Covet (45 page)

Tessa grinned at the enthusiasm in her companion’s voice. “Sounds like you eat here a lot.”

“Quite a bit. My boss Travis loves it, too, and especially his partner Anton.
They
don’t mind all the girly touches.”

Tessa ordered the chicken salad croissant and Julia the smoked salmon quiche, along with a tall glass of sparkling French lemonade for both of them. They ate hungrily, and Tessa reflected on how many meals she’d been skipping lately. Her sadness and loneliness over Peter’s absence had contributed to most of that, as well as the need to trim her already lean budget. She’d lost a few pounds as a result.

“I’m sorry if I said something to upset you earlier today,” Julia told her quietly as they waited for their dessert to be served. “Maybe it was my imagination, but you looked like you were going to collapse when I made that comment about being married. Is – is everything all right?”

Tessa nervously twisted the pale pink linen napkin between her fingers. “Um, it’s – not something I -”

Julia placed a hand on her forearm. “God, I’m sorry. I don’t mean to butt in. I was just worried about you, that’s all.”

Tears welled up in Tessa’s eyes, touched at Julia’s kindness. “No, it’s okay. It’s just – hard for me to talk about, you know? I haven’t told anyone else – there really isn’t anyone else to talk to.” She bit her bottom lip to keep it from trembling. “My husband – we’re getting a divorce. We, um – broke up about a month ago.”

Julia gasped. “Oh, Tessa. I’m so sorry, honey. What an idiot I am, putting my foot in my mouth that way. Are you okay?”

Tessa shook her head, unable to stop the tears spilling down her cheeks. “No, not really. It’s been so hard, Julia. I miss him a lot. He’s – well, he was all I had. I don’t have any family at all, haven’t for years, so I’m all by myself now. Peter was my best friend as well as my husband. My only friend, really. I hardly even know anyone else here in San Francisco.”

Julia looked aghast. “That’s awful, honey. I had no idea, no idea at all. God, I can’t even imagine not having my family or friends. Don’t you have friends back in – was it Tucson or Phoenix you were from?”

“Tucson. And no, I really didn’t have any close friends back there, either. For so long it was always just Peter and me.”

“How long were you married?” asked Julia curiously.

Tessa hesitated before replying, knowing the answer would be startling. “Seven years.”

Julia stared at her in disbelief. “Seven? How old are you anyway? I always thought you were a little younger than I was.”

The subject of her marriage was always an awkward one for Tessa to discuss, and now was no exception. “I’m, um, twenty-four. I was seventeen when Peter married me.”

“Seventeen!” Julia was visibly shocked. “God, you were just a child. Is that why – Jesus, never mind. I can’t believe I’m asking you stuff like this.”

“It’s okay. And no, it wasn’t because I got pregnant. It’s – complicated.”

“And none of my business,” declared Julia. “I honestly don’t mean to pry, Tessa. I’m just concerned is all. And it sounds like you could really use a friend right now, so please know that I’m here for you whenever you need me, okay?”

Tessa forced a teary smile. “You’re so nice, Julia. I can see why Mr. Atwood fell in love with you.”

Julia gave her a wink. “Well, it was definitely mutual – love at first sight and all that mushy stuff. Ah, here’s our dessert. Nothing like a big old sugar rush to make you feel better.”

The desserts came in huge portions, so they had agreed to split the towering slice of black forest torte. Julia dug into the cake with gusto while Tessa merely picked at it, her appetite having waned abruptly after the discussion about her impeding divorce.

“Come on, don’t make me be a pig and eat all of this myself,” urged Julia. “Nathan already teases me about my ass getting bigger.”

Tessa gave her a small smile and obediently ate a forkful. “It’s really good. Thanks for this. Not just lunch but - well, for being so kind to me.”

“It’s easy to be nice to nice people,” assured Julia. “And you’ve always been so sweet to me every time I’m over for a meeting. Not like those bitches you work with. I’m not sure which one I dislike more – Gina or Alicia.”

Tessa sipped her tea. “They’re practically joined at the hip so take your pick. And they’re roommates to boot.”

“Figures. Though if I had to pick the nastier one it would be that sneaky little witch Gina. She tries to flirt with Nathan every time we’re in the office, even though it’s very obvious he’s with me now. At least Alicia keeps her distance.”

“That’s because she’s got her sights fixed on Mr. Gregson instead,” Tessa blurted out. “But he never dates employees so she’s out of luck.”

Julia smiled mysteriously. “Hmm, bet I know of one employee he’d be willing to bend that rule for. Does Ian know you’re getting a divorce?”

Tessa shook her head, frowning. “No, of course not. I haven’t told anyone in the office yet. My co-workers tend to gossip a lot so I try not to discuss my personal life with them.”

“Wise move. I wouldn’t trust those two evil bitches for twenty seconds. And I know how fast office gossip can spread. My boss is a huge blabbermouth, I can’t tell him anything really confidential or it would be all over the place within five minutes.”

Tessa paused before asking her next question. “What did you mean about Mr. Gregson? The part about him making an exception to his rule.”

“You really have no idea?” Julia regarded her curiously. “Well, our Mr. Gregson would deny it, of course, being that he’s so prim and proper and always plays by the rules. But I’ve caught him more than a few times looking your way when you didn’t notice and – well, let’s just say I think he’d be
very
interested to know you’re going to be a single lady soon.”

Tessa stared at Julia in shock, her mouth hanging open in surprise. Slowly, she shook her head. “You’ve got to be mistaken. Badly. Mr. Gregson barely even speaks to me. And he is definitely not attracted to me.”

Julia took a sip of her coffee and grinned wickedly. “If you say so. But I’d be willing to bet he’d speak to you a whole lot more if he got wind of your impending divorce.”

“Please don’t tell him,” pleaded Tessa. “Not just him but anyone in the office. I’ll tell them when the time is right but – well, it’s just hard for me to confide in people. And even harder to talk about something as painful as this.”

“I get it. And I won’t say anything, even to Nathan. I swear, sometimes I think men are even worse gossips than women.”

Tessa offered to split the check, but Julia was adamant that this was her treat, plunking down a credit card casually.

“Thank you, Julia. Not just for lunch but for letting me cry on your shoulder. Not literally, of course,” added Tessa with a little smile.

“But pretty close, huh? It was my pleasure. Look, I want to give you my cell number, okay? And I really do want you to call me if you ever need to talk or want to hang out. We can go have coffee or get a drink or just take a long walk. Do you like yoga?”

Tessa took the business card Julia handed her, the cell number written on the back. “I love yoga. I can’t really afford it, though, so I mostly look for places that offer free or demo classes. What about you?”

“Yeah, it’s kind of my obsession. I go to class almost every day. You should come to my studio with me some weekend soon. My weekend teacher Sasha is awesome. She kicks my ass every single time I take her class. I can get you a complimentary pass if you’d like.”

“I’d love that,” beamed Tessa. “I, um, don’t really have any girlfriends so I appreciate your offer to – you, know, hang out.”

“Well, I don’t have very many myself,” confessed Julia. “So I’d really, really like to call you my friend. Okay?”

Tessa felt just a little bit less lonely – and alone - as she smiled at her new friend. “Okay.”

Despite the fact that her abs were already quivering in protest, Tessa forced herself to do another set of crunches on top of the hundred she’d already completed. She was using the slant board today, which was always tougher for her than the fitness ball, and thus had to push herself hard to finish the grueling workout. Besides the core work, she’d done an hour of cardio, split between the stationary bike and the elliptical machine, then lifted weights, focusing today on her biceps and shoulders.

She had been especially diligent these past couple of months about her workouts, rarely missing a day, and often spending close to two hours here in the employee fitness room. The extra training hadn’t been to get herself in better shape, or lose a few pounds. If anything, she was probably a little on the thin side right now, having unintentionally dropped some weight by skipping meals and working so many hours. The additional hours she’d spent working out had helped some to fill the otherwise lonely hours back at the apartment, had meant that much less time she had to spend there and be constantly reminded that she was now very much on her own.

Peter had gradually begun to contact her less frequently, his emails now only arriving once a week or less, and becoming shorter and shorter in length. Tessa knew that was his subtle way of letting her down gently, of forcing her to accept that he wasn’t a part of her life any longer, and that she needed to get on with things.

She finished her crunches, too wiped out now to consider doing even one more, and reached for a towel to wipe the sweat off her face and neck. As she drank from her water bottle, Tessa knew deep down that she was happy for Peter – happy that he was finally getting to live his dream – and she was really trying hard not to resent him for it. She couldn’t be Peter’s responsibility any longer, the weight that dragged him down, and was determined to finally grow strong enough to stand on her own two feet and not depend on anyone else to take care of her. It was hard, the toughest thing she’d ever had to do in a life that had been filled with hardships, but she was getting through it a day at a time.

The nights were by far the worst, the times when she was all alone in her tiny apartment with no one to talk to or hang out with. Julia had been wonderful, calling several times a week to chat, and they’d met for coffee a few times already. But at present Julia was still recovering from a near-tragic assault she’d suffered at the hands of Nathan’s jealous – and emotionally unhinged - ex-fiancée. Tessa had thought about dropping by her new friend’s flat for a visit but hadn’t wanted to intrude, especially since Julia’s parents had just arrived for a visit.

And now Thanksgiving was only about ten days away, and she knew Julia was flying to Michigan to spend the holiday with Nathan’s family. Tessa hadn’t even begun to think about what she might do herself, since she’d always spent holidays with Peter. The last couple of years they had gone to dinner at the home of one of his former co-workers at the news agency, but this year everything was different. She would most likely be alone on Thanksgiving, just as she was every day now.

As usual, she’d had the fitness room pretty much to herself at this time of the day. One of the women from Accounting had been here when she’d arrived, walking on the treadmill, and then two geeky IT guys had stopped in to use the weight machines for a few minutes. The room had been empty for the last forty-five minutes, the only audible noise coming through the earbuds of her tiny iPod shuffle. Peter had bought the device in Japan for her last birthday, and had loaded a bunch of songs on it that he knew she liked. It was one of her most cherished possessions, despite the fact it was really only worth about fifty dollars. Even now as she was cooling down before heading off to take a shower, she was tempted to sing and dance along with the throbbing beat of Bruno Mars’s
Locked Out of Heaven
.

She had the volume of the iPod cranked up so loud, in fact, that she didn’t hear the door to the fitness room open. It was only when she turned away from the water cooler that she realized someone else was in the room, and gulped in alarm when she saw who it was.

Jason Baldwin was smiling at her in what
he
likely thought was a seductive manner, but it more closely resembled a leer in Tessa’s mind. Reluctantly, she turned off her iPod and removed the earbuds, all too aware of how closely he was standing. A shiver of alarm traveled rapidly up her spine, and she instinctively took a step or two backwards.

But Jason wasn’t easily deterred and merely moved even closer, enough that she could smell the lingering scent of alcohol that clung to him. Tessa belatedly remembered that there had been some sort of cocktail reception on the schedule today, with most of the management team in attendance. In addition to the fitness room and showers, this floor held the employee lunch room, a few smaller conference rooms, and a large reception room complete with its own kitchen and bar that was used for entertaining clients and other such functions.

“Well, if I had known the most beautiful woman in the office was in here working out alone, I would have left that god-awful party a long time ago and joined you,” Jason told her in a very suggestive voice.

Tessa tried to brush past him without being too obvious. “I’ve actually just finished, Mr. Baldwin. If you’ll excuse me, please.”

He wrapped a restraining hand around her bare upper arm. “What’s the rush, sweet thing? You’re always running away from me when I’m just trying to be friendly. Or else that damned guard dog Andrew is hovering somewhere in the background like he’s your nanny or something.”

She attempted to pull her arm free but Jason’s grasp was unrelenting. “Please let me go, Mr. Baldwin. I – um, need to change clothes and then get home. My – husband will be expecting me.”

But he refused to release his grip, and instead raked her up and down with his heated gaze. She tried not to quiver in fear at the very obvious lust she saw in his eyes, and wished fervently that she hadn’t worn such skimpy workout attire – tiny gray terry gym shorts and a bright pink racerback tank that clung a little too closely to her breasts.