Corporate Daddy (14 page)

Chest heaving, he leaned over her, his weight levered onto one arm. She knew that he was looking at her, staring at her breasts, but somehow she couldn’t be embarrassed. Impatiently, she threw a hand around his neck and pulled him down atop her, gasping when bare skin met bare skin. Her nipples felt hard as rocks, the hair on his chest coarse and silky at the same time. He was heavy, solid, warm and firm. Reaching down, he pulled one of her knees up, making a place for himself between her legs, and shifting his weight onto one forearm.

“You’re beautiful,” he told her, his gaze never leaving hers. “I mean it, Em. You’re incredibly beautiful, and not just here and here.” He smoothed a hand over her face and down to cup one breast. “You’re beautiful inside and out. I think I always knew it and it frightened me for some reason. Maybe I sensed on some level that if I acknowledged it, I’d start to fall in love in with you.”

“Don’t!” she whispered. “Don’t say what you can’t mean.”

“I won’t,” he promised her, tugging at her nipple with his fingertips. Then he bowed his head and sucked the nipple into his mouth.

She nearly came up off the bed. He slid his hand down between her legs, cupping her there through her jeans. Rolling his hips against hers, he used his body weight and the erect length of his hardness to press and move his hand against her while his mouth tugged at her breast. Lightning knocked her eyes back in her head. He shifted, grinding his hips and his hand against her and angling his upper body away so he could show the other breast equal attention, but this time he licked and nibbled and kissed until she thought she would go insane. Undulating beneath him, she pulled up
both knees and dug her heels into the bed, desperately needing greater contact. He gave it to her.

Sliding his mouth up to her throat, he shifted until his body fully covered hers and, taking his hand away, rocked against her. His hardness against the seam of her jeans sent a flash of heat upward. His chest dragged against her swollen breasts, sending that same heat flash down again to explode low in her belly. He licked and nibbled a path to her mouth, surging against her repeatedly.

“Come for me,” he commanded.

Kissing her, he speared his tongue into her mouth and quickened the tempo of his hips, stroking hard against her, his arms sliding beneath her shoulders. It was not enough, and at the very same time it was too much. She clasped her arms about his neck and ground her mouth against his, helpless to resist the building tidal wave of climax. Tears pricked her eyes. Her nipples tightened almost painfully. When the great wave crashed over her, she wrapped her legs around him, as well, riding the crest for an instant, then tumbling and rolling beneath it. She didn’t remember breaking the kiss, but was vaguely aware of her strength fading into limp mindlessness.

She didn’t know how long he simply held her, his cheek pressed to hers, but eventually he lifted his head and said thickly, “I wish I had time to really make love to you. I want to be inside you the next time you do that.”

She opened her eyes, trying to think why that shouldn’t be, and he kissed her quickly. “I have to get the baby,” he said, and rolled away. In that very same instant, Emily realized that Amanda Sue was screaming the house down, shrieking at the top of her lungs. The baby had awakened from her nap and obviously had been demanding attention for some time now—and she hadn’t even heard her!

Dazed by this fact, Emily pushed up onto her arms, and the reality of the whole situation hit her with killing clarity. She was half-naked, moist with the remnants of a shattering sexual climax given to her by one of the world’s most
knowledgeable lovers, while the child in her care screamed with frustration. All her fine convictions, all her reasonable determinations had been swept aside by the potent touch of a man who could never really be hers. Shame bowed her head and brought tears to her eyes. Quickly, she scrambled up and began searching for her bra and sweater. The bra had been kicked under the bed. The sweater was stuffed down between the end of the mattress and the footboard. She yanked them on, trembling from head to toe. The rubber band holding back her hair had slipped to the end of her ponytail, but she had no time to fix it.

“Are you decent?” Logan asked cheerfully, coming into the room. He had turned Amanda Sue’s face into the hollow of his shoulder and carried a clean diaper, with which he shielded her view.

No
, she thought.
I guess not
. But then she pushed the guilt away and lifted her chin. “Is she all right?”

Amanda Sue sniffled and said around her fingers, “Oan num-nums.”

“Of course, sweetheart,” Emily said, her voice trembling. “I’ll get lunch on the table.” Avoiding eye contact with Logan, she slunk toward the door. He tossed aside the diaper and reached for her, but she pulled back at the last instant and slipped free. She needed time to compose herself, time to figure out how to handle this.

She had decided nothing by the time Logan, now wearing a T-shirt and jeans, carried Amanda Sue into the kitchen and put her into her high chair. He came to Emily and slid an arm around her waist while she cut into small pieces the sandwich she’d made for Amanda Sue earlier. “Emily,” he said, kissing the side of her neck, “I want you to know how much—”

“I can’t talk about this now, Logan,” she interrupted, stopping what she was doing. “Please.”

He looped his other arm around her chest and kissed the top of her ear. “All right,” he agreed after a moment. “If that’s the way you want it.”

“Thank you.”

He turned her to face him. “Don’t thank me,” he said, “because the deciding factor here is time. Just so you know, when I get back from New York, I don’t intend to let you out of my sight again until we’ve settled some things between us.”

Settled. She knew what that meant, and she knew that it could end only one way for her. She wondered if she had the courage to face it, the strength to walk away when the time came, for it would surely come. It was inevitable. It was what lay between then and now that she could not envision. She couldn’t even think about it, not yet. Amanda Sue banged on her tray, demanding her “num-nums,” and giving Emily an excuse to turn away again.

“Let’s eat lunch,” she said, “then you can spend some time with your daughter before you have to go.”

“My daughter and you,” he said, reaching around her for the nearest plate.

She closed her eyes as he moved away, wondering if he could possibly understand what he was doing to her, asking of her. Of course he couldn’t. They were miles apart on the idea of affairs. While romantic love for him was a transitory condition, it could never be so for her. If she allowed herself to make love with him, it would be because she was in love with him and always would be. He would break her heart. He was doing it already. She had to find a way to protect herself from the inevitable.

God help her.

Steeling herself, she moved to the table and tried to behave as if she had not just come one step away from giving herself totally to her notoriously fickle boss. It was easier than she expected, thanks to Logan himself, but then he’d had a great deal of experience at this sort of thing, while she had virtually none. Amanda Sue helped, too, demanding her usual generous share of attention. Emily gave herself some space by insisting that she clean up while Logan spend time with his daughter. Afterward, she volunteered to neatly
pack for him the things he had laid out on his bed and tried to keep the baby from flinging around.

It was a strange experience, folding Logan’s intimate articles of clothing, organizing his toiletries, making sure his suit and tie were spotless, a very wifely sort of thing. She allowed herself to imagine, for a moment, what it would be like to be married to Logan Fortune, to share this big bed with him nightly, to wake beside him every morning, to bear his child. But would she be enough for him? Could he ever remain faithful to just one woman? She couldn’t allow herself to believe it. She dared not believe it.

When she returned to the living room, he was giving Amanda Sue a “horsey” ride on his back. Emily sat down in the armchair to watch them. Logan ambled over on all fours, Amanda Sue holding tight to his hair with both hands, and “dumped” Amanda Sue off over his head, wrestling her around to his lap as he sat on the floor next to Emily’s legs, his back to the chair. He played the name-the-body-part game with Amanda Sue, with much tickling and giggling and smooching going on. When they’d run out of Amanda Sue’s body parts, he lifted Emily’s foot and asked, “What’s this?”

“Poot!” she announced confidently.

“Amanda Sue’s foot?” he asked.

“Yeah,” she confirmed, giggling at the obvious mistake.

“Well, this must be Amanda Sue’s ankle, then,” he said, kissing the part in question. Again his daughter insisted that it was. “And this must be Amanda Sue’s leg,” he went on, sliding his hands up Emily’s leg. When he reached Emily’s thighs, he pulled her off the chair onto the floor next to him, much to Amanda Sue’s amusement. Amanda Sue laughed when he kissed Emily’s belly, claiming it to be hers. When he kissed Emily’s shoulders and neck, arms and hands, elbows and knees, it was at Amanda Sue’s instigation. Finally Amanda Sue pointed to Emily’s mouth, and Emily knew that she should put a stop to the game, but before she could do so, Logan was kissing her quite thoroughly, so thoroughly
that Amanda Sue grew impatient and finally dug a finger between their mouths to separate them.

Logan snatched her up and tossed her over his head, pretending to scold her for pretending that Emily was her. Emily tried to move back into the chair, but he caught her hand with his and anchored her to his side. When Amanda Sue calmed down from her “scolding,” he sat her in his lap and explained that he had to take a little trip by himself but that Emily would take care of her until he got back.

“Yeah, Mimly un Mana,” Amanda Sue said, as if this was nothing new to her. Logan looked at Emily with raised eyebrows.

“I think her pronunciation is improving. She actually got the ‘L’ in Emily that time.”

“Well, she’s a very bright little girl,” Emily said, fighting this feeling of belonging, of connection, of
family
, that so often enveloped her when the three of them were together like this.

“Yes, she is,” Logan agreed, his forehead pressed to the little girl’s. Then he glanced at the clock over the mantel and sighed. “I have to get on the move.” He reluctantly passed the baby into Emily’s arms and got to his feet. “I’ve ordered a cab so you can keep my car. The keys are on my dresser. I want you to drive it instead of that old heap of yours. Promise me you will.”

She couldn’t argue that it wouldn’t be safer for Amanda Sue, so she agreed.

“I assume you’ll be staying here nights,” he said, “but it’s okay if you decide to take Amanda Sue to your place. I’ll call here first, but if I don’t reach you, I’ll call there. Remind me to buy you a cell phone of your own when I get back. Meanwhile, you can reach me through mine anytime you want.”

Emily said, “We’ll be fine.”

He nodded and turned toward the bedroom. In a few minutes he returned to the living room carrying his briefcase, suitcase and a heavy trench-style overcoat. He deposited
them in the entry hall by the door and returned to the living room, where Emily had gotten up and moved to the couch, Amanda Sue with her. He sat down next to them and gathered both into his arms.

“Is it just me or is her hair getting darker?” he asked Emily, stroking Amanda Sue’s curly head.

“You know, it may be,” she said. “This is about the time it starts turning. Yes, I think you’re right. It’s not as brassy bright as it was, more brown.”

“My mom will be heartbroken,” he said, chuckling.

“Not for long,” Emily said. “Amanda Sue’s a strong personality, one of a kind. It’s appropriate that her appearance reflect that.”

“You’re absolutely right,” he agreed, kissing his daughter on the top of her head. “I love you, ’Manda Mine.”

“Wuv oo,” she echoed almost thoughtlessly, sliding off Emily’s knee and going after Goody, who had put in an appearance after disappearing for a time.

Logan chuckled and shook his head. Leaning back, he pulled Emily tighter into his embrace. “God, I wish I didn’t have to leave you,” he said against her temple, “but at least I have you to come home to.”

She closed her eyes, the emotions of joy and doubt and fear mingling in simultaneous bursts within her. Her throat was clogged with them, her lungs restricted, her heart shocked. A horn sounded in the distance. Logan sighed.

“That must be my cab,” he said.

Emily sat up. Logan got to his feet. Once more he picked up his daughter and kissed her.

“’Bye-bye, Daddy,” she said unconcernedly, bending down to reach for Goody. With a laugh, he let her down again. “Walk me to the door?” he asked Emily.

Nodding, she got up and followed him. The car horn blew again just as they got there, so Logan opened the door and waved at the driver. Then he turned back to Emily, his hands resting lightly at her waist. “I’m going to miss you,” he
said. Smiling wanly, he added, “You’ve no idea how much I miss you every moment you’re not with me now.”

She gulped, wanting to believe that, not daring to. He bent his head and kissed her tenderly, pulling away again only when they were both breathless.

“I’ll call tonight.”

She nodded and pulled open the door again as he gathered up his baggage. One more look and he stepped out onto the doorstep. Suddenly she couldn’t let him go without giving him something, some bit of what was in her heart. “Logan,” she said, and he immediately turned back. “I’ll miss you, too.”

The smile that grew across his mouth also grew across her own. He stepped forward and kissed her hard on the mouth as the taxi driver blew its horn one more time. Then he was running down the sidewalk, coat flying out behind him. She stayed in the doorway until the taxi drove away. Only then did she fully face the fact that she was already in way over her head with Logan Fortune. She was crazy to try to make herself believe that she could hold herself back from him. Simply put, she was in love with him, so how did she keep herself out of his bed? Even if she could manage that feat, how did she keep herself from hoping for more from him than she knew he was capable of giving? Neither prospect looked good at the moment, but she knew that she would be less than she wanted and needed to be if she didn’t at least try.