Bring me to life (The golden collection) (30 page)

             
He brought his hands back down. He leant back on his desk with his arms folded. He looked amazing. "I ...." He looked down at his feet and swallowed hard. "I can't do this any more...." He looked back at me. "Nothing works Georgina. Maybe it would be best if you left?"

             
All of the sudden the wind felt like it had been punched out of me. He didn't want me to work for him any more. I placed a hand over my mouth. I felt sick. What happened to the golden rule; I know we broke it yesterday but today was a new day. I shook my head. He was just angry and didn't mean it. After what I told him the other day about me loving working here.

             
Why would he be cruel?

             
Why take something I loved and enjoyed away from me?

             
"You don't mean that?" I hesitated I couldn't take my eyes off his. I urged him to say no that he was just angry. He didn't say anything just nodded. I felt tears running down my face. I was fed up with crying.

             
Why did this man make me cry?

             
I hated him  really hated him!!  He didn't bother to move to comfort me. What he said yesterday about me using him was wrong! He had been using me.

             
I turned around. There was no point being somewhere you weren't wanted. I walked over to my desk and grabbed my bag. Maybe it was for the best at least now I didn't have to have anything to do with him again.

             
I took once last look around the place I had enjoyed being for a few weeks. I noticed Maxwell leant against his office doorway with his arms folded in front of him. His eyes were wide and he wasn't blinking.

             
I turned back around and headed for the lift. The doors open and I stepped inside. As I pressed the button to ground floor I could see Maxwell running towards the lift.

             
The doors closed.

             
I grabbed hold of the rail. My legs felt like they were going to give way. I had felt like this before. The very first time I ever met Maxwell Thomas.. My Mr Golden rule.

             
I leaned my head on the wall and my tears began again. I couldn't control them. Everything felt like it  was falling about. My whole  world was being crushed.

             
I heard the lift ping and tried to gain control of myself. I wiped my eyes and smoothed out my hair. I couldn't go home looking a state otherwise Blake would be back to give Maxwell another broken nose.

             
The doors opened...

             
I looked up at HIM!!

             
He was standing arms out straight holding the doors open. He was breathing heavily he must of ran down the stairs. My heart skipped a beat.

             
I really did love him... I placed a hand on my chest and I could feel myself biting down on my lip.

             
"George" he panted, he grabbed hold of my wrist and dragged me into the lobby. "I don't want you to leave like this. Let me explain."

             
Oh he didn't what me to stay. I thought this was going to be one of  those dramatic moments; Where the leading  man goes running after the woman he loves and begs her to stay!!!

             
This was real life and he still wanted me gone.

             
I looked down at my shoes. I didn't actually want to be here any more.

             
He placed his finger under my chin and lifted my head up. His eyes were warm and the anger glare had dissolved. "I'm sorry if you think I'm being cruel- I really am not. It's just that invitation has made everything real. You're getting married and it kills me. I have never been in love like this before.." He stopped slowly running a finger along my cheek. "I'm begging you. I will even get on my hands and knees if so means. Don't marry him, be with me and make it official."

             
We stood for ages not saying anything just looking into one another’s eyes. My head was still hurting and I felt sick. He really did love me and I really did love him. This was too hard and it wasn't something I could decide here and now.

             
Then my own words came back to haunt me...
Maybe it was for the best at least now I didn't have to have anything to do with him again.

             
I thought about the time we had spent together London, Cannes, his place and yesterday at the hotel. All the lying and hurt I was doing to Blake. I closed my eyes and the memory of my birthday celebration came to mind.

             
All that care and thought...

             
Wow!!

             
To love two men at the same time was an awful thing. I had promised myself to Blake and I really couldn't back out. Even if I spent years thinking of Maxwell at least I kept my word.

             
I opened my eyes. "I can't" I whispered. He placed his hands over his face and back away a little. "I'm sorry, Maxwell." I stepped forward and placed my hands on his chest. "I love you too but I promised Blake. I can't go back on my word. Just forget about me and move on. You'll find someone 10 times better than me." I stood on my tip toes and kissed his cheek. "I'll never forget you!" I breathed as I turned to walk away.

             
I walked through the lobby and outside. I couldn't look back. I didn't want to see what I had just given up. My heart felt it had been smashed into a thousand pieces. My poor Mr Golden rule. Although, he wasn't mine any more. I heard my phone gone off. I reached into my bag and pulled it out. One message received... I opened it up...

I'll never stop loving you, Miss Dawson xxx

Mr Golden rule xxx

             
I stopped in my tracks! Should I go back? I wanted to. However, Blake and the wedding were my reasons not to. Everything was organized apart from my dress. I felt confused, numb, sad and most of all lost. Grief even. I looked back at the phone and hit delete.

             
It had to be this way for everyone’s sake. I had set him free to go on and live his life. We both could. There would be no more lying, no more drama and no more secret meetings. I could no longer cause him any more pain. He could get on with his business without my distraction. I took a deep breath and carried on home.

*        *         *

              The day to pick my wedding dress was a upon me. I felt rough. I hadn't slept or eaten since Thursday. I was mourning the lost of my job and Maxwell. Friday I had spent all day in bed in spite of Blake's complaining. He just didn't understand how important that job was to me. If I had to hear him say "There will be plenty more!" one more time I was going to hit him with his camera.

             
I was sat in Amy's little sports car. She was driving us to Banbury to check out a wedding dress shop she had found on the internet. This time next week I would be getting married. I cringed at the thought. I did love Blake but everything felt rushed and out of my control.

             
I looked down at my phone. Maxwell hadn't got in touch with me. He was obviously doing what I asked him to do. I kept wondering if he was seeing someone else. I know it had only been two days but he was a beautiful man. Any woman with a chance could easily snap him up with a click of their fingers. I rested my head on the back of the seat and gave a big sigh.

             
"What's wrong with you?" Amy asked her eyes focused on the road. "Isn't today meant to be every woman's dream come true? Finding that amazing dress to wear when you declare your love for the man of your dreams." I rolled my eyes and didn't reply. "Take that as a no!"

             
"What's wrong with me?" I winged. "I love Blake, I really do but....."

             
"Georgina you're just having second thoughts. This perfectly normal. Plus, you have lost your job and that can be depressing it's self." She parked up the car. I guess we were here. "Come on  they hand out free champagne."

             
I shook my head. "I've gone off Champagne" I laughed. Amy looked at me like I had two heads. We got out the car and headed in the direction of the shop.

             
"What happened to your job?" Amy asked lighting up a cigarette.

             
"I really don't want to talk about" I groaned.

             
"Why not?" Amy stopped in her tracks and grabbed my arm. "It's got to do with your fuck-able boss hasn't it?" She looked concerned. I wasn't in the mood for sharing anything with her or anyone else.

             
"Ex boss!!" I snapped. "I said I don't want to talk about" I carried on walking leaving Amy behind. I didn't know exactly where I was going. I looked up and there was massive sign Bride for a day!!!

             
I rolled my eyes. I really wasn't in the mood for trying on dresses, parading up and down and pretending it was going to be the happiest day of my life. I stepped inside and blonde woman ran towards me. She was dressed in a pink suit, with big earrings and pink bright lipstick. She gave a massive smile.

             
"Hi" she sang happily. "My name is Bella. How can I help you?"

             
Amy was now next to me. She held her hand and Bella looked at her as if she was crazy. "Yeah! We need a bridesmaid's dress and a wedding dress. You got any?" I could hear the sarcasm in Amy's voice. Bella avoided Amy and looked directly at me.

             
"Are you the bride?" she smiled.

             
"Yes" I replied looking down at my hands.

             
"Well that was obvious" her eyes diverted back at Amy and then to me. "What sort of wedding are you having?"

             
I shrugged my shoulders. I didn't have a clue about my own wedding. Just that the envelopes for the invitations were gold.

             
How pathetic was that?

             
It was meant to be the happiest day of my life and I didn't even know what the cake looked like.

             
"Oh" Bella pouted. This woman had a really annoying high pitch voice. "I think I have the perfect dress for you. What colour do you want your bridesmaid to wear?"

             
"I want red!" Amy ordered. "Because it's fucking sexy!!"

             
I had to cover my mouth to stop the laugh. Bella looked horrified and scurried off.               "What a bitch!" Amy said loudly. We noticed a velvet pink sofa and took our places. "Why won't you tell me what happened?" Amy sighed. "You're my best friend and I share everything with you."

             
I sat back and folded my arms. "This really isn't the place to discuss this" I hissed. "Besides, you don't share everything...." Amy glared at me. "You don't!"

             
"Oh my god.... That Maxwell fucker has changed you!"

             
"He has not!" I spat. "You really want to know?" Amy nodded her head. "Really? Well....."

             
"Here we are" Bella was walking over to us carrying a dress draped over her arms. She stood before us and held it up. The dress was amazing. I could feel my mouth open wide. I had never seen anything like before. It was utterly beautiful. I stood up and walked over Bella. I ran my finger along the fabric. The satin felt lush.

             
"It's an elegant A line Venus Satin gown featuring a scooped neckline, lace halter, a lace-up corset back and chapel length train. This is a very flattering dress and is in high demand. You're in luck this is the last size 8 we have."

             
"Can I try it on?" I was hypnotized by this dress itching to see what it looked like and what it felt like to wear something so beautiful.

             
"Rachel" Bella screamed. A young brown headed girl ran from the back of the shop. "Will you help Miss ???" She looked at me... Oh, I hadn't introduced myself because of Amy's sarcastic remark.

             
"Miss Dawson" I smiled.

             
"Will you help
Miss Dawson
get into this dress?" The brown headed nodded and took the dress off Bella. I couldn't let the dress out of my sight. I followed the girl into the dressing room.

             
"Now what to do with you?" I heard Bella say to Amy.

              I was standing on a platform in front of four mirrors. The dress was perfect and fitted like it was made for me. Bella had also found shoes and a diamond tiara. I was breath taken even if I told myself. This was how it would feel to be a princess.