Crown of Steel (Chaos Awakens) (9 page)

"Don't call me that!” Haley snapped with a venomous hiss. She flinched from her own anger before she forced herself to speak more calmly. “That was Xan's thing.” She said in the way of a half-formed explanation. “I never really liked it.” That wasn't true. She'd liked it when Xandrith called her that, but it just agitated her to hear it from Kassa.

"I'm sorry. Sometimes the parts of Xandrith left inside my head get the better of me.” She said quietly. “I know where I stop and he starts, but it's so close. The memories are layered, but nothing is clear. It's all strange fragments, impressions.”

"Yeah, well, at least you've got something left of him.” Haley replied bitterly.

Kassa's brow furrowed. “What exactly does that mean?” Haley had gone too far. She was embarrassed and more than a little angry with herself.

She stood up and walked to the door. “I'm going out to gather some more wood. I'll be back in a bit.” She exited the hut without another word, eager to be away from the older woman. She hated the way that conversation had gone. She had fought and helped kill a sciarwolf. It had been terrifying, but she'd never felt as vulnerable as she did when the topic of conversation came around to Xandrith. This was especially true with Kassa. Her strange bond to the assassin was infuriating. Kassa sometimes even acted exactly like Xan, which was unnerving on top of being infuriating.

Xandrith had given parts of himself to the woman in order to piece her fragmented spirit back together and return her to life. Kassa was still herself, but those parts of Xandrith came out far too often. Haley wasn't sure if she should have taken solace in the familiarity of those moments or not, but the exact opposite usually occurred. Kassa's casual use of Xandrith's familiar ways only served to make the younger woman miss him more, and missing him made her angry on several levels.

The assassin's apprentice made an attempt to gather a few pieces of scrap wood even though there was no real need to do so. She'd only really left the hut to get away from anymore awkward conversations with Kassa. Wood was sparse and difficult to find, but Haley made herself stay out in the cold until she had an arm full of spindly sticks to bring back in. She was just turning to make her way back to the hut when a deep howl sounded in the darkness, like a wolf but with far more depth to the call. Haley had never heard anything quite like it before. It sent a chill down her spine. She increased her pace back to the hut. She was suddenly acutely aware of just how dark the day was getting, and how difficult it was to see far ahead through the snow.

By the time she reached the hut she was moving at a steady run. She'd lost a few bits of wood on the way, but she hardly cared. When she came through the front door of the cabin Kassa was sitting at the far end of the room with her sword drawn and sitting across her lap. She looked relieved as Haley entered. Lines of worry eased from her face and she let out a long sigh.

"Did you hear them?” She asked, and Haley answered with a quick nod.

"I heard them, or one of them, or whatever ...” She wasn't sure exactly what she'd heard. “What was it?”

"It sounded like werewolves. I've heard a couple calls over the last few minutes. One of them is close, the others are really far away, but it's not good. This hut might be their camp. We could be right in the middle of their territory.”  Kassa stood up and walked to the door. She dropped a heavy crossbar in place across the gap between the jam and door itself, locking it closed.

"Don't you think we should get out of here?” Haley asked, suddenly eager to be back out in the cold and moving as far away from this place as she could get that night.

Wolf-masked-Kassa tilted her head to one side quizzically. “Do you really want to run through unfamiliar territory at night when it's full of were-creatures who are familiar with the area?”

Haley felt a wave of embarrassment flash through her. Kassa was right. Running out into the woods at night was suicide, even if they were prepared for traveling through snow and ice. All normal risks aside, were-creatures were stronger beneath the light of the moon. Of course, if the hut they were stealing the use of belonged to the werewolves they were in danger either way. The building didn't have any windows they could have used to keep watch to see if something was coming, and there was only one door. Everything Haley knew about tactics told her that the hut was not a safe place to be.

"No, I don't, but we're trapped here. If they come for us we have nowhere to run.” Haley answered only half plaintively. They were in a situation with no clear solutions.

"We're not going to run.” Kassa answered nonchalantly. “If they attack, we'll fight and kill them. You and Xandrith killed a sciarwolf by yourselves. Werewolves are dangerous, but not that dangerous. The two of us should be able to fight off anything that attacks.”

Haley wasn't convinced. “What if one of us is bitten or scratched?”

Kassa shrugged. “We patch it up when the fight is done.”

"I don't want to end up a werewolf!” Haley snapped, deciding that Kassa wasn't taking the hint. To the younger girl’s surprise, Kassa just broke out in amused laughter.

"That's not how it works, Haley. I thought you were above old superstitions.” She finally got the words out as the laughter subsided.

Haley frowned. “Then where do were-creatures come from?”

Kassa raised an eyebrow. “Do I really need to explain to you the mating rituals of werewolves?”

Haley's jaw dropped. “Mating ... then they, wait, but ...”

Kassa just shook her head in amusement. “Is it really that surprising? Humans are born from humans, and werewolves, bears, panthers and the other cursed blood creature are born from their fellows. The blood tends to run weak in them. If they mate with a human, generally the human blood runs true, but occasionally a half-breed ends up cursed with the were-blood.”

Haley scrunched up her face in consternation. “You know an awful lot about this.”

"I was a watch captain. Were-creatures were one of the threats we faced sometimes. I've talked to quite a few of them over the years. In their human form they're just like any of us, though I think you can always see their feral side shining through a bit. Some of them wish they didn't have the blood, but others are prideful and arrogant about their curse. When they're under the influence of the change they can't restrain their base instincts, and were-creatures consider all other life fair prey. King's law demands their blood upon identification. If you have the misfortune of being born to two cursed parents, then your life is forfeit automatically.”

Haley thought about that for a moment, and then her eyes opened wide in shock. “Does that mean you killed babies, children?”

Kassa stiffened, her eyes looking anywhere but at Haley. “I had a job to do.” Her expression was pained. “Xan always said I was a good person. He never knew the truth.”

The younger woman wasn't sure what to say. Before Xan had vanished she'd been training to be an assassin, so how could she judge Kassa for doing a job that might have saved the lives of several people in the long run? There was no cure for the cursed blood of were-creatures. Those children would have grown up to be dangerous to society at some point, and Haley might very well find herself in the same position if she followed through in becoming an assassin. Xandrith had tried to explain to her the cost of an assassin's life on a few different occasions, but this was the first time the implications of what she might be called on to do in the future really sank in. Haley had always envisioned herself putting an end to bad men and corrupt senators, but that wasn't the whole truth of what an assassin really was. There would be times when she would need to take the lives of innocent people, maybe even women and children. Those children might mean the world no more harm than had her own brother and sister before they were murdered by the man who'd stolen Haley's life and honor.

You've worked so hard to come this far. Are you really going to begin doubting your choices now?
Her internal voice quipped.
What kind of future does a girl like you have if you're not strong? You're ugly and used up. No one can ever love you as you are now. You owe it to yourself to become as strong as you can so you are able to cut out your own place in this world. You can be shunned, or you can be feared.
They were dark thoughts, but could Haley really deny their truth? Who would ever accept her as she was now? Even Xandrith didn't feel for her the way she felt for him. No, Haley shook her head fiercely. That was no way to think. Xandrith would have been angry at her for that entire line of reasoning.
But he abandoned you.
That voice inside her head pressed forth again, and immediately her attempted surge of optimism faltered.
He abandoned me after he'd promised he would be there.
She thought, and her heart fell, feeling like a leaden weight in her chest. That was the hardest truth to accept. Xandrith had promised he'd take care of her, but he'd left her behind.

Kassa seemed to notice the void in the conversation. “I didn't mean to darken the conversation so much. I just ... I have regrets. I think everyone does.”

Haley turned her back on the older woman. “Let's not talk anymore tonight.” Kassa probably thought that Haley didn't want to speak to her anymore because of what she'd done to the were-creatures in the past, but the younger woman simply couldn't bring herself to continue any conversation. Her own musings had brought her to a dark emotional place and she was afraid that if she spoke anymore her pain would get away from her. She wasn't going to cry in front of Kassa. She wasn't going to cry in front of anyone anymore. The last time she'd cried had been when Xandrith had vanished, and she wasn't going to do it again. No one was ever allowed to see her that vulnerable again.

The hut fell into a state of uneasy silence punctuated only by the steadily increasing wind beyond the rickety wooden walls pulling at the tiny building and making it creak and groan in protest. Kassa eventually fell asleep with her sword across her lap, but Haley couldn't make herself drift off. Her mind ran in unending circles and her body felt tense and sore. Her burns seemed to ache more than normal as well.

The burns didn't bleed constantly anymore like they had a few months before, but they never stopped hurting. Pain was a part of life for Haley. Suffering was a daily chore. While she kept her axe close at hand the pain was lessened, but when she put it aside to train without it, which she tried to do every day, the burns covering most of her body flared back up viciously. The taunt skin pulled with every twist and turn, and the damaged nerves protested against her every motion. The trick to dealing with it was simply to push it from her mind. When she was training she would concentrate on her technique and her style. Pain was only a limiting factor if Haley let it become so, and she had no intention of being defeated by her own body.

A particularly strong gust of wind tore around the hut, it shook the wooden walls and setting the pots, pans, and tools to rattling where they hung along the walls. The sudden cacophony of noise put Haley on edge. What outside sounds might be covered up by the noise from inside? It was a frightening thought. The wind passed and the world went quiet again. At least the hut was well enough designed that some of the wind didn't come through the walls. It wasn't quite as bad as sleeping outside.

A scratching sound from the rear of the cabin snapped Haley's thoughts from where they’d strayed. She spun around immediately to face the back wall as the sound dragged along the outside of the cabin, sliding along the wall as though someone was walking the perimeter of the hut with their dagger scraping along next to them. The sound trailed it’s way all the way around the cabin from the back wall and stopped just before the door. Something heavy pressed against the door. The door leaned into the cabin, pushing against the crossbar, and then the pressure was gone.

Haley leaned down next to Kassa. “Something's here.” She whispered quietly, shaking the older woman's shoulder. Kassa snapped awake as though she'd never been fully asleep, her eyes looking immediately alert and awake.

"What is it?” She asked in a barely audible whispered as she stood up carefully and brought her sword to bear.

Haley very quickly and quietly explained what she'd heard and seen.

"They might be teasing us, trying to see if we'll come outside on our own.” Kassa said, but she didn't seem sure of herself.

Silence was upon them again. It lasted so long that Haley was afraid Kassa might be beginning to doubt what she'd been told, but just as Haley was about to open her mouth to insist she'd really seen and heard what she'd reported to Kassa, the scratching sound started again. This time it came from two distinct places on the exterior wall, and both traced around to the front door. There was no gentle pressure on the door this time. Instead, something with an amazing amount of strength smashed into the wooden frame. The wood groaned and partially splintered in protest, and then the cabin was wrapped in silence.

The sudden slam on the door nearly caused Haley to jump out of her skin. She hadn't been expecting that at all. She was holding her axe in one hand and the knife that Xan had given her in the other, though she could hardly remember exactly when she'd drawn her weapons.

"Can they break the door down?” Haley asked as quietly as she could.

Kassa's answer came in the form of a noncommittal shrug that did little to ease Haley's nerves. The scratching and the banging stopped as quickly as it had begun and a terrible quiet seeped into the tiny hut. Neither of the women dared move lest they make some noise that would stir the threat outside, and other than the sound of the wind no noise came from beyond the walls.

"They're probably trying to lure us into coming out to see if they're still out there.
”
Kassa whispered softly. “I think we should just remain in here until ...” She didn't get a chance to finish that thought. The rear wall of the hut exploded inward as though struck by a battering ram. Wood shrapnel and a terrifyingly large and black object crashed into the room, throwing furniture and supplies in every single direction. Kassa dodged to one side of the small space and Haley attempted to do the same in the opposite direction, but she'd misgauged the amount of space to the wall and she slammed into it as she attempted to stand clear of the sudden chaos. She hit her left shoulder hard against the wall and dropped the knife Xandrith had given her before stumbling to the ground awkwardly. She panicked as she heard the dagger hit the floor. Everything else was forgotten as she crawled across the floor trying to find her knife.