Between Shadows (12 page)
Authors: Chanel Cleeton
“Where?”
“Primrose Hill.”
I recognize the neighborhood in the north of London.
“Did we grow up together?”
“Sort of. It wasn’t picnics and play dates, but we saw each other a few times a year.”
Why don’t I remember any of this?
“Were we friends?” I can’t wrap my head around the idea that Luke knew me before. Or that he’s kept it a secret this long.
“Yes and no. We would play together sometimes when we were younger.”
I hear the shift in his tone, the emphasis that he places on the word,
younger.
“And when we got older?”
He’s silent for a moment. “We didn’t see much of each other when we got older,” he finally answers.
Tension fills me, because deep down, a part of me remembers. It’s not a clear memory, but I can see the blurred edges of my life, remember the dream, the blood, that room, and know something went terribly wrong as I got older.
“Why?”
Do I really want to know?
“I don’t know. Once you turned eight or so, I stopped seeing you around as much. And you changed. You mostly kept to yourself. Didn’t talk much.” His gaze is hooded. “You never laughed.”
Part of me is afraid to believe any of this. He could be lying to me, pulling me deeper into his web. And yet, something about his words strikes a chord of recognition within me. I never told him about the dream. He has no way of knowing about the room or my life as Alexandra. Not these parts.
I want to trust him.
“If what you’re saying is true, why can’t I remember? Did I hit my head or something? Is that why I lost my memory?”
“I don’t know. Not for sure, anyway. But whatever happened, everything changed the night of the fire.”
“Tell me about that night.”
His expression is grim, his jaw clenched. “The night of the fire, men came to our door.”
I lean forward.
“I was sleeping,” Luke continues, “but a noise woke me up. I went downstairs and my dad was talking to them.” Something creeps into his voice, something dark and ugly, and suddenly I know that I’m not the only one who remembers that night as a nightmare.
“They began arguing. The men—there were three of them—said that they were ‘taking care of your family.’”
Oh my god.
“The fire.”
Luke nods and my entire world stops. He doesn’t know how much the mention of that night has plagued me, or the guilt I carry with me.
“My father argued with them. He didn’t want your family harmed. And instead of listening to him, I watched as they stabbed my father to death in our living room.”
Horror fills me. All this time, I never knew. He never told me.
“I’m so sorry.”
“I ran,” he continues, his gaze hooded. “I ran to your house. I didn’t see anyone, but the fire was already raging. It was so out of control, the flames were everywhere, and I knew there was no way to save everyone. But my father died trying to protect your family and I couldn’t leave you there.”
Grace was right. This whole time she’d known that Luke was there with us, and for some reason I blocked it.
“You saved us.”
“No. Not really. You were already carrying Grace out of the house when I saw you there. But you were in a daze. You wouldn’t speak. You didn’t speak your first few months at the Academy. Do you remember that?”
I shake my head.
What happened to me?
“They had you in one of the medical wards for weeks, treating your burns, and when you came out you were a different person. You didn’t seem to remember me or anything about your life before. For a while you clung to Grace, and then little by little you began to open up a bit.
“I didn’t know what to do that night,” Luke continues. “I didn’t know who to trust. Didn’t know how far this thing went. And so I did the only thing I could think of. I turned to the only person I thought I could trust.”
“Who?”
Luke pauses. His head turns, his dark brown eyes piercing me. His voice is hoarse, his expression shattered. “I took you to my mother.”
Confusion fills me. “How did I end up at the Academy, then? Did something happen to her…”
Oh my god.
The look in his eyes is all the answer I need.
For a terrible, horrific moment that feels like an eternity time stands still.
My eyes narrow, my gaze raking Luke from head to toe. It’s so subtle; I would have missed it if I hadn’t known to look for it. In most things, he must take after his father. But still, there’s a similarity—in the eyes, perhaps. There is enough of his mother in him for me to recognize it.
Now I know one thing about the Director’s family—
She has a son.
Has he been her spy all along?
Luke’s gaze meets mine, pain flashing in his eyes. “Is that something you would admit? She told me to never tell anyone. She saw that we were close. She said she would kill you if I told you. If I told you any of it. You know what she’s like; she wouldn’t have hesitated. So I never did. And you didn’t remember.”
I struggle to control the emotions raging within me. I want to flee. I want to scream. I don’t know what to believe anymore.
Trust no one.
“Was all of this a ruse, then?” My voice rises in a heady combination of anger and panic. “Just a ploy to get back at me for betraying you?”
“No.”
“Then why did we just break into your
mother’s
office?”
“Because I think she killed my father. And your parents. I think she was the Director back then, too.”
I sink down onto the bed before my legs give out.
Shit.
“You think my parents were affiliated with the Academy?”
He looks me dead in the eye as he delivers the final blow. “I think they all were.”
It explains why they were targeted, the link between my family and Luke’s. But it leaves so many other questions unanswered.
“I was young, too. I remember things, but I don’t know how much of it’s significant. They never discussed Ares or the Academy in my presence. I was just a kid. But it’s a feeling I have. I
know
they were all involved in this together. I just need to see how far it goes. I need to know how big this thing is.”
“Why?” I ask.
“My father was a good man. He didn’t deserve for his wife to have him killed. He deserves justice for what she did to him. Who better than me to deliver it?”
A chill slides down my spine. “So that’s it? You’re risking all of our lives for revenge?”
“What lives? We’re never going to be safe here. They’ll never let us. If you want a chance—if you want a chance for Grace—we have to take them down. It’s the only way. Can you tell me you don’t want justice for your family? For all they’ve taken from you?”
I do, but I’m not wholly convinced it’s worth the cost. Staying alive is the most important concern right now and I have my hands full with that. Part of me wants revenge so badly I can taste it. But the other part just wants to run.
“What are you hoping to find?” I ask.
“I don’t know. Payments linking my mother and the men. Something. Anything. Evidence of how far this thing goes so I know who I have to kill.”
“Did you find the men? The ones who killed your father that night?”
“Yes.”
“Did they tell you who hired them?”
“No. They wouldn’t talk.”
“Did you kill them?”
Luke’s gaze meets mine. Understanding passes between us. I knew what his answer would be before I even asked the question.
“Yes.”
There’s no judgment when I hear his response. I can’t say I wouldn’t have done the same thing. But now I realize that Luke is driven by his own quest for revenge and that makes everything more dangerous. Things get sloppy when it’s personal, when emotions are involved.
“Was your father a good man?”
“The best.” He sits down next to me on the bed. “My mother was gone a lot for work. I barely remember her. He was the one who raised me. He was a good dad. He loved spending time with me; we had these amazing adventures. Looking back now, I think he had to have been an asset before I was born. He had traveled to so many places, knew so much about other cultures.”
I wonder if that’s where Luke got his affinity for languages.
“And your mother?” It’s weird speaking about the Director like this. Like she’s a person with a family rather than a stone-cold killer.
“She wasn’t around much.”
“How do you know she killed them?”
It’s not that I don’t think her capable of it. I think her capable of just about anything. But I don’t deal in hunches or guesswork. I deal in proof, and I want answers.
“I just know. Trusting her was the biggest mistake I ever made. I gave her you and Grace; I went to her because I was scared, and she brought us to the Academy. She killed my father. Family, relationships, none of them mean anything to her. She had me because it suited her purposes. My father was the ideal candidate; he was strong, smart, the perfect asset. They made me the perfect asset. That’s all I was ever meant to be. That’s why she was so angry when we became friends. That’s why she had you try to kill me. She knew—after what happened to my dad—that you would do the one thing I couldn’t forgive. She knew how I felt about you. She knew about us— about that night, about everything.”
I stare at him, horror filling me.
“She called me into her office the day after we had sex. She told me I couldn’t afford the distraction, that she had big plans for me and wanted you out of the way. She threatened to kill you if I didn’t stay away. After what she did to my father, I believed her. So I did.”
I can’t speak. I think back to that fateful day when I received my orders to eliminate Luke. I’ve never told him what really happened that day. Part of me wants to—wants to make him understand. The other part of me? I can’t afford to be close to anyone else. I don’t consider Grace to be a liability; she’s my sister. But Luke is something else entirely. Maybe the Director was right all along—
People make you weak.
She used me against Luke years ago. I can’t afford to keep giving her the tools to destroy us. I can’t afford to give him the tools to destroy me. I want to trust him; I
am
trusting him. More than I’ve really trusted anyone. But that doesn’t mean I know how to trust him with everything.
“What do you want? Really? What’s your endgame here?”
He doesn’t hesitate. “Revenge. Freedom.”
Freedom.
It’s too much to hope for, but it tempts me to risk it all. What would it be like to give Grace a normal life? Is it even possible?
“And you want me to help you get it?”
“Yes.”
“Because they killed my parents.”
He nods.
“And you really think they’re going to kill us?”
“I do.”
There’s nothing left to say. I may be making a deal with the devil, but in this I’m willing to compromise. There’s no way Luke’s lying now; he means to do this and I want to be there when he does. We both have a score to settle and I need to protect my sister. It’s time to choose a side.
I can’t stand with the Academy anymore.
“What do we do?” I ask.
“We take them down. All of them. Anyone peripherally involved with running the Academy. And then we torch the place.”
I can see the trajectory of his plan; I know exactly how it would go down. It won’t be easy. In fact, the odds that we’ll survive are slim. But the alternative? This isn’t much of a life. And if Luke is right, it definitely isn’t the life I want for Grace.
“I’m in.”
A slow smile spreads across Luke’s face, dimples I forgot he possessed winking back at me. Something in that smile sends a memory fluttering through me. A memory of us—just a boy and a girl—hatching a plan. There’s a lightness in the moment; I’ve lived far too long in the dark to not want to grasp it, to hoard it greedily and clasp it to me.
Luke extends his hand to me. I hesitate before taking it, our palms and flesh meeting. We shake. I pull back, but Luke doesn’t release my hand. Instead he holds it in his, turning it over, his fingers tracing the curve of my palm, traveling toward the puckered scar on my wrist.
I stiffen.
His finger traces the scar softly, reverently. “Remember the day this happened?”
We were training together in the gym—practicing with knives. I was sixteen. Luke had been teasing me about something and I lost my balance. My body was too close to his, and even though he’d tried to move away, the knife grazed my skin. I can still see the look of horror on his face, still remember the gentle touch of his fingers on my skin after the bleeding stopped. Maybe that was the day everything changed, the day I stopped seeing Luke as just another asset.
“I’m sorry I hurt you.”
My head jerks up, my gaze meeting his. I’m trapped by the weight of his stare. He’s measuring, assessing, deciding whether or not I’m all in. I know because I’m doing the same to him. I try to hide the feelings lingering in my eyes, afraid of the emotion in his.
“You still don’t trust me.” His fingers stroke back and forth, holding me in place next to him.
I pull my hand from his, barely resisting the urge to rub my fingers over the spot he touched. I don’t trust myself, don’t trust how much I want to trust him, how much he makes me feel.
“Do you trust me?” I ask.
Luke’s lips quirk into a half-smile and the moment is broken. “Of course not.”
###
“We’re missing something.” Luke pushes back from the desk, frustration etched over his face.
“I know.”
“I was so sure there would be something here.”
I scan the screen, stopping on the list of assets and their locations. Some of the names I recognize from my earlier years at the Academy. Most are unfamiliar. There are so many of us, spread out all over the world. We all have our own skills, our own specialties. We’re basically the Academy’s private army.
“Maybe we shouldn’t be doing this on our own,” Luke suggests.
“What do you mean?”
“I don’t know. I just can’t help but think that I’m not the only asset who may know something. Maybe if we could get in contact with these other assets, we could put the missing pieces together.”
“And if we trust the wrong person? Then what? The Academy finds out we’re trying to take them down and then they kill us.”
“Who says they won’t kill us anyway?” he asks.
“True. I wouldn’t even know who to go to for help. It’s not like we’re all friends.”
Luke gets up from the chair, walking over to the window. He leans against the glass, his forehead resting on the pane. His black T-shirt rises several inches above where the fabric meets his trousers and an inch of skin stares back at me. I can’t look away as a familiar heat settles low in my belly.
Luke turns, his gaze meeting mine. “There’s one guy. Maybe. I met him on one of my assignments after I went out on my own. He may be willing to help.”
“Why?”
“Because I saved his life.”
“Who is he?”
“He’s a tech guy. He’s a little eccentric. Lives off the grid. But he’s not a bad sort. And like I said, he owes me.”
I hesitate for a beat. I mostly trust Luke’s judgment. After all, getting caught isn’t in his best interest, either. And still, I’ve ventured way out of my comfort zone. Running a mission like this is a far cry from living within the Academy’s rules and constraints. This will never work without Luke. If I don’t trust him, we’ll both fail.
“Okay. Where is he now?”
Luke flashes me a grin. “He’s a bit reclusive. British. Hates the cold. Loves the beach.”
“Where?”
“Cuba.”