Breathless (134 page)

“Of course not,” I teased back. “What’s there to miss?” I smirked at him.

“You tell me.” He gave me a wicked smile. “Maybe some
extracurricular
activity you did last night will jog your memory.” He winked at me, and with that, he left me to my drink and headed over to the other end of the bar to take the drink orders from a group of girls that had been giggling and eyeing him since they walked in a few minutes ago.

I rolled my eyes as I sized up the group of girls. They were definitely cute and they were
definitely
not shy about flirting with Damian. I felt a tinge of jealousy and anxiety as I carefully watched his interactions with them. I could tell he was being his natural charming self, but I wasn’t sure if it was merely an act as a bartender or if he was actually interested in one of them.

I slowly sipped my drink and started to get lost in my own thoughts.

Why did I convince myself to come here? I knew I shouldn’t have seen him again so soon if I could have helped it. I know he affects me in a way that scares me.

I looked down at my drink and sighed. I knew there were better things to do with my time than to sit here alone, competing for his attention. And yet there I was, glued to the barstool and watching him like some lost puppy. I knew he was dangerous to my heart. I knew he probably wouldn’t give me what I wanted. And yet, I couldn’t help it. I had an addiction, and Damian was my drug. A thrill I’d never felt before ran through me when I was with him —an unbelievable high that could only be compared to sheer euphoria.

“Penny for your thoughts?” I heard Damian’s voice say.

I blinked and saw him standing in front of me with an amused look on his face. I smiled up at him to see him studying me. “Oh, nothing. Just…thinking about work,” I lied. From the corner of my eyes, I caught a glance of the group of girls he’d been talking to minutes before. They were sipping their drinks and eyeing us from the other end of the bar.

“And here I thought you were thinking about me with that dreamy look on your face.”

I blushed. “You
would
think that.”

“You want another drink?” He nodded to the drained glass in front of me.

“No. I should get going. It’s Sunday and I have some errands to run before the work week starts.” I noticed the group of girls still staring at us. “Besides, it looks like you’ve got your hands full.” I motioned towards the girls.

He followed my gaze and one of the girls winked at him. He laughed and turned back to me. “It’s all a part of the job. Don’t be jealous.”

“I’m not,” I scoffed.

“Right. Well, even if you’re not, you should know that none of them holds a candle to you.”

My face lit up and I smiled at him, swooning over his words. “You
are
sweet, Damian.”

“Just as long as you keep that between you and me.”

“My lips are sealed.” I got up and threw a twenty-dollar bill on the counter for my drink. “Okay, it’s errands time.”

“Hey, your money is no good here.” He shoved the bill back toward me.

“Who said I was paying for the drink?” I said in a low, seductive voice. “Let’s just call that a tip from me to you.” I winked at him, turned, and walked away. As I strode out of the bar, I knew with near certainty that he had watched me walk away, and at that moment, I felt like I was on top of the world.

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

Damian

“HEY, BABE. I’M GOING TO THE pottery studio for the afternoon. Have a good day at the bar. I’ll see you for dinner?” Alexis walked behind the bar counter to give me a hug.

“Yeah, for sure.” I smiled and pulled her in for a goodbye kiss.

“Don’t miss me too much,” she teased as she moved her arms down my back. She grabbed both of my ass cheeks and gave them a squeeze as she pulled my pelvis hard against her body. My cock responded to her instantly and grew hard against my jeans.

Even after two months of sleeping with her, she still had the ability to turn me on with little effort.

“Oh! I sense someone’s going to miss me.” A devious smile curled on her lips as she unzipped my jeans and reached in to greet my hard erection. “I’ll definitely miss this,” she moaned as her fingers moved along my shaft, making it pulse with need.

“Fuck, Alex. Don’t do that to me and then leave. That’s just wrong. Let’s go upstairs. I’ll teach you a lesson and you’ll beg me not to stop,” I warned as her hand moved faster.

“It’s not my fault you go commando all the time and make the pistol easily accessible.”

I laughed. She had named my cock “the pistol” since we started having sex regularly.

“Come on, baby. Just ten minutes. I’ll be quick,” I begged.

She giggled and zipped up my jeans, confining the pistol back in its cell. “That’s what you said last Saturday, and I ended up getting to my own class fifteen minutes late and all flushed and sweaty.”

“You must have looked so fucking hot,” I groaned as I pulled her closer toward me, rubbing her pelvis against my growing erection.

She kissed me. “You can have your way with me tonight. I promise,” she said as she moved away. “But I can’t be late again.”

With that, she was out the door, leaving me to stare after her with a hard cock pushing against my jeans.

It had been almost two months since that night Alexis and I had sex for the first time, and we have been spending a lot of time together—in and out of the bedroom. I hadn’t intended for things to go for this long. She was amazing in bed, and in the beginning, I had convinced myself that there was nothing more to my feelings toward her. She was hot and an amazing fuck. But after two months, we had developed some routines together, like our go-to sushi take-out restaurant, Friday movie night, and mind-blowing sex at least once a day. I had gotten used to her around in my life, and as much as I denied it, I liked having her around.

About an hour into my afternoon shift, I was in the back stockroom going over inventory.

“Hey, boss,” said a voice up from at the bar. Beth, one of my bartenders, walked into the stockroom.

“What’s up?”

“Your girlfriend just called. She—”

My stomach lurched at the word she’d used. “I don’t have a girlfriend,” I snapped, interrupting her abruptly.

Beth looked affronted by my outburst. “Oh. I… Well…”

My expression softened as soon as I realized how rude I had just behaved with my employee. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to snap at you.” I took a deep breath. “But just so we’re clear, I don’t have a girlfriend.”

There was a confused looked on Beth’s face. “So…that girl, Alexis… She’s just a friend?” There was an emphasis in her voice when she said “friend” because she knew quite well what I did with most girls I called friends.

“Yes, she’s a friend. And a neighbor.” I felt uneasy by my own words, but I brushed the feeling aside before it could fester.

“Sorry, I didn’t know. You seemed to be spending a lot of time with her lately, and I haven’t seen you flirt with any girls or take any home with you at night after we close up the bar, so I just thought that she was…” Her voice trailed off and I knew what she had wanted to say.

“Hey, I gotta get going,” I interjected before she could say anything else. “It’s a slow afternoon, so can you take care of the bar?”

“Not a problem, boss.”

“Thanks.” She gave me a worried look but didn’t say anything else as she watched me quickly bolt out of the bar.

I went straight up to my apartment. I wasn’t sure why but I felt panicked and cornered with no way out. I sank down beside the side of my bed and found it difficult to breathe.

What the fuck is wrong with me? Why did Beth’s comment throw me into a frenzy?

Alexis and I were just fuck buddies. This was what I had been telling myself repeatedly for the past two months. There was no way she was my girlfriend because I didn’t do girlfriends.

So why am I so annoyed over Beth’s misplaced comment?

As if to my answer my question, something Beth had said echoed in my mind. “
I haven’t seen you flirt with any girls or take any home with you at night after we close up the bar…
”

I realized that she was right. Ever since the night I took Alexis out to Swan’s Oyster Depo, I hadn’t slept with any other girl. Now that I thought about it, I wasn’t sure why this thought hadn’t crossed my mind until now. I used to sleep with several different girls every week, and never the same ones the next week.

How have I gone through two months of just having sex with one person? Why am I affected by her this way?

I drew in several slow, deep breaths to calm myself. Then I saw something from the corner of my eyes: my black shoebox.

I need to fix this, and fast!

I opened the shoebox and a crumpled piece of paper sitting on the top of the heap of papers caught my eye. I grabbed it and saw that I had written “Redhead - 9” on it. I read the note scrawled on it:

You know it felt good in my hands, but it’ll feel amazing in my pussy. Call me 415-888-6914. XX - Courtney.

I remembered her now. The hot redhead who had given me a public handjob across the bar counter. Before I could think twice, I grabbed my phone and dialed the number written on the paper.

A girl picked up on the third ring. “Hello?”

“Is this Courtney?”

“And who’s asking?” There was something seductive and inviting in her voice, like she received many calls from men.

“Is this the same hot redhead that gave me that amazing handjob at Damian’s?” I asked huskily.

“Damian. Well, it took you long enough to call. And here I thought you forgot all about little ol’ me,” she pouted.

I ignored her need for reassurance and attention. “Wanna come over and fuck?”

I heard her suck in a deep breath. “I’m always down to fuck when you’re in the picture.”

“I live above the bar. Can you make it in thirty?”

“Baby, for you, I can make it in twenty,” she purred.

“Perfect. See you then.”

“I’m wet already. See you soon.”

Fifteen minutes later, my intercom buzzed.

Shit, she’s fast
.

“Yes?” I called into the intercom.

“This red pussy is wet and ready,” said a sultry voice.

“Get your ass up here then,” I said into the intercom and pressed the button to let her in.

When I opened the door, Courtney stood there with a short, tight black dress on. My eyes shot to her breasts that were spilling out of her dress.

“Hey, baby.” She bit her bottom lip as she flipped her hair to the side.

“Let’s fuck!” I ordered. I pulled her into my apartment.

“That’s what I’m talkin’ about.” She removed her dress to show her naked body. She gave me a sinful smile. “I don’t like wearing any underwear or bra.”

“Easy access for me,” I groaned.

“Your turn,” she demanded as she pushed me up against the wall and starting unbuttoning my shirt. She pressed her lips urgently on mine. She hands quickly unzipped my jeans and pulled out my cock. “Well heeello, big boy,” she purred as her eyes widened at the sight of my cock. “If it’s this size now, I can’t wait until it’s rock hard and inside me.”

I let out a groan as her hand moved rapidly along the length of me. But as she kissed me again, everything felt all wrong. As hard as I tried to block it, I was consumed by a nagging feeling that wouldn’t allow me to enjoy this moment.

You don’t have a girlfriend. You don’t have a girlfriend
, I kept repeating to myself.

I watched as Courtney started kissing me down my naked chest and abs.

What is wrong with me? Why can’t I enjoy this like I used to?
I looked down at Courtney, and in many ways, she was the female version of me: hot, cocky, and all about non-committal sex. Everything about her should have turned me on. Plus, from extensive research, redheads were wild in the bedroom.

So why does this feel so wrong?

One thought came clearly to my mind: Alexis.

No!
I protested inside. A girl like Courtney was who I should be fucking, not Alexis. She wasn’t right for me. She wanted something more than I could offer—than I wanted to offer. But even when I thought that, I knew that wasn’t the truth. I knew deep down that I’d never been so crazy about someone like Alexis before in my life.

I looked down at the redhead again. She had reached the jackpot. As I watched her lips wrap around my cock, I was riddled with unfamiliar feelings of guilt and self-hatred, and I knew this was not what I wanted. I knew I couldn’t go through with it. I knew this because all I could picture in my head was Alexis—and only Alexis—and her lips on my cock.

Just as I was about to stop the redhead from deep-throating me, my front door opened, and my heart froze when I saw the last person I wanted to see at this moment.

Alexis
.

She just stared at me without saying a word. But it was undeniable from the crestfallen expression on her face that pain and sadness hung in the air between us. This caused an uncomfortable sharp sensation somewhere inside my chest to cut through my body like a cold steel blade.

All I wanted to do was to run to her and try to explain that I’d made a mistake, that I’d gotten weak and scared. But even at this moment, a familiar tiny voice in my head echoed,
You don’t have a girlfriend
.

And as if controlled by that voice and that mentality, I heard myself saying, “Hey baby. Wanna join us?”

It was then that her silence broke and red rage swirled in her eyes. “Join you?!”

“Damn,” I mumbled. I had a feeling she’d react that way.

“Fuck you, Damian!” She turned to leave but then changed her mind and turned back to us. “No! Better yet, go fuck her! And then go and fuck yourself!” With that, she stormed out of my apartment. I felt my insides tighten as I watched her disappear out my door.

“Shit,” I exclaimed as I threw my clothes back on. I glanced at the redhead. “You should go.”

Then I raced after Alexis and found her going down the stairs to her apartment.

“Hey! Hold on, Alex.” I grabbed her arm to try to stop her.

She spun around and yanked her arm out of my grip. “Don’t you dare call me that! You don’t deserve to call me that!”