Chicken Soup for the Canadian Soul (26 page)

Although it was Christmas Eve, on a whim Brad called the adoption agency in a small town two hours away. A recorded message announced a general information meeting on December 27. They figured it would be like all the other meetings—reams of forms to fill out and process before they would even be considered. But they changed their plans and fit in a trip to attend the meeting.

The couple that owned the agency had just returned from Costa Rica and had personally photographed the children Brad and Nancy wanted to adopt.

“Yes, those children are still available. Do you want them?” inquired the agent.

Nancy and Brad were totally stunned! It was all happening so fast! Brad said, “Yes! Let’s go for it!”

Nancy was a little frightened. Three children all at once! Could she do it? But the story of how the mother’s circumstances had changed, and how she had had to give up her babies broke Nancy’s heart. She and Brad decided that between them they had enough love to share with these abandoned children. Before they left that day, agreements were signed, a lawyer was contacted and the financial commitment was made. Nancy joked that it took longer to decide on their new car! But they were sure and made immediate plans to go to Costa Rica to meet their kids!

Excitement and anxiety began to build. Would they all like each other? How would six-year-old Maria react to her new mother? How would three-year-old Katrine react to the tall man with the yellow beard and blue eyes? Would tiny one-year-old Emilio find comfort in a new set of arms? How would they all communicate? Brad and Nancy enrolled in Spanish lessons right away.

A host of concerns from well-meaning friends and family followed their impulsive decision. But, undeterred and with love filling their hearts, they moved steadily forward toward their goal.

In February, Brad and Nancy travelled to Costa Rica. They had just settled into their hotel room when there was a knock on the door, and the three children entered to meet their new mama and papa. Baby Emilio was carried by the foster mother, and along for the ride was the Costa Rican lawyer, a doctor, a translator and the director of the Canadian adoption agency who just happened to be in Costa Rica! Here was an entire team committed to successfully bringing this family together. Another miracle!

At first shy, the naturally happy and trusting children were soon giggling, laughing and chasing each other around. Baby Emilio, thin and tiny for his age, quickly attached himself to Brad. To their surprise and great pleasure, it did not take long for the two girls to connect with Nancy. Soon, they heard themselves addressed for the very first time as “Mama” and “Papa.” Overwhelmed, Brad and Nancy’s eyes filled with tears. This was their family. There was no going back now.

They were told it would take another four months for the paperwork to navigate both the Canadian and Costa Rican bureaucracies, but if all went well, they’d be able to return in June for their children. Nancy and Brad left with reluctance— Who knew how long it would really take? Either government might decide to block the adoption for some reason. Or the birth mother, when confronted with signing the papers, might reconsider.

Weeks passed. Brad and Nancy reorganized the house, bought clothing and assembled backyard toys. Months passed. Their Spanish improved and a school was chosen. Finally, it was June. The adoption had made it through the Canadian bureaucracy, but was now stuck in some department in Costa Rica. Then it was mid-July. Dubious friends and relatives suggested it might be several months more. But waiting for months was not part of their vision. Anxious and eager for their new life to start, the couple made a quick decision. They wanted their kids!

With great urgency, Brad booked two round-trip tickets to Costa Rica and three one-way tickets back to Canada. They were determined to return in ten days with their children. Brad told the Canadian agent of their plans, and the agent informed the Costa Rican team that they were coming for their kids and would not consider returning to Canada without them. The couple flew to Costa Rica, and everyone at home held their breath.

The three children had an ecstatic reunion with their new mama and papa. Baby Emilio had gained a little weight and reattached himself to Brad immediately. Everyone was healthy, and communication was a little easier after six months of Spanish classes.

Then another miracle occurred. Instead of the resistance the couple were expecting toward their “gringo” attempts to expedite the process, everyone bent over backwards to help. The lawyer put all her cases on hold and walked papers from one government office to the next. Documents were signed, stamped and passed on to the next department. Entire lines of waiting people were bypassed as miracle after miracle continued to follow this family’s coming together. One by one the hurdles fell, and then the grandparents waiting at home got a phone call. Brad and Nancy were coming home, as planned, on time—with the kids! They had done it!

Now they had to fly home to Canada, passing through first U.S. and then Canadian immigration. Would they be hassled?

Airline agents greeted them with open arms and amazing assistance as they began their journey. They were escorted through all the checkpoints with ease, smiles and best wishes. More miracles! They arrived in Canada to the waiting arms of two sets of grandparents, seven new aunts and uncles, and many new cousins.

The fiesta held to celebrate the arrival of the children was a huge success. Brad and Nancy saw the most important part of their vision for their life together unfold that day—their own children, laughing and playing on the lawn, winning everyone’s hearts. With love, patience and endless support, the new family began to form.

The love story of Brad and Nancy is now twenty-five years old, but the love story that is their children continues to unfold with each passing day. When Nancy and Brad think of how their family miraculously came together, in their hearts they believe something like this may have occurred:

At another time, in another place, two women sat quietly talking. The first woman said, “I will not be able to conceive children next time, and I very much want to be a mother. Can you help me?”

The other woman said, “I will bear three children next time, but my role is not to live out that life as a mother. Will you love and take care of my babies?”

And the first woman replied: “How will I find you, how will I recognize the children?”

And the man standing quietly nearby said: “Don’t worry, I will know.”

Janet Matthews
Richmond Hill, Ontario

With a Little Help from Your Friends

T
rue friendship hath a thousand eyes, no
tongue; ‘tis like the watchful stars and just
as silent.

Samuel James Watson, 1876

In 1994, Julie and Michael adopted a little girl named Veronika from a Russian orphanage and brought her home to Canada. My daughter Leah met Veronika in second grade and have been inseparable ever since. Leah loved Veronika’s high energy and happy, optimistic attitude toward life. She also loved how Veronika could always make her laugh.

As the years passed, the girls moved back and forth between our two homes. It was as if each had the benefit of two families, not just one. My wife Krys and I loved having Veronika in our home, and we watched with pleasure how she greeted each day as an adventure. She truly became a part of our family and often travelled with us on our family vacations.

When they both turned thirteen years old, Leah and Veronika decided to have their bat mitzvahs together—a ceremony and celebration in Judaism when children reach this age. The hall was full of members from both families who had gathered together to celebrate this special day.

After the ceremony, Veronika’s mom, Julie, delivered a toast to our daughter Leah and shared with the room the story of how they first met.

“Leah, this is something I should have thanked you for years ago. As most of you know, Veronika was adopted when she was in second grade. At the time, Michael and I were trying to get Veronika out of Russia, and it was a very difficult process.

“We were hoping she would be with us before summer began. Michael went to Russia for a couple of weeks, but unfortunately, he was not able to get her. So we anxiously waited throughout the summer. At the beginning of August, we were told it was time to come and do the paperwork and bring Veronika home. It would take about a week.

“This time, I went to Russia. But instead of a week, it turned out to be over a month. It was a heart-wrenching time for all of us, not knowing whether we would get Veronika out or not. But we were very determined that we would not leave Russia without her. Finally, on the September long weekend, we landed back on Canadian soil. I was home to my family and Veronika was home to her new family. As you may imagine, we were thrilled!

“The unfortunate part of this, though, was that Veronika had just three days with us before she had to start school. Needless to say, this was a very disturbing and upsetting time for her. So the first day of school I went with her and sat with her at the back of the room, and she was so scared she left bruises gripping my arm. The next day was basically the same. Eventually, she actually had the courage to go and join the rest of the class.

“I realized it would have to come to a point where I couldn’t keep going to school with her, and I would have to leave her. But this wasn’t so easily done, for Veronika had never had someone who would go with her and come back for her. So on Thursday, I was about to leave her there, but I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t find the courage to leave her. But Friday was the day I said she was going to stay at school and learn that I could leave and that I would come back for her.

“We went to the lunchroom. She ate her lunch and I was about to leave and again she started to cry. I bent down to her and she was holding on to my arm. I let go of her hand and I said, ‘Veronika, you have to stay and I’ll be back.’ Of course, with our language barrier this was hard to do and she was crying. I was ready to start to cry again.

“As she went to grab my hand again, instead of her having a chance to put her hand in mine, this beautiful girl came up to me and she slipped her hand in Veronika’s. She looked me straight in the eye and said, ‘You can go. I’ll take care of her. I promise, I won’t leave her side.’

“Leah, you have kept your word. You have never left my daughter’s side. This was such a difficult time for Veronika and me, and I don’t think you ever realized the important role you played for us that day in helping the two of us out. For me, being able to leave, to show Veronika I would come back. And for Veronika, to realize she wasn’t alone.

“I lay with Veronika one night in bed, and I asked her, what did she think of the school? She told me she thought it was another orphanage—a big building with lots of kids and few adults. Leah, you helped her through that time. You did this unselfishly, without even realizing how you were helping me and how you were helping Veronika.

“I have seen you with Veronika and with (Veronika’s sister and brother) Jade and Ryan and with your other friends. You are a remarkable young woman. And if I could have one wish for you, it would be to always have that open heart, to see when people need help, and not just to see it, but to do something about it. That is a true gift, Leah, because not everyone possesses that quality.

“So I want you to know that you hold a most special place in my, and Michael’s, heart. Family are relatives that you are born into. Friends are family that you choose. We are so honoured to have you as a part of our family.”

When Julie sat down, there wasn’t a dry eye in the place.

As any parent knows, there are moments in life when you are so proud of your kids your heart just about bursts. For Krys and I, this was one of them. For Leah, it was the greatest gift of all.

Lorrie Goldstein,
editor, The Toronto Sun
Toronto, Ontario

Four-Legged Guardian Angels

I
f you talk to the animals they will talk with you
and you will know each other. If you do not talk
to them you will not know them, and what you
do not know, you will fear. What one fears, one
destroys.

Chief Dan George

Snow had just melted off the ground that April day at our house in Regina Beach, Saskatchewan. My husband, Doug, had just cleaned up the pool in preparation for selling our house. The year before, Doug had lost his job with the provincial government, and now our financial situation was grim. In despair, we had finally put our home on the market, and a real estate agent was due to show up later that day. Even worse, we would have to give up our two beloved Great Danes, Bambi and Brigitte, because we could no longer afford the cost of feeding them. The thought of losing our dogs and our beautiful home was almost more than I could bear.