Chapter Twenty-five
F
all was coming. September was fast approaching and the tall poplars’ coin-like leaves were just beginning to turn yellow among the dark stands of spruce. It was still warm enough, however, to make it worth claiming a hammock in the late afternoon sun. It made Kenzie feel marginally better to be outside, but after nearly a month on the Macleod farm, both her human and her wolfen selves ached for Josh on every level.
No one talks about the downside of having a mate—that being apart sucks. Big time.
She wondered if Josh felt as desolate as she did. And would it be better or worse for him once he was Changeling?
James’s children, Hailey and Hunter, had taken Anya along to feed some of the livestock. The little girl still had sad moments and sometimes tears, but with the resilience of a child, Anya had gradually been able to take an interest in her new surroundings. The process was no doubt helped along by Connor giving her a puppy of her very own, something she could hold and hug whenever she needed it, especially at night. With the dog to encourage her, the little girl was running and playing again. She wf hould never forget her mother, but there was no doubt that Anya would heal.
Kenzie had managed to get some college students to take over her dig north of Chistochina, and she’d also sent some students to three other sites in the Copper River region. Plus she’d laid plans to make two digs herself in Alberta. One would be very close to home, east of Dunvegan, where a member of the Pack had spotted what looked like a petroglyph on a rock face. The other dig would be further north in the Caribou Mountains that surrounded a strange inland plateau. Both digs would have to wait for another summer of course. Snow came early to the Peace River country.
Kenzie’s winter project would be compiling her private research into a manuscript on the shared origins of humans and Changelings. The secret of shapeshifter existence might be spilled sooner than anyone wanted, but Kenzie would have a book ready for a publisher the minute it happened. Connor’s wife, Zoey, had also talked her into being prepared to do TV talk shows and magazine interviews. Kenzie was far more comfortable with college lecture tours and scholarly papers, but Zoey made her see that the people she needed to reach were not scientists, but the average human on the street. She sighed and tried not to think about it. Right now, she just wanted to lie in the hammock and zone out—
A shadow fell across her and she looked up to see James blocking her sun. “Hey!”
He adjusted his stance so she was once again bathed in sunshine. “Got a minute?” he asked.
“Sure. Several, in fact. What’s up?”
In answer, he reached out a hand and deftly dumped her out of the hammock.
“What the hell was
that
for?” She sat up and brushed bits of dried grass off herself, eyeing her brother as if he’d lost his mind. Culley would be the one to pull a stunt like that, not James.
“I figured it’d be kinder than the smack upside the head that I’d prefer to give you.”
She stared.
“You’ve been moping around this farm for almost a month now. It’s pretty damn obvious that you’re pining for Josh. Why aren’t you two together?”
“I am
not
pining.” Come to think of it, maybe she was. “And Josh has been busy.”
“I know he went to Telegraph Creek, but he didn’t stay there.”
“No, he had to wrap things up in Glennallen. He has some years in at Fish and Game and he can’t just walk away without—”
“The full moon is tonight, sis.”
There it was. For those who had been bitten, the first Change always occurred at the next full moon. It was a special and sacred occasion in her world, and Kenzie had hoped Josh would want to be with her when it happened. He hadn’t said a word. In fact, it had been almost two weeks since she’d last heard from him when flowers arrived at the farm addressed to her. “I know. I guess he decided to make his first shift in Alaska, probably with Stanton.”
James sat beside her on the ground. “Do you love him?”
“Hey, why all the questions all of a sudden?”
“I want to see you happy. I know the family gets on your case all the time about settling down, and I’ve tried to stay out of it. But I need to tell you something. All those years ago, when you were little, and Culley and I found you in that pit ... we thought we’d rescued you, but I swear part of you never left that hole in the ground.”
“What arean and you talking about?”
“I know a little bit about being alone. And I know a lot about closing yourself off—I ran as a wolf for three damn decades, remember? I didn’t want any more pain, any emotional risk, but I had to learn that I wasn’t alive without it.
“You’ve lived all this time in fear, done everything you can to keep humans at arm’s length, even though you walk among them all the time. I’m concerned that you’re letting fear dictate your love life too. Josh is a good man.
Better
than good. And I think maybe you need him.”
She sighed. “Yeah, I think I do too. I’m just waiting for him to—”
“Decide to join your world? Sounds like you’re putting conditions on your relationship.
I’ll be with you as long as you agree to be like me
.”
“I am not.” Was she?
“You already know how he feels about you, and what he risked to get you out of that facility. You know he could have been killed. Have you thought about what he’s willing to sacrifice to be with you now?” James counted off his fingers. “His career, his house, his friends, his—”
“Not his career, not really. Jillian wants him to oversee the wildlife center, and—oh hell, it’s
still
a big move. I’ve already been feeling guilty about all of it. Is that what you wanted?”
“No. I just want you to answer one question. You don’t have to tell me, but for God’s sake, answer it for yourself:
What are
you
willing to give up in order to be with him
?”
The Changelings were welcomed by the Tahltan, as Josh knew they would be. The ancient friendship had not been forgotten. Shaggy Sam and Dan turned out to be gifted mechanics, especially with ATVs and outboards—critical equipment in the remote area—and decided to stay in Telegraph Creek to ply their trade. Roy was better with horses than machines, and signed on with a Tahltan outfitter who guided hunts into Kawdy Mountain. The others melted away into the vast territory beyond the town. Josh didn’t know where they would end up, only that IBC would never find them again. Their friends would, however—the seven intended to meet up to run as a pack under the full moon.
As for himself, Josh felt like a child again as he knocked on his Gramma Kishegwet’s door. She was a tiny woman, and he’d been taller than she since he was ten, but she felt like a china doll in his arms as he hugged her. Her personality was anything but small, however.
“Where the heck have you been, boy? I haven’t seen you since forever.” A plate of cold sliced moose tongue and thick bread was set in front of him.
“Meduh,” he said.
Thank you
.“Now, Gramma, I was here at Christmas to visit you.”
She pointed the mayonnaise knife at him. “And what month is it now?”
“April, isn’t it?” he teased.
“You always had a smart mouth.” She chuckled and shook her head. “I missed it; it’s good you came. You’ve got something different about you now though.” Her bright eyes scrutinized him and he nearly squirmed. He knew that look, knew that she always saw far more than the physical. “A wolf spirit walks with you. Got bitten, did ya? One of these boys you brought here?”
“No, it was another shapeshifter, a bad one, and he’s dead now.”
“By your hand?”
He nodded and so did she, apparently satisfied with that answer.
“Now tell me about this
wolf woman
I been dreaming about.”
Josh laughed out loud—there was no hiding anything from his gramma’s inner sight. So he told her about Kenzie. Gramma Kishegwet was unusually quiet, sitting with her hands folded around her teacup as he talked, and when he finished, she got up and left the room.
Just as he was wondering if he had upset her somehow, the old woman returned with a carved wooden box the size of a paperback book. He’d seen it in a place of honor since he was very small. “This is for your wolf woman, boy,” she said, and set the box in front of him. “It’s waited a long time.”
Josh hugged her and kissed her cheek. His throat was tight as he stammered out, “Meduh, Gramma.”
The sun rose as he flew through the Stikine River valley, heading back to Alaska. Josh had decided to leave the helicopter at the Chistochina airstrip where IBC would be able to reclaim it—after he wiped all his prints off, of course. For now he just enjoyed the trip. It always felt good to be in the air again.
Warm light brushed the hilltops, glittered in the water. Suddenly Josh realized he wasn’t alone. A pair of golden eagles flanked the chopper, their seven-foot wingspans gleaming in the morning sun.
Josh had to remind himself to focus on his flight panel. He settled for stealing regular glances at the great birds. Goldens were beautiful and rare, but they were also powerful spirit animals and often signified
new beginnings
. He fervently hoped so. He’d made his decision and was standing by it, and hoped with all his heart that Kenzie would understand.
Kenzie knew the very moment Josh arrived at the farm. Her inner wolf woke her from a restless sleep and she sat upright in the darkness, shivering with anticipation. Skipping the underwear, she quickly pulled on a pair of jeans and a hoodie, and ran outside in bare feet. The waning moon hid behind midnight clouds but her Changeling vision guided her along the path without hesitation, through the woods, alongside the corrals and the barns. Finally, she spotted the truck in the laneway.
Josh was standing in the middle of the open yard, studying Connor’s house. There were no lights on at this time of night and he was no doubt wondering where to start looking for her. Silently she ran across the grass, coming up behind him undetected. He remained unaware of her until she quietly whispered “
Boo.
”
Instantly she was in his arms, his hands running over her body, his mouth on hers. A wildness rose in both of them, a frantic desperation as if they’d spent years apart instead of weeks. He came up for air long enough to ask “Where?” and she knew what he was asking. Knew, too, that they’d never make it all the way back to her cabin. Instead, she grabbed his hand and led him to the closest barn. It was a vintage building, used to store feed for the horses, and she ran lightly up the sloping ladder to the loft. The sweet smell of fresh alfalfa permeated the cool night air and slivers of moonlight sliced across the darkness through gaps in the planked walls. James had a favorite napping spot carved out in a corner where some broken bales beneath an old quilt made what he called
the best bed in the world
.
At the moment, neither Josh nor Kenzie could care if it was a bed of nails. In seconds, he had stripped the hoodie and the jeans from her and she helped him shuck his own shueitclothes. That first breathless meeting of skin against skin, as her nipples pressed against his hard muscled chest and their thighs entwined, was both primal and profound. The wolf within her leapt for joy and she threw her head back in purest bliss as body and soul sang out that she was home at last.
Josh took advantage of her exposed throat with teeth and lips and tongue until shivers of pleasure radiated outward, tightening her breasts and electrifying her nipples. He seized her hands and placed them behind his neck before cupping her ass in his palms. She barely had time to wrap her legs around him before he hefted her high against the smooth wooden wall. She’d admired the corded muscles of his arms before, but still his strength surprised and thrilled her. Her heart beat faster as he both balanced her and pinned her in place, and she was wet for him long before his fingers slid into her.
He worked her mercilessly, thumbing her clit as he stroked the subtle secret spot just inside her folds. She gasped and writhed, caught between wanting to escape the unbearable intensity and wanting more of it. He fastened his mouth on her breast, sucking it hard in time with the plunge and stroke of his fingers in her heat. Her own fingers dug into his shoulders but not out of fear of falling. Instead, she was clutching for an anchor as his touch had her dizzily spiraling up and up to impossible heights of sensation. Up and up, higher and higher. She had a fleeting impression of a roller coaster car ratcheting its way slowly but unrelentingly to the edge of what surely must be a cliff....
Without warning, Josh took them both down to the quilt. The momentary absence of his fingers created such a chasm of pure
need
in her that she twisted in his arms and desperately ground her bottom into his groin. She could feel his cock, hard and hot, pressed against her ass and she was nearly wild with want. Still he held her, running his hands down her arms, pressing her palms to the quilt as he shadowed her kneeling form with his own body. She shivered as he drew back, his fingers trailing over her arched back then kneading her taut cheeks. His knees nudged her legs further apart and he slipped a hand between them, delivering lush broad strokes from clit to tailbone. There was no slow ride to the brink this time, no easy climb, just a straight rush skyward to teeter helplessly on the very edge of the world.