Consequences (14 page)

I don’t know what to say, all these
situations are so new to me … I’m dumbfounded. To keep my hands
busy, trying not to let on my discomfort, I set to work on serving
the omelets. I understand the pain of wanting something you can
never have; now, I thank god that my mind allowed my heart to heal.
I can’t imagine the heartache a person must be experiencing to
create such an intricate fantasy … and then to have that vision
crushed? “Why do you think your mind created her, in the first
place?”

“I guess, I know the answer to that, too …
she was my conscience. After what I did to Ann … that’s when she
appeared for the first time. Something cracked, and the only way I
could hold together was to believe that Ellie was with me … that
she forgave me.”

Okay, it is time to stop walking on egg
shells, and be done with the story of what happened in Vegas.
Knowing that Christopher can hear the resolution of the words in my
head, I state simply, “It’s time to finish the story.”

He solemnly nods his head as I set the food
down in front of him. I can tell he has no appetite, but he picks
at the food and eats nonetheless. So, I wait for him to
continue.

He cleans his plate without enthusiasm and
puts it in the sink, then pours himself a glass of milk and grabs a
Summer ale for me. He is planning on this being a long
narrative.

“We left off with me telling you about
James’s execution, right?”

“Yeah. You and Lune were trying to hide from
his torture.” The evenness in my voice disturbs me a little.

He nods as he sits back down at the table.
“That was one of the longest nights of my life … listening to James
scream, until V became bored. As the hours wore on I became
desensitized to the noise, and actually fell asleep. When I woke, I
could feel V in my head again … overwhelming my emotions; all he
left behind was nothingness, what Ann called 'the void’. I got up,
took a shower, even made a meal and took Lune for a walk … the void
never lifted. I didn’t care about anything anymore. I’m not sure if
it was V’s influence, or my broken psyche, but I was completely
numb. So when he told me I had one more test and then I would be
free forever, I shrugged my shoulders and followed him blindly into
insanity.”

“Was he using his ‘talents’ on you at the
time? Was it like when you were at the old man's hotel?”

“Yes and no. Yes, because the complete lack
of emotions was overwhelming, similar to the rage I felt under V.
And no, because there were none of the side effects of his
manipulation evident; I think for the most part I was acting on my
own.” Something flashes in Christopher’s eyes as he admits his
guilt … self-loathing.

“Let me guess, V’s last test involved you
doing something to Ann.”

His posture showed me that the self-loathing
mixed with shame, as he nods again.

“V waited until I was standing in front of
her, in her little flat, to tell me what he wanted me to do.”

“Did you hide your motive from her? Did you
lie to her, about why you were there?”

“I didn’t have to … Ann is the type of
person, who once you’ve gained her trust, she’ll give you the shirt
off her back. She’s also the type of person that if you mess with
that trust, she’ll never give you the chance to make that mistake
again.” His voice breaks subtlety, but he continues.

“She opened her door for Lune and me, just
like countless other times, without questions, just a smile … happy
to see us. I didn’t exchange niceties as usual, but she didn’t
notice that anything was wrong, until it was too late. I was
already in her mind, pulling up images: her parents’ death, life on
the streets, every degrading thing she had to do to stay alive. The
humiliation on her face should have stopped me, but I only dug
deeper … pulling up everything that hurt her. While holding those
disastrous images in front of her mind's eye, I drug out everything
that might give her hope of returning to happiness: joking with her
mom and dad, the first boy she kissed, the love she had for friends
and family, even memories of our first meeting. As I pulled the
memories of bliss from her mind, I watched her slide to the floor …
defeated. V was sucking up every second, every ounce of her hope …
feeding on her like a leech, while I killed her. His voice still
haunts me … ‘MORE! MORE! MORE! Ahhh, I haven’t fed like this in
centuries.’ Her fear was evident as V obviously showed her his true
self; he pulled off his mask so she could look at him as she died.
I could see physical changes in Ann as we continued, humiliation
changed to dejection, and then to betrayal. Her eyes began to sink;
dark circles were developing in the soft tissue underneath them.
She was strong, fighting me on every memory; but as V sucked away
her soul, it became obvious she was fighting a losing battle.”

“How could you?” I may not know Ann, but we
spoke of her strength on many nights, and I was looking forward to
meeting her someday. My anger turns the beer in my mouth into warm
acid.

He ignores my outburst and continues on with
the story, forcing it out like involuntary retching. “I wasn’t
surprised to see the fire in her amber eyes start to go out as she
finally lost the strength to struggle. She lived for the fact that
she was never going to be a victim; she was never going to allow
anyone to take advantage of her consideration again. In one fell
swoop, I’d taken away both of those and shattered her pride. My
betrayal broke her more than what we were actually doing to
her.

"I don’t know where she found the strength to
do it … but she pushed one last thought into my head. The potency
of her words was made that much stronger, because of what she had
to give up forcing them into my mind. She gave up everything …
every last inch … she gave up the will to live, just to send me one
last message, ‘Seeing you like this, would kill Ellie.’

I hadn’t thought about Ellie in weeks … V’s
manipulation, and then recovering from V’s power over me, had all
but wiped her from my mind. Shock, disbelief, shame. I broke my
hold on Ann as I realized what I had done … what I was doing.
Standing there astonished by my own idiocy, I didn’t see Lune
strike until it was too late to put my hands up. His right paw
caught my chin, and snapped my head back, and with his weight
against my chest, we both hit the ground, hard. Before I could
recover, he struck again, this time grabbing me by my throat. I
could feel his teeth digging into my jugular; I was sure he was
going to kill me. I could feel the powerful piercing pressure as he
broke the skin. I remember the burning in my jaw, and thinking that
it was probably broken … as I started to lose consciousness.

“Lune held me there, tight enough to cut off
circulation, but loose enough to keep me on the brink of blacking
out. I was completely incapacitated. My head started to throb and I
could hear my pulse in my ears, then a bright light flashed before
my eyes. I saw Ellie standing in front of me on the day she had
left us in Colorado. This was a memory no one other than Lune could
have witnessed: A vision deep into the mist, where my eyes were
blind. Ellie was encased in green light, making her seem magical,
and angelic. When she spoke in a whisper, it wasn’t to me, but to
the observer. ‘Take care of him, I’ll be back, and I love you both
very much.” She bent down and gently swept her face across mine …
no, not mine; Lune’s.

"I heard wailing around me as Lune held me to
the floor. I remember thinking that was good, because Ann must
still be alive … that was, until I realized it was me, who was
making the grisly, guttural sound. I unconsciously tilted my head
back to let out the cry, and in doing so drove Lune’s fangs deeper
into my throat. I was ready to die right then, right there …
bleeding out from the wounds my best friend made. I wanted to see
myself dead, lying next to the corpse of one of my strongest allies
and friends. ‘Ann’, I moaned, horrified by what I’d done.

"I was hoping darkness had taken me; but when
I felt the pressure on my chest, I forced my eyes to open and focus
through my tears. Ann was kneeling over me, supporting herself with
one hand on my chest, and with the other she was stroking Lune’s
fur, telling him it was okay to release me. His tongue was soft as
it pressed against my esophagus, giving him leverage to pull his
teeth out of my neck. The pressure stopped, but the burning didn’t
… I was sure that I was going to bleed out. As my thoughts cleared
a little more, I realized that if he had punctured an artery … I’d
already be dead.

"Ann, still very pale … her complexion had a
grey tint, as if she was the one who had lost all of her blood. She
put her head on my chest, and whispered, ‘I forgive you’, as she
passed out. I reached up to examine the damage, Lune’s bite had
rolled over the jugular and missed any major veins, but I was still
bleeding freely. He knew exactly what he was doing … just enough to
take the fight out of me. At the same time, he knew he’d have to
take me close to death to pull me away from V’s control
permanently. The gouges along my jaw were bleeding worse than the
punctures on my neck. The cuts from Lune's claws opened up to
almost an inch when I flexed my jaw muscles.

"I slid out from under Ann, and ignoring the
amount of my blood on the floor, I picked her up and moved her to
the couch. She still had a pulse, but, by her color, she looked
like she shouldn’t. Lune watched us cautiously from the corner of
the room … making sure I didn’t have a relapse. Walking to the
kitchen, I grabbed a towel and dampened it with hot water, and then
placed it on Ann’s head. I was going to have to try and fix what
I’d done … but I couldn’t do anything if I passed out from blood
loss, so I went into her bathroom in search of a first aid kit.
Then I searched the kitchen junk drawer until I found a tube of
superglue, and returned to the bathroom to dress my wounds.

"I scrubbed my injuries with soap, and then
soaked them in peroxide. After gluing the cuts closed, I covered
them with butterfly bandages, to keep them from tearing open when I
moved my jaw. Then I packed the punctures with antibiotic ointment
and covered them with large, cotton bandages that I held in place
with tape. I had almost used up the entire box of cotton bandages
trying to stop the bleeding. Looking in the mirror, I was pleased
the swatches of sterile, white mesh stayed white. I turned to find
Lune, still cautious, standing in the doorway; he flashed the image
of Ann laying on the couch into my head. We had a connection now …
and it wasn’t going to go away any time soon.

"Returning to the couch, I picked up Ann’s
hand. She seemed so fragile. I concentrated on every memory I had
taken, and a wave of nausea overcame me as I relived what I’d done.
I ran to the kitchen, and stood over the sink until the queasiness
passed. Cursing myself for being so weak, I returned to Ann’s side.
Biting back my emotions, I focused on Ann again, and returned
everything I taken.

"For good measure, I sucked the venom of V’s
mind out of Ann's memories, and into my own. That was when I heard
Ellie’s voice the first time … quietly whispering questions, asking
me how I could allow myself to become such a monster.” Obviously
shaken, Christopher looks down at the table, whispering the last
sentence.

Still tasting my anger, I try to hide it from
my voice, “What about V?”

“He hadn’t left; I could feel him trying to
force himself on me. Before my connection to Lune, his presence was
like a polar bear lying on my chest … but after Lune’s attack, he
felt more like a mosquito buzzing around my face. I don’t claim to
understand why V no longer had any power to manipulate me; but I
think the connection to Lune, and Ellie’s consciousness, built
walls that were impenetrable to V. I remember thinking that the
walls may not last long. I had already taken four or five hours to
dress my wounds and work on Ann; and I had a feeling that my time
was running out.

"I silently asked Lune what he thought I
should do. Images of the venom I’d pulled from Ann came to me, and
then came images of what I’d done to Ann from Lune’s perspective,
making me feel sick again. I understood immediately what he was
showing me.

“I honed in on V’s position, and using the
venom of his thoughts as a diving rod, I searched his mind for the
collection of his power, the pool of ecstasy built from everything
he had absorbed. I bit back a laugh, as I realized that the only
reason why I could take him by surprise was because James protected
the information that I could enter the minds of ethereal creatures.
James had his revenge; he would have enjoyed the damage I planned
to inflict. And, I did do damage … a lot of it. I pulled his
memories going back at least a century, before he realized what I
was doing. And I pulled another century before he could stop me.
His ravenous fantasies became my sickening nightmares to endure.
Both Lune, and the Ellie in my mind, told me it was what I
deserved.

“Unexpectedly, my invasion into his mind was
more effective than I could have imagined. Between my defenses, and
draining him of his substantial rations, he withered into a type of
hibernation. Looking at him through Lune’s eyes, I realized Lune
knew this would happen …V felt like a starving vampire, whose fangs
had just been pulled.

“I didn’t know how long V would remain
powerless, so I decided to work as quickly as possible. I finished
pulling all of the remaining poisons from Ann, leaving her with the
memory of V … but without any of the pre-existing fear. I couldn’t
protect her entirely, but I turned her into a much less satisfying
meal for V. Then I went through her office searching for the
information I needed to finish my plan. Not really wanting to come
with me when I left, Lune stayed behind to keep an eye on her. I
understood; if she woke, I, too, wanted her to be greeted by a
friendly face.