Bonds of Blood [Lords of the Expanse] (Siren Publishing Classic) (21 page)

She watched him leave and had a look of confusion on her face. He didn’t tell her good-bye, he called her “my lady,” and he simply left. She didn’t understand what happened, but she was so emotionally fraught she didn’t put two and two together. She knew he wouldn’t let anyone take their children, but what if he didn’t have a choice? He was a High Lord of the Realm. He was also flesh and blood. What if they chose to remove him from the equation and take their children?

So many things swirled in her mind as she sat on the bed he had just vacated and listened to the doctor telling her what needed to be done. She looked again at the image that the doctor had saved on the work station and sighed. “They are perfect, aren’t they?” she whispered and raised a finger to lightly touch them. “Thank you, Doctor. I will take the supplements and ensure I am eating properly and exercising. Andries already takes care of my need for blood, but I thank you, sir.”

“Of course, my lady.” He had seen the look on the colonel’s face and was going to say something to her about the hurt feelings of a Vampire lord, but didn’t have a chance when she breezed out. Shaking his head, he sat at his desk and sighed. He had a duty to his government to tell about the babies, and while he was terrified of the colonel, he knew he had no choice. So before he could talk himself out of it, the doctor sent the message to the Alliance Highest Lords, including Andries’s father, as well as the holo images.

Sitting back, he steepled his fingers and let out a breath. This was going to be bad, and he knew it.

Xan didn’t go to their quarters right away. She walked through the decks, spoke to the people on board, and simply tried to work through in her mind that she was having twins, not an uncommon thing with her people, but it seemed it was a very, very uncommon thing for his.

Finally she was exhausted and hungry, so she made her way back to their rooms and when she entered she knew something was off. Not sure what it was, she walked to the bedroom and removed her clothes. Taking them to the closet, she opened the door and frowned. All of Andries’s clothes were gone.

Panic started to build as she looked in the wall unit. His clothes were gone from there as well. She turned around and looked into the room and saw that everything that was his was gone. She dropped to her knees there in the closet and wrapped her arms around herself. He left her. She didn’t know the reason he left, just that he was gone.

She sat there rocking herself for several long minutes until she pulled herself together enough to press the comms unit after standing. “Andries?” She knew that even if it didn’t go to him, he would get it relayed to him.

Gritting his teeth as her voice poured into his ear, Andries walked to the war room and inside before answering her. “Yes, my lady,” he said quietly. “Is there something you require?” he asked as he fought his instincts to just go to her even though that’s all he wanted to do.

“Why did you leave me?” she whispered. There was so much hurt and pain in her voice that she couldn’t hide it if she had tried. “What did I do, Andries?” Again it was “my lady” and not Xan or Xandra. What had she done that was so wrong to turn him from loving her to hating her?

“That is what you wanted of me, my lady,” he told her softly. “When you doubted my intentions and cut through my heart, it was what was necessary to be done. I know your customs and I will understand if that is how you wish things to be, Xandra.” He said her name. He shouldn’t have, but he had to say it. It was a craving in his blood.

“No, I never wanted you to leave me.” She placed a hand to her neck. “I was upset. I wasn’t doubting you, Andries, but simply realizing they would
try
to take our children. I know you would never allow them to do so.” She bit her lip and sat down hard. “Andries, I’m so sorry. I never, ever meant to hurt you.” She hadn’t. She actually hadn’t been thinking of much at all as she realized that their children were the first of their kind. “I need you, Andries. I will always need you, and not just because of our children, but because I, the woman, need you. Come home?”

“Are you sure that’s what you want, Xandra?” he asked, using her name again like the caress it was. “You need to be sure, wife, because I will not tolerate your doubt in me or my will again.” Looking down at his hands where he had them braced on the table, he sighed. “If you’d stabbed me with a silver blade, shoved it into my heart, and twisted it, it would not have hurt nearly as much as what your words did to me.”

“I’m sorry, Andries, yes, I’m sure. Come home to me.” She begged, “Come home to me and our children.” She smiled and added, “I promise I won’t even give you trouble for passing out when you found that you were going to be father to not one, but two children.” There was a small pause. “I need you husband. I need you to hold me, touch me. Come home?”

He shouldn’t. He knew she’d hurt him again and he knew it would be worse than the last, but he couldn’t say no to her. “I’m on my way, Xandra,” he said softly before he disconnected the communications and stared down at the table. He was a fool. He’d given her everything of himself and left himself open to pain, and she’d cut him down at the first sign of a problem. Shaking his head, he headed to her quarters. Even in his mind he was remaining distant. He had to protect what little he had left inside. Pressing the button, he waited for her to answer.

Opening the door to him, she wanted to just throw herself into his arms, but his aloof manner had her stopping. She stepped back and motioned him in, realizing that he came without clothes, without his things. She was hurting inside and asked, “What do I need to do, Andries? What do I need to do for you to forgive me for careless words spoken in a moment where my mind was reeling?”

“Is that what it was, Xandra?” he asked, looking down at her and hoping she wasn’t lying to him. Moving a little closer, he resisted pulling her to him. “Were you just speaking carelessly and without thought in the heat of the moment?” Gods, that sounded nasty. “Did you just react and not realize that the accusations you were throwing about were hurtful?”

“No.” She looked up horrified, the truth in her eyes. “I never have doubted you, Andries. I have trusted you from the moment that I saw you so ready to throw everything away just so that I could be free. No, I would never, could never hurt you like that.” She bit her lip. A single silent tear dropped. “I was just so upset. I didn’t realize how…big…our having twins was. I mean, I should have clued in when you fainted, but until the doctor was talking about tests and blood work, I didn’t.” She shook her head. “I know you would never allow our children to be harmed, Andries. I know you would take up arms and make them run you through first. It was just, I wasn’t thinking. I was more realizing that they would
try
to take our children than anything.”

That single tear broke him as nothing else could. He hated to see her cry. It cut him even deeper than her painful words and doubt could. Moving then, he cupped her cheek and brushed the tear away as he lowered his head to hers. “They can try all they want, Xandra, but no one, ever, will hurt what is mine. I’ve told you this over and over, but now you need to hear me, wife,” he said sharply. “You are mine and I will never let anyone hurt you. Our children will know only love, our love. The Alliance can try to do anything they want, and I will kill every single one of them to keep you and our son and daughter safe.”

She nodded. She completely believed him because she knew he was more than capable. “I know, Andries.” She cupped his cheeks and smiled. “You take care of us.” Xandra leaned in a little closer, her lips a hair’s breadth from his when she whispered, “And I will keep you safe. I love you, Andries. You are everything to me.” She needed to feel him with her again, needed him to believe in her and love her once more.

“As you are to me, Xan,” he murmured and then closed the small distance between them. He kissed her softly, keeping his need to reclaim her under wraps. He knew he had to be gentle for now, to show her that he could be gentle, that he could love her, would love her always, and did love her completely through actions alone. Shifting his arms, he picked her up gently and moved to set her on the table, his lips teasing over hers, his tongue probing deep and, now that they were free, his hands moving to stroke her body.

She shuddered and grinned. “I think that we have a table fixation, Andries.” She would always, always have wonderful memories of tables. “I firmly believe our children were conceived on your war room table, so if we ever have to leave this ship, it comes with us.” She had no idea what she was asking, but she wanted it. To her it only made sense. “I would like to conceive each of our children on that table.”

“I have no intention of giving up my ship anytime soon,” he told her softly, and then he had a thought. “Do you want me to leave the military, Xandra?” he asked hesitantly, unsure if that was what she’d meant by the comment and yet wary of jumping to any conclusions. He didn’t want to hurt her. He couldn’t hurt her, unlike what she’d done to him. Cupping her cheek he stroked her skin. “I will if you wish wife.”

“No.” She shook her head madly. “No, you are military through and through, Andries. I couldn’t ask you to leave the military any more than you could ask me to allow you to be left behind.” She knew he would argue and shook her head. “No, where you go, so, too, do I, Andries. We are in this together, my love.” She cocked her head to the side. “I just thought you got a new ship anytime they came out. I know that’s what my father did.” But she should have known that wouldn’t be what Andries did. He would be one of those that would keep what he had and simply ensure it always had the latest and greatest of everything.

“Why would I get a new ship?” he asked, his confusion obvious. “The one I have may have its problems, but they are known to me and my crew. I acquire new technology for it when it becomes available, but I could no more get rid of my vessel than I would want to let you go, Xandra.”

And that was the sweetest thing that he ever said to her. “That’s what I thought. Well, when I stopped long enough to think about it, that is.” She watched him and then with a grin said, “I’m glad that the men of your ship know me, because they all get to be here for our children, and then when I get pregnant again, and again.” At his confused look, she said, “I’m not leaving you, Andries. Ever. If you go on a mission, so do I.” Which had her smiling. “And we will just use that war room table to get pregnant time and time again.”

Snorting at her words, Andries shook his head. “And if it was not the table?” he asked her softly. “What if it was another place or another time we were together?” he inquired. He wasn’t quite so sure about that. By his calculations and the doctor’s, it had been the table more than likely.

“It was the table.” She had laughter in her eyes now. It replaced the pain from before. “You know it was, too. I see it in your eyes, Andries, and you are sitting there trying to decide just how many times you will let me into your war room, how many times you will let me become pregnant.”

“As many times as you wish, my lady wife,” he told her softly. He’d give her the world if he had it within his power to do so. “But we should wait until we have these two before you start planning the rest of our brood, love,” he suggested with a hint of a smile.

She touched her hand over his and nodded before moving their hands to her belly. “You do know I will never let you live down passing out when we found out we were having twins, right?” Her thumb moved over the back of his hand even as his thumb moved over her belly. “And it stands, Andries, if you pass out when I’m birthing your children, I really will likely hurt you.”

“I was shocked,” he told her honestly, needing her to understand. “Never, not once in the history of my people, have there been multiple births. I couldn’t believe that I would be responsible for not just one, but two young ones, Xandra. It was too much for me to process unfortunately, and I regret I passed out on you. I did not mean to. I tried to remain at your side, but it hit me hard.”

She smiled and nodded. “Thank you for explaining it to me.” It was so much nicer when he talked to her and did not walk out. “Your son got a kick out of it and your daughter was worried for you.” All the way until he left and then both children had been in an uproar. “He protects her. Even now he protects her.” Why the change in subject, she didn’t know. “He doesn’t allow anyone to be able to feel her, unless he wants them to.” Which was why the twin had been missed in her first visit to the doctor and medical bay.

It is the way of things for our people, my love,” he said softly, stroking her belly gently. “As a race, Vampire males always protect their women. He will be fiercely protective of her, likely even more so than I will be,” he teased gently with a slight smile for her.

She grinned and shook her head. “I don’t know if that is possible, Andries.” There was amusement in her eyes as she said, “I can see you being the daddy who will follow our little girl on a date and if even one touch is given to her that she doesn’t want.” Well, she felt for the boys that would date their daughter. “But he will be very, very close.”

“What is this ‘date’ you are referring to?” he asked as he went through the dictionary of human references in his mind, searching for the term. “And why would I follow her anywhere with a male?” Sometimes what she said was very confusing.

“It was an ancient custom and one that I saw in the village where I lived a lot,” she explained. “A date is when a boy likes a girl, and a girl likes a boy, they will get together and go out alone to find enjoyment. I say you will follow them because the dates usually happen in dark places where the boy and girl can, well, do almost anything,” she said with a grin.

Nodding slowly, he then froze and gave her a suspicious look. “Just what sort of anything might they be doing?” he asked her softly, his mind already leaping to highly dangerous thoughts. “What are you not telling me, Xandra, my wife?”

“Well, in the villages”—she swallowed—“many of the girls lost their virginity on these dates.” She rushed out on a breath. “But that’s not something we have to worry about for a little while yet, Andries. Right now we will just worry over ourselves, right?”