouble breathing. The big, crooked-nosed son-of-a-bitch
didn’t let up, throwing another kick at him while he was trying to struggle to
his feet. That one caught him in the side and tossed him over into the mesh of
the octagon. I was getting nervous as I watched Ralph grab Ian around his chest
and push him so that he was face down on the mat. Ian was struggling and I was
trying to see his face because I was so worried about him getting air. I didn’t
notice that he was using his legs. He got ahold of Ralph’s legs and in one
swift move he had him in a scissor hold. Ralph was using his elbows on the back
of Ian’s face and the side of his head. At this point, I just wanted it to stop.
The bell blessedly, finally rang. Ralph got up off of Ian and then
I
watched Ian struggle to his feet. He wiped his arm across
his nose…it was bleeding.