Choked (Devoured #3) (8 page)

Kirk knocked on the door and waited. Dee Dee Henry
opened it a few moments later and shrank when she saw him.

“Kirk.”

“How about today? Will she see me yet?”

Dee Dee shook her head. “I don’t think she wants to
see you today either.”

“But it’s been two weeks! I’m begging you Dee Dee.
Please.”

Ed Henry appeared behind his wife. “You can’t keep
coming here and disturbing us every day like this, Kirk. Don’t you think you’ve
done enough to upset Madeline without stalking her like this?”

“Stalking her!” Kirk pulled his hair. “She’s my
wife!”

“Maybe you should’ve appreciated that fact sooner.”
Ed walked away.

Kirk put his hands in front of him. “Dee Dee, c’mon.
You know I deserve a chance to explain myself.”

“I don’t know anything, Kirk. There are only two
people that can tell you where to go, and the one that’s here doesn’t want to
see you. Sorry.” Dee Dee started to close the door.

Kirk stopped the door with his hand. “I won’t leave
until she sees me.”

“Then you can sit in the car like yesterday, Kirk.
There’s nothing I can do.”

After Dee Dee closed the door, Kirk sat on the porch
steps. He turned when he heard it reopen.

“Get off my porch,” Ed said before shutting the door
again.

Kirk stood up and went to sit in his car. He leaned
his head against the headrest and closed his eyes.
Dear God, just give me a chance
to talk to her.

He didn’t bother asking for the right words to come,
though. Because he knew there weren’t any. All he could do was hope that
Madeline would find it in her heart to forgive him because he was lost without
her.

Suddenly, the front door opened and Madeline stepped
out onto the porch.

At first Kirk thought he was imagining things, but
after a few blinks he realized it was her and jumped out of the car.

“Madeline!” He ran up to her so happy he thought he
might cry.

She crossed her arms when he approached and took a step
back when he tried to hug her. “You look like crap.”

Kirk swallowed. “I’ve been waiting to talk to you
for two weeks.”

Madeline made a face like she had a bad taste in her
mouth.

“Can we talk?” He gestured to the front step.

“Not here. Let’s talk in the car. My parents have
heard enough.”

Madeline’s apparent repulsion only increased when
she saw the inside of the car. There were crumpled fast food bags on the floor
and even a greasy pizza box on the back seat. She sat down on the edge of the
seat.

“Look, Kirk. You can’t keep coming here. I don’t
want to see you, and it’s upsetting my parents.”

“Madeline, please come home. You’re my wife. I-”

“I was your wife, Kirk, but I’m not anymore.” She
kept her arms crossed and one foot on the ground outside the car. “I don’t even
know who you are. What I do know is that you’re not the man I married. You’re
not the man I’m going to spend my life with. And you’re not the man I’m going
to raise my baby with. So really, there’s no reason for me to see you anymore.”

“I know I made a mistake, Madeline. I know I don’t
deserve you-”

“Well we agree on those things.”

“But I love you and I’m sorry and I’ll do anything
to make it up to you.”

“Too little too late I’m afraid.”

“You’re the best thing in my whole life.”

“Turns out that doesn’t count for much.”

“But I don’t know what I’ll do if I lose you-”

“I guess you should have thought about that before
you started screwing your student.”

“But I never loved her. It was just sex. It didn’t
mean anything. And I didn’t know she was crazy.”

“Were you ever going to tell me Kirk? Are you really
sorry or are you just sorry you got caught?”

“I’m really sorry. I’ve never been so sorry in my
whole life. Honestly, I wish I could take it back. I hate myself for doing this
to you.”

Madeline pursed her lips. “Yeah. I really want to
believe you because it would probably make me feel a little better.”

Kirk rubbed the corner of his eye with the heel of
his hand.

“Unfortunately, you’re obviously so comfortable
lying to my face over and over again that even if I believed you, I’d be a fool
to accept your apology.”

Kirk rested an elbow in the bottom of the steering
wheel. “I’ll do anything, Madeline. Just tell me what you want me to do.”

“Anything I want?”

“Anything. Anything to make it up to you.”

“I’ll tell you exactly what I want Kirk.”

He raised his eyebrows and held his breath.

“I want you to sign the papers when you get them, I
want you to leave me and my family alone, and I never want to hear from you
again. If you care about me at all, you’ll give me a chance to start over.”

Kirk shook his head. “No. I love you too much. And
I’m not a bad person. I just made a mistake.”

“Tell it to the judge.”

“I have a right to see my son, Madeline.”

“No. You
had
a right to see your son before
you became a despicable person, but I’m sure you’d agree that there’s no benefit
to him being around you now.”

“The boy will want to know who his father is.”

“Well don’t worry.” She stepped out of the car. “I
won’t tell him the truth.”

“This conversation isn’t over.”

“You have something else to say?”

Kirk stood up and spoke over the hood of the car.
“Don’t you still have feelings for me? Don’t you want to work through this and
give me another chance?”

Madeline walked around the front of the car. “If
you’re wondering whether I’m heartbroken, the answer is yes, of course I am.
I’ve never hurt so badly or felt so sick in my whole life.”

Kirk stepped to the side and closed his door so
there was nothing between them.

“The only thing I can imagine that would be more
devastating would be if I wasted any more of my love or my life on you.”

“No,” Kirk’s voice cracked. “Don’t do this.”

And without another word, Madeline walked back up
the driveway and out of Kirk’s life forever.

I didn’t mind it here at Brayside when I first
arrived. I was having kinkier sex with the other patients than I’ve ever had
before. I thought it was hot, being trapped in a building with a bunch of
people already strapped to their beds. It was better than any summer camp I
could imagine.

But then they told me fucking other patients isn’t
allowed, like we shouldn’t have the same basic human rights here that we would
have on the outside. Which is bullshit. Now they keep me so medicated I have to
fiddle myself silly just to get to sleep.

Some days I think about Kirk and what his life is
like without me. Less exciting no doubt.  I wonder what lies he told his wife
and if she took him back in the end. But it doesn’t matter. The important thing
is that he was inside me. Is inside me. And he always will be.

And I know he misses me. In fact, just the other day
he came to visit. Well, he didn’t come all the way inside. I saw him from the
window. I watched him walk through the parking lot. He made it all the way to
the door this time.

I get why he didn’t come in. Before him, I didn’t
know how crazy love could be either. But of all the drugs I’ve tried since I’ve
been in this place, nothing’s compared to our love. It was pure, clean, and the
effects were long lasting. Nothing ever got me higher.

I know he’ll be back. And when he comes I’ll be ready
and waiting. I can’t wait to see his face when he discovers I’m not wearing any
underwear under my tunic. Because I’m not allowed. Because they think I’m
dangerous. And they’re right.

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Hazel

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