Dangerous for You (19 page)

“Do you remember the library?” Gabriel asked suddenly.

“I’ve never forgotten.”

He showed it to me the one night we had together in high school. Acres of bookshelves lined the high walls from top to ceiling and an exquisite stained glass window created a beautiful space that I had privately vowed to recreate one day.

“We spent so much time there because it was the only room my father wouldn’t go in. I guess it reminded him too much of his father’s study…I’m not sure. I’d like to think it was because some scrap of humanity he possessed kept him from defiling a room she loved so much. Then again maybe it was just wishful thinking.”

I would’ve thought Marie’s sanctuary would’ve drawn her husband’s jealousy even more so because it was a place that brought her happiness outside of him. Especially because it didn’t sound like he wanted Marie to have any joy.

“Do you know if they were ever happy?”

Gabriel chose his next words carefully, as if he’d never spent much time thinking about his father being a different kind of man. “My mother told me he used to be sweet and very kind. I can’t imagine it because that’s not who I knew.”

“I’m sorry.” As far as comfort goes, my constant repeating of those two words lacked eloquence but I meant it every time.

“You know I’m glad I never saw that side of him,” he declared softly. “It would’ve hurt worse if I’d lost it.”

“But you’re his son. Why did he treat you that way?”

My beautiful boy remained silent for a bit before saying, “There are some things that are not my story to tell, Emma. I hope you understand.”

I flashed back to Lucas and Marie. The way he looked at her inspired a scandalous suspicion. Gabriel was right—it wasn’t his story to tell and it wasn’t one I needed to ask about.

Jesus, I hope it’s not true.

Leaning across the seat, I feathered my lips softly across his high cheekbone. “I do understand. You can tell me as much or as little of this as you want, Gabriel. It’s okay.”

He opened his mouth, closed it, and then said in a rush, “Back in high school you always thought my life was charmed and it made me so damned angry that it wasn’t true.”

I immediately flushed with guilt. “I’m sorry for judging you like that, Gabriel. There’s no excuse. Really. I was just…so distrustful…of the world around me and of the people we went to school with that I took it on you. I’m so sorry.”

“No, I’m sorry. Here I am going on about my life—”

“I
want
you to go on about your life, Gabriel. I love you and I want to know everything about you.”

Gabriel picked up my hand and kissed the back of it. “You’re so sweet. I love you too. Still, it feels a bit poor little rich boy if you know what I mean.”

“Why? You’re rich but you’re a man and not little. Only 33% is true. So there.” I was hoping to coax a smile out of him but failed.

“I’m going on and on about my bastard of a father and you never even knew yours. It’s pretty damned insensitive of me.”

He’s the sweet one. Really.

“Gabriel, please don’t take this the wrong way but I’d rather have had no father than have a bad one.”

There’s my smile. Finally!

“I hear that, sister. No truer words have been spoken.”

We sat in companionable silence before I ventured to ask, “Is that why you were conflicted about your needs and me? You thought you were being like your father?”

“I just love how you call it my ‘needs.’ It’s so polite. ‘Darling, I feel an onset of my
needs
coming on. Would you be a dear and let me tie you up and perform wicked congress on you?’”

“Gabriel…”

He caressed my cheek. “I love to tease you pink, Emma. You’re still so innocent and all the more adorable because of it. How do you manage to still be this way?”

Because time stopped for me when I left you.

“Don’t think I didn’t notice how you avoided my question.”

Gabriel snapped his fingers. “Damn! I thought I had pulled the blindfold over your eyes.”

“Wool.”

“No, sweetheart.”

“Oh!” His wicked grin sent a tingle straight to my core. “I know you’re loving this—”

“More than words can say.”

“But…”

“But Emma wants answers or her beautiful mind will seize.” Gabriel pressed down on the gas and passed a 70s era lime-green Cadillac convertible. “Say, I’ve always wanted a car like that, Emma. What do say if I buy it off of him? Or we can trade the Mercedes for it. You think he’d take it?”

“It’s probably his grandma’s and how are you a billionaire again?”

“I’m a freak of nature like that.”

I shook my head. Gabriel didn’t want to answer the question and that was more than okay with me. So I asked another one instead.

“How does your uncle fit into all of this?”

“That’s less complicated to explain. Lucas was there for me. When my father knocked me across the room and told me I should’ve never been born, I could go see Uncle Lucas and pretend he was my real father. It was a nice fantasy for a while because they were twins—even though I could easily tell the difference between them because of their eyes.”

“Were they different colors?”

“No. Lucas looked like he loved me and my father looked like he hated me.”

Pain rolled through me. I couldn’t imagine my mother hating me, so knowing Gabriel suffered it his whole childhood—I nearly felt sick with sadness. I wanted to hug him, to do anything I could to take the pain away.

“Does your uncle have any children?”

“None.”

“So you’re a bit more than his nephew, right?”

He glanced at me before looking back at the road. “What do you mean?”

I wasn’t going to look deeper into Gabriel’s wary reaction. “From what you’ve told me, you’re like a son to him too.”

“You could say that,” he shrugged. “Lucas never made excuses for my father’s behavior, but he always told me it wasn’t my fault and I was going to grow up to be a better man than both of them. During my darkest days, back when I was going straight into self-destruct, those were the only good words I remembered.”

I sat up, feeling my heart pound with realization that I couldn’t deny. “You really love him.”

The tight set of Gabriel’s mouth along with his clipped nod communicated just how close to the emotional edge he was.

“But you were so cold to him at the ballet. I thought you couldn’t stand him.”

“No, not all.”

“Then why did you act like that?”

“Because I knew who he was there with and I was pissed because of it. I asked him not to do it and he still did it anyways.”

“Lucas told you ahead of time he’d be there with Embry’s family?”

“Yeah, he did. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, but I didn’t think he’d show up at our box.”

Even I could tell Lucas Gordon was the kind of man to do exactly what he pleased, regardless of how it’d affect others.

Shit, shit, shit! Don’t tell me I’ve just made things worse for him by bringing all this up about Lucas and Embry.

“Stop.”

“What?”

“Stop blaming yourself.” A ghost of a smirk touched his lips. “And before you ask—I know you, remember? Everything in the world is always your fault.”

“Not everything, just most things.”

“I hate to break it to you, baby, but you’re wrong.”

I stuck my tongue out at him. “I still have to say it though.”

Gabriel let out a lengthy sigh and waved his hand. “Go on, my love. Unburden your overworked conscience and pay your penance so you may find peace.”

“I’m sorry for saying anything that might end up causing problems between you and your uncle.”

“Baby, any problems that crop up are the ones he started. Besides, once Lucas really gets to know you he’ll understand why I love you so much. When it comes down to it he’s always wanted my happiness. He’ll see how much you make me happy.”

Jittery and less confident about it than Gabriel was, I managed to put faith in his hope. I kissed his cheek. “All right. You trot me out to my best advantage.”

“Done. Now I just need one more thing from you, Emma.” He tapped his lips once. “They’re jealous of all the cheek attention, you know.”

I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed the corner of his mouth quickly. “Good now?”

“Hmm, I’m afraid they’re still jealous.”

“I’m sorry, but I don’t want us to crash.”

“True. That would be a crimp in our plans this weekend.” He frowned and then brightened. “How about you promise me all the kisses,
wherever
I want, later on tonight?”

I leaned back in my seat, tilting my head as if he’d spoken to me in a language I didn’t quite understand. “You mean at your mother’s house?”

“Yep.”

“Gabriel!”

“Emma!”

“We can’t do
that
in her house.”

“Why not?”

“Because it would be weird.” My fingers entwined nervously as I stared down at my lap.

“Baby, we’re not teenagers anymore,” Gabriel pointed out reasonably. “Do you really propose we never make love when we visit her? Have separate beds or even separate rooms?”

“Well, maybe.”

Gabriel’s hand cut through the air. “Absolutely, positively not! You sleep where I sleep and I sleep where you sleep. That’s the rules.”

“We don’t always follow the rules.”

“Like when?”

“When you travel for business.”

Gabriel tossed me a shameless grin. “I’m still working on you becoming my muse, Emma. Once that happens you’ll get to fly out with me and all will be right with the rules.”

“Dream on.”

“I will. That and plot until all my dreams come true.”

I slugged him, gently, on the arm. “Are you sure she won’t be offended by us sharing the same room?”

“Emma, love, my mother doesn’t think I’m a virgin. Especially when Ms. Ferramon came over to the house to give me a piece of her mind before she took a bat to my windshield.”

The French teacher. Oh, Gabriel! You really did it with her.

“Don’t tell me you
didn’t
believe the rumor? Because it was absolutely true.”

I wrinkled my nose at him. “I don’t even want to get into that, Gabriel other than gross! And maybe Marie doesn’t think you’re a virgin, but that doesn’t mean she’ll want us fornicating in her house.”

“Fornicating? I can’t believe you just used that word, Emma.”

Blushing yet again, I defended myself, albeit weakly. “It’s an appropriate word.”

“Not for long.”

I dared to glance at Gabriel before looking down at my lap again and then out the window. His blunt approach over our future marital state left me tongue-tied and more than a bit excited.

“Breathe, Emma.”

My finger traced the edge of the door. “I’m breathing.”

“Really? Because all I’m hearing are squeaks of air trying to make it through those tiny pursed lips.”

I inhaled deeply and then let it out. “See? I’m breathing.”

“That’s so good to know. Oh, and Emma?”

“Yes?”

“I’m not asking you yet.”

“I know.”

“But I will.”

THIRTEEN

I stood there, thinking about the wonderful man waiting for me at the dock. My heart pounded. It pounded because of the conversation I should’ve never heard and the conversation I wished I’d never had.

What am I going to do now?

Gabriel and I had just arrived maybe an hour ago. Marie welcomed us both warmly into her house, slipping her arm in mine as she showed us to our sprawling room. Catching Gabriel’s smug smirk, I rolled my eyes but I was secretly pleased that we wouldn’t have to sleep apart. Whether we’d fornicate or not was still on the table.

It’d also made me wonder if my mom would be so accommodating to the similar sleeping arrangements. I thought she would but I couldn’t be sure because we’d never crossed that bridge before.

Suddenly, I couldn’t wait to introduce Gabriel to my mom. I also got excited thinking about showing him the house I was so close to buying for her. I felt pure happiness pour over me and how well life was turning out for us both.

I had Gabriel and he had me. What more would I ever need?

Each step up the winding staircase brought another facet of my inspired imagination out. I imagined when Gabriel would ask me to marry him. I hoped I didn’t do something as cliché as crying, but I was sure I’d bawl my eyes out. Maybe the sight of my swollen, red eyes and runny nose would send my love tearing out of the romantic spot he’d chosen for us.