Blind Love (Sulfur Heights Series) (31 page)

Jeremy stomps to the stereo and cranks the volume back up. Stone Sour is bu
rsting my eardrums as Jeremy snatches my arm, pulling me over to the corner of the garage next to discarded car parts and grease rags.

“What the
fu—” His hand flies over my mouth then he smashes me into the wall of the garage. I push back, ready to slug my brother in his face when his bloodshot eyes connect with mine. He’s gone mad. The fucker has jumped off the deep end and he’s fucking lost it. I stop struggling, knowing it won’t get me closer to the truth.

After several moments
, he lowers his hand from my mouth and pushes his finger in front of his lips, motioning for me to be quiet. I’m now really worried. Where the hell has he been since last night and why is he covered in dry mud? I open my eyes as big as I can, pleading with him to tell me what’s going on, but he continues to look at me with his wild, deranged eyes.

Getting closer than normal brothers do to have a conversations
, Jeremy begins to speak. “Don’t. Talk. Just listen to me then walk away. Do you got it, brother?” Unsure of what else to do, I nod in agreement, scared as hell of the words that are going to fall out of his mouth. “Shit is going to get really bad, really fast. I almost guarantee it will.” I strain to hear his words over the booming guitar riffs coming from the stereo. “The money…” he points to the tool chest, “…it’s all we have left.”

“What the fuck are you talking about? Jeremy
, you’re making no sense.” Baffled and dumbfounded, I cannot even process what he’s trying to say.

“They’re going to come for it. In a few days, in a week, maybe in a month…
I’m not sure. I don’t know, but they’re going to come for it and I have to get it out of here.” He leads me over to the toolbox and hands me the piece of metal that hides the safe. I snag his arm, preventing him from kneeling down to the floor, but he jerks it out of my grip.

“What are you talking about? Who’s going to come?” I
’m really worried and looking him over again, I can see his knuckles are torn up, there’s a cut over his left eye and bruises have started to form on the side of his face.

“Once they find Carter, they’ll come and take all of this away.”

My breath has left my body and I now know what he’s talking about. He’s done what he thought he needed to do. He’s done what Reggie thought he needed to do when Darcie’s life was in danger. However, this time, it wasn’t a matter of a person’s survival; the person who’s been harmed is already dead. This has been plotting and purposeful. This is first degree murder anyway you look at it.

“What did you do?” I whisper back to him.

Jeremy stands once again, fueled with an anger and intensity I’ve never seen before. Without raising his voice, Jeremy snaps back to me. “I’ve only done what I had to do to protect our family. To give us a fucking future out of this damn town.” He squats back to the tool chest and clicks open the safe. The duffle bag on the floor starts filling with bundles upon bundles of money. More money than I’ve ever seen in one sitting, and way more money than could have been made from measly hustling gigs.

Kneeling down next to him, I grab his arm
, squeezing tightly to show him how serious I am right now. “Where did all this money come from?” He ignores my question, finishing putting the money in the black bag. “Jer—”

“As soon as they find Carter, you’ll know exactly where this money came from. No more questions please.” He zips up the bag
, tosses it into the Challenger and falls into the driver’s seat. As he’s waiting for the garage door to open, I move to the passenger side, jerking on the handle. I refuse to let him leave without me, but it’s locked.

“Open the fucking door
, Jeremy!” I don’t bother with my volume when I scream at the glass. He nearly runs me over as he backs down the driveway, though, pulling onto the street and vanishing from sight.

***

It’s been two days since my weird encounter with my brother and we have yet to see him. Jeremy doesn’t bother answering our text messages or phone calls. While the rain has continued to fall for the last three days, we all ready ourselves to say goodbye to Presley. I’ve been a walking zombie since the day she died; we all have. The girls can barely make it an hour without shedding a tear and random wails will flood the hallway as Drake wakes and realizes how fucked his life’s gotten in the last few days.

Reggie
has called Drake’s work, letting them know he won’t be in for a while. He was able to get a two week bereavement leave, and after that, he will be fired then replaced if he doesn’t show up for work.

It’s pushing eleven in the morning when the Challenger pulls into the driveway. Jeremy comes plodding up the back steps
, looking like hell. Clearly he hasn’t slept in days as the dark circles pool under his eyes. He says nothing as he heads to the bathroom before the whine of the pipes alerts us he’s in the shower.

Darcie looks over to me with an accusatory eye. “Is he drinking again?”

“I don’t know. I haven’t seen him in days.” She’s looking me up and down, questioning me, knowing I’m hiding something. Which I am, but I can’t tell her Jeremy’s killed Carter because I’m not really sure if he did; he’s never actually said a word.

“I don’t believe you. I can always tell when you’re hiding something
, Jake,” Darcie hisses in my directions and Delilah’s eyes grow when she walks back into the room, holding Mia in her arms.

“I really don’t care what you believe
, and now isn’t the time to have this discussion,” I snap back then stand to Delilah’s side, grabbing Mia from her arms.

The vein in Darcie’s head is starting to show and she’s rubbing the scar on the inside of her wrist
, her telltale sign that she’s going to fly off the handle. Before she can even open her mouth, though, Reggie intercedes, snapping her back. “Now’s not the time for this.” He motions over to Drake’s door then, glaring at both of us, walks to the door and disappears behind it.

Our feud is put aside for now and my gut is aching with dread
, knowing it’s been since the shooting that I’ve seen Drake, really since any of us have seen Drake. He’s locked himself away, suffering in his pain alone. Not even his daughter could get him to open the door, but Reggie has a way of getting through to Drake—to all of u
s—
and I hope this time is just like all the times before.

Angry shouting falls from the other side of the door
when Jeremy emerges from the bathroom, looking slightly better, but still completely different from his normal self.

Reggie comes from Drake’s room and shakes his head. “I don’t know if he’ll ever come out.”

Several minutes go by and we all sit in the living room in silence; every one of us is deep in thought as the pain and grief hangs in the air, choking all of us. Our family is barely hanging on by a thread. I can feel a negative presence living around all of us and it has come the moment Presley died. The emotions are boiling, on the verge of spilling over, and I get the sickest feeling in my gut that this will all get worse before it gets better.

Another several minutes go by
, and I can hardly stand it anymore. I carry Mia over to Drake’s room and open the door. If this little angel won’t get him out, then no one will. We wait and listen to the deep bass of Drake’s voice, and the happy chatter of Mia’s. Then, for the first time in days, Drake is finally standing before us.

He looks as well as anyone would in his situation.
His eyes are bloodshot and swollen, his shoulders slumped over, and his head is hanging down—defeated. He’s a husk of a man. With Mia in his arms, we all follow suit and head down the back steps behind him.

Fastening his baby in
to the Chevelle, Drake backs out of the drive and waits for all of us to follow. Delilah and I get in the car with Jeremy as Darcie and Reggie get into his Camaro. The rain comes from the sky as we drive to the funeral home and say goodbye to a member of our family.

Delilah

The experience this morning was out of this world. We’ve all been trying to function as best as we can, knowing today
is going to be a horrible day, however, when Jeremy came in and Darcie and Jake started to get heated with one another, it left me confused and scared. They are best friends, and if they do fight, it’s never with the rage-filled eyes I witnessed this morning. I don’t want my last night in Sulfur Heights to be filled with fighting and rage. I want to remember my friends for the happy, crazy people they are, and not the dysfunctional family that’s starting to fall apart.

When I
see Drake for the first time, my heart breaks into a thousand pieces. He looks like a walking shell—skinny and pale. It’s apparent he hasn’t eaten or slept in days, only lain in his room and cried.

The rain
is freefalling when we arrive at the funeral home. Razorblade butterflies are swarming inside my stomach, thinking about what we are about to do. Jake helps me from the back seat and doesn’t let go of my hand as we walk up the sidewalk to the funeral home. In fact, he’s holding it just as firmly as I’m holding his. The air is chilled and raises goosebumps on my skin. Emotions are high and the tension is a thick, invisible cloud, cloaking all of us in this anxious energy.

The low lighting sets the solemn mood
as we are ushered through the double doors and our eyes are directed to the focal point at the front of the room. A black casket is half open, my best friend lying inside with white roses shrouding the top. Wreaths we’ve picked out while making the arrangements are present and surrounding the casket on either side. I remember Presley telling me how much she loved the wild flowers behind the house and we’ve requested a beautiful combination of orange, purple and yellow flowers to be woven into the arrangement among the roses.

I look around
at my new friends and my heart breaks even more at knowing this will be the last day I spend with them. I have to cut my ties tonight and head back to Memphis to live the life I’ve been raised to live. Guilt overwhelms me, thinking about my petty feelings at a time like this. I’m standing in the back of a funeral home, staring at my best friend who’s just lost her life, and I’m worried about severing relationships I should have never made in the first place.

The phone message I got from my mother yesterday keeps my head focused on what I’m supposed to do.

She knew exactly how to keep me thinking about my future because she pulled out the biggest guilt trip of all, my father. I’d never defied my dad and would never plan to, and she knows it. It was almost like she knew I was allowing my heart to guide me this last and final trip. With her sick radar, she knew it was time to put a final stake through the relationship with my delinquent friends.

When I activate
d my voice message, my father’s deep bass voice came booming through. “Delilah, your mother has told me what happened to your friend and I’m truly sorry, pumpkin. Losing anyone is never easy. But I want to remind you that I agree with your mother, although you’ve made friends with those folks in Michigan, you have obligations and commitments waiting for you in Memphis.

“
Your big heart can sometimes cloud the better judgment you’ve been raised with. You need to know this is for your own good. You will have an exceptional life with Emerson and he loves you. Just remember as your heart is broken, we are your family and will always be there for you. After tomorrow, say goodbye for good and come home so you can move forward with your life. Presley would want that for you. We all want that for you. Love you, pumpkin.”

My father
was right and I knew Mother and he loved me even though they showed it differently. I’d always been a Daddy’s girl and hated to disappoint him; he had always been in my corner. Growing up, I wish he had been around more, but as an adult, I respect he was trying to make a name for himself and his family.

He’s provided for me in ways a lot of families cannot provide for their children and I am grateful
. I owe this to him, to be the daughter he raised.

I squeeze Jake’s hand hard
, willing his strength to help me get through the next several hours. Now I have to say goodbye to my childhood friend, and later, I have to say goodbye to my best friend and the man I love.

Mrs. Fields takes Mia from Drake’s arms
and walks back to a small room. We all stand in the back of the room, watching Drake slowly walk to Presley’s still body. Faint sobs and tears erupt from my body as I watch him hunch forward and lie half his body on top of hers. His shoulders are quaking up and down from the deep despair. I can’t stand to see him there alone.

Before my feet can take a single step
, Jake has read my mind. He looks to Reggie and Jeremy, nodding his head in Drake’s direction. Then all the brothers walk up the aisle, me and Darcie trailing behind them. Reggie stands behind his right shoulder and Jake on his left. They lift their hands and squeeze. A small gesture with a big meaning; saying,
It’s okay. We are all here for you
. Jeremy, Darcie and I follow suit until we are all holding onto Drake and listening to him pour out his heart.

Words, tears, words, sobs
, fall from his shattered heart until we are all overtaken by his emotion. We stand behind him and morn in unison. Then he leans down, kisses Presley’s lips, walks to the back and he’s gone.

The remainder of the service is a blur as I relive the last moments Drake was here. I witnessed what it’s like to have your soul mate ripped carelessly from your world and how it would be impossible to overcome.

As much as I love the Evans family, this is an emotion I don’t want to experience. I’ve only just let Jake move into my heart, but if I allow him to stay there, who’s to say this won’t happen to me? I could be Drake and be left suffering the remainder of my life, broken and dismantled.

I have to let them go. I have to move away from this place
, not only as allegiance to my family, but for the life expectancy of my heart. I need to protect it. I need to sever everything that’s unknown and scary. I need to sever anything that will be my undoing. I need to sever Jake from my life.

Chapter 23

Jake

A couple of hours pass by and the torture of Presley’s funeral is over.

The private viewing was worse than shoving your hand in a bucket of acid, though. Watching my brother fall apart was enough to make the toughest men—my brothers and I included—release our emotions right along with him. At first, I felt like a pussy for letting Delilah see me cry, but then she just sunk in closer to my body as if to say that she was here for me and loves me. Then I finally let a couple of tears fall.

A few people we did not know came to the service, mostly girls from college where
Presley attended school. After a brief burial service at the cemetery, we pile in our cars and head home.

No one
speaks, we ride in silence and when I look over to my brother, Jeremy, a feeling of sadness seeps through me once again. I’m the only person who knows his secret, and whether I like it or not, he’s going to disappear. Either he will be spending the rest of his life in federal prison or on the run. In either eventuality, the loss of him in my life will be huge. I depend on my brother, he’s the other half of me—the better half of m
e—
and now he’s going to be ripped away from my life. This makes me hate. This makes me hate Carter and hate everything he’s stood for.

When we pull in the driveway, Jeremy slams on his breaks
, stopping suddenly and Delilah is pushed forward in the back seat. I look out the windshield to see Drake is lying in the middle of the driveway. He’s passed out on the concrete in the pouring rain, lying in the very spot Presley has died.

“Oh
, my, what’s he doing?” Delilah whispers from the back seat.

We all get out of the car as Reggie and Darcie pull in the driveway behind us. Drake is holding the neck of an empty bottle of whiskey, passed out drunk on the soaking wet concrete.

“Where’s Mia?” Delilah asks then leaves us to deal with our brother when she runs to the back steps and up into the house. Darcie and Reggie come up behind us and I can hear him tell Darcie to go inside to help Delilah with Mia.

“Come on
; let’s get him up.” Reggie and I bend down, pulling Drake’s limp, six foot four inch frame up. He stumbles, partly awake, barely walking on his own when we drag him to the garage and lie him on the couch. He doesn’t move, only passes out again, still clasping the empty bottle of Jack Daniels. “We need to keep an eye on him. I’ve never seen him this fucked up.” Reggie looks over to all of us and Jeremy steps forward.

“I will stay with him. It’s the least I can do for what I’ve done.” He doesn’t meet our eye
s as Reggie and I both share confused and worried looks.

“What happened, Jeremy?” Reggie asks.

“You’ll find out soon enough.” It’s all he says as he sits on the couch next to Drake and detaches himself from the conversation.

I shake my head to Reggie and we decide to leave the situation alone for now. I know exactly what he’s talking abou
t—
well, I think I do—but it’s not my place to say anything to Reggie until I know for sure what’s really going on.