Cowboys and Highlanders (102 page)

“Charlie’s a good man.” TJ looked out the window. “You and Marion seemed to have found middle ground.”

“Might seem that way.”

“No?”

“Nope.” He took another hefty swallow of whiskey.

Allison’s scream cut through the still air of the kitchen. Neither TJ nor Train took a breath.

“Stay here,” Train said as TJ made a move toward the hall.

“She’s my wife!”

“And she’ll need you in a few minutes. Wait for Doc.”

TJ bowed his head attempting to hide the tears filling his eyes. Train realized there was a good chance the next time TJ saw his wife, she might not be alive.

* *
*
* *

The doctor ordered Marion to hold Allison down. He had given her a small amount of Ether but she was beginning to break free of the induced sleep.

“I’m scared!” Marion screamed when Allison’s blood soaked the sheets.

The doctor finally had the baby and placed it in a blanket next to him. “Hold her, I’m almost done.” His fingers were sewing as quickly as an expert seamstress stitches a hemline. Taking a deep breath, he wiped his hands on a sheet. “She’ll need to stay in bed until the stitches heal.”

Perspiration dotted Marion’s lip as she released the pressure she had on Allison’s shoulders. Her face was wet with tears she hadn’t realized she was crying. “Will she be able to have another child?”

“Maybe. If she does conceive, she’ll need to rest for the entirety. Her body is damaged.”

Allison stirred, her face contorted with pain. Clammy and pale from the loss of blood and the trauma of surgery, she looked much older than her years.

The doctor quickly covered the baby with a sheet. “I’ll give her morphine for the pain. She’ll need a pinch mixed with water every couple of hours. Morphine can only do so much.”

Marion wiped Allison’s brow with a cool cloth. “Can you tell how long ago the baby died?”

“Several weeks. She never would’ve gone into labor on her own. Sometimes the body makes its own rules. Mr. Bester is worried,” he said heading for the door.

“Before you get TJ, help me change these sheets. So much blood,” she said shaking her head. “Are you sure she’s going to recover?”
Please, don’t let her die.

“Physically she’ll recover quickly. It’ll be up to you and her husband to see she doesn’t let sadness take over.”

“She desperately wants children,” Marion said.

“And she will. Stay with her while I get TJ.”

Marion nodded and sat on the edge of the bed. “What are you going to do with the baby? You can’t leave him in here.”

The doctor picked up the tiny bundle. “I’ll put him in the other room.” The doctor left and Marion worked a clean sheet under Allison.

“I’m sorry,” Marion whispered to Allison when she saw tears start to trickle from the corner of her eyes. “I’m trying not to hurt you.”

“What did TJ say?” Allison’s voice was low and scratchy. “Is he angry?”

“Never. He didn’t say much. He’s worried about you.” She wiped Allison’s cheek with the cool cloth. “He knows the baby is gone.”

Allison’s whole body jerked as a fresh wave of tears flowed down her cheeks.

The door opened and TJ cautiously entered the room. Allison tried to turn away from him. She cried out in pain with the movement. Marion held the side of her face with her hand. “It’s his loss, too. Lean on each other.” She kissed Allison on the lips and stood from the bed.

She stopped in front of TJ and wrapped her arms around his neck. “She’s afraid you’re angry,” she whispered.

Marion stepped from the room and closed the door behind her. She leaned her head against the wall. Never had she been so afraid in her life. Allison had been close to dying. The doctor hadn’t had to say anything. Blood pooled on the bed so quickly that he hadn’t been prepared. His fingers had slipped several times while trying to remove the baby.

“Marion,” Train stood at the top of the stairs. He came looking for her when she didn’t return. After sharing the entire bottle with TJ, he was feeling unstable and didn’t want to be left alone in the kitchen. “Do you want to sit on the porch? I could use the fresh air.”

She put her hand on his arm. “I don’t know what to do. Right now Allison needs me and TJ needs you, so lets put our differences aside for a few more days.”

“And then what?” Not even the alcohol numbed the ache in his gut when he considered life without Marion. He couldn’t let her go back to Copper City any more than he could watch her consort with the men on the ranch.

“I don’t know.”

He followed her outside. As they sat on the swing and overlooked the property, Train used the heel of his foot to rock them back and forth. Men smoked and talked outside of the shack after a evening meal prepared by Cake. It had been a long afternoon, and now that it was quitting time, the din of the day was setting with the sun. Even the crisp late fall air, didn’t keep everyone from wanting to know about Allison and the baby. News spread like wildfire.

“All Allison ever wanted was to be a wife and mother,” Marion sadly said.

“The doctor told TJ she could still have children.”

Marion leaned her head back and closed her eyes. “I didn’t realize how much I wanted her to have the baby.”

Train waved as Charlie and a couple of the men passed close to the house. Charlie gave Marion a nod of acknowledgement. “Evening, ma’am,” the other gentleman said.

“How’s Sugar?” Charlie asked.

Marion squeezed Train’s fingers. “She lost the baby,” she said. “TJ is with her. The doctor says she’ll be fine in a few weeks.”

They nodded and kept walking.

“Why can’t living be easy?” She turned to Train. “Allison works so hard. It doesn’t seem fair.”

“Never does.”

Chapter Fifteen

Marion spent the next few days by Allison’s side making it possible for TJ to assume some of his duties to the ranch. Train stopped by, but she found a reason to leave the house while he visited. Until she made a decision, she couldn’t be near him. The sadness in his eyes was enough to make her come undone. What kind of life would they have if she had to prove her fidelity daily? She needed distance to think clearly.

The wind blew through the canyons bringing with it the taste of winter, the hollow sound reminiscent of the emptiness inside. She needed to reach some sort of resolution. Maybe it was time to talk to Train.

“Go home,” Allison said, gingerly moving to the kitchen table. “You’re both miserable. I’m capable of taking care of myself and TJ is close. Betty has the children. TJ is doing the housework. Actually, Marion, you’re underfoot. I want to rest, but I can’t because I know you’re here.”

Marion laughed. “I know you’re right. I’ll go home.”

“Is home with Train?”

“I hope so. I think I’ll go to the shack for lunch.” Marion went to find Train.

“Sunshine.” Cake came around the corner of the shack and stopped her before she went in. “It’s not a good day. Your husband doesn’t appreciate you out here all the time.” He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and gave her a squeeze.

“That’s only because he doesn’t know what I’m doing.”

“Then tell him.” He followed her into the shack.

“I will, soon,” she promised.

“It’s already been too long.” He gave her a smile with his criticism.

Marion saw Jack the moment she entered the building. Their eyes locked across the tables. “You look lovely today,” he said, approaching. He took her hand and brought it to his lips.

“You are a brave man, Jack,” she said with a sultry voice. “I believe my husband issued you a threat.” She pulled her fingers from his hand. “I wouldn’t take his threats too lightly.”

“Perhaps he misunderstood.” He nervously plucked the edge of his mustache.

She spoke so low he had to strain to hear her. “I’d rather bed Cake than be with you.” She turned her most charming smile to the man who had shown her nothing but kindness. Sweat stains under the arms and food stains across his belly from where he either dropped his lunch or wiped his hands, made him the perfect example of filthy. He usually reeked of body odor and his breath smelled like garlic and onion. Cake was unique.

“If you don’t repair my reputation,” she continued, eyes raking downward, “I’ll embellish your story.” She held up her finger and thumb indicating the rumor she’d spread about him and his inadequacies. “How would you like to be known as Jack rabbit, fastest man on the ranch?”

Jack’s eyes darkened and narrowed. “You’d cut off your nose to spite your face? I don’t think so. You’re too eager to dispel the rumors.”

“The damage has already been done. Tell the truth, Jack.” She stepped closer. “I’m sure in your arrogance you think Train is blowing smoke. I assure you, I am not.”

She turned away. A few men in the group gathered around Jack. She heard their laughter when she walked away.

“You’re playing a rough game, sunshine.”

“I know, Cake. But if I win, I get everything I want.” She tied on an apron. “What are we cooking today?”

“I thought it was time you tried fixing your husband’s favorite.” He pointed his pudgy finger at her. “On one condition. You take it out to him this afternoon. No more sneaking around. I’ve loved that boy my whole life and I can’t stand the thought of him out there sulking all afternoon.”

She gave him a salute. “I don’t want to see him hurting either.”

Later in the day, Marion approached the house without a sound. She watched Train drive a post into the ground to form a paddock for him to work the new horses. His shirt was hanging on one of the completed posts. She shivered. It was too cold, yet Train didn’t appear bothered. Beads of perspiration trickled down his back as he lifted the giant hammer and gave the stump a resounding whack.

She pulled her coat tight and sat beside the picnic basket on the porch. Her lips twitched while her breath created a fog in front of her face in the chilled air. He was ignoring her and she knew it. There was no way he couldn’t smell the mouth-watering aroma of Cake’s fried chicken. Actually, her fried chicken. Cake had shown her how to make the breading and the trick to keeping the chicken from becoming too oily, another recipe for her notebook.

“Are you going to talk to me?”

Train dropped the hammer to the ground and turned around. His chest rose and fell from exertion. He ran his fingers through his hair, then put his hat back on. He took his flannel shirt from the post and slipped his arms into the sleeves.

“I brought lunch, and a confession.”

“I don’t want to hear it.” He picked the hammer up. “I’m not going to alleviate you of your guilty conscience.”

She carried the basket and set it on the post. He stopped his swing before he demolished the lunch. “I don’t need to clear my conscience. I confess I made the lunch. It’s not as good as Cake’s. Train, I have spent every day for weeks learning how to cook. Added to what Allison taught me, I’m trying to be a good wife.” She dropped her hands from the basket, waiting for him to look in.

He hesitated, frowning.

“Go on.”

He peered inside and took a chicken leg.

“Allison has taught me everything from making soap to getting wheel grease out of your shirts. Believe me, I’m not looking forward to the task.”

He took a bite of the chicken leg, chewed while staring at her, his expression changing from questioning to surprise.

She handed him the canteen. “It’s fresh lemonade.” She held them out for his inspection. “I put up with Jack and the other men laughing at everything I burned. I took a bit of pleasure when they ate the cookies I made with baking soda instead of flour.

“Train, the only thing heating up in the shack is me at the stove. I swear it. Ask Cake if you don’t believe me. I asked our friends not to say anything because I wanted to surprise you.”

Train put the canteen on top of the basket. “Why?” His one simple word asked more than he could possibly imagine. She had been asking herself the same question every day as she burned her fingers on the stove or cut her thumb while trying to slice bacon thin enough to fry.

Her heart rate increased. Grabbing the post, she tried to balance against the spinning in her head. “Because,” she said quietly. “I can only show you how I feel. I can’t say the words.” Tears filled her eyes and spilled onto her cheeks. “Please understand,” she pleaded. “My actions show you how I feel. I want to be your wife.” She couldn’t finish the rest of what she wanted to say.

“And admit you have a problem, too, Train. You tell me you love me, but you don’t show it. You don’t trust me, and worse, you believe everyone else before you believe me.”

“I’m sorry, Marion.”

“Don’t apologize. Saying you’re sorry doesn’t mean anything if you keep making the same mistake. Look at me. Do you see your wife, or do you see a whore? I can’t be both.”

Train threaded his fingers with hers and grabbed the picnic basket. “Yes you can.” They walked in silence for a minute.

“There used to be a little fishing shack that had been converted into a one room house over there.” He pointed to a spot not far from the bank of the lake. “It’s where I grew up. My dad was great with cattle, but didn’t know a thing about providing for a wife and child. He was an old man when he married my mother. Worked for the Bester’s his entire life. When he decided to bring home a wife, TJ’s daddy, everyone called him Bud, told him to raise his family on the ranch. My mother was already expecting me when he moved her into the little house. He died a few years after I was born. I don’t remember much about him.

“I do remember Sunday afternoons. My mother ushered me out the door and told me to go find TJ. I was five, but I understood it meant that Bud was on his way over.”

Marion took the picnic basket from him as they settled under a tree and looked out over the lake. The wind rippled the waters. “She was having an affair with TJ’s father?”

Train nodded. “TJ was old enough to know exactly what was going on. His father’s activities were no mystery. Bud liked women. He loved his wife, but always had room for one more in his bed.”

“He saw Sandy when he was alive. She once told me the apple didn’t fall far from the tree when it came to TJ,” Marion said.

“She was wrong. TJ never used women the way his father did. I suppose that’s why TJ doesn’t like his business discussed. He’s been hard on me the last couple of months. I’ve let myself become too emotional.”

“He didn’t want you to marry me?” She had always been a fair judge of character. She couldn’t believe her intuition could be that far off when it came to TJ.

“TJ has absolutely no reservations about you. He’s worried about me.” He took a deep breath and put his hand over hers. “TJ is my half brother. My mother was a whore in town. Joseph got her in the family way and wanted to have a small part in raising his bastard, his namesake.”

“If she was a whore how did she know he was the one who fathered you?” She took a piece of chicken from the basket.

“Once Bud came into her life she was exclusive to him. He planned it from the beginning. Set my dad up to take responsibility. I guess that’s why he was never around. He knew I wasn’t his. By then it was too late. He knew my mother and Joseph Bester were lovers.

“TJ felt sorry for me knowing we were brothers, and that Bud would never openly acknowledge it. One day he heard his mother crying and she confessed it all. Told him someday it would be up to him to make it right with me.”

“That’s why TJ gave you this land.”

Train nodded.

“Why are you telling me this?” She wiped her mouth on a napkin, but her eyes never wavered. They remained locked on Train’s. Somehow, they both knew this was the crossroads of their marriage.

“Because my mother never lived with the man she devoted her life to. She remained his mistress until she died. I guess Bud was good to her if you call Sunday afternoons a relationship.” He took out his tobacco pouch and rolled a cigarette. “I was ten when TJ told me we were brothers. After that I pitied my mother.”

“And you pitied me?” She took the cigarette from him. “It doesn’t work to pity someone who isn’t unhappy.”

“You’re right. I did go looking for a whore to rescue.”

Her hand moved to cover his. “You found one. I don’t want to leave. I want to be your wife. I was too stupid to know I was unhappy.”

“I don’t want to change you.” He ran his hand along the fabric of her dress. “This is what I want.”

“What about the good, little wife that cooks and cleans?” She took his hand and moved it up her body.

“Only if you want.”

“I only know how to be a whore.”

“Good, when I come home for lunch I want to find my wife partially dressed and waiting for me.” He slid his hand inside her coat and under her dress, caressing her shoulder. “You’re trembling.” Now that he wasn’t swinging a heavy hammer, the cold got to him, too. He shivered. “Let’s go in.”

Marion picked up the picnic basket. “I’m not going to stop going to the shack.”

“Then we’ll continue to fight about it.” They stepped into the warm coziness of their little house.

“I’ll make you forgive me.” Her dress dropped to the floor.