Broken (The Broken Series Book 1) (19 page)

My walls tightened around him as he plunged into me, deeper and deeper. My hips ground against his as he pushed into me again and again, building a rhythm.
 

A light sheen of sweat coated his upper body as his muscles tensed with each thrust. His breath was coming faster now, matching mine. Harder and faster he pounded into me.
 

My breasts bounced with each thrust. I could feel his cock throbbing inside me, and it was enough to tip me over the edge. I clutched at him, pulling him closer as my climax rushed through me. I felt Jack slam into me again and again as he came.

When the warm waves of my climax gradually receded, I unwrapped my legs from around Jack’s waist. I didn’t have the energy to do anything else. That had been … unbelievable. I’d never climaxed so hard in my life.

After a moment, Jack lifted his weight from me and rolled over to lay beside me. He fumbled for my hand and pulled it up to his mouth to kiss my fingertips.

My eyelids were starting to droop. I knew I should go and find Lauren and try to straighten things out, but I was so tired.
 

I felt Jack’s arms encircle me and pull me tight against his warm, hard body. Safe, and satisfied I drifted off to sleep.

Jack

I lay there and watched her sleep. I’d woken about twenty minutes earlier after a night of uninterrupted sleep. That hadn’t happened in a while.
 

I watched the sun slowly filter through the slats in the blinds as dawn broke. The soft morning light made her skin glow.
 

She slept with one arm tucked beneath the pillow and the other flung back, so I could see her naked outline beneath the thin white sheet. My eyes drank in her body hungrily, and the sight of her nipples, a hint of dark pink against the white sheet made me hard in an instant.
 

I reached over to trail a finger along the sweet dip of her waist, and she moaned once, half-asleep before turning over and blinking up at me.

At first she was all sleepy and disorientated, and then suddenly her eyes widened, and she sat up, clutching the white sheet to her chest and looking at me in horror.

It was enough to seriously dent my ego.
 

I reached out, putting my hand on her thigh, not wanting this to end.
 

I could sense what was going to happen next. I would have done anything to stop it, but I didn’t know how.

She swung her legs out of the bed, looking at me over her shoulder.
 

“This shouldn’t have happened … I mean … I’m really sorry. It was all my fault … I’d had too much to drink,” she said. “I should never have done this. I …” She looked back at me, her hands trembling. “Will I lose my job?”

I pulled myself up into a sitting position. “What are you talking about?” I snapped. “Of course you won’t lose your job. Nothing has to change.”
 

She misunderstood me and nodded slowly. “Yes, you’re right; this was just a little blip. Things can go back to normal and we can forget this ever happened. I’m so sorry, Jack, I really appreciate you understanding.”

“Stop apologizing,” I said. “You haven’t done anything wrong.”

Her eyes widened again. “Oh, God, I didn’t think … Your legs? Are you okay? I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

“For chrissake,” I snapped. “I’m not that fragile.”
 

I couldn’t help being angry. I wanted to ask her not to leave, to tell her last night was amazing and I want to do it all over again. In fact, I’d prefer to keep her in bed with me all day. But I said none of those things. I just snapped at her. I was so frustrated.

I watched as she pulled on her panties, keeping most of her body covered with the sheet. She caught me staring and made a little sign with her finger for me to turn around.

“If you wouldn’t mind.” Her voice was stiff and formal, nothing like the breathy way she’d called my name last night when I’d been inside her.
 

How could things have changed so much in the space of a few hours? I wanted to pull the sheet aside, and kiss those soft lips of hers until she was begging me to take her again.
 

But I didn’t move. I did what she asked and averted my gaze.

I felt the shift as she got up from the mattress, and I could hear her pulling on her clothes.
 

“I hope nobody else is up yet,” she said. “I’ll just die if anyone sees me. I mean, with this evening gown it’s pretty obvious that I’m wearing the same clothes as last night.”

I said nothing. She’d made things perfectly clear. She regretted everything.

She only did it because she felt sorry for me, and now she was ashamed. She didn’t want anyone to know.
 

And who could blame her? She could have anyone she wanted: a man who could walk without a limp and live a normal life, without fury and resentment dominating his thoughts.

Last night I was a fool to let myself think that things would be different.
 

For one night, she’d needed me, and I had been happy to fulfill that role. I’d been stupid to expect anything more.
 

“I’ll see you in a little while,” she said, gathering up the last of her things and walking towards the bedroom door.

I didn’t bother to turn around.

“Sure,” I said and kept my gaze fixed on the window.

Kristina

I did the walk of shame from Jack’s wing of the house back to my own room.

I practically held my breath as I rounded every corner, expecting to see disapproving looks each time I entered a different corridor.

When I heard Alexander’s voice coming from the informal dining room, my heart leapt in my chest. If he saw me, he’d know what I’d done and sack me on the spot.

Who could blame him? I’d acted like a total tramp. Last night, I’d only thought of myself and my needs, I didn’t even consider hurting Jack. My cheeks burned with shame.

I remembered just how passionate sex had been last night and bit down on my lip. He didn’t seem like anything was holding him back. In fact, it was quite simply the most amazing sex I’d ever had. Despite his injury, Jack had been stronger and more athletic than any of my previous partners. I’d known what I had wanted from him and I’d taken it.
 

I sighed with relief when I made it back to my room without anyone seeing me, only to jump when I saw Lauren sprawled across my bed. She’d obviously been waiting for me and fallen asleep. I had the champagne to thank for that. I dreaded to think what would have happened if Lauren had come looking for me and found me in Jack’s bed.

I shuddered. I couldn’t let her see me like this. She’d guess what I’d done immediately. I headed straight for the bathroom and gasped when I saw my reflection in the mirror. My mascara and eye makeup had smudged, making me look as well as feel like a total tramp.

I pulled out a cosmetic wipe from my toiletry bag and set to work trying to clean the black smears from the skin around my eyes.
 

I was trying to think about anything other than what I had just done. But my mind kept coming back to the huge mistake I’d just made.

Why did I always have to self-sabotage? For the first time in years I had a great job. I’d been able to travel to Europe and live in a mansion for chrissake.

I’d promised myself I would make this work, but now I couldn’t see how to get past this. I’d handed myself to Jack on a plate and it wasn’t surprising he hadn’t turned me down. I’m mean, Jack was a guy. But I couldn’t let myself think for a fraction of a second that he was interested in anything more than a quick fumble under the bed sheets. Only it hadn’t been quick… it had been amazing.

Images of last night flooded my brain, and I felt my nipples tingle in response. Holy hell, who was I kidding? Last night had been amazing! Perhaps if I could control my feelings and treat this as a casual thing we could …

No. No. No.

I had to stop this now before it got out of hand. My personality could not handle this. A small taste of Jack Harding would just make me crave more.
 

I didn’t know what it was about him, but he had some kind of power over me. One look into those deep, brown eyes and I was lost. I just couldn’t resist him. I couldn’t say no.
 

He had a certain way of looking at me, with his dark burning eyes, which made me feel so powerless. I threw the cosmetic wipe into the bin in irritation and head straight for the shower.

That was crap and I knew it. It wasn’t Jack’s fault this was down to me. I had to be stronger than this.

I spent at least twenty minutes in the shower, letting the hot water flow over my body. And as the streams of water trickled down over my shoulders and my breasts, I couldn’t help remembering how it had felt to have Jack’s hands on me last night.
 

If I didn’t feel so strongly, this would be the perfect set up … but I just knew I was going to get hurt.

You had to take risks in life, I realized that. And you never get anything worthwhile by hiding from reality.
 
But I wasn’t ready to deal with these feelings I had for Jack.
 

I hadn’t managed to put my broken pieces back together again yet, and if I was shattered one more time, I wasn’t sure I’d be able to find all the pieces, let alone stick them back together.
 

I grabbed my bottle of strawberry shampoo and squirted a great dollop on my hair.

I knew Jack was only after a bit of fun. He was a man stuck up here in this mansion all alone, without the endless female groupies he’d no doubt become accustomed to over the years. He had an itch he had to scratch, and I just happened to be around.
 

But the problem was, for me, it wasn’t just sex. I wanted more than that, but I could never get it from Jack Harding.

I wrapped a fluffy, white towel around my body and I let out a deep sigh, hesitating with my hand on the bathroom door handle before I wrenched it open.
 

Lauren sat on my bed, with red crease marks on one side of her face from where she’d been laying on my crumpled-up sheets. Her eyes were blazing.
 

“Where the hell were you?” she demanded. “I was so worried. I spent an hour looking for you.”
 

I deserved her to be angry with me. I had been really irresponsible. I had known she was worried about me, and I should have gone to her as soon as I’d got home.
 

I chewed on my lip. A simple ‘sorry’ just wasn’t going to do it. She was really pissed.

I hated what happened last night and the position it put me in.
 

I couldn’t believe the timing. Why did they have to have the drugs laid out in front of me just as Lauren walked in the door?

I know everything happens for a reason, but every now and then I wished someone could tell me what that reason was, just a little heads up, a little clue.

Because I felt like I was fighting every single day to make sense of things.
 

There was so much I wanted to say to Lauren. I wanted to explain how it felt to have the drugs set out in front of me, tempting me. I wanted to tell her I would never have actually taken anything, how she walked in at just the wrong moment.

But I didn’t say these things, instead I got defensive.

“What were you doing there so early anyway? Spying on me? I didn’t think you were coming to the party until later.”

Lauren put her hands on her hips. “Alexander was talking business, so he told me to take the driver and he’d pick us both up when he’d finished in an hour. And it’s a good job I did.” She looked pointedly at me.
 

“I didn’t do anything, Lauren. There were drugs on the table but they were nothing to do with me.”

Lauren raised an eyebrow, and I could tell she didn’t believe me. I couldn’t put into words how much that hurt.
 

I know I didn’t deserve her trust, but I wanted it so badly.

I felt betrayed, but that didn’t make sense. After everything I’d done in the past, I didn’t deserve people’s trust.
 

My shoulders slumped, and I let out a defeated sigh and walked across the room to sit at the edge of my bed. I cradled my hands in my lap and stared down at them, twisting the silver ring on my finger. My mother had given me the ring on my sixteenth birthday.

“Lauren, I want to be able to convince you that you can trust me. I promise you I didn’t take anything.”
 

She was nodding, but I knew she didn’t believe me. She moved around to sit beside me on the bed, and I felt the mattress dip.
 

“Well, I have a solution,” she said. “A way that you can prove it to me.”

I turned to face her. “What solution?”

“There’s a clinic. It’s in Monte Carlo. They’ll take a blood test and a urine sample. If you’re clean, we’ll forget the whole thing.”
 

I got to my feet unbelievably annoyed. I put one hand on the bedstead and looked away from her. I was so furious, I couldn’t even look at her.