Cursed Hearts (A Crossroads Novel) (53 page)

“I
don’t know if I can stop,” he said.

“…Maybe
we shouldn’t.”

Their eyes met and Rome stared back at her unblinkingly.
Maybe this
was
right. Maybe he was just scared. After all, he didn’t
really know what
he
was doing. And what if this was the last chance they had to be together? What
if he didn’t survive the night? Even the best laid plans can crumble to dust, and
what Rome had was a half-cocked theory. Even he knew it sounded like a disaster
waiting to happen. The odds of him walking away from this the same, let alone
alive—it would be a miracle. “Are you sure?” he asked. He caressed her cheek
lovingly. “I want you, but if you’re not ready…”

“Life
doesn’t happen when you’re ready,” Ariahna replied. Rome’s fingers curled
around her neck as he pressed a gentle kiss to her lips. But it was his other hand,
the one sliding up the inside of her thigh that was driving
her wild. Every inch of skin he touched left her
tingling. She wanted him, but
it was more than that. “I need you,” she
said.

Rome
pulled away, hovering only inches from her pink lips.  He was
enjoying the subtle, yet intimate feeling of her
breath as it washed over him. It
was quite possible that he only had one
shot to get this right. The last thing he wanted to do was rush it. “I want you
to remember this, all of this. I want you to remember me. I want to know that I
made a difference, that I mattered. I need you to know how much I love you – that
I’d do anything for you.” Rome felt like he was staling, and on some level, he
was. He couldn’t consciously understand that
he
was the one that wasn’t
ready for this. This was more than sex; it was a bond neither of them could
even begin to comprehend.

Ariahna
stared into Rome’s blue eyes, slipping her hands down his
chest, lower and lower until bright flecks of gold
were staring back at her.
Her fingers were playing at the skin just
above his jeans. “Please,” she begged. The closer she got to this moment, the
more terrified she was that it would disappear—that she’d lose him—that he’d
slip through her fingers and float away. “We don’t have a lot of time,” she
whispered.

“We
have enough.”

What
they didn’t have was
good
timing. Aria slipped her hand into his pants,
causing him to lean the weight of his body against her. Their only warning was
a soft creaking sound before the entire kissing booth collapsed beneath them.
Rome crashed down on top of her, doing his best to protect her and not crush
her at the same time. When it was all over, the two of them were lying in a
pile of rotted wood. The carnival had painted it a nice shade of pink to hide
its age, for all the good it had done them. Then again, its
intended use was something far less… strenuous.
Rome couldn’t help but feel
like this was their first kiss all over
again.

“I
think the world’s trying to tell us something,” he scoffed. They were both left
shaking their heads in disbelief, laughing until it actually seemed funny. Rome
helped her to her feet, pulling her into his arms. She pressed her cheek to his
chest and it reminded him what this day was really about. It reminded him what
was important. “It seems like everything is always going by so fast, even as we
fight to slow it down. Maybe the only way to hold on is to—”

“Let
go?” she said.

“No,”
he breathed. “Believe. The only way we’re going to get through this is to
believe that we can.”

“…Christian
told you, didn’t he?”

Rome
nodded reluctantly. “I’m not going to let you die.”

“There’s
little we can do to stop it.”

“You
could give me the wand. You don’t have to do this.”
I’ll do it for you
,
he thought. “Just give me the wand. We’ll find another way.”

“And
in the meantime, you’ll die while we’re looking for our fabled ‘better way’,”
she said bitterly, pulling away from him and taking a few
steps
off in another direction. “I’m not
having it.”

Rome
followed, staying a few paces behind. “Your life’s more important than mine
will ever be. I was a mistake. In the grand scheme of things, I’m nothing,” he
said.

“That’s not true,” she said, turning to gaze at him
fiercely. “You mean
everything
to me. In my eyes, you are the most important thing in the world. Meaning
something to someone makes you precious, and you are precious to me. I protect
what I love.”

“So
do I. That’s why I’m taking your place. I’m giving my magic to the yew tree and
ending this curse, even if it’s the last thing I do. Maybe with a little bit of
luck, my wolf will keep me alive. But it has to be me. It’s the only way you’re
going to get that happy ending, and I want that for you.” Rome didn’t think someone
should be able to look that hurt and angry at the same time. “Maybe this is
what I was meant to do.”

“You’re
being such a…
boy
. You think you have to save me, that I can’t do
anything on my own. I’m scared, but I’m not a coward.”

“I
never—”

“I’m not finished,” Aria said softly. “Why do you think I
didn’t
want to
tell you? I knew you’d go and do
something stupid.”

“I
prefer brave,” he smiled. Ariahna didn’t seem amused. “Then why did you tell
Christian, weren’t you afraid he’d do something stupid?”

“He’s
not like you,” she said. “No matter what he says, he wouldn’t run into a
burning building to save me.” Rome clenched his jaw. “I’m sorry, I forgot that
your house—”

“—burnt
down? It’s fine. And that’s not true, Christian loves you. He’s just young.”

“We’re
the same age. Do you think I’m ‘young’?”

“I
didn’t mean—are we fighting?”

“No,”
she said stubbornly.

Rome
sighed. “He loves you just the same as I do.”

“Part
of me wants to believe that, but just because I want something doesn’t make it
true. I have to keep reminding myself that he’s a smooth talker and a pretty
face. You love me regardless of the curse,” she said, “he loves me because of it.”

“He
hurt you, and you’re scared. I’m not saying you should forget, I’m just saying
that maybe you should forgive him.” Rome took Ariahna’s hand as she wiped away
what might have been the beginning of tears.

“I
already forgave him.”

“…I
think he’s going to surprise you,” Rome said, “but only if you give him the
chance.”

She
looked away. They were both hardheaded, and clearly arguing about who was going
to die for the other wasn’t going to get them anywhere. She had the wand, and
that was all that mattered.

“Rome?”

“Hmm?”

“Will
you go on the carousel with me?”

“Only if I get to sit on that wicked looking dragon,” he
smirked. They
smiled
at one another and raced towards the ride. She beat him by a mile. “Jeez, where
did you learn to run so damn fast?”

“I
don’t know. I was on the track team last year? I’m sorry, obviously that was a
rhetorical question.” He smiled and scooped her off her feet, whisking her over
to the bench.

“How
about we sit together?” he said.

She
nodded, resting happily in his lap. She snapped her fingers and
the carousel rallied to life. The lights and soft
music carried them well into the darkness. Daylight had long since faded into
dusk, giving way to stars in the
beautiful night sky. They’d watched the
sunset in silence, wondering if they’d live to see it rise in the morning. She
was lying on top of him now, tracing circles in his chest with her fingers.

“What’s
it like?” Rome asked.

“Being
happy?” she smirked. “I don’t know. I have to admit it’s all fairly new to me.”

He
couldn’t help but smile. “I meant what’s it like being a nahual? I would give
anything to have your control. It’s a constant struggle for me, and the fact
that you can shift without pain…”

She
sighed.
She wasn’t sure she wanted
to answer; he probably wouldn’t like what she had to say anyways. “I’m sure it’s
going to sound selfish or ungrateful, but… it’s not as great as you might
think. My ability was something I developed out of necessity. At first, it was
just one more thing I thought I could impress my father with.”

She bit her lip, choosing her next words
carefully.

“I guess I thought that he might finally be pleased,
or proud of me. But I started to realize I was never going to make him happy.
It was never, ever going to be enough. And when I was finally successful, it
wasn’t
something I wanted to share anymore. I
just wanted something to myself that he couldn’t take.” She closed her mouth,
grinding her teeth together. “And yet
it’s nearly as suffocating as it
is freeing, because I can’t just change
whenever
I want. I’m always worried about getting caught. But it’s something
that’s
kept me safe, given me a way out, when I needed it. And I just—I can’t lose
that.” She was digging fingernails into her skin, terrified that she was
sharing any of this with someone – even Rome.

“He’s an idiot if he’s not proud of you. You’re smart, and
beautiful,
and you have the kindest heart
I’ve ever seen. You’re the type of person that
could change the world,”
he said whimsically.

“I’m none of those things,” she blushed. “You’re
just trying to flatter
me, and your opinion is clearly biased.”

“I would never lie about something like that.
I’ll always give it to you straight, even if I think it’s something you might
find hard to hear. It’s just the
way I am,” Rome said. “Even my wolf can sense it. That’s why I
think it wants you so bad. It’s attracted to your power.”

“Well it’s going to be attracted to a very old tree as of tomorrow
morning,” she quipped.

Rome exhaled, smiling at her. “Your power doesn’t come from your
magic. It’s a part of you, but it’s not who you are.”

“My wolf comes from my magic,” she said.

“I could make you like me,” he whispered. “It wouldn’t be the
same, but you’d be strong. You’d be able to hear a pin drop and smell the rain
long before it fell – and that’s just as a human. I guess you wouldn’t be an
alpha though, and it’s just as dangerous as the secret you have now, if not more
so. Then again, you can’t have the good without the bad, right?”

“Can I ask you something?”

“Yeah, of course. You don’t have to ask if you can ask me
something,”
he smiled, “you can just ask
it.”

“…If I asked you to stay away from him, would you?”

“Who?”

“Kaleb,” Aria said.

Rome cleared his throat.

“I thought—I mean—what are you asking?”

“I’m just worried about you… And maybe I’m a little jealous,” she
admitted, “but I don’t have a good feeling about him.”

“You don’t even know him.”

“I know that. I just want you to be careful.”

“Aria, what about me makes you think I could even
be
careful? I drive like a lunatic and yell at people holding firearms. Not to
mention I leap under objects that intend to crush me. I fell in love with you
knowing all too well how that was, and still is, likely to end. But I did it
because I wanted to, because it was my choice. And yes, I’m friends with the
one person who could kill me in my sleep, but—he saved my life. You can call me
stubborn or
stupid if you want, but the
truth is I learn things the hard way, because I know anything easy isn’t worth fighting
for.”

“…I can’t decide if you’re wise, or just crazy,” she sighed.

“Probably both,” he said.

“And you’re more than friends…”

“I’ll admit, the dynamic is a bit out of my comfort zone.”

“Are you in love with him?”

“What?” he breathed. “No, I’m not…
in love with him
.”

“Then…”

Rome sighed heavily. “I was insane to think
something like
that could work in the first place, wasn’t I?” Aria answered that
question with a single look. “But what about you and Christian? Aren’t you two
dating?”

“We’re not
really
dating.”

“Does he know that? …Look, I’m in love with you and I want to be
with you. I’ll tell him we can’t—that we’re not—” Why was this so hard to say? “I’ll
end it, but you can’t ask me not to be friends with him. I can’t do that. It’s
not fair, to either of us.”

“I don’t want him feeding off of you,” she said timidly.

“…I know.” Rome’s head shot to the side when
he heard the
distinct sound of jingling keys. He watched the guard stumble
towards what he realized was a very lit, very noisy carousel. “We’ve got to get
out of here.”

Ariahna nearly screamed when Rome flipped them over onto the
floor. His fingers instinctually clamped over her mouth, signaling with his
other hand towards the Hall of Mirrors. She shook her head fervently. She’d
rather be caught by the guard than step foot in there.