Katie’s eyebrows rose, and she watched Derek with renewed caution.
“Venom?” Derek asked.
“Vampires have venom on their teeth,” I said. “You might have it too.” I looked up at Lucas. “How do we tell?”
Lucas heaved a sigh and went to Derek. He held his arm out in front of Derek’s face.
“Bite me,” he said.
Katie snorted in the corner, and Julian elbowed her in the ribs.
Derek withdrew, looking utterly repulsed.
“Look,” Lucas said. “I’m not keen on you gnawing on my arm either, but if you have venom, I’ll feel it.”
“Can’t you just smell it?” I asked. I didn’t like this idea. What if Derek’s maybe-venom hurt Lucas? Or what if this sparked some sort of fight? This was a bad idea.
“I don’t smell any venom,” Lucas said, “but it might be something different than I’m used to. We have to be sure.”
“What if he infects you?” Julian asked. “You might not be immune.”
Lucas waved us off. “Just do it,” he said, putting his arm closer to Derek’s mouth. “And don’t get too excited. My blood’s not gonna taste good—I think.”
Derek made another grossed-out face and then looked pleadingly in my direction.
I threw my hands up. This seemed like the best, quickest way to find out, and I didn’t really have a choice.
Derek took hold of Lucas’s forearm and brought it to his lips. He grimaced up at Lucas again, but Lucas just motioned lazily for him to get on with it. Then he bit into Lucas’s flesh. Lucas’s face tightened, blood gushed from Derek’s mouth, and then Lucas yanked his arm away. Derek wiped his mouth on his sleeve, making a face like he’d just tasted dirt.
“Well?” Julian asked.
“It’s clear,” Lucas said as the bite mark closed, leaving a line of blood dripping down his fingers. He wiped it off on his jeans and came back to me.
“That was sick,” Derek said. “You taste like ass.”
“That’s because vampires don’t eat werewolves. Our blood’s not supposed to mix. You need human blood to take the place of yours.”
Derek didn’t look convinced. “What do you mean?”
“You’re dead. Dead people don’t have blood. It dried up when you turned. It’s why you crave human blood—it’s your life force. If you don’t drink it regularly, you’ll go crazy and probably commit suicide or walk into the sunlight or something. At least, that’s how it is for regular vampires.”
Derek’s expression was blank—he didn’t seem to have heard anything Lucas had said. “Dead?” he whispered. “Did you say I’m
dead
?”
“Vampires are undead,” I said as delicately as possible. What little color left in Derek’s face drained away. “But you’re not all vampire,” I said quickly. “You’ve got some werewolf in you, too.”
“No,” Derek said. “I’m dead. I know I’m dead. . . .” He began to breathe hard, which made me extremely nervous since he wasn’t supposed to be breathing. Then he gagged and ran out of the door. Lucas and Julian started after him, but the sounds of vomiting made them stop.
A moment later, my heart broke open as Derek staggered back into the room, his face so gaunt I really believed he was dead. He collapsed onto the couch again. “Water?” he rasped, looking to Lucas.
“No. Sorry.”
Derek grimaced and nodded, swallowing hard. “I think ... I think I need to be alone for a little while. I need some time to get my head around all of this.”
Lucas nodded like he knew the feeling. “We’ll be right outside,” he warned. “Don’t take too long. We only have a few hours till daybreak, and I still gotta find someplace lightless for you to crash.” Then he paused, frowning as though just thinking of something. He stole a look at me and said slowly, “Where’d you sleep today?”
“Found a cave,” Derek croaked. “Had to fight a bear for it, but it seemed to work. I didn’t die anyway. . . . If I
can
die anymore.”
“You fought a bear?” I asked incredulously.
Derek shot me an uneasy glance. “Just a small one.”
“We’ll be right out there,” Lucas said again. “And I’ll find you again if you run.”
“I’m not running,” Derek said. “No place to go.”
Lucas took up my hand and began to lead me to the door, when Derek said, “Faith can stay.”
My heart skipped about ten beats, and I looked up at Lucas hopefully.
“Ah . . . I don’t think that’s smart,” Julian said.
Lucas glanced from Derek to me several times and then said to Derek, “You even
think
about touching her and I’ll kill you so fast, you won’t even know it happened.”
Derek’s eyes burned into Lucas so hot, I had to stop myself from taking a step back. At once, I believed he could rip my throat out in seconds.
“I’d never hurt her,” Derek swore.
“Not yet you won’t,” Lucas sneered and let go of my hand with a sharp flick of the wrist. All three werewolves exited the cabin, leaving me alone with my best friend.
7
BLOOD PACT
I
stood in front of the hearth, watching Derek anxiously. His gaze swept down my body, freezing me like a winter breeze.
“Hey,” I whispered.
I didn’t know what else to say, what to do.
Derek rose and came to stand before me. I just now realized that he wasn’t wearing much—a pair of too-loose blue jeans and a grungy white T-shirt that almost matched the hue of his skin. He should have been frozen in his scanty attire, but he acted as though the cold that bit at my fingertips didn’t affect him at all.
As he came toward me, I noticed something different in the way he walked, in the gait of his step. He had always been graceful, but now it was like he’d oiled all of his joints; they moved without any hint of effort. His body was more toned than ever, and it looked as if he’d grown a few inches too.
As frightening as he was, and as different, I had to say: being a hybrid agreed with him. His skin, though unearthly pale, was smooth as untouched snow and his platinum hair fell across his forehead, grazing the very edges of those ice-blue eyes. The lips I’d once kissed when he was human were petal-pink and puckered out just slightly where his fangs hit them.
Even though I’d practically lived by his bedside for the past month, I felt like I hadn’t seen him in years. I’d never been so nervous around him. His vibe, which I was finally able to read now that his transformation was complete, revealed that he was equally apprehensive.
Derek stood close to me, just a foot away.
“I can feel the warmth of your body,” he said. “Even from right here.” He held his hand out in front of my chest, not even coming close to touching me, yet burning me nonetheless.
“Are you cold?” I asked shakily. Another dumb thing to say, but anything to break the silence.
Derek shook his head, his eyes never leaving mine for an instant.
“Can they hear us?” he whispered, nodding to the door where Lucas and the others stood, probably poised to storm in at any moment.
“I don’t know,” I said honestly. “Can you hear them?”
“Yes. They’re talking about someone named Rolf.” Derek’s pupils dilated just slightly, and his voice came out cracked when he spoke next. “I can hear your blood pounding, too.”
I swallowed hard, wishing that I could somehow muffle the sound of my heart throbbing. No need to tempt the poor guy.
“Well,” I said, ignoring the comment about my blood, “then, I guess maybe they can hear us too.” I paused. “Why? Is there something you don’t want them to hear?”
“I don’t think the boyfriend would appreciate it,” Derek said, “but I don’t care.” His faced melted into a sad little smile. “I missed you.”
My heart was careening off my rib cage by now, and Derek had to hear it, which made my cheeks flush—another temptation. I looked away, trying to hide it. I felt like a flashing neon sign that said,
eat me!
Something icy touched my chin and pulled it up. It was Derek’s fingers. The fact that he was touching me, especially against Lucas’s wishes, was about all I could take. Tears began to form and clog my throat. Reluctantly, I met his eyes.
“What do you feel now?” I asked. “Anything?”
Derek put his hands over mine and I shivered. “I feel scared,” he murmured. “I feel ... alone. I feel like I’m dreaming, mostly, but overall I’m just happy you’re here. I want to keep you with me, Faith. I don’t know if I can take this if I don’t have you around, even if it means watching you with ... with him.” He clamped his jaw shut.
Mine clamped shut, too. I had been ready to tell Derek how this was all my fault. To apologize and tell him how bad I felt, how much I wanted to take everything back. But I looked into those crystal eyes, so different from the ones I was used to seeing on his baby-face, yet somehow still shining with that everlasting warmth and love.
I couldn’t tell him this was my fault. It would crush the last little bit of hope and humanity out of him. He was standing there telling me I was all he had left and that he’d lose it without me. How could I tell him the truth? That I had done this to him?
It would destroy him.
So instead, I sidetracked to the second most important thing and asked, “You feel all of that?
Really
feel it?”
“Yeah,” he said. “You sound like you don’t believe me.”
“It’s just that vampires don’t feel things, regular human things. They lose their humanity over time. I was scared you wouldn’t be the same—that you wouldn’t be my Derek anymore.”
Derek reached up and wiped a tear from my cheek. “I’ll always be yours,” he said. “You have to know nothing will ever change that.” He smiled a little. “Not even death, apparently.”
I let out a little laugh that was mostly a sob. “I know it now. I can still see
you
in your eyes.”
Derek pressed his hand closer against my cheek “You feel like you’re on fire,” he said. “Or am I just cold?”
“You’re cold.”
His face closed down. “Because I’m dead. I don’t
feel
dead.”
“You don’t look dead either,” I said earnestly. “You look alive. Perfect and alive.” I tried to smile, but the truth was that he looked like a corpse. Felt like one too. I removed my hand from his skin, but he kept his on my face.
“At least I can be around you. Touch you, if I want.” He rubbed my cheek, spreading the death around my skin. It was so gross. “The boyfriend won’t like that.”
“He can suck it up.”
Derek’s eyebrow twitched. “Speaking of sucking,” he said, with a hint of humor in his voice. “This whole blood-drinking thing . . . it’s not really my style. What’ll happen to me if I never drink anybody’s blood? Will I go nuts like a vampire?”
I was so relieved to hear those words pass his lips. I might have had a hard time accepting Derek’s habits if he’d been spending his nights murdering people to satiate his thirst.
“I have no clue,” I said. “Nobody knows anything about you. You’ll just have to experiment and find out.”
“So how long have you known about all this?” Derek asked, narrowing his gaze. “That night we spent in this cabin ... you knew didn’t you? That’s why you were so scared of the dark ... and Julian. Jesus, he
changed
that night, didn’t he?” He looked around as if the dingy cabin hid more secrets he could now decipher with this new knowledge.
“I couldn’t tell you,” I said. “The pack would have killed me for it.”
“I wouldn’t have believed you anyway. But—damn. I knew there was something up with that guy.” He glowered at the door where Lucas stood, probably listening raptly to every word we said.
“You were right,” I said. “And I’m so, so sorry I got you involved.”
“I—I can’t say it’s all right, yet,” he said. “Because it’s not. But, I have a feeling that with you to help me through it, one day it will be.”
“It will,” I promised, though I had no idea if the words were true.
Derek was silent for a while, probably mulling things over. I watched the strange angles of his face darken and bloom with the firelight, felt his vibe fluctuate from anger to confusion to grief and back to anger again. He was a mess.
“So, I’m the only hybrid ... thing out there,” he said at last. “Seriously?”
“It seems that way. Lucas told me once that mixing vampire and werewolf blood is like, the worst of the worst in this world. Vampires and werewolves are eternal enemies. They don’t work together as far as I know. So no one’s really tried mixing their blood into one person before—at least not on record. You’re unique, Derek. And everyone’s scared of you—of what a hybrid race means.”
A smile spread across Derek’s lips. “Werewolves are scared of me. That’s wild.”
“You have no idea,” I grumbled dryly.
Then Derek’s smile faded. “Are they going to try and kill me?”