DARK SOULS (Dark Souls Series) (40 page)

She had never met her match before, and it made some sort of divine sense that it would be him. That it would be Asher.

He pressed his hand harder into in my neck, crushing my larynx as his eyes bored into mine. They were so bright I thought I would be blinded, until I realized that my eyes must have been having the same effect on him.

Our faces came closer together, our jaws snapping and teeth flashing at each other against the city lights.

She tightened her own grip on his neck, and I was able to feel the tearing of his skin and the crush of his delicate bones as she maintained her hold on him. His grip began to slacken as sweat began to dot his brow, his arms beginning to tremble.

I realized with heavy despair that the darkness had him.

She forced my face upwards and into his, her teeth grazing his cheek as she snapped at him, leaving bloody trails of red in her wake.

The pleasure of tasting his warm Hunter’s blood on my tongue rocketed through me, lighting a fiery explosion within my body at the same time I fought to suppress my own clenching need for his blood.

The silver in his eyes flickered, in and out, in and out, fading like a dying firefly. I could only wonder if his power was waning because he couldn’t hold the dark force of a demon for long. Perhaps that was why three of them were needed. The Trine. My humanity.

Don’t kill him! Just let us get away
, I continued to plead.
Don’t kill him...

The darkness was too deeply entrenched in her fury. I fought for control, distracting her as I struggled against her flames and held down her need to tear at Asher’s throat.

She fought back just as hard, and I felt actual pain as I pressed myself up against her, trying to pierce through the murky fog of her own dark soul that writhed within me.

I thought of him.

I thought of Asher, flashing back to when I first saw him, his eyes so shadowed. I thought of our first conversation and the automatic pull I had felt when I was with him. I remembered the feelings he brought into my life: warmth, tenderness, understanding, strength. He was my humanity. He was my soul.

It was a connection. Our connection. I wouldn’t break it. Not tonight.

I felt the familiar white light form inside me and I reached for it, drawing it forward and allowing it to spread, smothering my dark twin and feeding my light, revitalizing my soul as it pulsed out of my body and encased me, transformed me, and protected me.

I opened my eyes through the white light, suddenly finding myself back in control. I felt my lips slide back to normal as my fangs receded and my face softened back into a human. My eyes filled with tears as I looked up through the residual glow to see the monster I had made Asher become. His eyes bulged and his fangs glinted with the demon strength that he so loathed, his muscles tensed and hardened with his own dark acceptance of the very evil that he so mercilessly fought against. I let go of his neck and gently wrapped my arms around him, bringing his monstrous face closer to mine.

I was vulnerable, I was exposed, but I was me. I was Emily.

“Asher,” I whispered against his fangs. “Asher, please.”

Even through their blinding, sterling glow, I saw the shock in his eyes at seeing me, at seeing the face that he knew and the true Emily behind it. He raised his eyes to mine and held them, capturing me.

“Emily...” he groaned through his fangs.

My gaze softened as I watched his fangs recede, his eyes fading from a flashing white gold to a tempered grey, like the quiet calm after a storm. His cheekbones receded and reformed into that unforgettable, beautiful face that would stay with me, always.

He looked at me, his eyes so filled with pain, and I gazed back, allowing him to see my torture, my torment.

And I knew.

I tilted my chin upwards, my lips meeting his.

I felt a flash and then an explosion of colors behind my eyes as we connected. I put everything I had into that kiss. My childhood, my dreams, my heart, and my soul—every fiber of my being converging into that singular kiss. I wanted to show him all of me, to leave myself exposed before I accepted what I now knew was inevitable.

What I now knew was my destiny.

I wouldn’t sacrifice anyone else.  I knew that above all, in the place of others, in the place of Macy, in the place of
him
, I would gladly sacrifice myself.

“I’m not a monster...” I breathed into his mouth.

I felt a sharp pain in my stomach as an answer.

It turned out the Hunter had a weapon after all.

I felt the life drain out of me through the wound at the center of my body.  My blood flowed around the silver spear imbedded within me, the cold steel of the Hunter ripping into my skin. He remained on top of me, watching my eyes sputter with gold, my dying gaze framed by the purple glow of his weapon. I stared back at him, barely blinking and finally seeing what he had been trying desperately to hide from me this entire time.

The pain, the responsibility, the loneliness, and most importantly, the love.

“I’m sorry, Emily,” he whispered, kissing my lips one more time as I began to fade into unconsciousness.

The last thing I remember seeing before allowing the sweet, silent blackness to overtake me, the last picture I would forever hold onto, was finally seeing the warmth in his gaze before his head dipped down, resting his forehead against my collarbone as he felt my life slip away.

CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT

I woke up, gasping for air and feeling more pain than I had ever thought possible. I glanced around me and saw that I was back in my Secret Clubhouse, but I couldn’t for the life of me remember how I had gotten there.

I sat amongst the gymnasium debris, breathing slowly and sorting through my thoughts to try and remember.

I had come face to face with three demons. I had saved Macy and selfishly erased her memories of the monster that I was. And...Asher.

Oh, Asher...

It finally came to me in a sudden burst of heart-wrenching understanding.

Asher was the Hunter. Asher, the one soul I think I was falling in love with, was now my worst enemy. My stomach sank with the realization of it, my heart shattering into tiny, jagged pieces.

I raised my hand to my head, hoping to quell the pounding ache that pulsed into my brain and seemed to shoot out of my soul, and it was then that I realized, with slow, painstaking fear, that I couldn’t feel my hand on my forehead. I couldn’t even lift my hand.

My mouth began to make sounds, but the voice that came out of it, though my own, was not being used by me.

Dread rushed through me as I realized, with growing clarity, that the rumbling laughter that was shaking my body was not my own.

“Killing you only made me stronger,” she said, enjoying every moment as the consequences of my actions began to sink in. “Why do you think I allowed you to come forward in the end...?”

No
, I cried, though my mouth didn’t move and my voice did not make a sound.

“Welcome to the darkness, dear Emily,” she said, using
my
mouth, taking control of
my
voice.

I wailed inside, and if my voice were my own, I knew the force of it would have come out like the gods, snaking through the buildings, calling to the dark clouds and thundering into the skies.

But all that met me was my own silence.

I was no longer me.

I was the darkness.

I was evil.

“Time to show you what I can do,” she said softly, before rocketing up through the roof and into the black, starless night.

EPILOGUE

He’d left her.

He would leave her forever alone, to suffer in never-ending torment, to beg for the fires of Hell to consume her, to destroy her once and for all.

She lay on the shower floor for hours upon hours, until the very last drop of searing heat from the shower transformed into an icy blast, and she remained there, shivering, her teeth chattering, her fingers trembling against the freezing tiled floors.

Eventually she was able to stand up, her fingers clawing and slipping against the tiled walls as her legs weakly unfolded beneath her. Standing, she lay against the cool ceramic tiles for a while longer, breathing in and out, in and out, droplets of water sliding down her face and nestling in the cupid’s bow of her upper lip before dropping silently onto the floor.

She stumbled out of the shower, nearly falling back onto the floor, but able to right herself against the towel railing. There she turned, leaning forward onto the sink so she could face her clear, haggard reflection in the mirror above it.

She paused, but only for a moment, as she stared deep into her own eyes, as if she could find the shattered soul that she knew lay beneath. But she could not.

With one last, final breath of sorrow, she broke her gaze from her reflection and lowered her head. Raising her right hand, she lifted it towards her reflection, her fingers caressing the cool, mirrored glass before she brought her hand slowly, achingly back towards her.

She lowered her hand until finally, she brought it to rest on the rounded, growing curve of her abdomen.

There, she let it remain.

THE END

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

This book could not have been written without my incredible support system. Please bear with me, because while I know this section is a bit boring, it is so wonderfully important to write.

First, I thank the amazing people who read my first draft and actually made me believe that I had something: Nicole Ferguson, Josh Gohari, Dan Brozovic, Bonnie Simon, Lee Horowitz, Joanna Wine, and Katie West. You guys made me believe in myself, and I can’t thank you enough. Especially for not going “Uh, what?” and thinking I was joking when I told you I wrote an entire book. You are all awesome!

Most importantly, I want to thank my family. Mom and Dad, thank you for supporting me no matter what path I chose to veer into. Oliver, I love you, and your encouragement is the reason I was able to turn my first sentence into an entire story.

Lastly, I want to thank whoever just read this book. Though I don’t know your name, you are just as significant as the people I listed above. Thank you for reading what I poured my whole heart into, and I truly hope you enjoyed what I absolutely loved to write. You are responsible for making my dream come true, because it was realized as soon as you held
Dark Souls
in your hands.