Damned and Desperate (29 page)

The king stuck out his neck before banging his club on the ground. “Nephilim make them dead spiders.” Then he nodded at Jack. “Take dog to Heaven before it too late.”

Too late for what? But I suspected I already knew. I’d had enough of Hell to last me an eternity. If I had to retrieve Jack from level five, I would, but I honestly never wanted to visit this shithole again. Aedan whistled and waved Boner and the others over. “We need to leave.”

Aedan set Jack inside the elevator, and then he wished himself smaller. Voila! He was still my big and beefy boyfriend, only a much more manageable size.

Shadow and Callum landed beside us. “We’re going to stay and help the Nephilim,” Callum said.

I guessed Shadow and Callum were bosom buddies. Weird. I was just glad Shadow was batting for our team now.

Aedan grabbed my hand, pulling me into the elevator. We were followed by Boner, Mar, and Katherine. Sarge floated in and took his place beside me. I worried Aedan would say something, but it’s not like he had any reason to be jealous over a spirit.

I held my breath as the elevator dinged every few seconds, a woman’s smooth voice announcing each level. Would Katherine be allowed to continue?

I shouldn’t have been surprised when the elevator stopped at sub-level one. “Elevator temporarily suspended. Katherine Murphy O’Connor, entry to Purgatory denied.” The gleaming red door opened with a hiss, revealing the dining hall inside the Nephilim’s pyramid. “Please exit now.”

Mar cried out, pressing Katherine against her bosom while Boner wrapped his arms around both of them. Katherine’s snake hissed as it slithered down her back, but thankfully, it didn’t attempt to bite anyone.

Sure, I’d questioned God’s judgment calls before, but I totally understood why he wouldn’t give Katherine a pass. I’d been relieved when she spit in Mar’s wound, but not even that act of kindness could atone for a century of psychotic bitchiness.

I didn’t want to be the bad guy, but my dog was looking weaker by the second. Though I was moved by this family crisis, I was sorely tempted to give Katherine a hard shove out the elevator door. I placed a hand on Jack’s eerily still chest, unable to tell if he was breathing.

“Please exit now,” the elevator voice chimed again, this time a little more forceful.

Mar tugged Katherine’s hand. “Come on, sweetheart.”

Aedan stuck out an arm, blocking Mar from leaving. “Hang on. You can’t go out there.”

A spark of determination danced in Mar’s eyes as she wagged a finger in Aedan’s face. “Like hell I can’t. I’m not leaving my daughter.”

“Mar,” I gasped. “You really want to spend eternity in Hell?”

I had to admit, I was starting to like Mar. The thought of her suffering in the fiery pit of doom didn’t sit well with me. In fact, it made my stomach bunch up in a knot, the kind of knot that made me think I’d gorged on a platter-full of wheat brownies.

Mar threw up her hands. “What else do I have to do in Heaven all day but sit around and eat cheesecake? I will not be happy without her.” She flashed a warm smile at Katherine before wrapping an arm around her shoulder. “I’m staying here.”

Boner neighed before clomping after them. “I’m going, too.”

Awww, shit. How did I know Boner would say that?

They each transformed into their human forms when they stepped off the platform. Katherine grasped the back of her head. “My baby!”

“It’s okay, darling.” Mar pulled Katherine to her chest, letting her cry on her shoulder.

Ewww. I couldn’t say I’d miss Katherine’s snake. Not one bit.

“I’ll stay with them, too. They’ll probably need backup.” My heart clenched when Sarge floated off the elevator. I was relieved when he regained his flesh and bones, but I wasn’t happy about the idea of him staying in Hell, and no, it wasn’t because I had feelings for him. Well, not
those
kind of feelings.

Boner puffed up his chest, beaming. “Thanks, Sarge.”

Sarge grasped Boner by the shoulder, before his gaze swept to us. “No, thank you, for risking your souls to help free me. I’ve never known such a dark desperation and depression as the short time I was in the dragon’s stomach.” His voice cracked as his eyes glazed over. “I couldn’t imagine an eternity of such torture.”

My throat tightened at the thought of losing a friend to such a horrible fate, but now they were all leaving us to stay on sub-level one! Then this crazy idea struck me. I doubted the Nephilim would want to stay in Hell now that God had given them permission to come to Heaven.

I waved a hand at the empty dining hall. “Maybe they can stay in the pyramid.” At least I hoped they could stay there. It was as close to Heaven as they were going to get, and I’d feel a lot less guilty enjoying Heavenly cheesecake knowing my friends weren’t suffering in a pit of fire.

Katherine turned to us, panic in her eyes. “What will they do when they find me here?”

Aedan’s shoulders fell. “I don’t know, Katherine. After what you did to their kin….” He pointed to the ceiling. “If God didn’t forgive you, I doubt they will.”

“She will be safe here. I will make sure of it.”

Cam flew down from the rafters, landing gracefully on the polished stone floor.

“Cam!” I yelled, throwing up my hands. If anyone could negotiate a truce with the giants, he could.

“Mind if I hitch a ride with you?” Cam tucked his wings behind him as he stepped inside. “I’ll be back down before the Nephilim return.” He looked at Jack. “Your guardian is injured.”

I answered with a nod, suddenly too choked up to speak.

Cam clasped a hand on my shoulder. “Don’t worry. We shall heal him.”

I bit down on my knuckles, choking on a sob. That was the best damn news I’d heard all day.

“Look after Mar, okay?” Aedan called to Boner.

Boner flashed a smug grin. “Always, dude.” He saluted Aedan before the doors shut. “See you later.”

As soon as I was settled beside Jack, Aedan asked the elevator to bring us to Heaven. As soon as we hit level two of Purgatory, Jack transformed from a two-headed beast to the black Lab from my childhood. Aedan and I returned to normal, too. Thank God. Those wings were starting to wear down my shoulders. It was much easier to wrap my arms around Jack in my human form. I hugged him to my chest, but Jack didn’t so much as whimper or wag his tail.

The trip to the top seemed to take forever. I begged Jack to stay strong as we slowly passed floor after floor. Despite my best efforts to rouse him, Jack was deathly still.

Please, God. Please heal my best friend.

Cam helped Aedan lift Jack and carry him through the Pearly Gates. I kept thinking,
This is it. Jack will be healed any minute.
But he was still as a statue when they laid him on the sofa in my Penthouse living room. It felt like ages since I’d last been to my beautiful home in Heaven, though I knew it had only been days.

“Jackie,” I breathed against his neck as I coated his fur with hot tears. “Please wake up.”

“Here, let me,” Cam said as he knelt beside me. He held a hand out to Aedan, wagging his fingers. “My star, please?”

Aedan sighed as he slowly pulled the star over his head and handed it to Cam. “This thing sure came in handy down there,” he said.

Cam smiled. “I bet it did, but Jack has greater use of it now.”

Cam wrapped the cord around Jack’s neck, pressing the star against his furry heart while placing a hand over Jack’s eyes. “Dear Lord,” Cam prayed. “Please make your loyal guardian whole again.”

I expected Jack to jump up from the sofa and coat my face in sloppy kisses, but I was filled with a mixture of awe and disappointment when he transformed into a naked man instead. Luckily, he was curled up in a fetal position, so I didn’t see anything other than his mop of hair and shaggy beard. Was my guardian a hobo?

Cam draped a blanket over the man. “Sit up, Mr. Murphy. Meet your daughter.”

Mr. Murphy! My dad! The man who’d abandoned me was Jack?

My dad’s chest heaved as he panted, his tongue falling out of his mouth.

Worry lines traced Cam’s eyes. “Sometimes, guardians lose their human memories.” He shook my dad’s shoulder. “Mr. Murphy, you’re not a dog anymore. Don’t you remember? Your daughter, Ashley, is here.”

All time seemed to stand still; the only sound in the room was the heavy thumping of my heart banging out a staccato in my ears.

The man sat up and rubbed his eyes. “I remember,” he mumbled.

It was only then that I expelled a pent up breath of apprehension.

Cam smiled as he clutched the star in his hand. “I’m sorry, but I need to return to the pyramid.”

I was barely aware of Cam walking out the door as I sank back on my heels.

My dad’s green eyes sparkled as he smiled at me. “Hello, sweetheart.”

My voice tightened as I struggled to speak. “Dad? I thought you walked out on us.” I’d had no idea my guardian doggie was really my father. Consider my mind blown. Really blown.

His shoulders slumped as he frowned. “I know I did. I had inoperable brain cancer, and I didn’t want my family to see me suffer.”

“What?” My hand flew to my throat as I recalled what my mom had told me when I was finally old enough to wonder why other kids had dads and I didn’t. She said he’d walked out on us and it was too painful for her to speak of him. That was the last time I asked her about him, though I had tried to get more information out of my sister. Speaking of him was taboo, so I figured he must have been a pretty awful guy. “That’s not what Mom said. She said you abandoned us.”

His hands shook as he rested them on his knees. “She was right. I did abandon you. But not on purpose.” His eyes dulled before misting over. “I shouldn’t have left the way I did.”

I sat up on my knees, placing my hands over his and searching his eyes. “You have nothing to be sorry for.” I mean, he’d had brain cancer. It had to have been so hard for him to leave us, especially considering he’d risked everything to come back as the best guardian angel ever. He’d been my loyal best friend and had saved me more than once in Hell. If I’d known, I wouldn’t have spent my entire life wrongly hating him, even going so far as to change my last name. If anyone should have felt bad, it should have been her. “She should have told me the truth. I don’t understand why my mom would have lied to me.” The fact that she did lie about my dad cut hard. Why would she do that? My chest deflated like a popped balloon. “All this time I thought my mom was perfect.”

My dad cupped my cheek in his hand before leaning over and kissing my forehead. “Nobody’s perfect, Ashley.”

Aedan cleared his throat, and I looked up as he clutched the back of the sofa, flashing me a knowing grin. I knew exactly what he was thinking. My perception of Mar had been so wrong. In fact, I’d nearly driven myself crazy with jealousy over my perceived perfection of Aedan’s ex. How wrong I’d been. In fact, I’d spent most of my life thinking most of my friends and family were perfect, and I was a flawed freak. It turned out we all had our faults, and mine were small in comparison to others. It was unfair of me to hold my mom to such high standards. She had not only been grieving my dad’s abandonment but his death.

“You’re right,” I said to my dad as I heaved a sigh of relief, letting go of my anger at my mother. “None of us are perfect.”

My cheeks flushed when my dad flashed me a knowing grin. Holy heck! He’d seen me jerking off Aedan after drinking horny water! Hang on. I’d watched my dad hump a boulder! Oh, holy dog vomit! I doubted there was enough bleach in Heaven to wash my mind of those memories.

That flush in my cheeks fanned my chest and spread all the way down to my toes. “When you were a dog, did you know you were my dad?”

“No. Guardians lose their human memories while in guardian form. We very much act and think like dogs.”

Whew! I was so relieved Jack had thought he was a dog when he was getting it on with that boulder, because that would have made our tender father-daughter moment even more awkward.

I averted my gaze, fearing my dad’s answer to my next question. “Do you remember what happened down there?”

He shrugged, scratching beneath his messy mop. “Honestly, my memories are a bit fuzzy. I hope I was a good dog.” Our eyes locked for a heartbeat before he looked away, his cheeks coloring.

Okay, I’m pretty sure he remembers the horny water incident.

Just great. While other girls had fond memories of their dads, like their first fishing trip or dance together, my dad and I would have “the boulder.”

I tried to push aside my embarrassment while forcing myself to meet his gaze. “You were the best. You saved me from a falling elevator.”
Focus on the positive, Ash. Ignore the awkward.

We turned at the familiar gong of my door. When Uncle Mikey and my grandma entered, I raced up to them, letting them shower me in hugs and kisses.

“Oh, thank goodness you’re okay.” My grandma squeezed my cheeks so hard, I felt like a bubble ready to pop. “Never, ever, make me worry like that again!”

“I won’t, Grandma.” And I meant it. I was through with crazy rescue missions to the basement, and I was determined to make sure Aedan was, too.

Uncle Mikey stepped around me, nodding at my dad. “My niece is on her way to a farm. She’s picking out a Lab puppy for my sister’s birthday. This might be your only chance.”