Chance Encounters (20 page)

He shrugged his shoulders. “I thought proposing would solve everything and make whatever it was that was wrong…
right
. I thought it would instantly make you happy again.”

Caroline refused to let Clay shoulder any blame. “But I should have talked to you. I should have told you what was going on with me. I should have been honest, but I was too busy trying to fight off everything I was feeling. I tried to pretend that I was okay, when I wasn’t.”

“But I knew you weren’t okay. And I didn’t even try to talk to you about it. In all honesty, you were the last person I ever worried about losing or falling apart. I feel like I took you for granted.” His head shook.

“You’d never had a reason to worry before. This thing with Jackson…it was beyond any of our control. I know it sounds stupid, but it was never about you and me. I knew how much you loved me, Clay, and I never felt taken for granted.” She longed for her truth to comfort him.

“Thank you,” Clay responded, his mouth unsmiling and his gaze sincere.

“I mean it. I really am sorry.” The pain she caused still burdened her.

“I know you are.” Clay shifted his weight. “Look, Care, I used to want to make you hurt just as badly as I did. But now that feels like a long time ago. I don’t want you to be upset any more. I really am okay. And I want you to be, too.”

She was happily surprised when he leaned in to hug her. Her body warmed in his familiar arms as she spoke gently in his ear. “Thank you so much. I wish you the best in everything. You truly deserve it.”

Clay smiled and as Caroline started to walk away, she heard him call her name. Her stomach dipped as she turned to face him. “I forgive you.” He looked at his feet and then back up into her eyes. “I think I understand why you did what you did.”

It was as if an SUV lifted off of her shoulders and the blame she carried shattered to the ground at her feet. She almost fell to the sidewalk in relief, but braced herself against a cement parking meter. “Thank you, Clay,” she answered through her tears as she watched him continue down the street with Gina at his side.

Her body felt light and each breath filled her with relief. She hadn’t realized the extent of the guilt she had been carrying until it fell free from her. She had lived with it for so long that it had become a part of her. In hoping that her words could help him heal, he had just given her the ultimate gift…the gift of forgiveness.

Chapter Nineteen

When Jackson first opened his eyes, all he could make out were blurry shapes and patches of light and dark. The shapes slowly turned into blurry images and he could distinguish the faces of his parents…then Sally, Tommy, and Alex. He tried to smile, but his mouth felt like he had just left the dentist’s office.

****

Alex and Tommy stood in the back of the room as Jackson’s parents were briefed; Sally hovered nearby. The doctor was encouraging as she spoke to his parents. “Jackson is responding more quickly than we expected after reducing his medication. It will be a few days before we can determine the extent of the damage, though.” She went on, “Jackson will need extensive physical therapy to regain basic motor functions. There is the possibility of speech therapy, as well.”

Alex high-fived Sally and Tommy at the news and congratulations were exchanged all around. Jackson’s friends didn’t know what the future held for him, but one thing was certain—he would get to have one.

****

Caroline received a call at work with the good news. “Hey, Caroline, it’s Alex!”

At first, her heart stopped when she saw Alex’s name on her caller ID, but the tone of his voice immediately erased any concerns she had about the call bearing bad news. “Hi! What’s up? How are you?”

“I’m great! I just wanted you to know that he opened his eyes.”

Caroline’s grin stretched from ear to ear. “Really? When?”

“About ten minutes ago.”

“Oh my gosh, that’s awesome!” she exclaimed. “That
is
awesome…right?” she asked.

Alex laughed and then explained. “It’s definitely awesome. But, he can’t talk yet and the doctors aren’t sure when his speech will come back, or to what extent. I just wanted you to know that he’s awake.”

“Thank you so much, Alex. I really appreciate the updates.”

“Of course. I’ll call you if anything else happens, okay?” he said.

“Okay,” Caroline said one last time before she hung up. Her hopes high, she figured it was only a matter of time before her phone would ring with Jackson’s voice on the other end.

She turned towards Bailey’s cubicle and beamed in her direction. “He’s awake!” she shouted in a loud whisper.

Bailey looked up from her work and squealed. “Really? How do you know? Did he call?”

“One sec.” Caroline held up a finger, then she thumbed Tracey a text message with the news. Tracey responded right back telling her “
Great news!
” and asked when she was “
Coming back out?
”

Caroline turned back to Bailey. “Alex called. He said that Jackson couldn’t talk yet, but his eyes were open.”

“That’s great news, Care. Let’s go out and celebrate tonight!”

“Sounds great.” Caroline could use some fun in her life. She had been all but consumed in thoughts of Jackson for what felt like forever. And she’d been doing a lot of waiting—waiting for Jackson to wake up, waiting for him to call, and waiting for her life to begin again.

The girls headed straight to a restaurant and bar after work. Caroline was still on cloud nine from Alex’s call that afternoon. They sat in a small booth and Caroline ordered appetizers and a light beer.

“So, how long until Jackson calls, you think?” Bailey asked.

“I don’t know. I mean, Alex said he couldn’t talk yet. But…” Caroline’s voice trailed off.

“But what?” Bailey rolled her eyes. “Oh, don’t
even
, Caroline.”

“Don’t even what?”

“You think he’s not gonna call. I can’t believe I’m best friends with an idiot.”

Caroline shook her head with a laugh. “No. I think it’s idiotic to
assume
he will.”

Bailey slapped the table and Caroline grabbed her drink before it toppled over. “Ugh. Really? Of course he’s going to call. He loves you. Even Alex said so!”

“Alex also thought Jackson’s parents knew who I was. So, he could be wrong.”

Bailey shrugged; Caroline was right about that. Alex had been just as surprised as Caroline when they realized that Jackson’s parents didn’t know who she was. “I still think he’ll call,” Bailey said with optimism.

Caroline smiled. “I hope so.”

“There’s no way this all happened for nothing. All the drama, the heartache, leaving Clay…”

“You better be right,” Caroline said.

“Dur. Of course I’m right. I’m smart, remember?” Bailey laughed, and held up her glass.

Chapter Twenty

The days seemed to pass in slow motion as Caroline waited for the call that never came. She attempted to fill the agony of waiting during the day with work and let Bailey drag her out at night.

She sat at her desk trying to concentrate on the ad mock-up that was due before the end of the day, but Jackson consumed her every thought. Caroline wanted to believe that he would call soon, but worried his silence meant what she had feared the most…that Jackson had really moved on and was no longer in love with her.

Caroline silently berated herself for the hundredth time for waiting so long to walk away from Clay. She had finally admitted what she had felt since that first day, but it was apparently too late and she had no one to blame but herself. She had waited too long…treated him badly…abused his heart. She snapped her laptop shut in frustration, picked up her cell phone and checked to make sure she still had a signal. She did.

Bailey walked by her desk quickly without stopping. “Anything yet?”

Caroline simply shook her head and Bailey mouthed,
“I’m sorry
” as she continued on to the conference room.

****

Jackson laughed in his hospital bed as Sally told him about a funny incident at the bar. Alex leaned in the doorway and watched Sally’s interaction with Jackson. He had tried to be patient, wanting to ask his best friend about Caroline, but once again it seemed like a bad time. Sally was always in Jackson’s room whenever Alex dropped in, and he didn’t want to hurt her feelings.

When Jackson first awoke, he couldn’t speak clearly and had been in intense physical and speech therapy ever since. Sally made a point to be at the hospital as much as possible, and Alex knew that her support had been good for Jackson.

Jackson joked with Sally like old times, and Alex smiled in relief at the improvement he noticed. His friend was more and more like his old self every day. Maybe there was no time like the present.

“So…” Alex ventured. “How are things with Caroline?” Sally stiffened and leaned back slightly.

Jackson’s brows furrowed and he dropped Sally’s hand. “What do you mean?”

“Haven’t you talked to her?” Alex asked pointedly.

“No. Why would I?”

“She was here, you know.” Alex glanced at Sally. “You
did
know she was here, right?”

Jackson started fidgeting in his bed. “No, I didn’t. How would I know that if no one told me? When was she here?”

“When you first got into the accident…she came to the hospital.”

“She came here? She flew…out here?” Jackson’s face froze and his eyes were unfocused as he obviously struggled to understand.

“Yeah, I thought you knew that.” Alex shrugged.

“How the hell would I know that?” Jackson shouted, his color rising as his temper flared.

“Because she left you a letter!” Alex retorted.

“What letter?” he asked in disbelief..

Alex looked in Sally’s direction. “Sal, you never gave him the letter?”

****

An agitated heat swirled throughout Jackson’s body. None of this made sense…could Caroline have really come to the hospital? He didn’t remember any of it. He frowned at Sally, whose face had turned pale. Slowly, she picked up her purse and pulled out the tattered envelope that had “
Jackson
” written on the front in blue ink.

“I’m sorry. I should have given this to you weeks ago.” Her hands quivered as she handed Jackson the envelope.

“You’ve had a letter from Caroline this whole time?” Jackson asked, his voice dangerously soft. “You kept it from me?”

“I’m so sorry, Jackson. I was supposed to give it to you when you woke up, but I panicked.” Sally shifted in her chair and pulled her purse closer to her body. She glanced up at Alex for support, but he looked away.

“You panicked? You knew how I felt about her.” Jackson struggled to keep his temper in check as his voice rose and his face flushed with color.

Sally stuttered, her voice shaking. “It just happened so fast after you woke up. For the first time, you actually needed me. And I didn’t want to lose that…I didn’t want to lose you.” She reached out to touch his arm, but drew back as he stiffened.