Breakaway: A Cassandra Kresnov Novel (v1.1) (45 page)

"What's this?" Vanessa knelt behind her, putting a chin on her shoulder to read. Her cheek was warm against Sandy's ear, her short hair tickling. Sandy smiled. She'd never had such an intimate connection with any non-GI before. The relationships with her Dark Star team had been paternal, a brooding mother caring for her flock, protecting them from a world she understood far better than they. Here, with Vanessa, she was uncertain if that paternalism had not in fact been reversed. It was a very warm, very pleasant feeling, and totally new to her. She rested her own head against Vanessa's, and sighed.

"Just work. Network security, other stuff I've been working on."

Vanessa's dark, tired eyes scanned the mass of data-technicalities across the screen, visual three-dimensional representations, adjoining text/data adjuncts, multiple visual layers to be blinked up at need. Simple format.

"You can read this crap?" Vanessa sounded amazed. Sandy shrugged gently beneath the weight of Vanessa's chin.

"Just data. Data's ..."

"... Easy, yeah, I remember, you told me." Put an arm around her for balance, sagged tiredly against the back of the chair. "Studying for the Parliament appearance?"

"Yeah. Wouldn't mind making a good impression."

"This won't do it." With a nod at the screen.

Sandy frowned. "How d'you mean?"

"Sandy, no one doubts your abilities. They expect you to have amazing skills. And comprehensive knowledge from all your military experience. They need to be convinced that you'll use it to their advantage, and to Callay's advantage ... and that politicians like them won't get the blame for you screwing them over."

Sandy let out a long breath. "Well I'm not sure if there's going to be a personality exam prepared. I'd like to just convince them I'm useful."

"Oh, they know you're useful. They just need to be convinced you're not dangerous."

"I am dangerous."

"Not to them."

"Yes I am. If I turn out useful and trustworthy, that's a master stroke to the President. Makes her look like a genius, helps all her allies, makes her opponents and all the people who opposed me look like misguided bigots ...

"That'd make half the Callayan population misguided bigots with them ..."

"Sure, but who's going to remember that afterward? The public's always right, Vanessa, even when they're being total morons-that's the main thing I've learned about democracies. People are fickle, they change their minds and leave politicians who've committed fully one way or the other stranded. If politicians perform backflips, or look twofaced, it's because the public forces them to be."

"Wow." With weary amazement against her shoulder. "You've been here less than two months and you're already turning into a total political cynic."

"No I'm not. I like that the public can change their mind. It means politicians have to be flexible, and take all public mood-swings into account. Nothing's more dangerous than a narrow-focused leadership with a closed mind. Look at the League."

"True," Vanessa conceded. "They'll love you for that bit of rationale, it clears them of any blame for being slippery worms."

"Maybe I'll try it on them. Anyway, I'm expecting to be attacked by people who desperately want me to be the bad guy, because it serves their purposes. There's your cynicism."

"Sure, the media do that all the time. They get great ratings mileage by demonising you. Then as soon as the public mood swings, they'll go after great ratings by lauding you as a hero instead." Wrapped both arms more firmly about Sandy and the chair with a sigh, weariness gathering. "So, you've had a busy day, huh? Two firefights, catching up with your old buddies at the Embassy, flirting with Ari ..."

"No, I don't flirt with Ari, Ari flirts with me."

"Ah, that's right, you don't think it qualifies as flirting unless there's penetration ..."

"You're not accusing me of being unsubtle, are you?"

Vanessa grinned. "Never. You ready to desert back to the League yet?"

Vanessa's flippancy still surprised her. But only a little this time.

"Has that worried you?" Sandy retorted.

"Just a little, yeah." Sandy frowned. Vanessa didn't sound anywhere near as flippant there. "I mean you've hardly been warmly received. Pea-brained morons in admin, conservative politicians, religious leaders, alarmist media ..

"I don't spend my time with them," Sandy cut her off. "I spend my time with you and your guys and Intel, mostly."

"It doesn't hurt? Being tiraded against in public? Burned in effigy?"

"Maybe. But I'm used to it. I think I'm coming to understand the politics of it, how ordinary people think, how they receive and construct their information, their view on the universe. I see hope. Truthfully, I'm far more of a political hot potato back in the League. Recruitment there has never admitted to creating a GI like me. I don't know if the public's found out by now but there'll be hell to pay when they do, I'd have to live in isolation from all the furore that would start. I'm far freer here than I would be there."

"That's true."

Sandy felt the weight increasing against the back of her chair, as if Vanessa was slowly falling asleep. She reached and put a hand to the back of Vanessa's head, a gentle, improvised embrace.

"I wouldn't leave you," she murmured. "I've never had a friend like you."

"I've never had a friend like me either." Dazedly tired.

Sandy ruffled her hair, and planted a long kiss on her cheek. "Go to bed."

"Bed. That's a good idea." Rested her forehead against Sandy's for a long moment first. A simple gesture. It made Sandy feel warm all over. This was what love felt like. She'd felt it before, with GIs of her old team. But somehow it'd never been quite like this. They'd loved her as a reflex, their squad leader being the central figure in their universe, holding them all in awe with her capabilities. It'd been impossible for them to feel otherwise. She'd loved them back, affection for affection.

Vanessa, though, had a choice. Vanessa was her own person, and was under no obligations over where to place her affections. And Vanessa was amazing. She'd studied business, but ended up hating the corporate world for its moral sterility. She was smart enough to be very rich if she'd wanted. Pretty enough to have spent a life accumulating adoring menfolk (and the occasional woman) in a salivating pile at her feet. Personable enough to have hobnobbed and brown-nosed her way up the corporate and social ladders to the very top.

And instead, she'd gone against all the social norms for pretty, intelligent, sophisticated young women who preferred books to VR-sims and knew the French Revolution for an historical event beyond the famous Parisian nightclub on Ramprakash Road. She'd joined the CSA, become a SWAT grunt and gone on to become SWAT's most celebrated team leader, for which she received a moderate government salary, public anonymity and, lately, a reasonable chance at violent death or injury. She saw the universe in big-picture, and wanted what she did in life to matter. Lately, it had mattered-a great, great deal, in fact. It was the kind of imaginative, morally centred, dedicated passion Sandy had always suspected of existing in the civilian world, and particularly in the Federation, free from dogma, military discipline and a narrow-focused view of the universe. Not everyone had it. But Vanessa did. Vanessa, to Sandy's eyes, was amazingly, incredibly special.

And of all the people Vanessa had chosen to love as a close friend, she'd chosen her. It blew her away.

Vanessa got up on weary legs and swaggered slowly over occupied bedrolls in the dark to her empty bedroll beside where Hiraki was still stretching, bent low and grasping one extended ankle, forehead to shin.

"You sure you'll be able to sleep without your bed of nails?" someone nearby teased him in a low voice. Hiraki fancied himself as something of a modern day samurai, and led a very disciplined, frugal lifestyle by any standards, let alone Tanushan standards.

"Sleep, vile scum," was Hiraki's reply. Everyone liked Hiraki. But they were glad Vanessa was squad CO.

Vanessa pulled off her tracksuit and stretched, a sinuous rippling of slim, wiry, muscular limbs. Someone wolf-whistled while she was bent to touch her toes, clad only in underpants and small, cut-off undershirt that left her flat stomach bare.

"Children," came Zago's deep, murmured reprimand from across the room. "I'm surrounded by immature children, one sleep-out and everyone thinks they're back in school camp." Zago was in his fifties, married with five children, and enjoyed his role as squad "senior." Someone farted. All those still awake collapsed with laughter. An enhanced vision-shift through the dark showed Sandy that even Hiraki was smiling. Vanessa just sat on the floor, head in hand, shaking uncontrollably. It was a release of tension. Sandy had seen it even among supposedly tension-resistant GIs. Straights required far more, she'd discovered.

"Do GIs fart?" someone thought to ask.

"I refuse to answer," Sandy replied, "on the grounds that any statement may be self-incriminating."

"Children," repeated Zago. Vanessa resumed stretching upon her bedroll.

"Do that bending-over stretch again, LT," came Singh's voice. "I was enjoying that."

"You won't enjoy me breaking your kneecaps," retorted Rupa Sharma, SWAT Four's only other woman besides Sandy and their beloved CO.

"You could do it instead, Rupa, I don't mind either way." Some laughter and poking went on across where Sharma was lying. A smacking sound of Sharma swatting someone away.

"I knew it had to be a mistake trying to sleep in a room full of this many men," she muttered.

"Where's your sense of adventure, Rupa? This is your chance to be a sexual legend! A shot at the record books!"

"I'd rather sleep in a farm yard."

"Whatever gets you going, I guess."

"Well," said Vanessa, finishing her stretching and climbing tiredly into her sleeping bag, "you guys can do what you want over there, but I warn you, any attempt to penetrate the CO will be met with stern disapproval and extra duty."

"Arvid," Sandy added over the muffled giggles from around the room, "I'll have you know I own those record books."

"I'll believe that," Singh said agreeably. "Good night everybody, sleep well, and try not to think of the LT's tight little arse and shapely thighs ..."

"There's nothing further from my mind, I assure you," said Kuntoro, who was gay.

"Seriously," Sharma complained, "someone take him out in the cor-

ridor and shoot him."

"Can't," said the usually laconic Tsing, "Requisition Order 32b, non-operations-related ammunition requested for the purposes of disposing of irritating squadmates must first be signed for against the authorisation of ..."

And was cut off by exhausted, uncontrolled laughter-even Sandy found herself grinning. And reflected that most of her old Dark Star team would probably have been asleep by now ... except maybe Tran and Mahud, who alone of her team might have stayed awake talking while the others followed procedure and went to sleep. Again, civilians did things differently. Perhaps, she thought, whatever the situation's difficulties, a few minutes' extra sleep were not as important as the emotional comfort of knowing one was not alone. In Dark Star, they had fought because fighting was the act that defined their existence. In SWAT Four, they fought for their homeworld against those who wished to harm it. It was a cause they all shared, even the macho types like Johnson, whose primary reason for joining was "tough-guy" self image. Even through their casual banter, they reminded each other of the togetherness, and sense of community, that drove them in their task. The togetherness was what they were fighting for. A place, a people and a cause.

Sandy smiled to herself in the dark, feet up on the table and reading from her screen as the conversation continued in hushed, laughing tones ... feeling that something very significant had slipped profoundly into place. This was what it felt like to belong to something. To be willing to fight, and even to die for it. And for the first time in her life, she knew what she was fighting for-it was messy, it was complicated, it was often exasperating and downright infuriating. But it was something worth protecting, and something that was in evident need of her protection. And after so many years of uncertainty, regret and doubt, this sudden, delightful onset of clarity felt like ... liberation.

he Grand Congressional Hearings Chamber was as impressive to sit in as the name suggested it ought. Located on the fifth floor of the massive nine-storey Parliament complex, the ceiling extended all the way up to the roof in a grand, arching dome, patterned with tiles and inlays of Islamic inspiration. The lighting setup reminded Sandy of mosques she had ventured into, a circular arrangement of long, suspended lamps that formed a clear circle above the middle of the huge room between ceiling and floor. The lamps themselves were more in the style of European chandeliers, though, as were the wall panelling, and the enormous, wooden altar-like benches at the front of the room.