Carry the Light (24 page)

“Sixty-one.”

“Then it's long past time you learned. Why don't you get those bikes and bring them closer to the house while Charlene and I go inside and get that snack you wanted ready,” she suggested, and took Charlene's arm again. “What kind of cake did you say you made?”

Charlene caught her husband's gaze and smiled. She was no longer certain whether they were taking care of Aunt Dorothy or whether she was taking care of them, but, in the end, it didn't really matter. Right now, the three of them were taking take care of one another.

And whether she and Daniel rode together, as Aunt Dorothy hoped, or not, as long as they prayed together, their love and their marriage would only get stronger and stronger.

R
etiring from teaching turned out to be easy.

Four days after Easter, Ellie met with her supervisor at his home to tell him about her future plans. The following day, a Friday, while school was still officially closed for spring break, Ellie left the principal's office shortly after noon, immediately following their brief but poignant meeting.

She did not have to return to either her office or her classroom. She had emptied her personal files and removed her personal belongings earlier that morning and had stored them in the trunk of her car. Everything else she had left for her successor, the young substitute teacher who had so capably taken over Ellie's class schedule during her recent absences.

With her mind untroubled and her heart content, she walked out of the school. She was confident she had made the right decision to retire, both for herself and for her students, because it felt right and it felt good. She had touched many lives over the course of her career, and she, in turn, had been touched by her students and their families. Not every memory was a good one, but each memory was precious, and she was grateful to be taking them with her as she crossed the staff parking lot for the last time.

The sun was exceptionally warm today. If she had not been on her way to pick up her mother from Havenwood Care Center, she would have put down the top on her convertible in a heartbeat.

Instead, she opened all four of the windows, took one final glance at the building where she had spent all of her professional life and pulled away. Filled with a sense of freedom and relief, she embraced her new identity as a daughter—a good and loving daughter.

She drove across the avenue and through the side streets until she reached the river, where she turned to follow the winding road to Havenwood. She passed the large wooden cross that had been erected for sunrise service last Sunday. She had attended Easter services at the care center with her mother this year, but seeing the cross in the park reaffirmed her belief that He would guide her through the bittersweet weeks—perhaps months—ahead with her mother, as well as whatever future she might create for herself when she was once again alone.

Although she had talked to her mother about nearly everything else, she had not shared her decision to retire with her yet. The process of retirement had actually been complicated by the emergency leave she had taken in order to care for her mother for the remainder of the school year, but the result was the same.

For whatever time her mother had left, Ellie intended to be with her every moment, and she planned on revealing that today after they got home.

When she walked into the lobby at Havenwood, she was surprised to see that the receptionist was not at her desk, but her mother was sitting in one of the chairs close to the fireplace. She was even more surprised when her mother stood up, clad in a pair of soft gray slacks and a pale lemon sweater set. Her coat and purse were lying on the chair beside her.

“Do you like my new look?” her mother asked.

“Do you?” Ellie replied.

“If I'd known how comfortable I'd be wearing slacks, I wouldn't have waited all these years to try them,” her mother replied.

“Where did you get them?” Ellie asked, wondering what her mother had done with the dress Ellie had brought yesterday for her to wear home.

“Phyllis brought this outfit in this morning. She took the other one home with her,” she explained, and looked down at her feet. “The oxfords might not look that swell, but they're comfortable, and you don't notice them so much if I'm wearing slacks. My physical therapist said they'd do just as nicely as sneakers, which is just as well. I'm not ready to wear those yet.”

“You look terrific,” Ellie offered, and she meant it. Although her mother was still a little pale and had lost weight, her color was good and her eyes were bright and clear.

“Thank you. I'm feeling pretty spiffy, although by the time I walk to the car, I'll probably need a nap to recover. Not that I'm complaining. I'm pleased as I can be to be able to walk out of here.”

“Me, too,” Ellie murmured. “Can we just leave or do I have to sign you out?”

Her mother picked up her coat and purse. “All done, and I've got all the papers in my purse, along with some new prescriptions. All you have to do is go back to the nurses' station to let someone know I'm leaving.”

“I'll be right back,” Ellie promised.

She returned to the lobby less that five minutes later. “We're all set. I'm parked right in front. Would you like me to bring the car closer to the entrance doors so you don't have to walk so far?”

“I'll manage. Walking is good therapy. Besides, you're right here.”

“That I am,” Ellie said.

They looped arms, and Ellie patted her mother's hand. Outside, her mother stopped for a moment, raised her face to the sun and smiled. “I had an idea it would be warm. I'm glad I don't need my coat,” she said, but frowned when they resumed walking and approached Ellie's car. “Why isn't your top down on your car?”

Ellie's eyes widened. “You want the top down?”

“Absolutely,” her mother said quickly. “Don't you?”

“Sure, but you always said that it was too dangerous to ride in a convertible with the top down.”

“Well, I've changed my mind. Put the top down, Ellie,” she insisted, “and stop looking at me like I've had a brain transplant. I've got a bum heart. That's all. I survived my second heart attack, but the next one will probably be my last, which means I don't have all that much time left to do all the things I've always wanted to do before I die.”

“Fair enough,” Ellie replied, and got into the car. Once she'd put the top down, she got out again to help her mother into the passenger seat. Back in the driver's seat, she noticed that her mother had taken a piece of paper out of her purse and was crossing something off. “What's that?”

“My wish list,” her mother replied, holding it up and waving it in the air.

“You actually made a list?” Ellie asked, a bit unnerved by the idea of it, and that it appeared quite long.

“One of the social workers helped me.” She slipped the list back into her purse.

While Ellie backed out of the parking space, her mother laid her head back, closed her eyes and tilted her face to the sun again. “Riding in a convertible with the top down was number five on my list. Wearing slacks was number eleven.”

Ellie chuckled. “How many wishes are there on that list of yours?”

Her mother laughed. “Probably too many. Why?”

“Just curious,” Ellie replied. “Is there anything else we can do on the way home?”

Her mother sat up straight and turned toward her. “There's one thing, but I don't want to take up any more of your day than I already have. With all the time you've spent with me this week, I'm sure you have errands of your own you need to do. Or papers to grade.”

Ellie kept her gaze focused on the road, but cleared her throat. “Actually, I was going to talk to you about that when we got home. I stopped at school on my way to picking you up,” she said, and slowed down for a stop sign.

“But school's closed,” her mother argued. “Never mind. I forgot. You have a master key.”

Ellie glanced at her mother. “Not anymore. I turned in all my keys today, along with my retirement letter.”

Her mother looked away for a moment before she stared down at her lap. “You didn't have to retire just to take care of me.”

Ellie checked her rearview mirror, saw that there was no other car behind her for several blocks and reached over to take her mother's hand. “I didn't retire for you. I retired for us and for me. There's a whole list of things I want to do with you, too, you know. Maybe I haven't written them down like you have, but that doesn't mean I haven't thought of things we should do together or things that I'd like to do for myself, for that matter.”

“Name one,” her mother said, lifting a brow.

Ellie checked her rearview mirror again, saw another car approaching and looked both ways before accelerating. “Okay, I will. I want to go parasailing this summer when I go to South Carolina to visit Alex and my grandsons.”

“Parasailing?”

“You know, you suit up in a harness and there's this parachute type thing that lifts you up into the air when the motorboat pulls you through the ocean.”

“You're not serious! You could get killed,” her mother exclaimed.

“That's right. Or I could have the time of my life.”

“True,” her mother admitted. “Is everything on your list so dangerous?”

“Not at all. I want to get more active at church, for one thing.”

“What's on your list for us to do together?” her mother asked.

Ellie looked into her rearview mirror, met her mother's gaze and smiled. “That's easy. Anything you want to do with me.”

“Anything?”

“Anything,” Ellie replied.

“Then take me home to my house. We won't stay long,” she promised.

Fifteen minutes later, Ellie pulled up in front of her mother's house and turned off the ignition. “Do you want to tell me what we're doing here?”

Her mother shook her head. “Not yet. Let's go inside.”

Eager to find out what was coming, Ellie helped her mother out of the car and held on to her as they walked up the sidewalk. When she stepped inside, she bent down to remove her shoes, but stopped instantly, amazed to see that her mother was walking right across the living room carpet…wearing her shoes.

“Mother! Your shoes!”

Her mother glanced down at her feet for a moment. “Oh, dear, I'm wearing shoes and I'm walking across my carpet. Imagine that,” she said, looking at Ellie and grinning. “I can't tell you how many times I wanted to walk around this house in my shoes instead of acting like a fussbudget all the time. Come on. Join me. It's about time we had a little bit of fun here in this house, although if any of the neighbors could see us getting all excited about wearing our shoes indoors, they might send us both away for a while.”

“You're serious.”

“Absolutely. This is wish number sixteen—I want to walk around my own house without taking my shoes off. I could show you the list if you don't believe me.”

“No, I—I believe you.”

“Good. Then you can help me take care of another wish, too.”

Ellie chuckled as she walked across the carpet toward her mother. “I'm almost afraid to ask what that is.”

“Lights, Ellie. I want to turn on every light in this house! And I want you to help me.”

“Why? So you can yell at me again for wasting electricity, just for old times' sake?” Ellie asked, wondering if this wish business wasn't getting out of hand.

“No,” her mother argued. “I want you to turn on as many lights as you want and leave them on, just once, without hearing me yell at you.”

“But why?” Ellie asked, wondering if there weren't other, more important issues from their past that needed mending.

“Because I can't change how you grew up, and I can't change the fact that I was so hard on you,” her mother whispered. “After I'm gone, when you're working in this house clearing out my things before you put it up for sale, I don't want you to hear echoes of me yelling at you all the time. I want you to remember being with me today and laughing and being silly together.”

“How silly?” Ellie teased, if only to keep tears at bay.

“This isn't silly enough for you?”

“Not unless we sing while we walk around with our shoes on and turn on the lights,” Ellie insisted, and looped her arm with her mother's. And so they began, walking slowly around the house, going from room to room, singing their hearts out as they turned on the lights together, chasing away the hurtful memories of the past and creating new ones, strengthened by the most important light of all—the light of faith they each carried in their hearts.

A
s the other mourners milled about in small groups near the cars lined up in the cemetery, Charlene stood at the grave site at the head of the coffin, while Daniel made arrangements for all of Aunt Dorothy's friends to be taken back to the house for light refreshments.

It was late September, but the sun was shining as brightly and warmly as it had all summer. While Charlene was filled with gratitude for all the love and wisdom that Aunt Dorothy had shared with her over the past six months, and for the love of her husband, it was knowing that Aunt Dorothy was now safe in the arms of her Creator, sharing in the glories of eternal life, that warmed her heart most of all.

She glanced at the elephant pin she had added to the flowers on top of the coffin, down at the pin that she wore, and smiled. Shortly before her death, Aunt Dorothy had insisted that Charlene keep the candy tin filled with memories and jewelry. Rather than storing them away to collect dust, Charlene had gotten Aunt Dorothy's permission to take the three engagement rings and Aunt Dorothy's birthstone ring to the jeweler.

Using the stones from all the rings, as well as the diamond from Charlene's mother's engagement ring, the jeweler had fashioned a lovely pin of four diamonds clustered around the amethyst stone. Charlene had worn the pin for the first time on her aunt's birthday ten days ago. She wore it again today to honor the generations of strong women in her family, but most especially for her Aunt Dorothy, a woman who had lived life with humor, grace and faith.

“Thank you,” she whispered, knowing how hard it was going to be to go back home where her aunt would not be waiting for her.

When she turned to leave, Ellie suddenly appeared and put her arm around Charlene. “I'm sorry I missed the funeral. My plane got delayed,” she managed, pausing to catch her breath.

Charlene smiled and hugged her friend. “It's all right. I really didn't expect you to come all the way back for Aunt Dorothy's funeral. Especially with your mother passing so recently. You should have stayed in South Carolina, visiting with Alex,” she said as they started walking to join the other mourners.

“Actually, I left there last week to spend some time in Dallas with Richard, but I wanted to come,” she replied. “You cut your hair! Is that a perm, too?”

Charlene ran her fingers through her hair. “Actually, once I had it cut, the waves appeared. Go figure. All these years, I had naturally curly hair and didn't know it.”

“Well, you look terrific, but how are you feeling?” Ellie asked.

“Empty. Drained. But blessed. Truly blessed to have had the time we did with Aunt Dorothy.”

“She was quite a lady, wasn't she?”

“That she was,” Charlene said. “I'm going to miss her a lot.”

“I know,” Ellie murmured. “I miss my mother, too, but I'm really grateful that we had a chance to spend some time together before she passed. How long are you and Daniel going to stay here in Welleswood before moving back home again?”

“Why?” Charlene teased. “Now that you're retired and traveling back and forth to visit your sons all the time, I wouldn't think you'd be spending that much time here.”

“Oh, yes, I will. To tell you the truth, the more I travel, the more I want to be in Welleswood. My best friend has a store here, you know, and I have lots of plans for us. Of course, it would be easier if she didn't live so far away and have to spend so much time commuting, but—”

“This best friend needs her best friend, too,” Charlene said. “Actually, while you've been away, Daniel and I decided we both wanted to live here, and Aunt Dorothy was very excited and very pleased that we wanted to keep her house. Right after Daniel put in his retirement papers last month, one of the commissioners here asked him if he was interested in being head groundskeeper at Welles Park.”

“He did?”

“It's not official yet, but Daniel should be approved for the post at the next commissioners' meeting.”

“But I thought you said he liked living in the country,” Ellie queried.

Charlene gave her friend another hug. “He did, but he likes living here even better. So do I,” she murmured. “So do I.”