Clipped by Love (Bellevue Bullies #2) (54 page)

“No,” he answers quietly, and my heart sinks. He’s always so strong, so positive, but when it comes to his family, they are his breaking point.

Biting my lip, I try to think what to say, but then he is talking. “He donated twenty grand to the team, which I know is great, but why can’t he help my mom? She’s been struggling, we all have, trying to keep her afloat. And he’s just rolling in the dough, not even worried about anyone but himself.”

“Because he’s a selfish asshole,” I answer, pulling his head back so I can look at his face. His eyes are swimming in tears, and something inside me just breaks. Framing his face with my hands, I whisper, “He has no control over you. You are so much stronger without him, Jayden. Don’t let someone who has done nothing for you tell you how to do anything. You are good, your mom is fine, and everyone is better without him. You guys will prevail, I know it.”

His mouth pulls up at the side, but his eyes, they are just sad as he says, “I told myself that, but it didn’t work.”

“Is it working now?” I ask, hopeful.

“No, but having you here is helping.”

Smiling, I say, “Well, that works too.”

Nodding his head, he leans his face into my stomach while his fingers tickle the inside of my thighs and I just hold him. I don’t know what else to do, what else to say. So I just hold him. He’s always the stable one in everyone’s life, the rock, and I may be emotionally inept, but I can comfort him.

For him, I will do anything.

Pulling back, he looks up at me, and I smile before bending down to kiss his lips softly to show him I’m here for him. But like always, our kisses never stay soft or sweet, they always turn hot and demanding. As his fingers thread in my hair, his arm goes around my waist as he stands. I wrap my arms around his neck as he holds me close, our bodies moving together in a way that is indescribable. They captivate me, his lips do, and I wouldn’t want to be a hostage to anyone but him.

As he presses me against the door, I deepen the kiss, my tongue moving with his as his hands slide down my leg to behind my knee, squeezing me as we kiss with such conviction. When his fingers slide between my legs, I break away from his mouth, breathless.

“Here?”

“Oh, yeah. Here. Now,” he growls against my mouth before sliding his fingers into my thong. When he moves them along my slick lips, I gasp against his mouth, arching into his hand as his fingers find my clit. Whimpering against his lips, his fingers assault me in the best possible way, and I am lost beneath his touch. When he tears his mouth from mine, dropping to his knees, I’m breathless as he scoots my skirt up to my hips. Kissing down my thighs, he pushes my thong to the side, hooking my leg up on his shoulder before dropping his mouth between my legs.

Biting into my lip, I am helpless beneath his mouth, doing everything not to cry out as his mouth devours me in such a dirty but satisfying way. When he dips his fingers inside of me, I come off the door, arching against his mouth as he swirls his tongue around my clit. My whole body is on fire and I pray that sweat isn’t smearing my makeup, but then, really, I don’t give a shit. All I care about is the pleasure he is giving me.

And when I come, I come hard.

My orgasm rocks my whole body, shakes me to the core. And as I cry out, his name escapes my lips and lights go off behind my closed eyes. My heartbeat is pounding in my ears as his lips trail up my thighs, licking and nibbling before he stands and presses his lips to my neck and then my jaw.

“Shh,” he chuckles before biting my bottom lip.

“Shh? Are you serious?” I ask, unable to breathe.

“Yes,” he teases, kissing my lips once more as his hands make quick work of his pants, pushing them down before getting a condom out of his wallet. Sheathing himself, he lifts me up, holding me before directing his cock inside of me, filling me so fucking completely. I gasp against his mouth, and his fingers bite into my thighs as he thrusts up inside of me, each thrust harder than the last.

It’s perfect. So damn perfect.

Meeting his mouth to mine, he stills inside of me, and I can feel him about to come. But then he parts from me, looking down at me with something in his eyes that isn’t sadness. He’s eyeing me so I eye him back, and then he smiles.

“What?”

“Nothing,” he answers, and then he is moving into me again.

“No, what?”

Meeting my gaze, he grins. “You’re gorgeous.”

I don’t know what I thought he would say, but I really wasn’t thinking it’d be that. It’s obvious that whatever he wanted to say, he isn’t going to say now, so I let it go, leaning my forehead to his and moving my nose against his. I whisper, “You’re amazing, Jayden.”

Smiling, he cups my chin in his hand before taking my mouth with his in such a way that it almost seems like it’s different. I don’t know how to explain it, but I feel like something’s changed.

Really, everything has changed, and I’ll never ever be the same after him.

As he thrusts up into me, he gasps against my mouth, my name only a whisper as he comes, his eyes squeezing shut. Smiling, I cup his face as he jerks inside of me, and I can’t help but think how beautiful he is. And all mine. When he opens his eyes, he looks deep into mine before kissing me hard against my lips. Savoring the feeling, I wrap my arms hard around his neck before nuzzling my nose against his.

“What is it about us and stairwells?” he whispers against my mouth, his breathing just as hard as mine.

I smile as I shrug. “Maybe it’s our thing?”

Grinning, he says, “Well, if there is a thing to have, that’s it, eh?”

“For sure, I’d be stuck in a stairwell with you, anytime,” I whisper, trailing my lips along his.

He traps my face in his hands and I meet his desire-filled gaze, but then, I’m not sure if it’s desire. It’s something more, something intense. I think I know what it is, but I won’t ever say I saw it. Instead, I just look at his nose as he whispers, “Thank you.”

“For? Sex? Any time, buddy,” I say with a wink, wanting to lighten the situation because I’m pretty sure what’s in his eyes is in mine, but honestly, that’s not true. It can’t be.

“No, for being there for me,” he says, not even cracking a smile. “Really, it means more than you know.”

Looking down at his mouth shyly, I smile. Everything inside of me is falling for him, but my brain is begging everything to stop, to slow down, and just think this through. Can I do this? Can I really give my whole self to him?

Clearing my throat, I whisper, “I think I’ll take a word from your script.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” I say, meeting his gaze again. “Always, Jayden. I’ll always be here for you.”

His mouth pulls up to the side as he cuddles me harder into his chest and his eyes burn into mine. If this is what love feels like, then why am I fighting it? Why can’t I just give in? Allow him to have me. All of me. Because, as his lips move, I feel like he is saying more than what his words say, and even what he does say freaks me out.

“I’m gonna hold you to that.”

But I only nod because, damn it, I want him too.

I want to try.

M
aking a face, I tilt my head to the side.

“I don’t know, Markus, are you sure?”

I meet his gaze in the mirror and he nods appreciatively. I feel a little self-conscious in my one-shoulder white toga, but then Markus is wearing a very thin white sheet around his waist with green underwear that you can totally see. He doesn’t seem to mind a bit either, but me, I need more layers or something. But I did do well on my hair and makeup, so I might actually be picking this girlie crap up.

Might, being the very
big
key word.

“If I didn’t see you as my best friend, I’d want to do you.”

A small grin pulls at my lips as I sway shyly back and forth. “Aw, how sweet.”

He shrugs. “Yeah, you’ve grown on me.”

“You have too,” I admit, and I might even consider him one of my closest friends. He’s a sweet guy, and I really don’t think I could have made it through a lot of my physical therapy courses without him, or really, the last couple months. He’s refreshing and easy to talk to. Also, he’s just downright hilarious, except when he’s picking on me and Jayden.

Mmm…Jayden.

He’s probably already out, making sure the party is going well. He’s so good at directing that kind of stuff. Then there is Jace and me, who are worthless at planning parties. I’m really excited for Jayden to see me and even more excited to get him to sneak away with me later. Things between us have been…great. Yeah, that’s a good word to describe us. It’s so easy now. When before I was fighting so hard to keep him away, now, I couldn’t fight with him if I wanted. That doesn’t mean we agree on everything and have that fluffy, happy relationship. No. We fight over stupid stuff. Just last week, he got mad that I watched an episode without him, and then yesterday I tore into him for not getting me Sonic on the way back from class. We’ve become like an old married couple, really. When we aren’t playing, we are studying or lying around together, and then we are nagging each other on the stupidest stuff.

It’s my kind of perfect, and I wouldn’t change anything about it. Except for the fact that I can’t seem to let myself fully fall. It’s insane. I mean, I feel it. I feel like he’s it, I know he probably is, but something inside me is holding me back. He just had an interview with the Devils, and all I could think was, while, yes, I want him to go, I know they won’t take me. So then I was calculating how far apart we’d be, and ugh, it gave me such a headache. While I am scared that we couldn’t survive being apart, I’m terrified of the thought of not being together in any form.

And then I’m pretty sure that he hasn’t fallen either. I mean, sometimes I see it in his eyes, like that complete admiration for me, and yeah, maybe love. But then if that was the case, why hasn’t he told me? He isn’t shy; he tells me what he is feeling at all times, but that isn’t something he’s shared. So then I think maybe he’s over there, thinking the same thing I am, that a long-distance relationship, especially when we are rookies, won’t work.

Hell, I don’t know. It’s all so hard and scary, but then I think that it would be harder if we weren’t together. He’s such a stable force in my life now. Someone I go to for almost anything and everything. I can’t imagine him not being there, but I know time is against us and soon he won’t be. We are gonna have to part, unless for some crazy freaking reason we go on the same team. But whether or not I’ll be picked to go into the NHL isn’t even a solid yes yet. So yeah, I have no clue and it’s killing me. I want to just have it all written out for me. I want to know what he is feeling, and I want to know for sure what in the hell I’m feeling.

I feel like I’m in limbo, but then I’m there with Jayden, and that’s okay.

Kinda.

The anxiety is still there. Hardcore. But I’m trudging on because every time I look at him, all I feel is summer. It was honestly one of the first times in forever that I actually let go and let someone in. I didn’t hold back, I didn’t calculate every move, I lived. Yeah, it didn’t end well, but I’ll never forget that moment. The moment I looked into his dark green eyes and felt something. Something more than the norm.

He’s the best part of who I’ve become.

Which is corny as hell.

But I don’t care.

“Why are you smiling like that?” Markus asks me, getting my attention. “No reason to get all sentimental, Baylor. I know that deep down in your soul lies a real girl, but come on, I’m still a dude.”