Blurred Lines by KD Williamson (23 page)

“Do you have to be so mean? You know it didn’t bother you one damn bit.”

Kelli’s glared. “I’m not trying to be mean. Look, I have enough to deal with right now, believe me.”

“God, I forgot how big an asshole you are.”

Kelli smiled. Being an asshole was easy. “Glad I could remind you.”

Kelli’s home phone rang. She groaned. It couldn’t be good news, not at this point. She snatched the cordless from the receiver and continued to glare at her unwanted guest.

“What?”

There was a brief pause.

“Kelli? I tried your cell.”

Nora’s voice at the other end was unexpected and took Kelli’s breath away. “Nora.”

“Mine was on vibrate. Why didn’t you call my home phone when you tried to reach me last night?”

All the leftover emotion from her conversation with Antony rushed up to meet her, and she swallowed hard. She turned away, putting her back to the past so she could keep the present moment to herself. Nora got her full attention. Everything else disappeared. “I figured—”

“Are you all right?” Nora interrupted.

The concern in Nora’s voice was hard to miss, and Kelli’s insides went all gooey. “No.” She wanted to tell Nora everything, and even if she had nothing to offer in return, Kelli would feel better.

“Will I still see you later? These past few days I’ve gotten…” Nora words trailed off.

Kelli exhaled noisily. “I probably won’t be good company. We’re finding out about Travis, and this crap with my family. I won’t be cracking jokes, that’s for sure.”

“I know. Come anyway.”

Kelli warmed at Nora’s words. “Okay.”

Ashley cleared her throat. Kelli turned around in surprise. She’d forgotten she wasn’t alone.

Ashley glared.

Kelli ignored the laser beam shooting her way. “I’ll see you then.” She ended the call and looked at Ashley. “Time to go, Ash.”

“Who was that?”

“None of your business. Please don’t do this again.”

“You never talked to me that way. Not even on our first date. She obviously doesn’t know you and the jerk you can be.”

Kelli sighed and wondered what she ever saw in this woman. “Look, I’m sorry.” She pointed at Ashley then back to herself. “This, us, wasn’t happening then, and it’s not now. Please go.”

Ashley’s face flushed with anger, but she turned and moved toward the door. “You’re going to disappear on her too,” she said over her shoulder.

Kelli met her gaze. This was different.
Nora
was different. “No, I won’t.”

Ashley slammed the door.

Kelli stood in the middle of her living room and wondered at her final words to Ashley. They were true, and she knew it. Nora had earned her loyalty and so much more. Her feelings for Nora were new and scary as fuck, but now she had to admit that she didn’t want them to stop despite the shittastic timing.

* * *

Nora sat her phone on the coffee table near an array of colorful swatches. Picking out a new paint color for the kitchen became a distant thought compared to the missed call and distraught tone in Kelli’s voice. All Nora knew was that she had to do something to make Kelli feel better. She still couldn’t figure out when Kelli had become so important. She just…was. Nora had no idea she had the ability to care within her, but she knew who was responsible for uncovering it. Nora was just more when Kelli was with her, and Nora was starting to enjoy the experience.

Then, there was her growing attraction to Kelli. With every visit, phone call, and thought, those feelings increased, and her emotions swirled together in the back of her mind like a slow boiling pot. Nora was certain that if she covered her feelings with a tight lid, this pull toward Kelli would die down eventually, just like liquid when removed from the heat. It was a nice visual, and deep down, Nora knew that’s all it was. A visual.

In reality, if she covered her feelings, the pressure would build until she exploded, and the mess would be a thousand times worse than it already was.

Concerned about Kelli’s behavior, Nora pushed the thoughts aside. She had a choice. She could wait for Kelli to come to her, or she could meet the situation head on. She didn’t weigh the pros and cons. She didn’t analyze the details. In a very un-Nora-like fashion, she went with the feeling lodged in her chest and let it guide her. She grabbed her cell phone, keys, and purse and hurried out of her house.

* * *

Nora knocked on Kelli’s door and waited. The loud creek coming from the neighbor’s doorway didn’t surprise her. She didn’t look in Mrs. Landau’s direction, but the soft snick of the door shutting told her she’d been accepted. She was friend, not foe.

Nora heard Kelli grumbling through the closed door. When it opened, Kelli’s eyes widened in surprise and a small smile curved her lips. But her expression fell quickly.

“Hey,” Kelli said flatly, but there was something in her voice and her eyes that said Nora had made the right choice by coming here.

“Morning.”

Kelli stepped aside to let Nora enter.

“You are the last person I expected to see. I sounded that bad?”

“Maybe I’m just able to pick up subtle intonations in your voice now.”

Kelli smiled again. “So, that’s a yes.”

Nora nodded. “It is.”

Kelli sat on the couch. Nora followed, sitting a respectable distance away. She watched quietly.

Kelli pushed a hand through her hair, making it stand up even more than normal. “I swear to God, I should become the heartless bitch that some people think I am. I can’t be fuckin’ perfect. I just do what my gut tells me is right.” Kelli’s jaw clenched as if she were chewing her words. “I didn’t shoot drugs into Antony’s veins, and I’m sure as hell not gonna go back to a woman who didn’t understand me in the first place.” She threw her hands up for emphasis. “I mean, I knew the involuntary committal was going to make some waves, and I do feel guilty about it. But he had to go. My mom doesn’t know this, but the other times, he didn’t stay. That would kill her if she knew. Things are bad enough. Hell, me, Sean, and even Tony, all agree on that one way or another. Rehab is where he needs to be. That’s all that matters when it comes down to it, and I think—I hope to God—he stays this time.”

Kelli’s expression made Nora’s chest ache. She looked so lost. Her eyes were glassy with dark smudges underneath, and she was pale. Their gazes met, and the urge to reach out to Kelli and physically comfort her was overwhelming. She made a fist, but it did nothing to lessen the impulse. The longer she waited, the more ridiculous it seemed to resist. Nora moved closer and trailed her fingers over Kelli’s hand. She tried to calculate her next move. Finally, her instincts took over for her. She covered Kelli’s hand with her own and squeezed. Kelli did the same in return. Warmth radiated up her arm and moved through her body.

“I’m glad you’re here.”

“Me too,” Nora whispered. She paused and chose her words carefully. Nora wanted to help, not compare their circumstances. This was impossible anyway. “As the attending, my job is to teach residents and push them to be first rate. I’ve not made the best decisions in the recent past, but I can’t be responsible for other people’s shortcomings,” she said. “Neither can you.”

Kelli huffed and smiled tremulously. “Yeah. Damn. I can’t tell you how long I’ve been trying to tell myself that.”

A little unsure about Kelli’s response, Nora said, “This is new territory for me. I’ve never given advice that wasn’t medical in nature—”

Kelli’s thumb brushed over her knuckles and interrupted her speech and thought process. Nora swallowed as the warmth, still present from an innocent touch, became prickles of heat.

“Nora, you’re right. I can’t keep throwing these pity parties for myself.” Kelli pulled her hand away, ending the moment.

Nora looked at her hand. She could still feel the imprint. She realized Kelli had continued talking and renewed her focus.

“I mean, I can’t wallow in all this. Travis needs me probably more today than ever.” Kelli rubbed a hand over her face.

Need. Nora wondered if she needed Kelli as well or was starting to. She put the thought away for another time. “You’re very protective and present for those you care about.”

Kelli shrugged. “Just the way I am, I guess.”

Nora allowed another thought to take hold, and before she could decipher and weigh it, she spoke. “Am I one of those people?” Nora’s face flushed with heat as she finished.

Kelli’s smile was wide, unrestrained. “Yeah, you are.”

Nora experienced an intense flash of excitement that left her speechless. “I…I…”

“That shouldn’t be a surprise.” Kelli’s forehead wrinkled, and she drew her eyebrows together.

Thoroughly embarrassed by her reaction, Nora cleared her throat and said, “No one has—”

Kelli interrupted. “Well, I’ll say it again—it’s their fucking loss.”

Nora faced a different kind of excitement that puddled low in her belly.

Kelli stood. “Do I still get to see you later? I need to get ready to go to the hospital.”

“Yes,” Nora answered thickly.

“Is it okay if I come to you?”

“Yes,” Nora said again, unable to think of another response.

A slow smile formed on Kelli’s lips. “You’re discombobulated.”

Nora stared, but then, she returned Kelli’s smile with one of her own. “Yes.” She felt the tension inside her loosen slightly.

“Since you’re yessing everything, can I have a million dollars? I should, just for using that word. Discombobulate. Bet you were surprised to hear that come out of my mouth.”

“No. And yes.”

Kelli snorted. “Such a fun sponge.” She sobered seconds later. “If it’s bad news, I need to apologize now for anything I might say or do.”

Their gazes met.

“Come anyway,” Nora repeated.

* * *

As the elevator moved closer to Travis’s floor, Kelli grew more nervous and nauseated. She ignored the people surrounding her to concentrate on breathing. Travis needed her calm, collected, and he was going to get that, no matter what she had to do to make it happen.

On the next ding, Kelli glanced at the flashing red numbers. Her stop was next. She muttered an “excuse me” and used her cane to clear a path to the front. The elevator stopped. Kelli took a deep breath and stepped out after the doors opened.

The hallways in ICU were almost empty. Kelli was thankful. The last thing she needed was to run into a nurse with a grudge. On her way to Travis’s room, she found her two favorite people at the nurses’ station. Kelli snorted and decided to take a second to stir this pot. Messing with these two assholes would probably give her the edge she needed to face whatever was around the corner.

As she got closer, Kelli sensed some weird tension between them. And she was about to add to it. Kelli stopped behind them and cleared her throat. The doctors spun around comically. Their eyes were wide, their faces flushed.

Kelli had to stifle a laugh. She flashed a grin instead. “Ladies.”

Rader scowled, but he didn’t say a word.

Fuller’s eyes narrowed. She pursed her lips as if she was struggling to keep them shut.

“Got your little invitation to the party. Can’t wait.” Kelli winked. She didn’t stay for their reaction. She had more important things going on. Kelli was right about her encounter with Rader. It gave her some much needed bluster and a surge of adrenaline.

The door to Travis’s room was closed. Kelli stood outside for a second before walking in. Williams, Sean, her mother, and Gerald Sr. stood around Travis’s bed. They all turned to acknowledge Kelli’s arrival.

Kelli caught her mother’s gaze. They shared a moment and silently agreed that any discussion about Tony would have to wait.

“What’s up, sis. Thought I was gonna have to call you.”

“My place had a damn revolving door for a while, but there was a good part. Nora came over.”

Sean’s eyebrows shot to his forehead, and his lips curled slightly.

“I’m so not going there with you,” Kelli said as a warning.

“Going where?” Travis and Williams asked simultaneously.

Kelli glared at her brother. “You see what you did?”

“I didn’t say a thing! You did it to yourself.” Sean laughed.

“Whatever.” Kelli shot Williams a look. He threw his hands up and grinned. She moved closer to Travis and smirked. “You know Sean is full of shit.”

Travis grinned crookedly. “It’s a McCabe trai—” Travis cut himself off and looked at Kelli’s mom. “I didn’t mean that the way it sounded, Mrs. McCabe.”

Kelli and Sean chuckled.

Carina brushed it off with a wave of her hand. “Eh, we’re all full of shit at one time or another.”

They all laughed, even if it was a little forced.

Kelli studied Travis. She wondered if he was ready to hear what the doctor had to say. Were any of them? Kelli saw fear in his eyes, but there was also determination. His slight nod gave her the answer she needed, and the sudden flash of his smile was just cake. That’s what it all came down to in this whole crappy situation—he was doing his best to be ready no matter what the news.

“If your mother were alive, she’d be tickled at the family you’ve made here.” Gerald Sr. stood tall and powerful, but his voice was as soft as she’d ever heard it.

“You think that’s because we’re white and Irish?” Sean asked.

Kelli swatted at him in return, cuffing his shoulder. “That’s stupid. You’re saying she’d be racist.”

Sean rubbed his upper arm. “Owww, what? I was just kidding. Everybody knows I was kidding?”

Gerald Sr. chuckled. Probably more at their antics than the bad joke. Kelli’s attention went back to Travis. He continued to smile, but it was a little more wobbly.

“No, it’s because you’re white…and crazy,” Gerald Sr. said.

Travis cut through everyone’s laughter just as it started again.

“If it’s bad news, it’s not your fault Kelli. I mean it.”

Kelli was moved by his words. She looked away, hiding her face from him, from everyone. There were too many people seeing parts of her that were not approved for public scrutiny.

“Look at me. Please.”

Kelli exhaled noisily and slowly met Travis’s gaze.