Constant Craving [Rapture Island 2] (Siren Publishing Everlasting Classic) (6 page)

As she surrendered to him, he’d fall deeper in love with her every day.

He knew that, and accepted it.

He was going into this with his eyes wide open, knowing that she had the power to hurt him no woman had ever had.

Letting her see that he cared for her and desired her, but not overwhelming her with emotion would be a hell of a balancing act, but he had no other choice.

He was in this for keeps and had to play it just right or risk losing her forever.

He went to the table and poured her a glass of wine, pretending not to notice that she stiffened each time he moved. “Let’s sit down and talk. Maybe that will help you relax.”

She frowned now, careful not to let their fingers touch as she accepted the glass of wine he held out to her. “Relax? How the hell can I relax around someone like you?” She looked away again, something she did with annoying—and fascinating—frequency.

Pouring his own glass of wine, he glanced at her and smiled, hoping to appear nonthreatening. “Someone like me?”

Her hand trembled as she took a sip from her glass, her beaded nipples and the hunger in her eyes telling him that fear had nothing to do with it. Frowning into her glass, she shrugged. “You know what I mean.”

Moving to the opposite end of the plush, white sofa with his own glass of wine, Gabriel lowered himself onto it, turning slightly toward her. He hoped that putting distance between them would give her a sense of security and enable him to move on to the next step.

His cock stirred under her stare, the apprehension and desire in her eyes telling him that his instincts about her were right.

She kept glancing at the bulge in his soft, cotton pants, and at his chest, her interest arousing as hell, and a good sign for the conversation he had planned for tonight.

Smiling, he inclined his head. “I know what you mean.” Taking a sip of wine, he watched her over the rim, mesmerized by the sight of the long leg she kept trying to cover up.

He had to get her to talk, and hoped that a few glasses of wine would loosen her tongue. “You think that men who prefer to dominate a woman are cruel. Have you had any experience with a man like that?”

Kelsey clenched her jaw and looked away. “Yes.”

Fury swelled inside him. “Are you saying you were raped?”

Kelsey smiled and shook her head. “No. Nothing like that. It scared me more than anything. He didn’t actually hurt me. It was the son of the people who took me in their foster home. He thought every girl wanted him and snuck into my room one night. Two black eyes and a bloody nose later, he hobbled out.”

Staring down at his glass, Gabriel kept all emotion out of his voice, so furious, he wanted to punch through a wall. “What was his name?” Clenching his fist in anticipation, he mentally calculated how much pain he could cause, and for how long.

Kelsey laughed and threw back her head, her eyes full of misery and a glimmer of gratitude. “What are you going to do—beat him up? I already did.”

Gabriel clenched his jaw, and set his glass down on the low coffee table before he snapped the stem.

“Good for you. I’m proud of you.” Regarding her steadily, Gabriel picked up his glass again. “And since then, you’ve been a control freak.”

“I guess. I never really thought about it.” Kelsey smiled, a smug smile Gabriel didn’t buy for a minute. “I do know that I have no plans to ever be a shrinking violet.”

Amused at the image of such an independent woman being so docile, Gabriel laughed softly. “So you like dominating men, do you?”

Kelsey laughed, throwing her head back. “Yep. Got my own whips and chains and all that other stuff. Christ, you sound like Julianna.” Shaking her head, she met his gaze. “I just don’t let them push me around. The few men I’ve been with have known that I wasn’t about to change my life for them. If they didn’t like the way I did things, then they knew where the door was.” Frowning, she stared down into her glass. “It took me a long time to find myself, and I didn’t want to lose that.”

“And still something’s missing?”

Kelsey took another sip of her wine, frowning down into the empty glass. “Yes.” Lifting her head, she blew out a breath. “I’ve always fantasized about being overwhelmed in the bedroom. You know—sex, but
more
. More intense, not just a quickie and it’s over.”

Gabriel smiled, hiding a wince when his cock jumped. “I know.”

Kelsey got up and went to the French doors and looked out, as if she found it easier to talk without looking at him, something he would have to work on. “It all sounds good in theory, and fine for fantasies, but I just can’t imagine being so defenseless. I’ve been thinking about it more since Julianna told me that you’re a Dom, and I have to say, I’m intrigued. But too scared to do anything about it.”

With a jerky movement, she gulped down the rest of her wine. “There. You wanted honesty. Now you know why what you want from me is impossible.” Turning to look at him over her shoulder, she laughed bitterly. “Hell—if that’s even what you want. You’ve been coming to the coffee shop for months, sitting there for hours, but never asking me out.”

Lifting a brow, Gabriel got to his feet and took several steps toward her, moving slowly so as not to alarm her. “Would you have accepted?”

“Not a chance.”

Grinning, Gabriel inclined his head again. “That’s why I never asked. I wanted you to get to know me. If you hadn’t, you never would have come here with me.”

Turning to face him fully, she shook her head, her eyes not quite focused. “Gabriel, I really have no idea what you want from me. I told you the truth about myself because I want you to understand that I’m not playing games, but I don’t want you to consider this week a waste of time. I’m attracted to you. I can’t deny that, but the rest…”

Gabriel smiled, wanting nothing more than to fold her in his arms and comfort her, but now wasn’t the time.

“I don’t consider one minute of my time with you a waste. I consider each one precious.” Taking her glass, he moved back to the low table and spread some cheese on a cracker. He didn’t want her to get drunk, and he hoped a little of the finger food he’d ordered would absorb some of the alcohol.

Offering it to her, he hid a smile at the way she somehow managed to take it without letting their fingers touch, promising himself that one day soon, she would crave his touch as much as he craved hers.

“I want you, Kelsey, and I fully intend to have you.”

Handing her another half glass of wine and another cracker, he gestured for her to sit on the sofa, careful not to touch her.

Soon
.

Expecting the look of panic, he met it, shaking his head. “I’m not going to attack you, Kelsey. I won’t touch you until you’re ready.”

Curling onto the sofa, Kelsey looked up at him through her lashes, her eyes greener than ever. “What if I can’t?”

Shrugging, Gabriel refilled his own glass and took a seat again, attempting to appear relaxed, when he was anything but. “We’ll see. I think you and I could find a great deal of happiness together.”

Staring into her glass, she finished chewing her cracker, the tip of her tongue appearing to lick away a crumb and making his cock throb. Taking another small sip of her wine, she tilted her head to the side, her eyes narrowing. “I would make a mess of things, and afterwards, we wouldn’t even be friends anymore. I’m afraid of that. You probably won’t believe this, but you’ve become a very important part of my life. I’d hate to lose that.”

Gabriel shifted, grateful that he’d worn loose pants. He knew she’d never appreciate being thought of as adorable, but when she tilted her head that way, and she looked at him with those compelling green eyes, he wanted to gather her close and cuddle her.

He wanted to protect her, to cherish her.

To make her his.

Gabriel twirled his glass, watching with amusement when she leaned forward and selected a grape from the array of snacks on the silver tray. “Let me ask you something, Kelsey. If you owned something that you valued above all else, something that you thought about day and night, something you cherished above all else, would you want to damage it?”

Popping the grape into her mouth, she paused as she reached for another, frowning. “Of course not.” Blinking, she sat back. “Wait a minute. Are you trying to tell me that you want to own the women you’re with?”

Gabriel met her eyes squarely, letting her see just how seriously he took this. “When I’m with a woman, my attention is focused on her. For that period of time, I possess her. I want a woman who’s
mine
.”

He’d never meant anything more.

Smiling at her look of shock, he reached for one of the plump grapes, his stomach muscles knotting with nerves and excitement. “You want to hear something really amusing? I didn’t even realize that I was ready for a woman of my own until I met you. I don’t even want to touch another woman. I want
you
, Kelsey, as much as I want my next breath.”

* * * *

Kelsey swallowed heavily, struck by the realization that she wanted him too much to avoid the inevitable. “What do you mean by that? I thought you had plenty of lovers.”

Trembling inside at the knowledge that this would really be happening—that she and Gabriel would become lovers, Kelsey struggled to hide her excitement, and the very real fear that she would disappoint him.

She couldn’t stop looking at his bare chest, wide and dark against the casual white, drawstring pants that settled low on his hips, her fingers itching to explore.

She didn’t even know if it would be allowed. She didn’t know if he was waiting for her to say or do something, and it left her in the unfamiliar territory of following his lead.

He smiled, his eyes filled with tenderness, but shimmering with a hint of something that looked surprisingly like sadness. “The women in my past are just that. Past. I haven’t been with another woman in months. I only want you.”

Kelsey gaped at him, wondering if she’d heard him right. She’d never imagined that he’d wanted her that way, and for so long. “What? Gabriel, I don’t—”

Gabriel held up a hand, cutting her off. “You’ve been honest with me tonight. I want to be honest with you. Trust is very important, remember?”

Kelsey swallowed heavily and nodded, her stomach tightening. “Okay.”

Gabriel stared into his glass. “I haven’t been serious about a woman in a long time. I’ve been with women, mostly at the club, but they’ve been casual. They knew the score, and it was all fun and games. I didn’t think I’d ever want a woman the way I want you. I never thought I’d want a woman to live with me, and to sleep in my bed every night—to share a future with.”

Kelsey blinked, curious and touched by his admission. “What happened? Did someone hurt you?” She hated the thought of any woman being close enough to Gabriel to hurt him.

Gabriel’s smile held a hint of sadness, a sadness that surprised her. “We wanted different things. She wanted the scenes and wanted to play. She wanted me to share her with others and liked to be the center of attention in the club. She did outrageous things and liked to make me jealous. She wanted me to pass her around when she knew damned well that I don’t share. It was all a game to her.”

Intrigued, confused, and desperate to understand such a complicated and intense man, Kelsey sat up. “I don’t understand. Isn’t it supposed to be a game?” Frowning, she set her glass aside, struggling to clear her head. “But why was it a game to her and not you? That doesn’t make any sense. You bossed her around. She would have had to do whatever you wanted.”

Shaking his head, Gabriel smiled faintly. “You know nothing about that kind of lifestyle. I’ll teach you.”

Kelsey sighed again, and took another sip of her wine. “I guess I thought it was all about sex. I mean, like in your club. I didn’t consider that a Dominant and a submissive would care for each other that way. Like I told you before, that part doesn’t make sense to me. You said something before about pain. That doesn’t make sense to me either. It scares me.”

He took another sip of wine, his eyes steady on hers over the rim of his glass. “I asked you before how you would treat something, or someone you value above all else. Do you really think I would mistreat a woman I cared for?”

“You could dominate a woman—have the kind of sex you like, and still care for her?”

“Of course.”

Kelsey reached for another grape as an excuse to look away. “Did you care for the women you took in the club?”

Gabriel smiled faintly. “Not in the way you mean. They want pleasure and excitement, and I give it to them. They gave me the same.”

Frowning into her glass again, Kelsey got to her feet and tried not to think about the number of women Gabriel had dominated in his club, women who knew how to play his games.

She didn’t know how she could ever compete with that.

Moving back to the French doors, she wrapped her arms around herself, chilled despite the warm sunshine.

To her surprise, Gabriel came up behind her, running his finger over her shoulder in a delicate caress that made every nerve ending tingle.

“It’s not as easy as you think for a Dominant to find a woman. What I need is not something that’s easy to work into a conversation. Sure, there are women in the club who offer themselves, but some of them want to make a play for the owner because it’s a status thing, or they’re looking for pleasure and nothing more. I have other business interests and can’t spend much time at the club, but when I’m there, I’m usually busy with things that need my attention.” Smiling, he slid his fingers over her shoulder again. “Besides, I find myself wanting something more.”