Burning Bright (6 page)

Of course
. ‘You don’t want Flynn to know?’ I said. Siobhan shrugged nervously. ‘He’ll get mad. He’ll worry Gary’ll hurt me or something. You know
how overprotective he gets, all that walking me home from the salon.’

I frowned. ‘I thought you liked him doing that?’

‘I did,’ Siobhan admitted. ‘But now . . .’ She tailed off.

‘Now there’s Gary . . . ?’

Siobhan nodded.

‘Tell me about him,’ I said.

Siobhan hesitantly explained how Gary was a hair stylist – the son of the man who owned the salon where she worked. From what she said, he sounded not only lovely, but awesomely hot. For a
moment, Siobhan’s eyes lit up as she spoke, then she sighed. ‘But I still don’t know if I should go out with him.’

‘Why? What’s the problem?’ I stared at her, bewildered.

Siobhan curled up on her beanbag. ‘I’m scared,’ she said. She looked at me. ‘I mean, suppose he turns out to be like Da . . .’ She paused, twisting her long, pale
fingers together. ‘Or Flynn?’

‘Like Flynn?’ I looked at Siobhan, a chill settling on my chest. ‘Flynn would never hurt a girl. He’s never hurt me.’

‘Not physically, maybe,’ Siobhan said. She kept her green eyes fixed on me. ‘But he’s scary when he’s angry, isn’t he?’

‘He’s just passionate,’ I said defensively. ‘People don’t understand how strongly he feels about things.’

Siobhan looked away.

‘Anyway, we were talking about you and Gary,’ I said, eager to change the subject. ‘Why not just give him a chance? Go to the cinema or out for a coffee with him? Something
simple. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want.’

‘You’re right.’ Siobhan nodded. ‘It’s just . . . just such a big deal.’ She looked up at me. ‘Um, River, you promise you won’t say anything to
Flynn, will you?’

‘No.’ I knew I was making a mistake promising that. But what choice did I have? ‘No. Course I won’t.’

Flynn arrived home a couple of hours later. We talked for a bit about how ridiculous Mum was being, agreeing again that there was no way she could stop us seeing each other. I
persuaded Flynn to come home with me so we could try and reason with Mum together. I had some vague hope that if I could just get Mum to have a proper conversation with Flynn then she would realise
how great he really was.

I don’t know what planet I was on.

Mum appeared in the hallway just as we shut the front door. She had obviously been crying. I felt a pang of guilt at the sight of her exhausted, tear-streaked face.

‘So you’ve decided to come home, then?’

‘Mum?’ I said. ‘I’m so sorr—’

‘What’s he doing here?’ Mum shot a poisonous look at Flynn.

I put a restraining hand on Flynn’s arm. ‘He’s come with me so we can talk to you,’ I said quickly. ‘I’m really sorry about last night, Mum. But it
wasn’t Flynn’s fault. It wasn’t his idea to do that switch thing with Emmi. That was—’

‘I don’t want to hear it,’ she said. ‘One lie after another. You have no idea what you’re putting me through.’

I could feel Flynn’s arm muscles tensing under my hand. I didn’t dare look at his face. I could just imagine the thundercloud building behind his eyes.

‘Please, Mum,’ I said desperately. ‘I don’t want to—’

‘I am so disgusted with you,’ she shouted. ‘You stupid little—’

‘Don’t speak to her like that.’ Flynn’s voice slammed down on Mum’s like a sledgehammer.

She turned on him instantly.

‘How dare you shout at me,’ she yelled. ‘Encouraging River to—’

‘How dare
you
shout at
us
,’ Flynn yelled back. ‘We haven’t done anything wrong. Nothing. You just can’t accept . . .’

‘Get out.’ Mum pointed to the front door.

Flynn stood there, staring at her, his fists clenched.

My heart sank. Having promised me he would make every effort to keep his temper, Flynn had lost it completely in less than a minute. I looked at Mum again, at the way her lips were pressed
meanly against each other. There was no way she was ever going to approve of Flynn. No way she was ever going to be happy about my seeing him.

‘Mum?’ It came out as a whisper.

She turned to me, her eyes hard and narrow. ‘Obviously, I can’t stop you going out with him, River. Not without locking you inside the house whenever you’re not at school. But
I don’t want him here. And I want you to let me know exactly where you are from now on. I’m going to speak to your dad about it, as soon as I can get hold of him. Yes, and you’re
not getting an allowance anymore. Not until you’ve come to your senses.’ She turned to Flynn with a final sneer. ‘Maybe without River paying for you all the time, you’ll
lose interest. Emmi’s mother told me you’re well known for your ability to take from others.’

Flynn’s jaw dropped open as Mum spun round and swept away from us into the kitchen. He took a step towards her, a low growl in his throat.

‘No.’ I grabbed his arm. ‘There’s no point.’

I threw an angry look at Mum, then tugged him outside. We stomped away down the path.

‘Can you believe she said that?’ Flynn shouted – his voice deep and loud above the fierce hiss of the wind. ‘She more or less accused me of being a thief – just
like they did at school.’

He yelled the whole way to the park, and was still mouthing off about it when I dragged him across the grass to the bench outside the little café where we’d met on our first date a
few months ago.

‘How dare your mum say all that,’ he hissed as we sat down. ‘She’s got no idea.’

I shifted uneasily on the bench. It was one thing for me to criticise Mum. But, even though I thought Flynn was right, I didn’t like him talking about her like that.

‘She’s just worried about me,’ I said.

‘Don’t defend her,’ Flynn said. ‘She’s punishing you for how you feel.’

‘No, it’s because I lied to her . . .’

‘No way. She just doesn’t like the fact that she can’t control what you do anymore, so she’s latching onto rumours she’s heard about me instead of listening to what
you
say about me.’ He paused. ‘Stupid cow.’

‘Stop it,’ I said. ‘How would you like it if I talked about your mum like that?’

‘My mum
isn’t
like that.’ He stared at me, outraged. ‘I can’t believe you can even compare . . .’

‘That’s not the point,’ I said, my voice rising along with my temper. ‘The point is that you’re only thinking about yourself. You’re just like those horrible
men at Goldbar’s, only thinking about how something affects you. Not caring what it’s like for me. Standing there, while those guys laughed at me. Just like with Mum
when—’

‘I didn’t ask you to come to Goldbar’s,’ Flynn said. ‘And it was
me
they were laughing at.’

‘They were disgusting,’ I said, wiping away the tears that pricked at my eyes.

‘They’re just guys, Riv,’ Flynn said exasperatedly. ‘They—’

‘They were total idiots. Acting like they’d never seen a girl before. Have any of them even got girlfriends?’

‘Of course,’ Flynn frowned. ‘Sure they do. They were just taking the mickey out of me. It’s what it’s like there. I—’

‘Why d’you go there then?’ My voice was coming out all broken up, the tears impossible to hold back any longer. ‘Or is it where you really belong? With the other
idiots?’

I spun on my heel and stormed off to the opposite corner of the park. I hugged my jacket around me. How could Flynn and I have been so close, inside that perfect moment, less than twenty-four
hours ago? And now like this? I wandered among the trees for a few minutes. I was so cold and so miserable. I hated fighting with Flynn. I wasn’t even sure what we were fighting about
anymore.

The wind was whipping through the trees and my tears were freezing on my face as I wandered back to the bench where I’d left Flynn. He was still sitting there, two plastic cups of tea
beside him on the bench. He looked up as I walked over.

I stared at the tea. ‘How did you know I’d be back?’

He shrugged. ‘I was going to drink yours if you didn’t show up soon.’ A small smile flickered across his face. ‘Just cos we’re going to argue, doesn’t mean we
have to freeze to death.’

I picked up one of the plastic cups. It felt warm in my cold hand. I sat down and leaned against him, all the fight seeping out of me. Flynn put his arm round me. We sat there for a while, just
sipping at the tea.

‘Why does nobody else see it?’ I murmured.

‘See what?’ I could hear the smile in his voice as he kissed my hair.

I tilted my face up to his. ‘How awesome what we have is,’ I said.

‘They’re freakin’ idiots,’ Flynn said. His eyes were all soft, dark green like the leaves above his head. He stroked my cheek. ‘I love you so much,’ he
whispered. ‘I’m sorry I shouted. I know I was rude about your mum, she’s just not giving me a chance. And you’re right about Goldbar’s. Those guys
are
stupid.
Well, most of them. But that’s just how guys are.’ He leaned closer and the whole world shrank to his eyes.

We kissed, a long, sweet, healing kiss. Then we talked again, more carefully this time. Flynn spoke calmly about what Mum had said, acknowledging my point that she was trying to protect me.

‘I know she makes all these assumptions about you,’ I admitted in turn. ‘She thought you made me lie to her about spending the night at Emmi’s.’

‘That’s ironic, isn’t it?’ Flynn said with a sigh. ‘I was actually
against
you lying.’

‘I know.’ I sighed too, leaning against his chest. It was good that Flynn and I were talking like this, but all it seemed to do was highlight the huge weight of prejudice we were up
against.

It got dark and Flynn walked me to the end of my road. We agreed we’d meet after school on Tuesday. Two days away. It felt like a lifetime to live through.

Mum was very quiet when I got back. She didn’t mention either our earlier argument or Flynn himself. She didn’t repeat her demand that I never saw him again. In fact, we hardly spoke
to each other – only about practical stuff: when she would be home late during the week and what she was cooking for supper. I expected her at least to ground me – but she didn’t
even bother to do that, though she repeated her insistence that she was not giving me any money for the foreseeable future.

I went to bed that night feeling horribly lonely.

The next day it was almost a relief to get to school. Emmi was full of how dreadful it had been with her parents. She’d been grounded for a week. But it still seemed as if she was getting
off more lightly than I was. Her parents liked Alex. And they didn’t blame him because Emmi had sneaked off to that club. They were mostly just cross with her for not telling them where she
was going. They hadn’t said anything about never seeing her boyfriend again.

‘Your mum has got a point,’ Grace said to me timidly. ‘I mean Flynn is very moody. Even James thinks so, and he’s his best friend. I can understand why your mum thinks he
might not be good for you.’

I stared at her. ‘Is that what you think?’

‘No. Of course not.’ But she blushed in a way that made me suspect she really thought the opposite.

‘It’s not that, Riv,’ Emmi said, coming to Grace’s rescue. ‘It’s just you gotta ask yourself why wherever Flynn goes you get this long line of annoyed people.
I mean, why’s he always so angry about everything?’

I didn’t know what to say to them. It was true. Flynn
was
angry a lot of the time. Certainly most of the time he was with other people. But on his own he could also be sweet and
tender and vulnerable.

Why couldn’t he be like that more often?

Why did life wind him up so much?

Why wasn’t being with me enough to make him happy?

I saw Flynn that Tuesday, then again at the weekend. I was supposed to visit Dad and Gemma at the commune on Saturday – Dad moved there to ‘get out of the rat
race’, as he put it, when he and Mum split up – but I didn’t want to go. It wasn’t that I thought Dad would rip into me like Mum had – Dad was too chilled for that. It
was more the idea of being cooped up at the commune, with nothing to do but feed the hens and hoe the vegetable patch, while Flynn and my real life went on in London.

We talked for a bit on the phone and I told Dad about my row with Mum. As usual, he was understanding. Just gave me one of his cheesy sayings about liars only hurting themselves. And he was cool
about me not coming up to the commune, too.

‘Okay, love,’ he just said. ‘I’d come to see you instead, but I can’t get away right now. Gemma’s not been well.’

Mum, naturally, rolled her eyes when I told her Dad had agreed to me not visiting the commune this weekend. Which just made me even more annoyed with her. Since the big bust-up we’d
continued to maintain an uneasy truce in the house – no rows, but hardly speaking to each other either.

The weekend passed. School on Monday was a good day. We had double English, which I liked, then drama, which I loved – and no maths. Grace, Emmi and I ate our lunch
outside in the crisp wintry sunshine. We talked about the teachers and music and shoes and didn’t mention any of our boyfriends once. It was fun.

As I left school, I wasn’t even thinking about Flynn but suddenly – as I turned the first corner – he was there in front of me.

‘Hi, Riv,’ he said, a huge smile wrinkling his eyes. ‘Thought I’d surprise you.’ He held out a small package.

‘What’s this?’ I stared at his face – the eyes hard and shining, the cheeks flushed with pleasure. I loved that face.

‘Take a look.’

I gently unfolded the tissue paper to find a delicate silver bracelet with a tiny heart dangling from the chain. ‘Oh,’ I said, overwhelmed by the feelings that welled up inside me.
‘
Oh
. . .’

Flynn looked concerned. ‘What’s the matter?’

‘Nothing.’ Tears filled my eyes. ‘It’s just so beautiful.’

‘It’s not much,’ Flynn said with a shrug. ‘But it is real silver. Riv, I know you don’t care about money and possessions but it’s exactly five months since
the day we met and the last couple of weeks have been rubbish for you and I’m trying really hard to – what was it you said? – be more open, so this is to show that I mean
it.’