Carol of the Bellskis (13 page)

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Authors: Astrid Amara

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In the garage, Seth found Carl's ice pick and snow shovel. He returned to the steps and

chipped away at the offending ice. Then he finished the porch off with a thin layer of sand. As he

worked, guests came and went, all checking on Rita. The ambulance never showed. Seth went

inside.

“Why isn't the ambulance coming?”

“I told them to cancel it,” Rita said, smiling at Seth. “I'm perfectly fine. A little bruised on

the hip, but nothing serious.”

Seth gave Mendel a critical look.

“I'm perfectly fine,” Rita insisted, laughing a little. “I told them to cancel it.”

“So you said,” Seth said. She looked like she was squinting and kept glancing up to her

bedroom.

But he couldn't force her to go to the hospital, so he dropped it, instead devoting the sunny

morning to clearing the rest of the property of patches of potential lawsuits.

The B and B didn't provide lunch for the guests, but Lars had gotten into the habit of

making the two of them something to eat every day. Seth realized how quickly he had gotten

trained to expect it as he walked inside the house at lunch and his stomach growled.

Right on schedule, Lars had two plates set at the kitchen table, each bearing an enormous

sandwich.

“How do you stay so fit if you eat like this every meal?” Seth wondered aloud. The

comment was meant as a joke, but then he realized he had never spent this much time with Lars

in the year they had been secretly dating. He had no idea what Lars ate for breakfast, lunch, and

dinner, because the two had never shared all three meals together.

Lars smiled up at him, but he was preoccupied with his laptop.

“Work?” Seth asked, sliding onto the bench and grabbing his sandwich. It was something

with portobello mushrooms and aioli sauce, and Seth openly groaned at the incredible taste.

Carol of the Bellskis

79

“No, I'm looking up signs of concussion.”

Seth frowned. “Why?”

“Rita keeps saying the same thing over and over.” Lars turned the screen to Seth, and both

of them read over a list of symptoms.

“I think she has all of these but the vomiting,” Seth said. “That's it. We're taking her in. I

don't care if she doesn't want to go.”

Seth abandoned his sandwich and found Mendel and Rita in the upstairs bathroom.

“She just threw up,” Mendel said. His eyes were wide with worry.

“I'm driving you and her to the health clinic right now,” Seth said. “Get your coats.”

It had been days since he'd driven the car, and it took effort to get the Subaru rolling in the

snow. Once on the main road, it only took five minutes to get to Whistler's health clinic. It wasn't

a large facility, but it did treat emergencies, and the staff immediately took Rita and Mendel into

one of the rooms, leaving Lars and Seth alone in the reception area.

There was no one else in the facility. Seth felt sick with worry. His negligence was to

blame for nearly killing a nice old Jewish lady. It was a good thing Jews didn't believe in hell,

otherwise there'd be a special place saved just for him.

“Stop it,” Lars said.

Seth looked over at him. “Huh?”

“Stop worrying.” Lars sat beside him. “It isn't your fault.”

“How isn't it my fault? Until Carl and Judi are found, it's my responsibility to look after

these people. I could have just shut the B and B down and sent them home, but I was under the

delusion I could just run the place as well as they did.” Seth sighed into his hands. “What a

travesty.”

Lars reached down and pinched Seth's ass.

Seth yelped and glared at him. “What was that for?”

“To make you stop thinking so hard. Rita's going to be fine. No one is going to die under

your watch, so just relax.” Lars put his arm around Seth's shoulder. “You know, I think we're

both going to need a vacation after this vacation.”

Seth laughed. “No doubt. Any ideas?”

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Astrid Amara

“Want to go somewhere New Year's?” Lars asked.

“Sure. You mean together, I assume?”

Lars looked at him drily.

“What are you thinking?” Seth asked.

“Somewhere far from ice and snow and rain. Mexico?”

Seth nodded. “I like it. Count me in.” As he sat there smiling to himself, he realized that at

some point, they weren't broken up anymore.

He was a little confused as to when exactly that had happened. Was it when they slept

together? But even then he'd considered it just a temporary peace between them.

But now he was making holiday plans. He really had given up on Lars changing, hadn't

he? Seth felt angry at himself for capitulating. But Lars squeezed him closer, in a public space no

less, and Seth understood that Lars wasn't the same man who had categorically refused to show

any affection in public. This was an improved Lars. Not exactly what he was looking for, but it

was a start.

They waited a long time. Seth left to find a restroom, and as he returned, he saw the nurse

approach Lars. Lars was standing, studying a poster about common skiing fractures.

“Excuse me. Are you Mr. Bellski's husband?”

Lars flinched in shock. His eyes grew wide. “No.”

“Oh.” The nurse blushed. “Sorry! I thought…”

“It's fine,” Seth said, entering the room and moving beside Lars. He tried not to laugh.

“He's with me.”

The nurse smiled, clearly relieved. “I can let you both see her now.”

Lars and Seth stayed only for a few minutes, exchanging a few words with Mr.

Rosenbaum, who hunched beside his wife on a rolling chair. Rita continued to smile and insist

she was fine.

“Really!” she said, laughing nervously. “All this fuss for a little bump on the head!”

“We want you healthy, Mrs. Rosenbaum.” Seth reached down and squeezed her hand. Her

skin felt like dry leather, but her grip was warm and reassuring, and she squeezed back.

“Thank you both. You are such good men,” she said, smiling at Lars.

Carol of the Bellskis

81

Lars's blush still hadn't receded from the waiting room. He said little, mumbling something

to her about getting well and then fleeing the room. Seth talked with Mr. Rosenbaum, who

decided to spend the night at the clinic instead of returning with Seth and Lars.

“You go on,” he said. “I'll be fine. We'll call a taxi tomorrow.”

“I'll come pick you up,” Seth insisted. He gave Mr. Rosenbaum his cell phone number.

“Call me. I'll see you tomorrow.” He gave Mrs. Rosenbaum one more pat and then went outside

to hunt down Lars.

He found him in the corridor, sitting on a long padded bench and staring at the wall across

from him. He didn't look angry, but he seemed preoccupied and started when Seth sat next to

him.

“You okay?” Seth asked after a moment.

“Yeah. Fine.”

They sat in silence.

“Well,” Seth finally said. “That…was awkward.”

“What? Mrs. Rosenbaum?” Lars turned, and then he quickly looked away again. “Oh. You

mean the nurse.”

“Yeah.”

Lars rested his elbows on his knees and took a long, hard look at his boots. He still didn't

say anything about the incident.

“Only in Canada,” Seth joked.

“I forgot guys can get hitched here.”

Seth nodded.

Lars turned to face him. His eyes were sharp. “How do you think she knew?”

Seth shrugged. “I don't know. Maybe she saw you grab my ass in the waiting room ten

minutes ago.”

Lars's face turned red again, but he said nothing.

Seth sighed. “I wouldn't worry. It isn't like you're emanating gaydar vibrations or anything.

I would never have guessed about you if you hadn't gotten me drunk that one night and made a

pass at me.” He smiled. “I was completely surprised by your advances. I never saw it coming.”

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Astrid Amara

“You should have,” Lars said. “I'd been checking you out for two months, ever since we

hired you.”

“You were very subtle about it, then,” Seth assured him.

“Do you want that?” Lars asked suddenly.

“What?”

“Getting hitched. A
husband
.” He made a face at the word.

Seth scowled. “What does it matter? We can't.”

“We could in Vermont.”

“Please. Have you been to Vermont? Bears and maple syrup and liberal college kids

learning how to snowboard.” Seth joked, but his heart pounded noticeably in his chest.
Thump
.

Ouch.
Thump.

“But it is something we could do there.” Lars didn't sound hopeful or dismissive.

Just…thoughtful.

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Seth said, trying to whisper to contain the anger in

his voice. “You won't even talk to me in front of your employees, and now you're proposing?”

Lars looked at his boots again. There was something in his eyes now. Something…strange.

Vulnerable. “Nah. Just talking here. I mean…I'm just curious. About whether you'd like that.”

“Of
course
I'd fucking like that.” Seth had to remember to lower his voice. “Of course I'd

like our relationship to be considered as legitimate as the one my parents have. I'd like to be able

to see you if you ever ended up in a situation like this.”

Lars's eyes narrowed. “What do you mean?”

“Don't you get it?” Seth shook his head. “If you ended up in the ICU in the US, I couldn't

sit beside you. I'm not family. I'm not a spouse. It wouldn't matter if we'd lived together for

twenty years, if we'd raised kids together or had matching fucking last names. That's a privilege

we don't have.”

Seth sat back. What kind of argument was he making here? He wanted Lars to come
out
of

the closet, not stay in it.

But that's what infuriated him, he realized. The whole injustice of it. Stemming from

people like Adam Finch, who was friends and business partners with a homosexual and still

Carol of the Bellskis

83

voted against gay marriage. He was someone who might question his opinions if Lars finally had

the balls to tell him the truth.

“I'd find a way,” Lars said quietly, as if to himself. “I'd use all my legal powers. I'll find a

way.”

Seth wasn't sure what he was talking about. He shook his head. “Come on. Let's go back.

It's almost sundown.”

Lars was quiet on the way to the car, and on the short drive to the B and B. Back in the

house, Seth gave the guests an update on Mrs. Rosenbaum's condition and let Sharon lead the

prayer and light the candles for the sixth night.

Lars spent the ceremony in the kitchen, where he whipped up dinner in record time. He

said little all night, politely answering inquiries from the other guests and offering refreshments

like a well-trained host. But he said nothing to Seth. He barely made eye contact.

But when dinner was over, the guests were in bed, and Seth and Lars returned to the

Chuppah Room, Lars quietly clasped Seth to him in a hard embrace. He didn't let go.

It got hot.

“Mmph,” Seth said against Lars's chest.

Reluctantly Lars released his grip. He bent his head, and his lips found Seth's. Seth opened

his mouth, and Lars's tongue surged inside, hot and wet and hungry. Lars's desire was silent but

strong, something powerful and needy in his embrace.

They undressed quickly and crawled under the thick covers, legs tangling, arms embracing;

Seth's cock found a nice spot between Lars's legs, and he began humping him automatically.

“Will you fuck me tonight? Please?” Lars whispered into Seth's ear. Seth stifled a groan of

excitement. He loved it when Lars begged for it. It was their old trick, the way that Lars used to

ask forgiveness. So what was Lars asking forgiveness for now?

“You have more lube?” Seth whispered back, careful not to wake any of the other guests.

Lars had brought his suitcase up the day before and now searched it to find what they

needed. He took charge, pushing Seth down on the bed and turning to face Seth's groin, then

sucking his cock as he opened the condom. He rolled it on and then slathered Seth with lube.

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Astrid Amara

Seth was distracted by the sight of Lars's bobbing cock, flushed red and full, near his face.

He pulled it into his mouth, its velvet-over-hardwood feel fitting in his mouth perfectly, like it

was meant to dock there. Lars groaned and pushed into Seth's mouth desperately. Seth braced

Lars's hips so he could manage Lars's need.

Seth relaxed his throat to take Lars in and stretched his lips around the base. He let Lars

fuck his mouth, enjoying the building pace and depth, but then Seth pulled away, moaning at his

own unfulfilled needs. Lars turned around, facing Seth, eyes slanted and dark, and he lowered

himself onto Seth's rigid cock.

Seth gripped the sheets and forced himself not to thrust up into that strong heat. He let Lars

set the pace and watched Lars use his thighs to lift up and slide down Seth's cock to undulate his

powerful body above of him and ride him with a look of tense joy.

Seth gripped Lars's hips and pushed upward. God, this was shattering, this feeling. He

smoothed out their rhythm, found a pattern, call and respond, and watched Lars's heavy cock

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